by Diana Gardin
“So,” she asks, her lips curving into a small smile. “You still have feelings for this Jeremy guy.”
My mouth falls slack. “That’s where you’re going to focus first, after everything I just told you?”
She shrugs. “First things first. Are you still in love with him?”
I throw my hands up helplessly before burying my face in my hands and barking out a laugh. “I don’t know if I can say that, Macy. The love we had in high school…that was real. He was my favorite person in the whole world. We never wanted to be apart. He picked me up for school each morning and I sat front row at each and every one of his football games. We were…God, Macy. A love like that? I thought it’d last forever.
“Losing him the way I did broke my heart in half. It was like I left the other part behind, with Jeremy. Whether he knew it or not. But as I began to raise Decker, I realized that our high school relationship was so different from what we needed to be as parents. To make that kind of relationship work. I loved him and he loved me. Madly. Deeply. But it had nothing to do with sticking it out, having a kid together, living real life. But the pull I have for him now is a different animal. It’s like taking that teenage attraction and magnifying it tenfold. And then adding adult emotions and the fact that we have a son together…I can’t even describe how I feel. But there’s something there.”
Macy’s head bobs. “Oh, honey. There’s more than ‘something there.’ I saw it in your eyes the day I found you two standing in Olive’s driveway together. Maybe you’re not ready to admit it yet, but you love that man. And he loves you.”
Peeking through my fingers, I give her an anguished smile. “Well, if that’s true, how can I put him in the middle of my mess? Especially right as he learns he has a son? This should be a magical time for him and Decker. They should be getting to know each other, and Jeremy shouldn’t be having to protect me while he acclimates to life as a dad.”
She shakes her head, staring at me like I’ve suddenly grown an extra nose out of the side of my face. “When a man is in love…there’s nothing he’d rather be doing than protecting the woman who belongs to him. I’m guessing that with your ex-army security specialist, that feeling is magnified.”
I finger the balled-up tissues still in my hands. She was right about that. Jeremy seemed determined to make this situation better for me…to make sure I’m safe and protected. It’s why he’s insisting Decker and I move in with him. But how much of that is just him making sure his son is safe?
“I’m going to humor him. I’m packing up Decker and my stuff for now, and we’ll stay with Jeremy. At least until this issue has been resolved.” I sniffle, glancing at Macy.
Macy’s voice is low and her face is serious. “Does Decker know? Who Jeremy is?”
Shaking my head, I offer a small smile. “No, but he seems to adore Jeremy already. Not that either one of them has seen any negative aspects of their personalities yet. But they’ve bonded.”
“Living under the same roof is the best way to get it all out in the open.” Macy chuckles. “Jeremy will learn what it’s like to be a dad pretty quickly.”
A little while later, she walks me to the door and I call for Decker.
“We’ll still keep Decker after school, and you and Jeremy can come pick him up after work. And he’s welcome here any other time, too. You know that. But do you think there’s anything to worry about as far as safety is concerned when I have Decker with me?”
I shake my head. “I really don’t think so, Macy. The Night Eagle team is taking charge of this, and they’d never let anything happen. Plus, I’m the real target. You’ll be safe with the NES guys looking after everything.”
“I’m happy they’re involved. I want you to stay safe.”
I grab her into an impulsive hug. “I’m so thankful for you, Macy.”
She pats my shoulder with her slender hand. “I got your back, girl.”
Later that evening, I walk out into Jeremy’s backyard to find my son and his father throwing a football back and forth. Night’s little tail wiggles in excited anticipation.
A smile tugs on my lips. The thawing sensation building up inside of me can be blamed on the sight of them together, but the way that Jeremy is burrowing deeper into my heart has a lot to do with the way he is with our son. I watch as he praises Decker for catching a difficult pass, and then cover my laugh with my hand when Decker runs and attempts to tackle Jeremy to the ground after throwing him a perfect pass.
