I get what Matthew is saying about being confused. Now that Javier is removed from the equation, there is no reason for Matthew to stick around. How would I feel if I never saw him again? Ugh! Why is all of this happening at once?
My mind churns around and around. I keep going back and forth between thoughts of the men who are worming their way into my life wondering what the repercussions will be now that Javier is gone. There is no way this will go unnoticed or unchallenged. I have this sinking feeling that what is coming next is going to be much worse than dealing with the power-hungry man-child we were dealing with before.
***
“So. Out with it. What happened last night with that hottie?” Maggie can’t even wait until I’ve had my morning tea before she starts grilling me. Apparently Mercy spilled the beans to her about last night.
“Nothing happened. Onyx was passed out cold, for crying out loud. It wasn’t like Matthew and I were in a state of mind to do anything more than try to help him.” Honestly, I love this woman, but I’m still trying to work all of this out in my own mind. I can’t talk about it with anyone right now, not even her.
“Well, now that we don’t have to worry about Javier, you can put your full focus into letting yourself be happy. Matthew did us a favor offing him.”
“I don’t know about that, Maggie, I have a bad feeling about the whole thing. It can’t be a coincidence that two men show up in my life, one of them a guardian, right when we start having problems with Javier. Something is coming, and I’m not sure I’m ready for it. I like what we have here. It’s low-key. I get to help women who need a safe place to work, and I can keep the fact that I’m not a human hidden. I feel like all of that is about to change. I can’t explain it, but I know it is true.”
“If that is true you are going to need supportive people around you. You’ve got two men who are willing to be your support. Just let them make you happy. I know things in the past have made you not trust men. I don’t trust a lot of them either, but you know they all aren’t out to hurt you. You’ve come a long way since you’ve been here. Open your heart. I don’t want to see you alone all of the time unless it is what you truly desire from a place of choice, not wounding. You know I will support whatever you decide, just give them some serious consideration.”
Briefly, Maggie’s lips touch mine. “I love you, Xen. I want you to be happy.”
“I know, Mags. Thanks for being in my corner.”
“Always, honey. Always.”
***
After Maggie goes on about her business, I pile some breakfast onto a plate to take up to Matthew. I doubt he’s going to want to leave Onyx, even to come and eat. I’m grateful that at least one of the girls in this house knows how to cook. It isn’t something I enjoy, and most of the time I don’t have time for it.
Opening the door to the upstairs bedroom, I walk in and set the food on the nightstand beside the bed. I take in the scene in front of me. Even asleep there is no mistaking the love that is present. Onyx is still out, and Matthew has his forehead pressed up to Onyx’s cheek with his arm and leg draped over him. What would that be like? I want to feel something that deeply for someone. I must have been staring too long because Matthew blinks his eyes open and turns to look at me.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to wake you. I just…you both look so perfect.”
Gazing over at Onyx, Matthew sighs. “My first time in bed with him after all of these years, and he doesn’t even know I’m here. That fucking figures.”
His statement breaks up any awkwardness as we both start laughing. The tension from the night before is gone. We both know Onyx will come around eventually, and Matthew and I were able to connect somewhat. It feels good to laugh, to let go even a little bit.
“I figured you would probably be hungry when you woke up, so I brought you some breakfast. I’ll check on you guys later, pick up the dishes, and send someone up with some extra clothes so you don’t have to leave him.”
Matthew sits up and takes my hand. I fight the urge to pull back. We’re making progress, and I don’t want to spoil it. He kisses my palm lightly. “Thank you.” I don’t know what to say. The gesture was both innocent and intimate. I nod and make my way back downstairs.
CHAPTER FORTY-THREE
Matt
I can feel a presence in the room, and it wakes me up. Xenobia is staring intently at me. It makes me happy that she’s here this morning. I’m feeling much better after having slept soundly.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to wake you. I just…you both look so perfect.”
