Allegra stumbled to a halt in front of Lottie, clutching Lottie's doll. "Here," she said, thrusting the doll into Lottie's arms. "You take her." The girl's slender throat hitched, betraying how hard she was struggling not to cry. "I don't want you to be all alone."
Lottie tenderly smoothed down a scorched wisp of the doll's hair before handing her back to Allegra. "She never cared much for London. She always said it was too stuffy and civilized for a pirate queen. I'd rather you look after her until I get back." Drawing the child into a fierce embrace, Lottie whispered into her ear, "And I will be back. I promise."
Lottie straightened, giving Allegra into Miss Terwilliger's gnarled but capable hands. Handing her cane to a footman, the old woman rested those hands on Allegra's shoulders, urging her to stand straight and tall.
Ned held out a gloved hand, his expressionsomber. Lottie took it and climbed into the carriage, sinking into the seat next to her basket of cats while Ned settled himself next to Harriet. When she had arrived at Oakwylde Manor all those weeks ago, her heart had still been longing for home. Now she was going home, yet leaving her heart behind.
As the carriage lurched into motion, she leaned out the window and gave the manor one last look. Although the mullioned windows reflected little but the cloudswept sky, she could feel Hayden there — watching, waiting. He'd given her no choice for now but to leave him to his ghosts.
"If you ever truly loved him, Justine," she whispered fiercely, pressing her eyes shut, "then set him free."
The sound that came drifting back to her ears might have been the cry of a kittiwake wheeling over the breakers or a woman's laughter rippling on the wind.
Chapter 19
Perhaps it wasn't too late to trade my soul for his…
"AUNT LOTTIE'S COME HOME! AUNT LOTTIE'S come home!"
As Lottie descended from the carriage in front of Devonbrooke House, her niece's jubilant cry greeted her from an upstairs window. The front door of the house flew open and her family came spilling out, all laughing and chattering at once.
For a few minutes, all was chaos as they enveloped her in a bruising round of hugs and kisses. Laura beamed as Sterling swung Lottie around in a wide circle, lifting her clean off her feet. Uncle Thane and Aunt Diana had been invited for supper, so their twins and their spaniels added to the noisy confusion by frolicking beneath everyone's feet. When Lottie heard a sharp yelp, she quickly moved her foot, unsure if she had stepped on a dog or a toddler.
George thumped her on the back, grinning like a drunkard. "I never thought I'd miss your prattling, sis, but I must say it's been deadly dull around here ever since you left."
"That's not what I heard," Lottie retorted, nodding toward her traveling companion, who was helping Harriet down from the carriage. "Sir Ned tells me that you've been courting a certain red-haired opera dancer for the past fortnight."
Scowling at Ned, George blushed to the roots of his sandy hair. "Balderdash! It's more like she's been courting me."
"Aunt Lottie! Aunt Lottie!" Eight-year-old Nicholas tugged at the sleeve of her spencer. "Is it true what they say about Cornwall? Do they have fearsome giants there who clean their teeth with children's bones?"
"I should say not, Nicky." Lottie raked a lock of wavy dark hair out of her nephew's brown eyes. "The giants in Cornwall eat the bones as well. You can hear them crunching in the middle of the night when you're trying to sleep."
As he squealed in delight, his nine-year-old sister rolled her eyes. "Boys are so silly. Everyone knows that there are no such things as giants in Cornwall. Or anywhere else, for that matter."
"You're right, Ellie," Lottie said, keeping her expression utterly serious. "But that's only because the sea monsters ate them all."
"See!" Nicholas shouted. "I told you there were sea monsters in Cornwall!" Hooting with triumph, he gave one of his sister's golden curls a sharp yank. As he went dancing out of her reach, Uncle Thane scooped both a spaniel and a twin out of harm's way.
"Why, you wretched little— " Abandoning all pretense of sophistication, Ellie took off after her brother, chasing him down the tree-shaded block.
As Lottie gazed after them, Laura slipped an arm around her waist. "Why so wistful? You can't tell me you've missed their constant bickering."
"I was just thinking about how much I'd love to introduce them to someone I know."
"Your daughter?"
