by Mariano, Sam
“But I’m nobody,” I say, shaking my head in disbelief. “I mean, yeah, I have the grades, but… I can’t believe they want to let me in. Just because you asked them to?”
“Asked? I’ve fucking campaigned,” he says lightly. “I knew getting you into Columbia was the only nice way to get you to move here with me, so I did what I had to do. Usually for special admissions like this, they would look at a prospective student’s family to see if they’re worth letting in. Obviously your family isn’t worth bending admission standards for, but mine?” None too modestly, he shrugs. “In addition to all of your hard work and all my campaigning, my dad is making a sizable donation to the university on your behalf.”
That admission warms my heart and blows my mind. I don’t know how to process what he just said. “For me?”
“For you. For us,” he amends.
This is too much. I don’t even know what to say, how to express my confusion or my gratitude. “But why? Why would he do that for me?”
Cocking his head to the side in a guilty fashion, Carter says, “I may have told him some things to give him incentive. Things I’ve done to you. Things you could potentially tell people about down the road, if you didn’t like me so much. Things that might derail that career in law I’m planning to pursue. Wouldn’t make the family look too good, either.”
My eyes widen as I take his meaning. “You told him about that?
Shameless as he is, Carter smirks. “Even embellished a little to really drive home the point of how much damage you’re capable of inflicting, if we didn’t make some gesture to keep you on our good side.”
I’m glad he finds this so amusing, because I’m starting to sweat. “Are you crazy, Carter? He really will send a hitman after me!”
Carter shakes his head dismissively. “I told you, my dad fights potential scandal with his checkbook, not hitmen. He wasn’t too thrilled that he had to pay off another girl, but I assured him you’ll be the last. I’m keeping you, and that’ll keep me in line.”
He’s completely crazy, but as he bends down to kiss me, I can’t help wrapping my arms and legs around him and pulling him down on top of me so I can properly kiss him back. “I can’t believe you told your father about that. You are absolutely insane, but you’re wonderful. Your father must think I’m crazy to be in a relationship with you after all that.”
Brushing my hair back, Carter shakes his head. “Nah. He knows there are a lot of behaviors women will tolerate if it comes with a comfortable living.”
I lose my smile, reaching up to caress his face. “You know it has absolutely nothing to do with that for me, right?”
Touching my hand on his face, he offers me a little smile. “Of course I do. That’s none of his business, though. Let him believe whatever makes sense to him. As long as you get to go to Columbia and I get to keep you with me, I don’t care what he thinks.”
“I can’t believe you did all this for me, Carter. This is huge. This is… life-changing.”
Capturing my hand and bringing it to his lips, he presses a soft kiss there. “I’d do anything for you.”
And there it is. Not just his words or his enormous gesture, but that look in his eyes, the one that communicates all the love he has for me. That’s the reason I believe his promises. The reason I believe in him, period. Whatever wickedness he’s capable of, Carter doesn’t want to lose me. He may be hell on wheels sometimes, he may be a challenging, difficult guy with as many issues as he has privileges, but when he looks me in the eye after all this and tells me he would do anything for me, no part of me doubts that he means it. Scary as it can be sometimes, Carter would do anything for me.
“Someday, you’re not going to get something you want,” I inform him. “But today is not that day.”
Grinning, he pecks me on the lips. “Finally convinced being with me won’t ruin your life?”
I nod my head. “This may have done it. There’s no way I can afford the tuition, but for Columbia, I’ll take on some debt. Hopefully I can get the loans I need to pay for it.”
“No need. My dad’s paying your tuition. Part of your pay-off deal.”
Pumping my fist in the air, I say, “Yes!” Grabbing his face, I demand, “Do you know what this means? We’re going to Columbia together. I can save you from your bitchy future wife!”
“And warm my bed every night,” he adds.
“This is why you weren’t worried about long-distance,” I realize. “You knew we wouldn’t have to do it. You knew I was moving here with you all along and you’ve just been torturing me.”