Jeremy plays along, laughing as he allows Decker to take him down, but I notice him protecting the little boy’s head as they both hit the ground. And my heart melts just a little bit more.
Jeremy looks up then, as if he senses my gaze on him, and when our eyes meet an invisible thread pulls taut between us. Whatever emotion is flooding out of him reaches inside me and grabs hold, squeezing me until I can barely breathe. It’s surreal, but that small moment tethers us together as surely as an actual knotted rope.
I watch them for a little longer, playing together and bonding over what is clearly a mutual love. Football. As much as I tried to avoid it, it’s here and Jeremy with it.
And I don’t mind nearly as much as I thought I would.
That night, after Decker’s in bed and Jeremy and I settle on the couch, I look over at him and take a sip of my wine.
Jeremy waits.
“We should tell him.” The statement bursts from my mouth like word vomit. “Shit,” I whisper.
Shocked at my own thought, I stare down at the burgundy liquid swirling around in my glass.
I know, in my heart, that Decker is ready to hear this news. I know that Jeremy’s ready to tell him. He’s been patient, spending time with his son and getting to know him over the past two days. We could wait weeks, but what good would it do? It’s only keeping them apart for longer than is necessary. Decker deserves the truth now, and Jeremy deserves the chance to stand in front of him as his father.
Jeremy’s hand plucks the wineglass from me, appearing in my vision so fast it startles me. Then he’s there, kneeling in front of me with both of my hands clasped in his. When I look into his eyes, they’re shining.
“Thank you.” His words are simple, but the expression he wears is anything but. It’s brimming with open emotion and untapped desire.
And, God help me, I want nothing more than to let him unleash that desire on me.
I hold his gaze, and my throat squeezes as my heart attempts to climb up into my mouth.
“Tomorrow. After we pick him up. We’ll tell him then.”
He grabs hold of me then, lifting me into his arms. I wrap my legs around his waist and melt against him, my lips pressing hungrily to his. He tugs my bottom lip into his mouth, sucking hard until a moan slides free from my throat.
“Take me upstairs.” It’s an order, my voice low and husky with everything I want to do to him so close at hand.
If you had asked me a year ago, a month ago, even a week ago about this moment, I would have told you there was no chance in hell it would ever happen. But now that I’m here with Jeremy, and the lies and deceit we’ve both been victim to are out in the open, all I want to do is pull him closer and closer. I want my son to know his father. I want to experience the passion I glimpse in his eyes, over and over again, know how it feels to be touched, loved, marked by this man. And most of all, I want to have my little family together for the first time, without threat of Wagner Horton hanging over us like a poised guillotine blade.
18
Jeremy
My hands want to be everywhere all at once. I don’t know if there’s ever been a time I’ve been this frantic about getting as close to a woman as possible. I want to take it slow, enjoy the feel of her against me, but I also want to sink inside her and I want that to happen now. In just the short time she’s been back in my life, she’s changed it forever. I’ll never be the man I was again, and I’m glad for it. I’m going to be so much better now. Because of Rayne and Deck.
&nbs
p; After carrying her upstairs and closing my bedroom door, I lay her on my bed and stare down at the picture of beauty before me. Her hair is splayed out all around her in waves of dark, her big eyes blinking up at me in the low lamplight.
She stares up at me, her expression vulnerable in a way that shreds me apart inside.
“I want you,” she says.
Goddamn. With those three little words, she owns me.
Ripping my shirt off over my head and falling down over her, I cover her body with mine. Our lips find each other, our tongues twisting and tangling in a furious dance. Her fingernails scrape fiery lines up my back, and my answering groan is lost somewhere inside her mouth.
A soft sigh escapes her, and I pull back to glance down. Pulling my brows together, I frown down at her.
“You okay?”
She brings a hand up, brushes my loose hair away from my face. She blinks once, twice, before opening her mouth to speak. When she does, her voice is low and husky. Sexy as fuck. My body is already in overdrive, but her voice does something to my insides, sending me over the edge.