Looking over at Onyx makes me sigh. “My first time in bed with him after all of these years, and he doesn’t even know I’m here. That fucking figures.”
I wasn’t trying to be funny, but suddenly the irony of it seems amusing. Xenobia’s laugh makes me feel even lighter. I don’t think I’ve ever heard her laugh before. I did that. I helped put that happiness there. For once I didn’t piss her off or criticize her. Her thoughtfulness warms my heart too. She brought me food so I wouldn’t have to leave Onyx. I can’t help but take her hand. I want her to know that I appreciate her without it being overpowering. We’re moving forward, and I want it to stay that way.
I’d like her to stay, but I don’t ask her to because I don’t want to push my luck. After all, last night was a big step for her to even lay down beside me, especially with Onyx in the same bed. I get one bite of food and realize just how hungry I am. I don’t know that I have ever inhaled a meal that quickly, in human form anyway. Setting the dishes back on the nightstand, I get up off of the bed to take a shower. I don’t have any other clothes to change into, but the ones I have on are wrinkled and need to be washed. Xen is sending up clothes later so I’ll be naked for a while. Not that I mind, I prefer it.
As much as I want to revel in the happiness of the morning while the hot water relaxes me, reality sets in. I killed Javier. I have no idea what kind of fallout there will be from that. With any luck, the cleaners will have done their job, and no one will be able to connect it to me. But even as I hope for that, I know there is a chance that the shit will hit the fan. Eventually someone is going to miss Javier when he doesn’t go about business as usual.
I realize that I have lost track of time when the water coming out of the shower turns icy. Turning the water off, I reach out to grab the towel hanging by the outside of the shower and make quick work of drying off. When I open the bathroom door I find a stack of clean clothes on the bed and the dishes that I left on the nightstand are gone. Unfortunately, those are the only changes in the room. Onyx is still out and hasn’t moved from the position we laid him in last night.
Slipping into the robe that was also brought up and left hanging over one of the chairs, I walk over to the window and pull the curtains back. Looking out over Xenobia’s property I let my mind wander to keep from worrying, but the damn thing keeps obsessing on the unknown of what is going to happen next. I’m in the middle of my fourth or fifth cycle of repetitive thought when I pick up the slight sound of movement.
Whipping around, I nearly tangle myself in the curtains trying to get back over to the bed, damned fabric. Onyx is making subtle movements, but his eyes are remain closed. “Matthew.”
“I’m here. I’m right here.” I take his hand trying to let him feel my presence. He settles back into nothingness, just as unresponsive as before. I fight the feeling of disappointment. At least he’s shown some improvement, right? Speaking, even for a moment, means he’s getting better. At least I hope so. I’m grasping at any little thing to keep me positive.
CHAPTER FORTY-FOUR
Xenobia
Matthew has been holed up in the room with Onyx for three days. I’ve decided that he needs to get out for at least a few minutes today to try to put his mind on something different. Maybe a walk around the property, or a drive into town. I’d try to talk him into working for a few hours, but I know that isn’t going to happen. I’ve given him his space, checking on him pe
riodically. This is a new experience for me.
Before I came here it was just Urd and me. But we had a whole different set of circumstances that created the bond we shared, a lot of it born out of the need for survival. For the past seven years here on Earth, I have only ever had Maggie and the girls to look out for. I’m close to Maggie, but not so much to the other ladies that live in the house. I care about them, but we don’t socialize very much outside of business and meal times. I help them screen clients to make sure they are safe, but they have their own lives. Mercy and I share a bond. I think that it was created when I gave her my blood. She and I are still getting to know each other. It feels odd to care so much about how Matthew is doing when we are still trying to figure things out. It isn’t a bad thing, just unfamiliar to me. I’m about to head down to the second floor to try to weasel Matthew into taking a break from his watch over Onyx when a text comes through.
There is a Mr. Bello in your office who says he needs to see you immediately.
