“If you wish to make repentance, / sit in upright posture and be mindful of the true reality”: To be bodhisattvas, we have to be free from the hindrance of even our good deeds. To do that, we just sit and try to be mindful of the reality of our life. To be mindful of true reality does not mean thinking about reality. When we sit in the zazen posture, we keep our body straight and breathe quietly through our nose, smoothly and deeply, feeling the air as it fills our chest. We let go of thoughts. Whatever comes up in our mind, we just let it go. We don’t hide anything, even negative feelings or stupid thoughts, even thoughts about the Buddha’s teaching. We just let them come up and go away. Repeatedly we return to zazen, to our posture and breathing.
In this practice we are mindful of true reality that exists independent of our thoughts. To be mindful means to settle down right now, right here, without seeking after or escaping from anything. We refrain from either affirming or negating anything. We accept everything as it is, as the reality of our own life. In this sitting and letting go, true reality manifests itself. We can become intimate with ourselves as a whole. In this way we can be free from the egocentricity that makes us do “good” things. In other words, we do not become attached to what we think is good, meaningful, or important according to our own system of values.
“All misdemeanors, like frost and dew, / are melted away in the sun of wisdom”: This is true formless repentance, in which we liberate ourselves even from Buddhist teachings. This is what Linji (Rinzai) meant when he said that if you meet the Buddha you should kill the Buddha. Dōgen Zenji said that sitting Buddha is killing Buddha. We see the reality of things with ever-fresh eyes, unclouded by even our good will. We are not caught in one particular place. We don’t rely on anything inside or outside ourselves.
If we did something good yesterday, we should forget it and face what confronts us today. What we did yesterday is no longer real. We cannot be proud of what we did in the past or think we are a great person because we did such and such. Nor should we be caught up in our mistakes. We let go of them and start again. We start right from this posture in silence, from the ever-fresh life force that is free from any defilement. Moment by moment, we start again and again. This is not where our human evaluation and discrimination works. This is true repentance.
A Japanese Sōtō Zen master, Banjin Dōtan (1698–1775), comments on this verse in his Zenkai-shō (Comments on Zen Precepts):
The essence of repentance is that delusion and enlightenment, or living beings and buddhas, are one. Because of this, a person who practices repentance is endowed with all virtue. We usually think that delusive thoughts and true reality are separate and distinct, as an owner and that which is owned. When we are completely liberated, we see that there is no person who possesses delusions nor are there delusions that are possessed. This is the true path of Buddha Dharma. We should not understand this verse to mean that we have to get rid of delusive thoughts by sitting upright and being mindful of the true reality. Repentance is another name for the Three Treasures. To repent is to take refuge in the Three Treasures. When the dharma of repentance is carried out, it completely includes the three refuges and the threefold pure precepts. Repentance, the three refuges, and the threefold pure precepts are not apart from falsehood caused by delusions. We are, however, able to attain liberation within delusions. We could say that before delusions leave, true reality has arrived. This is what is meant by the expression “Before the donkey leaves, the horse has arrived.” We should learn that repentance is nothing other than the Dharma, the practice of the Buddha’s awakening.36
Banjin Dōtan says that to awaken to the reality that exists prior to the separation between delusion and enlightenment, between living beings and buddhas, is the essence of repentance. Because of awakening, a person who practices the repentance of sitting in upright posture in zazen is endowed with all virtues of the Buddha, the reality of life.
We usually think that delusive thoughts or desires are incompatible with the enlightenment of true reality. We believe that in order to attain enlightenment, we have to eliminate delusions. Banjin Dōtan, however, says that when we are completely liberated, we see that there is no one who possesses delusions, nor are there any delusions that are possessed. When we are sitting in zazen and letting go of thoughts, we are completely liberated. We see that both persons and delusions are without substance. This is the emptiness of reality, the true path of Buddha Dharma.