“More than okay. Perfect.”
Her words affect me, causing a slow burn of need to start deep in my veins. I reach for the hem of her tank top and pull it over her head. Her bare breasts call out to me, so I dip my head and run my tongue along the plump roundness of one. Letting out a breath between her teeth, she lets her head drop back as her fingers dig deep into my hair. Pulling one peaked nipple into my mouth, I suck hard and am rewarded with Rayne’s answering gasp and the tightening of her hands in the strands of my hair.
She arches toward me as I use my teeth, then smooth my tongue over the sting. I switch to her other breast, fueled by the small sounds of pleasure she makes and she way she thrusts herself against me.
My voice is more abrupt than I mean it to be when I lift my head and stare down at her. “Turn around, Rayne.”
Her lips quirk into a sexy smile. “You realize I’ve never been with anyone else? Since you, I mean?”
Pride that I don’t deserve to feel fills me, threatening to lift me into the air. Closing my eyes, I exhale. “You know how that makes me feel? Ecstatic. Thrilled. And damn undeserving.”
“I’ve never wanted anyone but you, Jer.” The absolute truth in that statement shines out of her eyes like a lantern in the darkness.
I kiss her, and her fingers find the zipper on my jeans as I do.
I slide my jeans off, along with my boxers, and crawl behind her on the bed. Reaching around her, I find the button on her shorts and flick it open before unzipping and pulling them down her thighs. She wriggles free of them, kicking them to the floor and looks over her shoulder at me with a mischievous smirk
“Now what?” she asks.
Kneeling, I pull her body flush against mine. I swallow my groan as the warmth of her skin tempts the rock hard rigidity of mine. Her sweet-and-spicy floral scent overpowers me and I inhale deeply at her neck before trailing my lips from her ear down to her shoulder, planting a kiss on the soft skin. My hips flex, pushing against her ass, and her response is perfection, pushing back against me with a gentle but insistent force.
“God,” I groan against her neck. “You feel incredible, Rayne.”
Dropping her head back to rest on my shoulder, she sighs. “You make me feel incredible.”
Nibbling on her shoulder, I run my hands along her hips, up to her stomach, and cup her breasts. Testing their weight in my hands, I allow my index fingers to roam over the hardened tips. Rayne jerks in my arms, her breath coming faster as I continue to explore the sensitive peaks.
“That’s it, baby. Feel this…feel me.”
I let one hand continue to play while the other drops between her legs. Dragging a finger through her folds, I discover how slick she is, how wet and ready for me. Sucking in a breath, I try and steady the intake of air as I draw my finger to her pulsing clit.
Fuck me. I could come from the feel of her alone.
“Rayne.” My voice is rougher, harder than it should be, but fuck if I can help it. “I love how ready for me you are.”
She moans, bucking against my hips with her ass and a growl leaves me before I can stop it. My finger circles her clit slowly, teasing, before dipping inside her soaked heat.
“Oh, God, Jeremy. Please…” Her words come out in jerky gasps.
“I’ve got you, darlin’.” My finger pumps a slow and steady rhythm in and out of her and a second one joins the first, stretching her just a little bit farther.
Now Rayne’s pushing back against me in earnest, her gasps and moans growing louder and more needy with every thrust of my hands. She’s riding me hard, her body taking control as she chases after whatever feels good.
And I fucking love it.
I love seeing her like this, carefree and gorgeous. She’s always got something important on her mind, whether it’s Decker or the fucker who’s been stalking her, but right now she’s just letting go. With me. It’s a heady feeling, one that threatens to take over if I’m not careful.
“Tell me you want my cock inside you, Rayne.”
My demand surprises even me. I’m not the possessive type. Even when Rayne and I were together in high school, I knew she was with me and she wasn’t a social butterfly so I never had to go caveman. Everyone knew she was mine.
But now everything feels different. Now that I have her again I don’t want to lose her. I need her reassurance.