It looks like Universe just granted Matthew a stay of badgering from me, at least for now. I haven’t seen Ezrah since my initial meeting with him. I must say, I’m curious if Chi sent him, or if he’s here on his own.
I pass Maggie in the hallway as I’m heading towards my office. She’s got a look on her face that has me doing a double-take. “Are you blushing?” I’ve seen Maggie wear a lot of expressions in the few years I have known her, but I’ve never seen her blush. Maggie is full of confidence and sass and is not easily affected.
“Don’t give me a hard time, bitch,” she says, rolling her eyes, “that Mr. Bello is a charmer. Do you think he’s here to set up an interview? If he is, I call dibs.” Now this is an interesting development.
“I have no idea why he’s here, but I’ll let you know if you need to clear your schedule.” I try not to smirk at the strong interest Maggie is showing in him. I’ve seen Maggie attracted to men before. She won’t take any clients she’s not attracted to. This is a lot more intense than usual, and has clearly affected her more.
All of my amusement vanishes though when I get face-to-face with Ezrah. He is carrying a seriously intense energy that I don’t even need to work too hard to sense.
“Thank you for seeing me so quickly. I know this is unexpected.”
“No problem. What is going on?”
“Chi wishes to speak with you.” There is a subtle shift in his energy, and then Chi is present. “I was out in the city last night and overheard that Javier has apparently disappeared. Kage is infuriated because of the loss and is demanding answers. As of yet, he has not discovered any. The fact that he can’t find Onyx isn’t helping matters. He knows one of the last things Javier was working on was reacquiring the girls. You are on his radar now, and that is not a good thing. I don’t think he knows what you are. He is angry, and you connect to the whole situation. Be ready he will make a move soon.”
Well isn’t this just peachy. I want to be angry with Matthew for not being able to control himself, putting us in this position, but deep down I know it isn’t his fault. I’ve killed out of defense of someone I care about too. I can’t judge him without being a hypocrite. The whole thing has complicated matters though. We had a chance of handling Javier. But a Master vampire? I don’t even know where to begin with that.
“The vampire isn’t missing,” I say, “he’s here.” Matthew brought him here a couple of nights ago. We’re trying to figure out what happened to him.”
“Ah, so that is why the curtains were drawn when I flew by to check on you.”
“Um, now that I know about you, please don’t sneak around outside. It is unsettling.”
“Apologies. Habit at this point. Also, I don’t want to push you into seeing me more than you’re ready to. I must go rest now, but I will see you soon.”
And just as quickly as he became present, he was gone. I find myself staring into the eyes of Ezrah again. Even though I should be thinking about the fact that a Master vampire is on my tail, my curiosity overtakes me. “Ezrah, this connection that you have with Chi, does it interfere with personal relationships?”
Ezrah shifts uncomfortably. “It can be challenging. There are times it is like we share one mind and feelings get confused. Most of the time I choose not to pursue anything serious to avoid the awkwardness.”
“That must get lonely.” I know he’s lonely, I’ve felt it. I’m not a matchmaker, but I feel like Maggie could handle the unusual life that Ezrah leads. I know she’s attracted to him. If I had more time, I would pursue this further, but Matthew and I need to talk about this new development. I walk Ezrah out and then head up to have a conversation that I don’t want to have.
CHAPTER FORTY-FIVE
Matt
My stress level raises significantly when Xenobia informs me that she is now on Kage’s radar. This is not good, not good at all. Now I’m worried about her and Onyx. This is my doing. I should have tried harder to control myself. But, I can’t wallow in self-pity right now, we need to figure out what to do.
I’m giving Xenobia as much information as I can on how I understand vampire culture and my experiences with them. I wasn’t a high-ranking member of the pack before I left it, so I can only go by what I was told and what I’ve experienced personally, which isn’t much now that I think about it. I have purposefully distanced myself from interacting with most of the preternatural world outside of my work. After what happened with my sister, I decided I was going to live as much of a normal life as I could. Other than quietly taking out preternatural criminals for the Conclave, I keep to myself and stay out of everyone else’s way.