Our practice is not a means to get rid of delusive thoughts. Being mindful of true reality is not a method to eliminate delusions. In fact, when we sit in zazen, we sit squarely within the reality before the separation of delusion and enlightenment. We usually think of ourselves as deluded human beings and of buddhas as enlightened beings. We imagine that our practice is a method to transform a deluded being into an enlightened one by removing delusion. This idea is itself dualistic and contrary to the reality before separation.
So should we give up practice and pursue our delusions? No, what we must do is sit in zazen and let go of all dualistic ideas. In doing so, true reality manifests itself. Delusion and enlightenment are both here. Neither is negated or affirmed; neither is grasped. We sit on the ground of letting go. This is the meaning of Dōgen Zenji’s expression “Practice and enlightenment are one.” There is no state to be attained other than our practice of letting go. We practice within delusions and manifest enlightenment through sitting practice and day-to-day activities based on zazen. These practices enable us to settle our whole existence on that ground.
Banjin Dōtan also said that repentance is itself the Three Treasures. When we really repent in zazen and let go of thoughts, we take refuge in the Buddha, Dharma, and Sangha. Repentance in Buddhism is not something negative. It is a very positive activity through which we become true Buddhists. Our practice doesn’t make us perfect or holy people. In a sense, practice means giving up trying to become perfect; it means realizing our imperfect nature. We accept even our delusions and take care of them as if they were as precious as our children. If we ignore our delusions (or our children), they can do great harm. When we take good care of them, they can be quieted. We can be liberated within delusions only if we face and care for them. If we don’t, they become an impregnable barrier. There is a path of liberation within delusions and suffering. When we see reality clearly, we can see delusions as just delusion.
“We could say that before delusions leave, true reality has arrived. This is what is meant by the expression ‘Before the donkey leaves, the horse has arrived,’” writes Banjin Dōtan. Donkeys do not run fast, and we usually consider them lazy and foolish. We think a horse is better than a donkey. But this expression says that before the donkey (a deluded human being) leaves, the horse (true reality) has arrived. This means that right within this moment, our life force, this body and mind, both donkey and horse, are present, and we don’t need to hit the donkey to force it to go. We should not, however, mistake the donkey for the horse. Taking good care of the donkey is our practice. Within this practice is the horse. We can find egocentricity deep inside our good deeds. But this doesn’t mean we should carry out good deeds until we have completely eliminated our egocentricity. We strive to practice good and keep awakening to delusions, even those in our benevolent deeds. If we practice in this way we cannot avoid repentance. This formless, true repentance is in fact our zazen.
I think this repentance is essential for modern human beings because we have such powerful technologies. We can kill all the living beings on the earth. Most of the major problems we face today are a result of human activities. They are not caused by bad, foolish, or cruel people. Wars, ecological destruction, and so on have been caused by sincere, brilliant people under the banners of justice, liberty, human welfare, and national prosperity. These people are often respected as great leaders. Many religions cause problems by encouraging us to cling to doctrines and beliefs. We have to become aware of our self-delusion and clinging even while we try to accomplish good. Only in t
his way can we become free from the defilements caused by performing good deeds with imperfect motives. This is the true meaning of repentance.
THE ENGLISH TRANSLATION of the verse of the Triple Treasure in the MZMC sutra book is:
I take refuge in the Buddha, vowing with all sentient beings, acquiring the Great Way, awakening the unsurpassable mind.
I take refuge in the Dharma, vowing with all sentient beings, deeply entering the teaching, wisdom like the sea.
I take refuge in the Sangha, vowing with all sentient beings, bringing harmony to all, completely, without hindrance.37
When we become Buddhists, we first make repentance and take refuge in the Three Treasures of Buddhism: the Buddha, Dharma, and Sangha. These refuges are the first three of the sixteen precepts we receive in the Japanese Sōtō Zen tradition established by Dōgen Zenji. Without these three there is no Buddhism. Shakyamuni Buddha, born in India about twenty-five hundred years ago, is our original teacher. He awakened to the reality of our life. Both his teachings about this reality and the reality itself are called Dharma. Sangha is the community of people who study the Buddha’s teaching and follow his way of life. His first students were the five monks who had practiced with him before his enlightenment. They understood, became his disciples, and established the first sangha. That was the birth of Buddhism. From the very beginning, the Buddha as teacher, the Dharma as teaching, and the Sangha as community have been the essential elements of Buddhism.
