A life led by vow is a life animated or inspired by vow, not one that is watched, scolded, or consoled by vow. These verbs create a separation between the person and the vow. The simple phrase “living by vow” emphasizes that the person and the vow are one. Our life is itself a vow.
D. T. SUZUKI’S VOW
The Japanese translator of Living by Zen, Sōhaku Kobori, wrote about a conversation he had with Suzuki when he was young. Kobori asked a question that had popped into his mind: “What is your kenshō?” In Rinzai Zen, kenshō means enlightenment. Suzuki replied, “Well, my kenshō is shujō mu hen sei gan do.”14 The Japanese expression means “Living beings are numberless; I vow to save them.” That was his enlightenment. I was surprised when I first read this conversation, but I now believe Suzuki was a real bodhisattva. His many books in English have introduced Zen around the world. He worked continuously until he died at the age of ninety-six. The basis of his effort was the vow “Sentient beings are numberless; I vow to save them.” In this respect there is no distinction between Rinzai and Sōtō. We are all Buddhists or bodhisattvas. Zen in the West began with D. T. Suzuki’s bodhisattva vow, just as Buddhism began with the Buddha’s vow.
In his writings Suzuki elaborated on the bodhisattva vow:
Let me remark … that “vow” is not a very appropriate term to express the meaning of the Sanskrit pranidhāna. Pranidhāna is a strong wish, aspiration, prayer, or an inflexible determination to carry out one’s will even through an infinite series of rebirths. Buddhists have such a supreme belief in the power of will or spirit that, whatever material limitations, the will is sure to triumph over them and gain its final aim. So, every Bodhisattva is considered to have his own share in the work of universal salvation.15
Suzuki’s kenshō was his strong determination and vow to help liberate all living beings from a delusive way of life. He carried out this vow till death.
UCHIYAMA ROSHI AND VOW
Uchiyama Roshi placed great emphasis on living by vow. Although we didn’t chant much at Antaiji, before and after each of his lectures we chanted the four bodhisattva vows verse instead of the “Verse for Opening the Sutra.” In fact, the bodhisattva vows verse was the only verse we regularly chanted in our practice life at Antaiji. Uchiyama Roshi felt that the vows were essential to our practice. He writes:
A classic Mahāyāna text says, “The true mind of every sentient being itself teaches and leads each sentient being. This is the vow of Buddha.” Vow is not a special speculative approach to something outside us. The true mind of sentient beings—that is, universal self—itself is vow. Thus, when we consider universal self from the vantage point of the personal self, we realize that we cannot live without vow.16
As human beings living at the intersection of the universal self and the ego-centered self, we cannot live without being led by vow as the direction of our lives. Uchiyama Roshi took two personal vows based on the four general bodhisattva vows. One was to study the truth of life from not only Zen or Buddhism but also other spiritual traditions, to digest it through his own way of life, and to share it through his writings with Japanese and Westerners alike. His other vow was to produce determined practitioners of zazen who are thoroughly settled in the life of zazen practice.
Uchiyama Roshi often used the expression ichiza nigyō sanshin. The first word, ichiza, means “one sitting,” referring, of course, to our practice of zazen. Nigyō means “two practices,” vow and repentance. Sanshin, “three minds,” refers to three mental attitudes described by Dōgen Zenji: joyful mind, parental mind, and magnanimous mind. “One sitting,” Uchiyama Roshi says, is the center of our zazen practice. By “one sitting” he doesn’t mean one of many. In this context “one” means absolute. In the chapter of Shōbōgenzō titled “Zammai ō zammai,” Dōgen Zenji writes:
That which directly goes beyond the whole world is kekkafuza (full-lotus sitting). It is what is most venerable in the house of the buddhas and ancestors. That which kicks away the heads of non-Buddhists and demons and enables us to be inhabitants of the innermost room of the house of the buddhas and ancestors is kekkafuza. Only this practice transcends the pinnacle of the buddhas and ancestors. Therefore, the buddhas and ancestors have been practicing zazen alone, without pursuing anything else.17
This is the meaning of “one sitting.”
According to Dōgen Zenji, our sitting is not part of our practice, but rather other activities are part of our zazen. This is what is meant by the phrase “our zazen is absolute.” This is a very important point. In Bendōwa, Dōgen Zenji said, “Even if only one person sits for a short time, because this zazen is one with all existence and completely permeates all time, it performs everlasting Buddha guidance within the inexhaustible dharma world in the past, present, and future.”18 In this sense, sitting is absolute. This means that we become awakened to the reality that we are one with all beings, all times, and all space. This too is the meaning of “one sitting.”
According to Uchiyama Roshi zazen has two aspects. One is vow and the other is repentance. In this context “aspect” doesn’t mean that there are two parts to our zazen. It means that the whole of sitting is the practice of vow and, at the same time, the practice of repentance. Whether or not we aware of it, we are living out the reality of life. Unfortunately, we lose sight of this reality. Our life is like a hand. When we see it as a hand, there is no distinction between the fingers. But when we see it as a collection of fingers, each finger is independent and has its own name and characteristics. Each has a unique shape and function. They can act independently and are not interchangeable.