“I had to. Just in case I couldn’t get everybody on board. Imagine how much more disappointed you would have been if I told you I’d try to get you in, and then I couldn’t. It was much better as a surprise.”
“Did Caroline know?”
“Yes. She knew she had to help you pick out an outfit for your Columbia interview, but I told her not to say anything.”
“And Kasey? Did she know you were trying to pad my resume?”
“I told her for college, but I didn’t specify which one. I knew Caroline would keep my secrets, I didn’t trust your friends to.”
“You’re amazing,” I tell him, kissing the side of his face. “And wonderful,” I add, dropping a kiss at the corner of his mouth. “And incredible.” Another kiss. “Thank you so much for doing this, Carter. This is above and beyond anything I’ve ever hoped for.”
His tone is light, but his eyes are solemn as he tells me, “I’m the one who should be thanking you. You’re above and beyond anything I’ve ever hoped for. I never even knew to look for you, but I sure am glad I stumbled across you.”
I feel a pang of affection as my heart fills up. I wrap my arms around him to draw him as close to me as possible. It sure has been a hell of a ride and I haven’t always been thrilled to have encountered Carter Mahoney, but at the end of the day, despite pushing past—and sometimes exploding—my comfort zones, he has opened up parts of me I didn’t even know were closed, and I think it’s for the best. In all honesty, I don’t want to be the kind of person who is so afraid of leaving my comfort zone, I become imprisoned by it. I don’t want to be a person who is afraid to be challenged.
Truthfully, I’d rather be captivated by Carter than be comfortable any day.
In all the ways that matter, I make Carter better, and I think he makes me better, too. He needs a little taming, and I need a little shove sometimes. Carter can love me and challenge me at the same time, and I can keep him from being too catastrophic. Oh, and keep him happy. I’m pretty proud of that.
I know life with Carter won’t always be easy. Sometimes he’ll be mean and pushy, and I’ll have to stand my ground until he finds a way around it. He probably will, too. He’ll always try to outsmart me, try to find alternative paths to getting his way, even when I don’t want to give it to him. That doesn’t annoy me, though. That has been our dynamic since day one; I’m almost looking forward to taking him on again and again.
Whatever life with Carter will be like, it will never be boring.
Epilogue
one year later
“What I’m saying is, you can’t blame the psychiatrist in the study for incorrectly diagnosing. The pseudo-patients made up a schizophrenic episode in order to get admitted to the hospital. Just because they didn’t exhibit symptoms when—”
“Psychiatrists, plural. Are you really going to tell me there’s not one competent person in that hospital who would have noticed, hey, wait, this person seems totally healthy and not schizophrenic at all?”
Gaping, Max rears back dramatically in his chair. “Except for the schizophrenic episode that got them admitted, you mean? So, what, we’re supposed to completely throw out the behavior if they act normal tomorrow? Should we just go on a day-by-day basis? Hey, I know you committed a mass murder yesterday, but today you dropped a dollar in the Salvation Army bell ringer’s shiny red pail, so now you’re a-okay.”
I grin as Cadence grabs
her head like it might explode from the mounting frustration of conversing with him. The study sessions for my psychology class are always intense, and Max and Cadence are always at each other’s throats. They’ve never met an issue they could agree on, and it’s so entertaining to watch them fight to the death, we’ve literally started bringing popcorn.
While they continue to go at it, Lucis moves the bowl toward me invitingly. Flashing him a conspiratorial smile, I grab a handful of popcorn and reach for my phone to check the time. My smile drops along with my heart when it lights up and I see the time.
I was supposed to leave 16 minutes ago.
“Shit.” Shoving the popcorn in my mouth and slamming my notebook shut, I start to gather my things.
Noticing movement, Max tears his attention away from Cadence and glances my way. “What do you think, Zoey?”
“I can see both sides of the issue, honestly, but I don’t have time to debate. I did not realize what time it was. I have to go.”
