He must be doing carpentry work, I thought when the scent of wood polish and sawdust hit my nose. He couldn’t possibly live here. This isn’t his sort of place…
“He’ll see you,” the woman said when she came back into the foyer, though she grabbed my arm and gripped it hard in her strong fingers. “He wasn’t expecting you at all, you little liar. I’ll escort you out the instant he tells me to, you hear?”
Before I could respond, she was gone down the darkened hallway toward the back of the house.
A TV flickered blue and white in the pitch black parlor as I stepped inside. Two huge velvet sofas stretched across the room on either side of a cold marble fireplace. There, on one of the sofas, stretched Jack.
“Hey, Cassy.”
His voice told me he was drunk. Like, very drunk. Nonetheless, the sight of him was enough to make my heart melt.
“Hey, yourself,” I answered back as I nervously made my way toward him. The room smelled of bourbon and woodsmoke, sawdust and floor polish.
“Nice place you’ve got here,” I said as I soaked in the majestic double parlor. “Is it yours?”
“Not quite,” he answered in a rough voice, though he didn’t offer any more information.
The cold light of the TV danced over his naked chest, robbing him of his deep tan. His dark hair was tousled and his eyes were half-shut. He didn’t reach out to me. He didn’t call me closer. He lay there staring at me as I sat on the sofa opposite him.
I saw his eyes flash down toward my belly, but he didn’t say anything. He just curled his strong arm behind his head and sighed.
“I always knew you were resourceful, but I didn’t think you’d track me down here, of all places. I was very clear to my secretary that I wasn’t to be disturbed, and she is the only person who knows this address.”
“Don’t be mad at her,” I said as a pang of guilt shot through me. “She was only taking pity on me. I begged her to help me. It’s my fault.”
“Mm-hm,” he answered as he sat up and grabbed his glass. It was empty, so he set it down again. “Well, you’re here. Say what you came to say.”
“I came to say—,” I started to speak, but he cut me off.
“On second thought, I think I’ll need another drink before I can listen.”
“No—no, you don’t,” I said as I grabbed his hand and forced him to set the cup back on the table. “Listen to me, for goodness sake, Jack.”
“Alright, alright. You win.”
He leaned back against the velvet sofa and stared at me. His expression was so guarded, I felt like a stranger sitting in front of him. There was no familiarity, no warmth, no nothing. I wasn’t the woman he’d devoured with kisses or the one who made his eyes light up. I was just some inconvenience, a visitor he couldn’t wait to get rid of so he could get back to nursing his pain.
“I know you’re angry,” I said as my gaze drifted down to his bare feet on the soft Persian carpet. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you sooner, the day I found out, but I didn’t and I can’t take it back.”
He shifted uncomfortably like he was crawling out of his skin but he didn’t stand up and leave, which I counted as a victory.
“Cassy, I don’t want to hear about this,” he said with a cringe as he turned his face away from me. “It’s—it’s in the past. Maybe we can talk about it years from now, but not right now, okay? Not right now.”
“The baby is yours, Jack, not Cash’s,” I blurted out in frustration. “The baby is yours whether you believe me or not. Betty Willows told a lie about me and said the baby belonged to Cash. You need to know that before you push me aside.”
The words hung in the air as heavy as the smell of magnolia flowers. I counted time by the frantic beating of my heart. It felt like a millennium sitting in silence before I finally lifted my eyes to his face. Oh, what torture I saw on his features. Pain twisted his jaw and brow.
“It can’t be,” he breathed with a shake of his head. “It’s not possible.”
“It is possible. In fact, it’s impossible for it to be anyone else,” I said as I slid to the floor in front of him and laid my hands over his knees. “There hasn’t been anyone else. You were my first… and my only.”
The smell of his body intoxicated me. It was like smelling water after forty days in the desert. My whole body came alive as I inhaled his scent. I dug my fingers into his strong thighs and remembered all the times I’d felt his legs between mine with all their strength and vigor.