In the same way, human beings are individuals. If we cut off a finger, it can’t function as a finger anymore. A finger always works with other fingers. This is the reality of human life as well, but we often forget and think of ourselves only as individuals. This is a fundamental delusion for us. We have to wake up to the reality that we can be a finger only in relationship to other fingers working as one hand. The hand can be a family, a sangha, a society, or the whole universe. Yet if we think of this community as an entity in itself, it can become just another, bigger ego. We shouldn’t consider either the hand or the finger to be a separate, independent thing. Both are like a bubble. The bubble doesn’t exist as a separate thing, but only as a condition of water and air: it is air trapped inside a film of water. But we can’t deny that the bubble exists. The bubble is there. “Bubble” is just a name for a condition of air trapped in water. So we can say neither that the bubble doesn’t exist nor that the bubble exists independently. Air and water are themselves the same in that they are merely collections of atoms. In the same way, atoms are aggregates of even smaller particles.
Although this is the reality of our life, we are almost always unaware of it. We think of this person which is ourself as most important, as the center of the universe. We need to return to the reality that exists before egocentricity arises, before the separation of this body and mind from the rest of the world. This is what Uchiyama Roshi meant when he said we are living at the intersection of the universal self and the ego-centered self.
To vow to save all beings doesn’t mean that we believe that we have the power to help all those who are in trouble. Imagining that were so would truly be quite arrogant. To save all beings means to be one with all beings. We cannot become one with others by means of our individual efforts. But we can wake up to the reality that from the beginning we are one with all beings. That is why we study the obstacles that prevent us from seeing this reality. That is how we become free from delusion. To become free from delusion, we have to study the Buddha’s teachings. Reality itself is also a teaching. All beings in this universe—trees, leaves, and animals—teach us to awaken to the reality that is impermanent and egoless. We are not sensitive enough to hear this teaching without effort, so we must actively listen and study. In our practice together, we vow to attain the Buddha’s Way, the Buddha’s enlightenment, and to be one with all beings. As the Buddha said in the Lot
us Sutra, “But now this threefold world is all my domain, and the living beings in it are all my children.”19 That is the Buddha’s attitude, and we vow to attain such an attitude. We know it’s almost impossible, but we vow to do so.
Each of the four bodhisattva vows is a kind of a paradox or contradiction. It is impossible to accomplish or completely achieve the vows. Since we are working at something infinite and absolute, it’s important to reflect on the fact that we can never accomplish it. We cannot be perfect. This awakening to our own imperfection is repentance.
In Buddhism repentance does not mean saying “I’m sorry” because of some mistake I have made. That kind of repentance is relevant, but as Buddhists repentance means awareness of our imperfections and limitations. Vow and repentance are two kinds of energy that enable us to continue our practice. Zazen is itself the practice of vow. Zazen is itself the practice of repentance.
When we sit, we face the absolute, the infinite, and we let go of thought. This means that we don’t judge things by our own yardsticks, but instead we are measured against the absolute. That is our practice of vow and repentance. Facing the infinite or absolute, we are really nothing. No matter how long we practice zazen, we cannot be proud of what we have accomplished. At the same time, we don’t need to feel guilty or inadequate because we cannot practice enough, or because we cannot help others so much. No matter how great or small our accomplishments, they are all the same compared to the infinite. The important point is that even if it is only a small thing, we just do it. We don’t need a fancy way to attain perfect enlightenment or a means to help all living beings. Just sit a little more, or help others a little more. We should be down to earth. This is our practice.
THE THREE MINDS
As we have seen, our practice of zazen has two aspects. One is vow, to resolve to take one more step ahead. The other is repentance, to be aware of our imperfection. This zazen has to be applied to our day-to-day lives. According to Dōgen Zenji, the attitude we should maintain toward the things we encounter in our everyday lives is “three minds.” He discusses this in “Tenzokyōkun” (Instructions to the Cook). In this text, he talks about the attitude the person who is in charge of cooking in the monastery must have. Of course, he is recommending this for all people who are working as a community. Three kinds of mind are mentioned in the final part of “Tenzokyōkun.”
Joyful Mind
On all occasions when the temple administrators, heads of monastic departments, and the tenzo are engaged in their work, they should maintain joyful mind, nurturing mind, and magnanimous mind. What I call joyful mind is the happy heart. You must reflect that if you were born in heaven you would cling to ceaseless bliss and not give rise to Way-seeking mind.20
Heaven is the realm in samsara in which people’s desires are all fulfilled; only pleasure and happiness remain. There is no suffering. But if we don’t encounter some hardship or difficulty, we don’t arouse bodhimind. We won’t seek after the Way when our life is full of happiness and joy. Heaven is not a good place to practice.
