by Kristie Cook
I turned to him slowly and peeked up at him, fully expecting a Tate face; open mouth, droopy passion induced eyes and a tight neck from strain because he could never seem to control himself. I wondered if I should regret coming down to his room. Would he think it was an invitation? But as my eyes found his, I saw that he was himself. His lips held a smile, but it wasn’t cocky or flirty. It was sweet. He really just liked the idea of me in his space. And given by the apparent lack of guests, I couldn’t say I blamed him.
“Me, too,” I answered and smiled back. “Are you going to keep staying here?”
“I don’t see why not.”
“Um, maybe because the Horde and your evil-ex know where you live?” I spouted sarcastically and fisted my hands to my hips.
“She is not my ex,” he said smartly.
“Whatever, you know what I mean.”
“Uhuh, I do. That you are particularly intriguing when you’re jealous.”
“Well, it’s a little disconcerting … the whole a-goddess-wants-my-boyfriend thing.”
He laughed again and hooked his fingers in my front pockets to pull me to him.
“You are one cute human.” He tipped my chin with a crooked finger. “Did you not see the whole me-choosing-you-over-her thing,” he said mockingly.
I tried to scowl, tried to frown, bit my lip to stop the smile, but it won, hands down.
“Yeah, that was pretty sweet,” I agreed.
“Yeah. Now, let’s get you a clean shirt and get you home before I have to add ‘Pastor’ to my list of growing enemies.”
“Why does the Horde care if we’re together?” I asked as I took my shirt off when his back was turned to rummage through his dresser drawers. I held my shirt over my front. He turned and stumbled a little at seeing me that way, but held the shirt out as he turned back around.
I accepted the t-shirt he gave me and hoped that no one noticed my shirt was different at home.
“Well,” he cleared his throat, “what he said about polluting our race, he believes that. The Horde does. They are a group who takes matters into their own hands and places those of us that they deem a traitor into custody. And they kill humans who interfere with our kind or find out about us.”
“So, they’re like your council or police or something?” I asked as I pulled the shirt over my head and smoothed the front. Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. I smirked as he went on.
“No, not at all. We have no government, no council, no regulations, no laws. That would defeat the whole purpose in their eyes, though the hypocrisy is almost funny.” He turned his profile towards me. “Can I turn around now?”
“Yes, I’m decent. As decent as I can be wearing super hero turtles from the 90’s.”
He looked me over and smiled wistfully as he said, “I love that shirt.”
“I’ll make sure you get it back.”
“No problem. You’ll be with me anyway won’t you? I’ll just take it back if I want it.” He pulled me by my hands and sat me on the bed. “Now, see, they think mating is acceptable because, as I said, it’s all about control. They’ve never accepted nor understood a bonding and I’ve never personally met anyone who has been. But I knew it would be trouble, I just assumed we’d lay low and then avoid my kind at all cost. But Enoch and Angelina couldn’t make things easy for us, could they?” he spat angrily and clenched his fists on the bed between us. I covered my hand with his, smoothing the angry blue veins.
I waited for him to say something. I didn’t try to soothe him with empty words.
He continued, “We’re going to have to do a lot of pretending. A lot of … lying. A lot of trying to avoid my kind.”
“Are they going to be coming after us or something?”
“I don’t know if the Horde bought it or not. They’re very manipulative and sneaky. They may have just been playing us, but they took Angelina so … I don’t know. I just know that I can’t leave you alone. Not yet.”
“Eli,” I countered, “you can’t just sit outside my house every night, all night.”
“Of course I can, CB,” he replied almost smugly. “You can’t stop me, so don’t even try. I know I can’t come in, but I can at least watch out for you while you sleep.”
“But you’ll be … bored. You’ll get tired of me pretty quick that way,” I grumbled.
He scooted closer and put a hand around the front of my neck, using his thumb to tip up my chin as he said, “Have I not made my feelings for you clear?”