“There’s only been you, Jack. Only you,” I repeated in a whisper as I searched his face for a sign of softness or trust.
“But Cash,” he said, “You’ve been seeing him so much. Why would you do that if you didn’t have a reason?”
Doubt glimmered across his features like a mirage, but only for a moment. It disappeared and was replaced by a practiced hardness, a distance that protected him. He didn’t trust me yet. He’d taken too deeply to heart the thought of me sleeping with Cash. Betraying him, betraying us.
“Cash is nothing to me. The only reason I ever went with him was because my parents made me. They want this baby to be his because they want me to marry him. They want—they want me to marry him because they need his money. There’s some deal with an oil derrick…”
Jack sat up and shook his head as his hands came together in his lap. Anger stirred him. He met my eyes and held them and I saw for the first time since I’d arrived the same tender rawness I saw when he told me he loved me—and the same power I saw the night he saved me from Cash.
“They wanted to tell a lie to sell you off and fill Conrad Peterson’s coffers? Hell to that,” he growled as his hands closed over my upper arms, caressing the skin with the calloused pads of his fingers and thumbs.
“That’s what I said and…” My voice trailed off as I remembered that morning and the anger on my mother’s face. “Mother told me to leave. I’d rather make my own way and never speak to them again than be sold off like that.”
“Cass,” he whispered as his lips brushed against my forehead, sending a shiver of pleasure through me. “I am so sorry I didn’t listen to you.”
There was a release of tension that loosened his whole body, as if peace had finally found him. His lips slid down my cheek, soft and warm. The heat of his mouth melted me as he kissed the spot below my earlobe. I held my breath, waiting to wake up from whatever dream this was as he kissed a path down my neck and pulled away.
Lips parted, eyes half-closed, he drank me down like cool water. A moan escaped his throat as he kissed me soft and slow. Every nerve in my body danced as he pulled me close and opened his mouth to me.
“Jack,” I whispered as I pressed my body to his, relishing his size and strength. He was an island of calm in a chaotic world.
He pulled me onto the velvet sofa as our bodies melted together, becoming one again. The grand old house dissolved around us into a lush velvet blur as warm night air flooded in through the half-open windows. I was in a strange place, but I was home because I was in Jack’s arms.
I was home.
“This,” he whispered as his hand came down to rest on my belly. “This is our baby.”
I nodded as tears escaped my eyes.
“Yeah. That’s our baby,” I answered before he stole my voice with a smiling kiss.
Clothes and worries fell away as we came together after so long, clinging to each other, exploring each other. He slipped inside me with a growl, making me whimper with pleasure. It was all too good, all too much, all too easy…
“That’s it,” I breathed when the rhythm was right. “Like that… don’t stop. Don’t ever stop.”
My fingers dug into his back and shoulders, holding him steady as my hips rocked beneath him. Waves of perfect pleasure lapped over me like warm ocean waves. A sweet, subtle rush of tingling filled me, building pressure between my legs.
“Mmmm…”
A moan escaped me, filling the quiet night air as Jack gripped my hips and lift
ed me.
He turned from tender to savage as he curled his hips into me, riding me hard. Everything turned to heat and fire as he ravished each other with our mouths and fingers and arms and legs. There was a reckoning in how we made love, a sort of exorcism of all our fears and doubts and anger.
“Cass,” he groaned as his rhythm quickened. The spark he’d lit inside me started to smolder; I was close, and so was he. I felt the heat moving up my spine like a lit fuse sparking up a line of blasting powder.
“Hard… make it hurt,” I whimpered as he took me like a beast, making my body pulse with heat. “Yes…”
His mouth was everywhere—my breasts and neck and lips—as he filled me up. It all became a blur as I shattered beneath him, my mind completely dissolved by the intense ecstasy in my body. I cried out as he drove deep into me and released his pleasure, filling me up as I pulled him deep inside.
All the doubt and pain I’d felt, all the worry I’d had that Jack wouldn’t believe me, that he’d refuse me, melted away as our bodies came together again. It was a homecoming.