TAKING REFUGE IN THE BUDDHA
When we become Buddhists, we vow to take refuge in the Buddha, the Dharma, and the Sangha. When we accept the Buddha’s teaching as a student of the Buddha, we make this vow with all sentient beings. It would be better to translate this as “all living beings.’ The original word in Japanese is shujō. Shu means “many’ or “various”; jō means “life” or “living beings.” The next phrase, taige taidō, or “acquiring the Great Way,” is an interesting expression. Tai means “body” and ge means “to understand,” so this can be translated as “understanding with the body.” We have to understand the Great Way with our bodies. The Buddha’s teaching is not something we can understand merely with our intellects; we have to practice it in our day-to-day lives. To understand and agree with his teaching is not enough. If we agree with his teaching, we have to carry it out, to live it. Taige means to embody, study, learn, or incorporate into our everyday lives. Taidō, or “Great Way,” means “awakening.” Here the “Way” is a translation of the Sanskrit word bodhi. This phrase means we have to embody the Great Awakening of the Buddha in our daily lives.
The first refuge includes the phrase “awakening the unsurpassable mind.” Unsurpassable mind (mujō-shin) is the same as bodhi-mind (bodai-shin). Both are abbreviations of the Sanskrit anuttarā-samyaksambodhi-citta. Anuttarā means “unsurpassable,” “supreme,” or “highest.” Bodhi means “awakening.” Mujō is the translation of anuttarā and bodai is the transliteration of bodhi. When we embody the Great Awakening, we awaken to the awakening mind. It’s a strange expression, but that is the reality. We awaken the awakening mind in order to wake up. We usually think we are awake except when we are asleep at night or napping, but actually we are usually asleep and dreaming. We imagine this world, our lives, and ourselves. We create dream-worlds and then believe that they are reality. And yet, they are only constructs of our mind. We create a story in which we are the hero or heroine. We think we are the center of the world, and all other people and things are resources to make a happy ending for our story. This is how we live in a dream. To awaken means to drop off body and mind, become free from dreaming and encounter reality. We try to act based on the reality that exists before we process the world through the intellect. Our intellection is based on our education and all our experiences since birth. But these experiences are a limited way of viewing the world, so we must wake up to reality.
Another aspect of “unsurpassable mind” is compassion for all beings. When we awake to the reality that has not yet been processed by our ego-centered mind, we cannot help having compassion for all beings. We realize that we live together with all beings, supported by networks of interconnection. We share air, water, and life by offering ourselves to each other. We live supported by all beings. In turn, we must support all other beings. This is compassion. We have to awaken to the reality that we live together as knots within Indra’s net. We do not and cannot live independently, as limited and conditioned individuals. This is the meaning of taking refuge in the Buddha.
TAKING REFUGE IN DHARMA
The next section begins, “I take refuge in the Dharma.” The Sanskrit word dharma has many meanings, but two are important here—the Buddha’s teaching and the reality of all beings. It continues, “Vowing with all sentient beings, deeply entering the teaching.” The original word for “the teaching” is kyō zō. Kyō means “sutra,” and zō means “warehouse,” “storehouse,” or “treasury.” Buildings in Buddhist temples where sutras or texts are stored called kyō zō. Jin nyū kyō zō means “deeply entering into the storehouse of sutras.” Another possible interpretation of this word kyō zō is “sutra piṭaka,” that is, one of the three “baskets” (piṭaka) of Buddhist scriptures: sutras, commentaries on the sutras (Abhidharma), and precepts (Vinaya). Either way, we vow to study the sutras thoroughly. In a chapter of Shōbōgenzō titled “Sansuikyō” (Mountains and Waters Sutra), Dōgen Zenji wrote, “These mountains and waters of the present are the manifestation of the Way of the ancient buddhas.” This implies that the reality of all beings is itself a sutra. Not only the mountains and waters but also the birds singing, the sun shining, and everything happening around us are sutras teaching us the reality of being. They teach impermanence and interdependence. Nothing lasts forever, everything is always changing, and there is no fixed ego or substance. All beings in the universe teach this reality, but we don’t listen; we don’t really see it. We think, “I want to do this” or “I wish to do that,” and we are blind to the reality of impermanence and interdependence. The phrase “deeply entering the teaching” doesn’t require that we read all the Buddhist texts. Although reading is an important part of entering the teaching, the deeper meaning is really to awaken to the reality before our eyes, the reality that we actually live.