“They’ll never find Javier; I made sure of that. What we need to do now is figure out the best way to defend ourselves against Kage. He will most likely try to take us out just on principle. You are a wild card, and he won’t risk his territory over something he can’t control. He probably already knows I’ve been poking around for my investigation too. What I don’t understand is why Javier was so important. From what I can tell he was always a bottom feeder bent on chasing power. He aligned himself with anyone he thought would get him where he wanted to go.” I’m watching Xenobia to see how she will react.
“Matthew! What have you done!” Onyx’s voice cuts through the momentary silence.
“Onyx! Thank god! I was so worried. What the hell happened!” I’m trying not to overwhelm him, but my nerves are on edge.
Instead of answering me, he avoids my gaze. I’m relieved that he’s awake, but I’m irritated that he’s not answering me. “Do you know how scared I was! Answer me, damn it!”
I feel Xenobia’s hand on my arm. She is pushing power into me, and I feel myself calming down, but I don’t want to calm down. All of the hurt and worry has finally caught up with me. I try to shake her off, but she tightens her grip.
“Matthew, he’s been through a lot. Shouting at him is not going to make this situation any better. I can feel him, and he feels bad enough, ashamed even. Please, calm down.” Damn her! I want to be angry. Angry feels better than scared and out of control. But, she’s right, if I want to work things out with Onyx, I can’t alienate him.
“How did you even find me?” He might not be looking at me, but at least he’s speaking.
“I’m a Conclave detective and a shifter, how do you think I found you?” Snarky. Sarcastic. Yep. I might have calmed down a bit, but I’m still angry. “Why was Javier at your place?”
“Did it ever occur to you that we might be lovers?” Ouch! That hurt, a lot. I don’t even know what to say besides, EW! Why would Onyx choose Javier when he could have done so much better?
“Enough! You two are acting like children. You’re just poking at each other, and it is not accomplishing anything. We’ve got some serious business to attend to, so work it out!” We had both forgotten Xenobia was in the room and her outburst brought an abrupt halt to the inane banter. Onyx at least has the good grace to look as embarrassed as I feel.
“You never answered my
question. What have you done, Matthew?” Onyx finally looks me in the eye with deadly seriousness.
“I took out Javier. When I got to your place and found him with you, my wolf took over. I just lost it. Seriously, why would you even let him into your home? We’re you two lovers?” I’m afraid that even though he was trying to jab me earlier, it might actually be true. Onyx turns his face away from me, and for a minute I think I’m going to hear something that I don’t know if I can bear.
“It is a closely guarded secret among vampires that Fae blood is addictive to them. After you left years ago, I was forced to create a dependency on it. I became an addict. Eventually I got clean, but there is always the temptation. Thankfully not many humans carry potent Fae blood, but Javier did. He was the Master Kage’s pet and supplier. I only knew about him because Kage often loaned me to Javier as an enforcer. After you rejected me at the lake, I came home and tried to deal with it. Eventually the pain became too much for me, and I wanted it to stop, so I called Javier over. Not my finest hour.”
I think I would almost rather hear that they were lovers more than hearing this. I wasn’t there when he was struggling in the past, and my actions in the present hurt him enough to drive him to the one thing he absolutely needs to stay away from. This revelation of his has also revealed why Kage was so invested in Javier. This is worse than I originally thought. Vampires can be volatile enough just on their own. But a vampire purging his system of steady addiction, I can’t even imagine.
A cry of pain shakes me out of my thoughts. Onyx is writhing on the bed. His body is coming down from the blood he took from Javier. He also hasn’t had any other blood for days. Those two put together must be excruciating for him. Without hesitation I shove my arm in his face. “Drink!” Hopefully my blood will give him enough of a rush to ease the symptoms a bit.
The Rise of House Valdis Page 9