“I missed you,” he whispered as we lay tangled in a half-naked heap on the velvet sofa as night air poured in through the open windows.
“I missed you, too. I—I thought for sure you’d send me away when I showed up here.”
He shifted his head against my breasts and looked up into my eyes.
“I nearly did, honey. I’m glad I listened for once in my life.”
That made me laugh with joy. He sounded like his old self again, poking fun at his own stubbornness.
“Me too. That in and of itself is a miracle,” I quipped before he stole my words with a kiss. His lips lingered against mine for what seemed like an eternity before he pulled back.
“We’d better head upstairs,” he said in a low voice as his fingers trailed down my cheek and neck, making me shiver. “The maid could come in at any minute.”
“We can’t risk your reputation, Mr. Jolivet,” I giggled as I stood up and held out my hand to him. “Lead the way.”
Heaven is cool sheets on a warm morning with the birds chirping outside and the smell of coffee wafting up from the kitchen. I opened my eyes to heaven and looked around as glimmers of sunlight danced across the wall and bed.
His voice came from downstairs, singing some old song. The clatter of dishes and the sound of running water came and went, replaced by the sound of his footsteps on the centuries-old floorboards.
I closed my eyes and imagined waking up like this every morning, but with our baby. I imagined kissing her goodbye and going to classes at the university, then kissing her hello when I got home. My heart swelled in my chest until it felt like my ribs would explode, the fantasy was so precious.
Jack’s side of the bed was crumpled and empty, too tempting for me to ignore. I stretched out my arms and legs and buried my face in his pillow. The smell of his hair and the fresh, spicy smell of his cologne clung to the linens.
As I teetered right on the edge of dozing off, the sound of his phone brought me back to reality. A single little chime caught my attention. Normally, I wouldn’t look, but I did. I don’t know why I did.
The screen lit up with a message.
You never called last night. I’ll stop by on my way to Terrebonne. Be home.
The words made sense, but they told me a story that made my heart ache. Especially when the name of the sender registered.
Jolene.
Jolene D’Hauterive.
Cash’s words came flooding back to mock me. My hands shook as I set the phone aside and sat up in bed, holding the sheet over my naked breasts. At first, no tears would come. At first, all I felt was numbness and a vague anger.
“Morning, my darlin’,” Jack half-sang, half-whispered as he pushed the door open with his elbow and carried in the breakfast tray.
A silver coffee service released a plume of steam beside a vase with a magnolia bud lolling over the side. A plate of toast and good andouille held court around little crystal cups of jam and rich yellow butter.
He paused when he saw my face, his brows twisting with concern.
“What is it? Did something happen?”
He set the tray on the foot of the bed and sat down beside me. His huge hand curled over mine, holding it tenderly. The familiar, precious feel of his fingers warred with the rage and betrayal I felt inside, knocking loose a tear that slid down my cheek.
I held out the phone.
“Jolene D’Hauterive?”
Confusions flickered over his features. He cocked his head.
“What about her?”
So he does know her. It wasn’t just a freak wrong number, as unlikely as that would be.
“Why were you supposed to call her last night?”
“What on Earth are you talking about, Cassy?”
I held out the phone to him again. A bark of laughter escaped his lips when he read the message, as if something had dawned on him.
“Oh, that. It’s nothing to worry about,” he started to say, but I couldn’t listen. I couldn’t listen to whatever excuse he was about to give me.
“Save your breath,” I said as I stood up and grabbed my clothes from the night before, which were in a crumpled heap on the bedroom floor. “I—I know that you slept with her. I know it.”
“I never—,” he said as he stood up and rushed around the bed to wrap his arms around me. “I’ve never slept with Jolene D’Hauterive, Cassy. Where on Earth did you get that idea?”
“Never mind,” I answered, knowing full well that if I said Cash Jackson told me, he’d make it out to be a lie told to hurt me.
At first, I thought the same, but the coincidence was just too much. There’s no way Cash could concoct a lie about Jolene (of all people) and then she just happens to text Jack out of the blue. It was just so unlikely.
