“I’m fine, I guess. I’m just kind of bored. I have lots of free time right now.”
“That’s good, dear,” her mother said, then settled into an awkward pause.
Freya looked at her mother curiously, certain she had some sort of agenda, another reason for the unexpected call.
“Freya, dear, can we talk about the procedure?” her mother asked, squinting a bit.
“Um, okay, but there really isn’t much to tell. I feel fine. I’m just…getting better and such.” Freya walked over to her sofa and sat down, as she had a feeling the conversation was going to take a while. “Hey, aren’t you supposed to be doing your civil duty right now? How did you get time off to call me?”
“They gave me extra time,” she said, with a strange tension in her voice, as if she wasn’t quite comfortable with the conversation herself.
“Really? Why would they do that?” As soon as the words tumbled out of Freya’s mouth, she instantly regretted them. She certainly didn’t want her mother to think she was not happy to see her, but she couldn’t help being confused. “I mean, I’m always glad to see you, Mom, but this is a little unusual, is it not?”
“No, Freya. Actually, it’s the norm. See, some young women tend to have a bit of a hard time during recovery. I know I did. They allow us some extra time for, well, in case you need to talk about it.” Her mother looked at her expectantly, waiting for her to speak.
“Talk about it? I already said I’m okay. I’m fine. Really. I-I didn’t want to… Wait. Why did you have a hard time with it? You already had me, didn’t you?” she asked, now even more confused.
“Yes, but as lucky as I was to have you, I wanted to have more than one child, honey. Some people get to have two, and I just loved you so much that I really wanted to do it again. The doctor told me that after women give birth, they are injected with hormones so they cannot conceive again for three years. That is apparently the amount of time it takes for the body to rebuild and heal, so the second child will be as healthy and strong as the first. When you were 3 years old, and I was ready to go in for my yearly physical, I received the notice to be sterilized.” Her mother’s eyes started to glisten a little, and she looked away.
Freya was surprised by her mother’s story, as she had never before shared that she wanted another child. As she looked at her mother’s sad face, Freya thought about Gita and her emotional reaction to the procedure. Freya really wasn’t bothered by it like they were, and she was beginning to wonder if there was something wrong with her.
“I’m sorry you’re sad you couldn’t have more children, Mom. I talked to one of my classmates today. She just underwent the procedure, and she’s sad too.” Freya was trying to at least sound empathetic, since she couldn’t exactly relate. “I didn’t have my heart set on children, so I’m not really sad about it. I’m just a little sore and tired,” she said, partly because it was true but mostly because she was not entirely comfortable with the conversation and wanted to get it over with. She had never seen her mother this way, crying and upset, and even though she seemed to be expecting Freya to feel the same way, she simply didn’t.
“Oh, I didn’t know that. I assumed you’d be disappointed,” her mother said, trying to put a small smile back on her face. She was as confused as Freya; she was supposed to be comforting her daughter and not the other way around.
“Well, I never really thought much about it, until I got the notice. I’ve always been more focused on my civil duty. I guess now, I’m actually more worried about being coupled.” She did not mean to share that last bit with her mother, but it just kind of came out.
“Oh, don’t worry about that, dear. The State will find the perfect match for you. I’m sure of it,” her mother responded, sounding a bit more chipper, as if she was happy for the change in subject.
Freya, on the other hand, was not at all happy about it. “It’s not that, Mom. I don’t actually think I want to be coupled. I think I’d prefer independent living,” Freya admitted, scratching her head.
“Nonsense, Freya! I’m going to tease you for saying that after you meet your match and fall head-over-heels in love with him.” Her mother giggled, then muttered something that sounded like, “Ridiculous.”
The last person Freya wanted to discuss this with was her mother, and her chuckling angered her. “Well, I guess we’ll just have to wait and see. Not everyone is chosen for coupling, now are they?” She huffed and crossed her arms, then slouched back on the sofa.
“Freya, dear, don’t worry. I remember being afraid about independent living, too, when I was your age. It doesn’t happen to many, and if it does… Well, let’s just say, it’s for good reason.”
“Okay, well, we’ll wait and see. Look, Mom, I’m tired and in pain. I’m supposed to get lots of rest. I will talk to you again at our next meeting,” Freya said, looking disgruntled. She was not really in that much physical pain, but the conversation was certainly giving her a headache.
“Okay, dear. You’re right. You need your rest. I will talk to you next week. Love you, dear,” her mother said, her smile melting into a frown again.
“We’ll talk soon. Bye, Mom.” She then got up, gave a little wave to the monitor, and shut it off.