“Yes, but-“
“Nothing. Absolutely nothing is more important than you. Besides,” he pulled me closer and put an arm around my shoulder, “I like the night. It’s quiet. It’s easy to deal with. I’ve lived a very fast paced and reckless life and to be able to just sit and enjoy peace is a gift all its own. And sitting outside your window, knowing you’re safe inside, is just icing.”
“Ok,” I conceded, “if you must. But I don’t want you putting yourself in danger either.”
He nodded and chuckled a little. “Ok, CB. You got it.”
“So tell me about the bird. It’s immortal?” I asked, continuing my earlier question.
He shifted uncomfortably, pulling his arm from me and leaning his elbows on his knees. He fingered the barbed string on his wrist and avoided my gaze. I thought, that couldn’t be good. I leaned forward, too, and asked him the silent question with my eyes. He sighed and finally looked up to see me. “It’s Angelina’s bird.”
“What?” I asked and sat up.
“It’s Ange-“
“I heard you!” I almost yelled and he looked away again. I felt suddenly hysterical. Why would he have her bird if nothing went on and why wouldn’t he have told me about it? “Why do you have her bird?” I tried for calm.
“She abandoned it on one of her escapades to come and get me. She’s had that blasted bird for as long as I can remember. I’ve always hated it. She taught it to say all kinds of stupid things.” He looked back to me. “I know you think it proves me guilty of lying to you, but I haven’t. She left it, I don’t know why, but she did and I couldn’t just leave it there, too. Number one, it’s immortal as I said and number two, as badly as I don’t like the thing, it’s an animal. It doesn’t have to eat to survive, but it feels hunger and it was cruel to leave it there in that cave in California for all eternity, hungry and alone. Besides if a human had found it there’s no telling what they would’ve done with it.”
I stared at him in awe. Really? That’s why he wanted to hide all that? Because he thought I would assume he was lying?
“Eli-“
“I didn’t want you to think I had feelings for her still or that I was keeping the bird as some love trinket or reminder.”
“I wouldn’t-“
“In all honesty, it just makes me soft to keep it, but I couldn’t help it. I’ve had the bird for 21 years now and believe me, I have no love for that bird. It hasn’t spoken a word to me. I’m not sure what that’s about, but …” He looked back to me and his eyes pleaded with me. “Please forgive me. I meant to tell you, but it just snowballed and then my omission felt like a lie and then you met her and it seemed like it was too late to say anything then; that the evidence was too damning.”
“Eli, you’re nuts,” I said when I could finally get a word in.
“What?” he asked, completely confused.
“You really think that after everything that you said today and everything that happened to us at the park with Angelina that I would think you still have feelings for her?”
He smirked a ghost of a smile. “Well … I just didn’t want to hurt you.”
“I don’t care who the bird belongs to. It’s really sweet that you saved it, especially since you find it so revolting.”
He laughed. “Really? I thought you were going to throw some human hissy fit over this.”
“Well, it sucks that you didn’t tell me and it sucks even worse that you think I’d leave you over it or something, but I don’t care. It’s just a bird.”
&nb
sp; “It’s not just a bird,” he told me and took my hand to run this thumb over my wrist over and over. “He’s immortal. You didn’t think to ask me about it?”
“Honestly, Eli, I’m not sure I can even be surprised anymore at this point,” I answered and was caught off guard by how breathless I sounded.
I watched him continue to torture my wrist with his slow fluid skimming movements. He seemed completely engrossed in what he was doing. When I could take it now longer and goose bumps spread rapidly up my arm, that seemed to snap him back to the present. He turned his gaze to mine and smiled, in satisfaction as much as happiness.
He continued to smile as he spoke. “The bird has a spell on it. When Angelina got it in the 1700’s, she was dealing a lot with witches and sorcerers back then.”
“Witches and sorcerers?” I squeaked. “What do you mean?”
“I mean that I’m not the only nightmare out there.”