“What?” Cadence demands, wide-eyed. “But we’re right in the middle of this, and we haven’t even finished reviewing the material. We’ve got finals this week, you can’t leave.”
“I have to,” I tell them, shoving the last of my things into my messenger bag and dragging it over my head. “It’s date night.”
“Date night? Isn’t that something middle-aged, married women have once they’ve stopped having regular sex?” Lucis demands, cocking a dark eyebrow at me as I pull on my coat.
I slant him a look as I button up my coat. “Trust me, I have not stopped having regular sex.”
Cadence snickers while Lucis rolls his eyes. “Come on, stay,” he implores. “Carter won’t actually die if he has to entertain himself for one evening. I promise.”
“Seriously, you can’t ditch us for date night,” Max mocks. “Just text him and tell him you’ll be another hour.”
Candace grabs a fistful of popcorn and comments to Max, “I love that movie, though. Have you ever seen it? With Tina Fey. So funny.”
I don’t bother telling them if I text Carter and try to put him off, he’ll show up at our study group and haul me out of here over his shoulder like an uncivilized caveman. Instead, I flash them a smile, let them think date nights are a lame establishment for stale relationships, and leave them with a wave, knowing otherwise.
To make matters even worse, my walk home takes a few minutes longer than usual. It has been snowing all day, light fluffy flakes, but all those flakes add up. A few inches cover the slick sidewalk with more coming down, catching in my hair and all over my coat.
It may take a little longer, but I love when it snows in the city. Big snow, little snow, I’m still so enchanted by the chill in the air and the sight of the white flakes against the backdrop of skyscrapers and the dark night sky… there’s nothing better. I can’t decide if I like fall or winter up here better, but I was definitely right when I thought how nice it would be to have both.
The door is unlocked when I make it back to the apartment. We usually keep it locked even if we are at home. Our building is safe, but just as an added precaution. Carter must have unlocked it to save me an extra minute fiddling with the key. That means he has definitely noticed I am running late.
I kick off my boots and pluck off my hat as soon as I get in the door. Lisa, our nanny, stands at the sink, cleaning up from dinner and post-dinner snacks.
“Hey, Lisa,” I greet, warmly.
It was quite a feat convincing Carter to hire a nanny, but I told him we would take every precaution to make sure we didn’t hire anyone unsafe. I put this poor woman through extensive interviews myself, contacted every single reference she could scrounge up, and even interviewed the now-grown children she nannied for early in her career. Lisa is a grandmother, a retired teacher, and a lovely addition to our family. Chloe just loves her, and I know the feeling is mutual.
“Oooh, you’re late,” Lisa jokes, flashing me a smile over her shoulder as I peel off my coat.
“I know,” I say on a sigh. “I got caught up and lost track of time. Thank you for doin’ the dishes,” I add, before hustling toward the bedroom.
As I approach the bedrooms, I hear Chloe’s voice, haltingly sounding out words as she helps Carter read her bedtime story. She’s in kindergarten now and she’s got all the words on her kindergarten word sheet memorized, but her level readers like to throw her a curve ball every now and then, depending on the story.
“What?” Carter demands, playfully, when she gets it completely wrong. “That word doesn’t start with a B.”
I peek my head in just in time to see Chloe throw her hands down on the book and sigh. “I get confused sometimes!”
Carter leans in and rubs her back, then leans over the book. “It’s all right, just slow down.” Pointing at a spot on the page, he asks, “What letter is that?”
“That one’s a D. Sometimes I get the B and D mixed up when they’re lower case.”
“No big deal, I did too, when I was your age. So, what’s the D sound?”
I sigh quietly to myself, then leave them to finish their story so I can go get ready for our date. I wanted to take a shower before we left since the snow did a number on my hair, but I don’t have time now. We can always take a nice, hot shower together when we get back home.
By the time Carter makes it in, I’m standing at my sink in the master bath, putting my earrings in. I catch his gaze in the mirror and smile at him.