The phrase “wisdom like the sea” refers to an unlimited and boundless perspective. We are like a frog in a well that can see only a small patch of sky. Our view is limited, yet we think we are the center of the world and know everything. We base our actions on our conditioned understanding, perceptions, and opinions. The beginning of wisdom is to see that our view is limited. The view we have at sea is wider than in a well. There is no limitation to something so vast and boundless. By studying the Buddha’s teaching we become free from our limited views and open ourselves to boundless reality. The meaning of taking refuge in the Dharma is that we value Dharma more than our own limited opinions and views based on our personal karma.
TAKING REFUGE IN SANGHA
The third vow begins, “I take refuge in the Sangha.” Sangha is a Sanskrit word meaning an association or union of people. In India at the time of the Buddha, cities were forming, and some people were freed from the daily labor of agriculture. Classes of merchants, craftsmen, warriors, and nobles arose. People established unions or associations called sanghas (or gaṇas). A sangha is a democratic community of members who share the same interests and status. The vow continues with “vowing with all sentient beings, bringing harmony to all.” The phrase “bringing harmony” is a translation of the Japanese word tori, which means “unify.” Buddhist sangha members are unified by the Dharma. To have a community instead of a collection of individuals, to have harmony, we need something that unifies. To make soup we chop the ingredients and put them in a pot, then add seasoning and cook it until the individual flavors blend to make one taste. Similarly, we need to cook ourselves and make these individuals into one community with one taste—the taste of Dharma. Harmony unifies a collection of individuals
into a community in which we can take refuge.
The next phrase is “completely, without hindrance.” With harmony and unity, there is no hindrance. When individuals think “me first,” endless problems and obstacles arise. But when we wake up to impermanence and egolessness, and share the life of this moment, there is no hindrance. Of course, there are still difficulties to overcome, but with harmony we can work on them. If we have discord, we cannot. This is the meaning of sangha and of taking refuge in the Three Treasures.
THE REASON FOR TAKING REFUGE
Shōbōgenzō is a collection of about ninety-five of Dōgen Zenji’s independent writings. One of the chapters is called “Taking Refuge in Buddha, Dharma, and Sangha” (Kie-buppōsōbō). Here he quotes a section from Kusharon (Abhidharmakośa bhāṣya), chapter 14, about why we take refuge in the Three Treasures. This text was originally written in India and translated into Chinese. The Indian text says, “Many people out of fear take refuge in the deities of mountains, forests, trees, gardens, shrines, and so on.”38 We take refuge in gods because of fear. We need shelter—in this case spiritual shelter—because we are weak and afraid. Human beings are not necessarily the strongest animals. We are not as big as elephants, as fast as cheetahs, or as strong as gorillas. All phenomenal elements, such as too much or too little rain, cause suffering in our lives. Full of fear and uncertainty, primitive people needed something to worship, to rely on. Even in civilized society it’s dangerous to rely on things outside of ourselves. Everything outside of us is uncertain, always changing and unreliable. We worship, pray to, or rely on this thing that we believe to be eternal and unchanging. This is one of the reasons we need religion. Buddhism, of course, is one of the religions. But the Buddha didn’t teach us to take refuge in a deity beyond this phenomenal world. He taught us to find refuge within this world, within ourselves. This is the basic teaching of the Buddha and a difference between Buddhism and other religions.
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