Realizing that she had never thought of Allegra that way until that very moment, Lottie felt her throat tighten. "Yes," she said softly. "My daughter."
Sterling gave the carriage a puzzled look. "So where is that doting husband of yours? If he's cowering in the carriage, afraid I'll shoot him, you should let him know that Addison has my pistols locked safely away."
Lottie took as deep a breath as her corset would allow. This was the moment she'd been dreading. Pasting on a cheery smile, she turned to her brother-in-law. "I'm afraid Hayden wasn't able to accompany me on this trip. He's quite busy with estate business this time of year. But he insisted that I come anyway. He knows how much I've missed you all and he didn't want to deprive me of your company."
Sterling chuckled. "From what I gathered from your letters, he's quite besotted with his beautiful young bride. I'm surprised the two of you can bear to be separated for more than a day."
George snickered. "Or an hour."
"George," Laura said softly, placing a warning hand on her brother's arm as she studied Lottie's face.
Lottie could feel her smile faltering. She hadn't shed a single tear since leaving Oakwylde, but a dangerous prickling was starting to build behind her eyelids. Painfully aware of Sir Ned's sympathetic gaze, she said, "Of course it's a terrible burden for us to be apart from each other for any length of time. I'm sure he'll be as lost without me as I will be without him."
Oblivious to his sister's mounting distress, George patted her on the shoulder. "So now that you have the poor fellow under your paw, how long is he going to let you stay with us?"
"Forever, I'm afraid," Lottie blurted out, bursting into tears and throwing herself into Laura's arms.
* * *
Alone at last, Lottie sat in her old bed, a mountain of snowy white pillows plumped behind her back. Although it was a balmy summer evening outside, a cozy fire crackled on the hearth, warming the spacious bedchamber. Cookie had even tucked a heated brick wrapped in flannel beneath the blankets at the foot of the bed to warm her toes. Pumpkin and Mr. Wiggles were currently glaring at each other, trying to determine who was going to have the privilege of stretching out on top of it.
Once Lottie might have taken shameless advantage of her family's pampering, but tonight she'd felt only relief when Laura had finally shooed them all from the room. She didn't think she could bear another minute of Diana and Cookie's sympathetic clucking or Sterling, George, and Thane's threats to hunt down her scoundrel of a husband and rip his heart from his chest for making her cry.
Laura had been the last to go, giving Lottie's hand a gentle squeeze before promising, "When you're ready to talk, I'll be here."
Throwing back the smothering weight of the quilt, Lottie climbed out of the bed. As pleasant as her family's cosseting was, she wasn't a little girl anymore. She was past the age where a broken heart could be mended with a cup of warm chocolate and a steaming hunk of Cookie's gingerbread.
It didn't take her long to find what she was looking for. Her writing case was the last thing she had shoved into her hastily packed valise. She perched on the end of the bed, her feet drawn up so Mirabella couldn't dash out from under the bed and attack them, and unlatched the case. She had crammed the pages of her manuscript back into it without ceremony, no longer caring if they got wrinkled or torn.
If Hayden hadn't found them, she might be settled in the marchioness's chamber at Oakwylde right now, awaiting her husband's pleasure. Lottie closed her eyes for an aching moment, knowing that Hayden's skillful hands and oh-so-clever mouth would have made sure that his pleasure was also her o
wn.
Opening her eyes, she gazed down at the manuscript. Her brilliant prose now seemed like nothing more than the meanderings of some overindulged child who had been told her every scribble was a masterpiece. As she flipped through the pages, the silky rasp of Hayden's voice haunted her more surely than any ghost.
It's a bit late in the tale to reform the Deadly Duke, don't you think?
It's never too late, she had told him. Not if he has someone to believe in him.
But she hadn't believed in him. No one had. Not the scandal sheets, not society, not even his own daughter. And she had proved herself no different from any of them by demanding a truth she already knew in her heart.
Suddenly Lottie realized why her family's attention had made her squirm. She didn't deserve their pity, nor did Hayden deserve their contempt. She was just as much to blame for their parting as he was.