As she walked back to the sofa, Freya had one thought on her mind: How is that woman my mother and not Gita’s? Perhaps if she had called Gita instead, they could have cried together and talked about finding true love. She couldn’t believe her mother had had the same fear as Gita, that they were both horrified at the thought of independent living, something Freya dreamt about. In fact, as the days waned on, Freya became more and more confident her dream would become reality. The tests had been right about everything else, and she hoped she would be selected to live independently. After talking to Gita and her mother, her suspicions she was a bit different from most females was confirmed. As she thought about it, she recalled her mother’s words, “Let’s just say it’s for good reason.” She wondered what her mother meant by that, and what those reasons might be.
Chapter 4
Freya continued healing, each day feeling less pain than she had the day before. She saw Gita during their classes together. Gita always gave her a half-smile and a cordial hello, but there were no more offers or requests to spend their free time together. Freya liked Gita, but since they didn’t have much in common, she did not instigate any together time. Mostly, Freya was quite happy to get back into her normal routine: going to the Education Center for the first half of the day, working in the greenhouse after, then spending two hours of free time doing puzzles on her tablet before bed.
Freya really did enjoy her work in the greenhouse located on the top floor of her apartment building. She worked in the greenhouse at the Education Center with the instructor and other students, then took a short break to transfer to her own greenhouse and eat her evening meal. She very much preferred the small greenhouse, she was starting to realize, because there were fewer females who worked there. Some buildings that were close together shared one greenhouse; the State had joined the two top floors to create larger spaces.
In history class, they had learned that back when people lived completely above ground, the roofs were used to just keep the snow out. Then, people grew things in large fields, planting them right in the ground, and used copious amounts of fuel and power to harvest the food and transport it, sometimes clear across the world. Freya thought the former agricultural process must be partially responsible for why society collapsed, and the State had to take over.
Now, most food was grown in greenhouses on the top floor of the tall buildings, completely encased in glass where there was the most sunlight. The food was then transported, most often on foot, around to the cooks, who prepared meals for the residents of each building. It was a perfect balance. There were large fans with enormous air ducts. The plants produced a fresh supply of oxygen, and the air ducts moved air throughout the buildings. Freya had a real appreciation for the ecosystem that had been artificially
created, as it sounded so much more efficient than living above ground like people used to. That kind of life sounded barbaric, and she was glad to be living in an era of efficiency.
Freya knew it would not be long until they moved her to an adult independent living structure. Even though her apartment was temporary, it was starting to feel like home, almost as if it belonged to her. When she first moved into the apartment, she didn’t like that it was just one big open space, without a separate bedroom, but after living there for a while, she realized there was really no need for extra walls. Couples were granted larger living spaces since there were two people to occupy them. Couples with children had the largest living spaces, and they moved to larger and larger apartments each time they were permitted to have another child. Freya had grown up in a two-bedroom apartment, and once she was sent away for education, her parents were moved into a one-bedroom apartment building for couples without children.
Days passed into weeks, and Freya once again became so settled and content in her routine that she hardly noticed the passing of time. She knew she was fast approaching the end of her education, and she had no aspirations to teach, go into research, or do anything else, for that matter. She would soon move into the permanent living structure, and the apartment she was in would be handed over to another young female. Most of all, Freya would miss the greenhouse. Her thoughts often drifted in that direction, but they only confirmed she was ready to move on.
One evening, Freya returned to the apartment and not at all to her surprise, found a notice in her inbox of an email sent to her tablet. She quickly opened it and read it right away:
Freya 117:
You are to vacate this premises at 08:00 tomorrow. Dress in the assigned free time uniform. Leave all clothing and education materials in the apartment. New uniforms will be provided at the new destination, and education materials will no longer be required. Follow the underground path illuminated by Security. You will receive your new civil duty assignment once you have checked into the permanent living structure assigned to you.
Regards,
The State
Freya let out a deep breath. Finally, it was time, and she realized all her anxiety and questioning had been in vain. It truly was the moment she had been waiting for, a weight lifted off her shoulders and a dream-come-true. Deep down, she knew all along the State would choose her for independent living, but the fear of the unknown had lingered in her mind.
She looked around the apartment, wondering if there was anything she should take with her. As she perused the bathroom, she remembered she had not brought anything with her from her parental home. The hairbrush, comb, and even elastics were all provided for her, in the apartment when she arrived. The uniforms were already hanging in the closet. Once she had noticed that the pants were too short, but the very next day, all the uniforms in her closet fit, new ones to accommodate her growth. Never once did she have to tell anyone; somehow, they just knew and took care of it.
Freya realized she had been standing there holding the hairbrush, pondering for a while, but she already knew the answer. The only thing in the apartment that was hers were the rationed breakfast bars. She walked over to the cupboard where she kept them and made a mental note to take them with her when she left the following morning. There were only a few left, but they were her favorite, and she couldn’t bear to leave them behind.