“Please, where are you going?” he said as I pulled on my shoes and threw my hair up into a messy top knot.
“Home. I’m going home, wherever that is. I’ve put up with a lot of bullshit in my life, Jack, but I won’t be lied to and I won’t deal with another woman.”
“Cassy—neither thing is happening to you. For goodness’ sake, listen to me. Jolene is just a business associate. Whoever told you there was more to it is mistaken or just plain lying to you.”
Everything was too raw to listen to him. I needed to get away. I needed to think about it, to figure things out. I needed to not be there, standing in front of him, feeling humiliated and hurt.
When he touched me, it released a floodgate. Tears streamed down my face and I couldn’t catch my breath, but every time he touched me to soothe me, I pushed him away. I couldn’t stand his touch. It felt false.
“Leave me alone, please. Just leave me alone,” I sobbed as I wiped my eyes and tried to get ahold of myself. “I need to go. I can’t stay here.”
“Cassy, you can’t drive in your condition. Here, I’ll leave. Let me leave and you can rest here for a while until you calm down.”
“Until I calm down?”
If there was one thing I hated, it was being told to calm down.
“You know what I meant,” he answered back as he stepped toward the door. “Just stay a little bit and I’ll stay out of your way. We—we have more we need to talk about.”
A million thoughts swirled through my mind, each more confusing than the last. Last night had been the eye of storm, it seemed; a false calm before the strongest winds started blowing. I felt torn apart by this strange, beautiful redhead who was of an age with Jack, someone who could relate to him differently than I was able to, someone who was—let’s face it—far more beautiful than I’d ever be.
“No, there’s no more to talk about. Well, beside money for the baby and when you’ll have visitation,” I said as I chewed my lip to stop it from trembling. “I—I can’t do this anymore. I can’t stand the chaos.”
I grabbed my bag and my phone and rushed past him, jogging down the stairs through a haze of tears.
> “Cassy!” he called out after me. “Come back—it’s all a misunderstanding…”
I slammed the door, cutting off the rest of his words. I hardly remembered getting in my car or driving through the lush green blur of the Garden District, but I did. Soon, I was driving back to Buford along back roads with only my thoughts to keep me company.
What am I gonna do? I wondered for the thousandth time as a jolt of adrenaline rocked me. What on Earth am I gonna do?
Chapter 17
“That’ll be twenty-two dollars and fifty-five cents.”
The girl at the register spoke like her mouth wouldn’t melt butter, but I saw the look she gave me as I walked up to the register with my big old belly on display.
“Here you go,” I said as I handed over a few crisp bills and coins. I tried to smile like her attitude wasn’t getting to me, but it curdled on my face when I saw the old lady behind me tsk and shake her head.
“Alright, here’s your change, Miss Peterson,” the girl answered with a heavy emphasis on the Miss. The other checker sniggered and the old lady behind me said something under her breath.
“Thank you very much,” I managed to say as I grabbed my bag and change and darted from the store.
It’d been like that since I came back to Buford; an unrelenting stream of judgement. It was enough to make me tear my hair out. Just walking down the street made me feel like a sideshow attraction, even in my own neighborhood.
Smiles were suspect and always came with a passive-aggressive Bless your heart. I almost came to welcome the disapproving frowns because at least they were honest.
Even in my own house, I was tormented. Conrad barely acknowledged my presence and mother’d disappear into the next room whenever I came around.
I sat in my car gripping the steering wheel to calm my nerves before I drove home. When I came inside, the sitting room was empty though I could tell mother and Conrad had been sitting there just moments before; they’d probably taken off when they heard my car in the driveway. To say our relationship was strained would be an understatement.
“Just two more weeks and I’ll be at school,” I whispered to myself as I went upstairs to my room. It was my only sanctuary. Just me and my books, like it was always meant to be. I was never meant to be the shiny new debutante married to the rich hunk. I was just… me.
The Debutante Page 12