“There are other things,” I mused and nodded, breathing through bits and spurts of panic. “Like what?”
“Well,” he said slowly and pulled my hand to cradle it against his chest, “I’m not going to tell you. I want your dreams to be only good things. Well, and me, of course.”
“Eli,” I snapped, half because I was scared and half because I didn’t want him to spend the rest of our lives acting like we were opposite sides of the good-vs.-evil spectrum, “stop acting like you’re evil.”
“I am evil,” he insisted with a slight tightening of his jaw. “And no matter how tame you think I am, you’d do well to remember that.”
“Why?”
“So when I do wind up doing something in the future that you may not approve of, you won’t be so shocked about it.”
“Like what you did to that security guard at the club that night?” I asked softly.
He looked at me sharply before saying, “You noticed that?”
I nodded. “What did you do?”
“I just persuaded him to let you in.”
“How?”
“I’m not without my talents,” he growled in what sounded like frustration before combing his hands through his hair and leaning on his elbows to his knees once more. “I’m sorry. I immediately regretted it once I did it, but it was the only way to get you in. And I didn’t know you understood what I’d done for what it was.”
“You didn’t hurt him,” I said and thought back to that night. “He wasn’t scared, you just persuaded him.”
“Exactly. Persuading—making people think they want what we want—is another one of our tricks,” he muttered. “It’s so addictive and easy because it’s subtle. It’s so very easy to just plant a seed of what we want in their mind. I hadn’t done it in a long time, but that night I just … I wanted to spend time with you and it just happened,” he admitted and the shame of his words practically coated the air.
“Eli,” I turned his face to look at me, “I’ll help you. Do you understand?” He shook his head and scrunched his eyebrows. I knelt on the floor in between his knees and put my hands on his legs. “Ok, listen. Once, a long time ago, in my parent's marriage, my dad was having a hard time at work. We went through a rough patch and almost lost our house. He started drinking. For about a month, my dad was drunk almost every minute of every day when he was laid off from his job. Well, my mom let him try to work through everything, but eventually, she had to step in. She went on a rampage, going through the whole house and throwing away every bottle she could find, his cigarettes, everything. He followed her around and yelled at her as she did it, but he never touched her, never forced her to stop. Do you know why?”
He shook his head a ‘no’.
“Because he loved her. Because deep down, he wanted her to do it. He needed her help. He wasn’t strong enough to drop the shoe himself, but he was willing to let her do it for him. He trusted her and needed her and she knew it. It was the only time in their marriage where they had problems, and after that, they were practically inseparable. It was kind of gross actually,” I said remembering and smiled. “But my point is that I get it. You’re the protective type, you’re the big, bad Devourer.” He cracked his first smile and I felt my held breath release and relax in gratitude for it. “But even though I might need you to save me, a lot, I’ll always be here for you. I’d never let you lose yourself or go back to something you were before. I can save you if I have to and I'll fight with everything I have.” I pointed to our wrists where the string held tight. “I think I’ve proven that already.”
His breaths were loud and laced with strain. I didn’t know why, I thought he’d understand what I was trying to say. Then he pulled me up by my elbows, wrapping his arms around me completely and pressed his mouth to mine. He sighed a long and needed breath that seemed to relax even the tension in the air. I put my arms around his neck, for my own need to be held up as anything else. He was answering me, letting me know that he was grateful. And boy, was he being thorough. His hands pressed me and slid over me in caresses that were meant to show affection and devotion. That was all.
Once again, I felt safe in every way possible and it made me ache in my chest with gratitude.
It seemed like this was something he needed more than wanted to do, like he was being pulled to it without a will in it, so I let him ravish and devour me for quite a while before he finally pulled back, but not by much.
With his hand on my cheek and his rough breaths against my neck, he looked down at me almost as if embarrassed by his actions.
“Sorry,” he said, confirming my thoughts.