She thought about playing a puzzle to pass the time, then realized that without a school tablet, her saved games wouldn’t be available to her in the new living quarters. Reaching a new high score now seemed fruitless and took the fun out of the puzzles. With nothing else to do, she decided to prepare herself for sleep. The sooner the next day came, the sooner a new world would open to her. She turned the sofa into a bed and lay down for what would be her last night’s sleep in the apartment that had been home to her for so long.
***
The next morning, Freya awoke and stepped into the shower. Realizing there was still more water available to be used, she took her time. The hot water felt amazing, and she figured she might as well use up her rations, since they would most likely be reset to default in her new apartment. She took extra time to lather her hair, enjoying the steam that rose in the small room. When a buzzer went off, she knew she had only one minute to finish her washing. How very nice of them, she thought, trying to quickly rinse the suds out, resetting my water rations in my apartment, when I haven’t even left yet.
Feeling a little aggravated, she stood in the shower and waited for the water to automatically shut off, wanting to take advantage of every single drop she was entitled to. Knowing the apartment had already been reset, she felt no sense of belonging or attachment to the place anymore. She knew once she opened the door and stepped out, that door would not open again for her when she palmed the scanner, but she was almost happy to leave the place behind. The apartment had no loyalty to her, and the feeling was becoming mutual.
As instructed, Freya dressed in her free time wear, securely braided her hair, and went to the desk to put the extra breakfast bars in her pockets. She turned and looked at the apartment one last time, then opened the door to leave.
“All finished now, dear?” asked a woman with a trolley full of uniforms and cleaning supplies.
“Yes,” said Freya, moving over to let the cleaning lady past her. She watched for a moment as the door slowly closed. Before it did, she saw the woman walk over to the closet to remove the uniforms, the ones Freya had worn every day. Even after the door latched, curiosity got the better of her. She knew she should just go, but she had to know if she was, in fact, locked out of the apartment. Feeling a little apprehensive it would set off and alarm, she placed her palm on the scanner. There was nothing—no alarm, no warning, no rejection, and no access. The device simply did not recognize her anymore, even after just over four years of calling this space home.
Freya went to the elevator and looked at the scanner, not quite sure what would happen when she tried to use it. She took a deep breath and placed her hand over it. The elevator opened, and the lift carried her to the underground walkway. She stepped out and pressed the first security button she saw. To her surprise, no Security personnel answered. The automated voice came on to verify who she was, and red lights illuminated on the wall, without any further instructions.
Freya walked for what she thought was a very long while, not recognizing any of the paths laid out before her until she turned a certain corner. She had walked that particular path once before, in her departure from her parental home, so she knew she was nearing the underground train. At the end of the lit path, she saw a scanner standing before a gate, so she walked over to the device and palmed it.
“Freya 117, verified. Please proceed to Train Four. Expected wait time is twenty-four minutes,” said the automated voice.
The gate slid open, and she walked through to the other side. There was a general waiting area, furnished with benches, and a few other citizens occupied some of them. She was looking around for a bench to sit on when a train rolled up on the platform. People began to get up and walk toward it, forming a line. Each person palmed the scanner before they boarded. Not sure what else to do, Freya followed the other passengers and got in line. After the fourth person boarded, the fifth one tried to scan in, and the automated system came on with a jolt. Red lights flashed all around them, and the door to the train slid shut.
“Rand 414, you are expected on Train Four. Proceed to the waiting area. Your expected wait time is twenty-two minutes.”
The red lights shut off, and the door to the train slid open again.
The male stepped out of line, his face red with embarrassment. He muttered something Freya couldn’t quite hear, then took a seat on one of the benches. It was then Freya realized her mistake: She had not paid much attention when the automated system told her what train to take, and she hadn’t expected there to be more than one. She did remember it mentioning a twenty-some-minute wait time, so she slowly walked over to
the bench area, hoping no one would notice she had almost made the same humiliating error.
Freya sat on the bench and looked around. A growl of her stomach reminded her she was hungry, so she pulled out a breakfast bar and ate it while watching the clock on the wall. The train pulled up exactly when expected.
When it was Freya’s turn to scan in, her hand trembled slightly; she hoped she was in line for the right train this time. The scanner momentarily flashed green, which she took as a sign of acceptance to board. She stepped inside and looked around for a place to sit. There were around thirty seats on the train, all crammed into one compartment, and it was much smaller than the one she had taken from her parents’ home.
She opted for a seat by the window and patiently waited for the train to leave. She stared out the window as they traveled, though she knew that was somewhat silly, considering that all she could see was the wall of the underground tunnel. When the train came to a stop, Freya looked around in confusion, wondering if she was supposed to get off or stay on. No one else in the compartment got up to leave, so she figured it was best to stay put. A few other passengers boarded, and the train continued on its way. She looked around for a clock but could not find one. She felt as though the train had traveled quite far, but she was beginning to wonder just where her destination was.
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