“Jeremy,” she pants. “I want your fucking cock inside me. Now.”
“Nightstand drawer,” I grind out. “Condom. Grab one for me.”
Crawling forward, and offering me a stellar view of her perfect ass in the process, she retrieves the condom, rips it open, and hands it back to me. I roll it on, and then position myself behind her once again.
Fisting myself in one hand, I drag the hard tip of me through her wetness before meeting her entrance with one deep thrust that has us both groaning with the sweet rightness of it.
Settling deep inside of her, I pause, closing my eyes and allowing myself to feel this moment. I’m going to savor every fucking second, because I know how damned lucky I am to be here with her like this.
She glances back behind her shoulder, her hair a sexy curtain of inky rain around her face. Her eyes are bright, her cheeks are flushed, and she looks like the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen.
“You okay?” she asks with a slight smile. She wiggles her ass for emphasis, and I bite my lip with a wince.
“Just…trying not to embarrass myself by coming in the first minute of being inside you. It’s hard, Rayne. Really fucking hard.”
An understanding sigh escapes her, and she nods. She sags a little and I wrap an arm around her to secure her tightly to me.
“Yeah…I get that.”
Finally under control, I begin to move. Pulling myself nearly out of her before thrusting back inside to the hilt, I flex my fingers against her hips hard enough to make a mark.
“Fuck. Perfection, baby. You’re perfection.”
She wraps her hands around my wrists like she needs to hold on for the ride, and I take that as my cue to pound into her in a relentless dance of pleasure and delicious, revel-in-the-moment pain. She rocks with me, crying out as our pace repeatedly strokes a spot inside of her that makes her unravel.
“Yes, baby. Let go.”
A fine sheen of sweat covers us both as I work to make her pleasure come first, and she works to contain herself underneath the pressure of her impending orgasm.
A few more thrusts of my hips and she comes apart in my arms, trembling and crying out my name with a ferocity that makes me want to pump my fist in the air.
I’ve been to hell and back more than once, but I’ve never felt as adrenaline-charged as I do right this second.
When she goes limp in my arms, I gently lay her on the bed, flipping her over so I can see her face. Her eyes are glazed and shining, her lip a glorious red from biting it, and she smiles lazily up at me.
“You’re not done yet, darlin’,” I warn, climbing over her and positioning myself to enter her again from a whole new angle.
Her smile grows as she grabs my ass and squeezes, bringing me closer. “I’m counting on it, Teague. I have high expectations for you.”
My brow lifts. “Oh, yeah? Why is that?”
Her eyes sparkle. “Well…that body, those tattoos, and the whole black ops soldier thing promises at least two orgasms.”
Narrowing my eyes, I swallow the bark of laughter that rumbles up from somewhere in my chest. “Baby, we’re going for at least three.”
Her fingernails dig into my ass as I plunge back inside her, but the sweet bite of pain is nothing compared to the ache starting to build inside me. There’s another ache there, too, in my chest. It’s more subtle and indicates that what I’m feeling for Rayne goes so far beyond the feelings a man usually has when he makes love to a woman. She’s crawled inside me, buried herself deep, and there’s no way I’m going to let her climb back out again.
This little family she’s given me has grown to mean everything to me in such a short time. But that’s how I know it’s real. Rayne and Decker are everything I didn’t even know I wanted, and they’re mine to protect, cherish, and love.
Love.
Suddenly overcome with emotion, I dip my head and take her mouth with mine, kissing her until my world is dizzy, spinning around me in circles I can’t even begin to control. I can feel her clenching around me, the tiny vibrations in her muscles kissing my cock, and her tiny warning cry lets me know that orgasm number two is in the books.
Pulling back, I stare down into her hazy eyes. Without stopping the slow drag and pull of our bodies, I make love to her face-to-face, staring into the bottomless blue eyes, promising her everything I can’t say right now. But I know she gets it. The answering emotion in her own gaze tells me that she knows how I feel, and that she feels the exact same way.