This would not be conducive to practice. What’s more, how could you prepare food to offer to the three jewels? Among the ten thousand dharmas, the most honored are the three jewels. Most excellent are the three jewels. Neither the lord of heaven nor a wheel-turning king can compare to them. The Zen’en Shingi says, “Respected by society, though peacefully apart, the sangha is most pure and unfabricated.”21
The Zen’en Shingi is a collection of regulations for monastic life in the Chinese Zen tradition. It recommends that the community of Buddhist practitioners should be pure and unfabricated. Here “unfabricated” is a translation of mui, which can mean “nondoing,” or “nonaction.” In this context it means free of artifice. The Buddhist sangha or community is a place where people can escape from artificial ways of thinking and return to reality. This passage means that the sangha should be pure and free from attachment, delusion, and egocentricity.
The great importance of the Buddhist sangha isn’t of course restricted to the Zen center as an institution. If we think of “sangha” as referring to a specific group of Buddhists, it becomes a sort of group ego. We should see sangha as more inclusive. The community of people living in this area is a sangha. This country, the community of all countries, and the society of all human beings should also be considered sanghas. Anywhere we go to return to reality or live according to reality is a sangha and is therefore most precious.
Dōgen remarks further, “Now I have the fortune to be born a human being and prepare food to be received by the three jewels. Is this not a great karmic affinity? We must be very happy about this.” His expression “great karmic affinity” is a translation of dai innen. Here innen means the causes and conditions that enable us to practice and participate in a sangha. The conditions cannot be taken for granted:
Consider that if you were born in the realms of hell, hungry ghosts, animals, fighting gods, or others of the eight difficult births, even if you desired refuge within the sangha’s power, you would never actually be able to prepare pure food to offer the Three Treasures. Because of suffering in these painful circumstances your body and mind would be fettered. However, in the present life you have already done this [cooking], so you should enjoy this life and this body resulting from incalculable ages of worthy activity. This merit can never fade.22
The sangha has power because in community we encourage one another to practice in the Buddha’s Way. When we can work as a tenzo or in any other position to support others’ practice we should appreciate this good fortune.
Furthermore, “You should engage in and carry out this work with the vow to include one thousand or ten thousand lives in one day or one time.” Here he is alluding to the oneness of this moment, this day, and all eternity. As far as our attitude is concerned, eternity and this moment are one. This means that what we do this moment is not a step to the next stage. We cook not to feed people but to cook. When we cook, cooking itself should be our practice. It should not be preparation for something else. Cooking is in itself a perfect action if it is cooking just for the sake of cooking. When the food is ready, just offer it. Offering is not the result of cooking as preparation. Offering is just offering. Eating is just eating. Each moment is perfect in itself, not a step to the next one. Each moment is one with eternity. This is the attitude we should maintain.
The same is true of zazen. When we sit in this posture, we are one with all beings, all time, and all space. It’s all very dynamic, not limited to one single person or one moment of work. Even though we and our work are small, they are connected with the whole universe. When we are without a limited attitude or purpose, our work has no limits.
“This will allow you to unite with these virtuous karmic causes for ten million lives,” says Dōgen Zenji. “The mind that has fully contemplated such fortune is joyful mind.” This positive attitude we can sustain even in hard times. As a tenzo, if we don’t have fancy ingredients, we just work with what we have. Dōgen Zenji uses the expression “Pick a single blade of grass and erect a sanctuary for the jewel king; enter a single atom and turn the great wheel of the teaching.”23 We pick up just one small piece of bread and build the loftiest of the Buddha’s temples. That’s our practice.
Whatever we accomplish, it cannot be just for ourselves. “Truly, even if you become a virtuous wheel-turning king but do not make food to offer the Three Treasures, after all there is no benefit. It would only be like a splash of water, a bubble, or a flickering flame.” If we do things for our private gain or personal benefit, then no matter how hard we work, no matter how much we achieve, it will come to an end. Instead we dedicate our work to all beings. That is our attitude toward work and toward other people. That is joyful mind.
Parental Mind
The second aspect of sanshin is nurturing or parental mind. “As for what is called nurturing mind,” Dōgen continues, “it is the mind of mothers and fathers. For example, it is considering the Three Treasures in the way that
a mother and father think of their only child.” We try to care for the Three Treasures, the Buddha, Dharma, and Sangha, as if they were our only child. It is especially important to have this attitude when we practice in a community. The attitude of parents is to take care of others. When we live together, caring and being cared for are the same. The reality of what is happening is the same. The inner attitude of the caregiver, however, is very different from that of the one who expects to be cared for. This difference determines the quality of the community. A place where people want to be taken care of is very different from a place where people care for others. We should understand that this small difference in our inner attitude has very large effects on the world around us.
Even impoverished, destitute people firmly love and raise an only child. What kind of determination is this? Other people cannot know it until they actually become mothers and fathers. Parents earnestly consider their child’s growth without concern for their own wealth or poverty. They do not care if they are cold or hot but give their child covering or shade. In parents’ thoughtfulness there is this intensity. People who have aroused this mind comprehended it well. Only people who are familiar with this mind are truly awake to it.24
When we are small, we are not capable. We can’t survive without being taken care of by our parents or society. We should be grateful for the support and help we receive from our parents and others. When we become mature enough, we should take care of things around us, the way parents take care of their children. When you have this attitude you understand what it is.
Living by Vow Page 5