“How did the bedtime story go?”
“She’s just about got all these level readers memorized, we’re gonna have to get her some new ones.”
“Pretty sure Santa has that taken care of,” I tell him.
“Mm,” he murmurs, wrapping his arms around me from behind. “You’re the sexiest Santa I’ve ever seen.”
Winking at him in the mirror, I tell him, “Wait until you see my Christmas lingerie.”
“I thought it might be Christmas before you got here,” he informs me. “Study session run long again tonight?”
“Yeah. It’s still going,” I tell him, bumping my butt against him to move him back so I can open my drawer and grab some Chapstick to run over my lips. “I told them I had to bail early for date night and they made fun of me.”
Cocking an eyebrow, he points out, “It wasn’t early. You said it would be over an hour ago.”
“I know,” I say on a sigh, capping my Chapstick and putting it back. “Max and Candace started fighting about the case study and… it just became a whole thing. You should just let me study with Lucis and leave the other two out of it, then there’d be less distractions and I’d get home a lot sooner.”
“Yeah, right. Lucis would keep you out just as late flirting with you,” he states.
“He doesn’t flirt with me,” I murmur.
“He wants to fuck you.”
“You always think someone wants to fuck me. You’re biased by your own personal interest in fucking me.”
His arms tighten and he smiles, kissing my neck and sending a thrill down my spine. “Damn right, I want to fuck you. I would right now if we weren’t already running late.” Releasing me and disappearing into the other room, Carter lets me finish getting ready.
Or, I think he’s leaving to let me finish getting ready, but then he comes back holding a small black case. He cracks it open, draws out a little black and silver bullet vibrator, and hands it to me.
“What is this?” I ask, inspecting the toy since I’ve never seen it before.
“Early Christmas present. Put it in.”
“Right now? We’re already late.”
In response, he grabs the soft fabric of my little black dress and draws it up over my ass and around my waist. My body throbs with interest as he bunches the fabric in one hand and runs his palm over my ass. “Right now.”
Well, all right, then. I push down my panties and push the little bullet vibrator inside me. Once I’ve finished, I hit the light and join Carter in the bedroom, but frown when I see hi
m slipping on his coat.
“What are you doing?”
He glances back at me and cocks an eyebrow. “Putting my coat on. If you want to see the Rockettes, we need to get the hell out of here.”
“But… I have the…” I glance toward the hall, even though I know Chloe can’t hear us. “I have the thing in.”
Carter smirks at me. “I know.”
I widen my eyes pointedly, but before I have to ask, he reaches into his pocket and draws out a matching black and silver circular object.
“Wireless remote,” he explains. “We’re going to have a little fun tonight.”
My heart skips a beat as I follow him out of the bedroom. “In public?”
“Wherever, whenever I want,” he says.
Mm, that sounds intriguing. “You’re tryin’ to get me put on the naughty list, aren’t you?” I ask, following after him. “Santa isn’t gonna bring me anything but a lump of coal this year.”
“That’s okay, I give better presents than he does, anyway.” Glancing back over his shoulder, he says, “You’re lucky it has limited range, I’d make you wear it to study sessions. Every time I have a hunch Lucis is doing something that would irritate me…” He reaches into his pocket, and a moment later I jump, startled by the jolt of vibration inside me. Damn, for a little bullet massager, this thing has oomph.
“Scandalous,” I tell him, breathing a sigh of relief when he turns it off just before we approach Lisa. “Hey, I could always invite Lucis to study here sometime,” I tease. “He and I could study in the privacy of the bedroom, while you—”
“Keep it up,” Carter says.
I grin, speeding up so I can hug him from behind. “You know I’m just teasin’ you.”
“It’s all fun and games until I fuck up someone’s life,” he half-jokes.
“Don’t you dare. He’s my TA, he might revenge-grade my papers.”
He turns, catching me around the waist and drawing me against him. “Plus, you only want me.”