“Why would you be sorry for that?” I whispered and licked my lip to feel it plump and tender from his kisses.
“I just … I needed to feel the way you feel about me,” he admitted. “Nothing makes me feel more human, more capable of being good, more like I could possibly deserve something like this one day, than when I kiss you … and you kiss me back, completely of your own free will.”
I sighed. “I need you to stop being so self deprecating,” I said, going for firm and stern, but my mind was still reeling from what he said. He laughed and shook his head. “Eli,” I sighed his name, thinking of a way to make him see, “what you said was so … I’ve always wanted someone to feel that way about me. I feel the same way about you. I mean, without the human part,” he laughed again as I kept going, “but I was always a prize; a toy to be paraded around. When I’m with you, I feel like I know what my parents had was real. They loved each other, no matter what, no matter what demons came into their lives. I’d almost given up that that was possible anymore.”
“It’s not impossible, CB,” he said softly, sweeping a hand down my arm to twine his fingers with mine. “You’re the best intrusion that has ever invaded my life. I’ll be forever grateful that I found you.”
I never thought being called an intrusion would make me cry, but I was about to. I nodded to him, as it was all I could do, and he kissed my fingers. This was so much, so fast, but, gosh, did I need it. Despite what he said about his needing me, I needed him.
“Now,” he edged, sensing I wanted a subject change to stave off red, crying eyes all night, “you have more questions for me, right?”
“Yes.” I cleared my throat. “Ok, about the bird,” he grunted in annoyance, “you say he’s immortal. Did Angelina buy him that way or did she have him cursed after she bought him.”
“We’ll never know. She’s not very forthcoming.”
“But you say you found the bird in a cave in California?”
“It was my cave,” he said carefully and never removed his eyes from mine.
“Your cave,” I repeated. “Then how did the bird get there?”
He sighed and squeezed my fingers a bit, stalling. I quirked a brow at him. He ventured on.
“Angelina brought the bird with her everywhere. She and Enoch were really relentless in their efforts to find me. Sometimes, it was worth it to exchange amenities for comfort, if it meant that I could not see them for longer.”
�
�Ah. So you stayed in caves and places where they wouldn’t think to look for you,” I realized.
“Yes. But they always found me eventually.”
“So …”I said, finally getting what he was saying. “Angelina was in the cave with you.”
Chapter Sixteen
“Yeah,” he answered gruffly and looked up to me. “She left the bird there once when she went to come after me. I went back to the cave after some time and saw that she had abandoned it. She’s never tried to take it back since.” He took a deep breath. “I’ll be honest, you deserve that. I never brought it up before because there was never a reason to, but she would find me and I would pretend with her sometimes.”
“Pretend what?” I asked and it came out shrill. I cleared my throat.
“Pretend to be what she wanted,” he confessed. I tensed and his arms around me tightened a bit to keep me there.
“But you told me you were never with her,” I accused.
“I wasn’t. Never. I would never lie to you. She’d show up and there was no way to leave unless I bolted and she’d be too close behind. I had to distract her so I could catch her off guard and get a head start. So, sometimes … I would act like I was surrendering. I’d let her kiss me. She was so gullible, she believed that I had caved. She’d let her guard down and when she ran errands or went to feed, I’d run, leaving everything behind.”
“No wonder she follows you, Eli,” I chastised softly, “after you led her on like that.”
“I didn’t lead her on. I tried to just leave, I tried to tell her the truth—that there was absolutely no future for us—but she never gave in. I was losing my mind. Can you imagine running from someone for hundreds of years as they chased you and ruined your life over and over again?” He huffed a surprised breath. “I can’t believe you’re taking her side anyway.”
“I’m not taking her side. I just know how girls think.”
“Not this girl,” he assured me. “We’re talking about ‘Psycho’ meets ‘The Babysitter’,” he explained, making me snicker. He pulled my face up to look at him closely. “You don’t ever have to worry about her and me. There’s no history there, just bad memories.”