She also knew what she had to do. Dumping the pages out of the writing case, she gathered them into her arms. She'd never willingly destroyed a single jot of her handwriting, but her steps were steady as she rose from the bed and marched to the fireplace. She held the pages to her heart for the briefest moment before tossing them into the dancing flames.
She didn't linger to watch them burn. Instead, she returned to the writing case and drew out a clean sheet of paper, a pen, and a fresh bottle of ink. Using the case as a makeshift desk, she settled herself against the pillows and began to write, her hand flying across the page as if winged.
* * *
"What in the devil do you think she's doing up there?" Sterling stood with hands on hips, scowling up at the ceiling of the drawing room. "Burning her lamp until the wee hours of the morning, dressing like a charwoman, taking all of her meals in her room."
"At least she's eating," Laura pointed out from her place on the sofa. She smoothed the sampler she was stitching over her knee. "Cookie swears every tray comes back to the kitchen all but licked clean."
"It's not her appetite I'm worried about. It's her state of mind. She's been back in London for nearly two months and she hasn't attended a single tea or soiree. Poor George is so bored with entertaining Miss Dimwinkle that he's about to pull his hair out. Or hers. Yet still Lottie refuses to leave the house and the only caller she'll receive is that rascal Townsend." A pained frown clouded his brow. "She never did say why Oakleigh sent her away. You don't suppose…"
"No, I don't." Laura jabbed her needle firmly through the fabric. "And nor should you. Lottie's whims may be fickle, but her heart never has been."
"If I'd have known the scoundrel would send her back with it broken, I'd have shot him on sight." Raking a hand through his tawny hair, Sterling sighed. "I don't know how much longer I can bear all of this mystery. I only wish she would confide in us."
Laura rose to tenderly link her arm through his. "Be patient, my love," she said, giving the ceiling an enigmatic glance of her own. "Perhaps that's exactly what she's doing."
* * *
"Aunt Lottie! Aunt Lottie!"
Laying aside her pen, Lottie sighed. She might be able to shut out the rest of the world while she worked, but it was impossible to ignore her nephew's exuberant bellow. He rarely spoke in anything but a shout, but he had a particularly deafening bellow reserved for special occasions.
Rubbing her lower back, she rose from the writing desk and hurried to the window, sweeping the voluminous folds of Cookie's apron out of her way. She'd given up any hope of ever scrubbing all the ink out from under her fingernails, but she still possessed enough vanity to want to protect her pretty gowns.
She threw open the sash and leaned out, blinking as the bright afternoon sunshine blinded her. She'd only managed to steal three hours of sleep last night and she felt as dazed as a caterpillar emerging from its cocoon. She finally located her nephew dangling from the lowest branch of the elm tree that shaded the broad tree-lined street.
"What is it, Nicky? Have you caught another shiny bug?"
Grinning, the boy pointed down at the street. "This time I caught a shiny carriage!"
Lottie squinted down at the vehicle parked in front of the mansion. A crested carriage certainly wasn't an uncommon sight in this posh corner of London. Sterling maintained half a dozen of them in his own carriage house. But none of them had the heraldic emblem of an oak tree with spreading branches etched on their lacquered doors.
Lottie's heart doubled its rhythm.
The next thing she knew, she was flying down the broad staircase, whipping off Cookie's apron as she went. She shoved it into the hands of a startled maid at the foot of the stairs, then went barreling toward the wide-eyed footman standing beside the front door.
"Will you be going out, my lady? Shall I fetch your— "
When she showed no signs of slowing, he swept open the door, obviously fearing she was going to run right through it if he didn't. Lottie stumbled to a halt on the front stoop, frantically shoving a loose curl back into her untidy topknot.
If not for the black-garbed figure who accompanied her, Lottie might not have recognized the child descending from the carriage. Miss Terwilliger leaned heavily on her cane, but the girl stood straight and tall, wearing a fetching blue bonnet and frock. Her hair had been gathered into glossy dark braids. Despite the proud tilt of her chin, she clutched the doll in her arms in a white-knuckled grip, clearly uncertain of her welcome.
"Allegra!" Lottie raced down the front steps and swept Hayden's daughter into her arms.
As she crushed the child to her, she would have almost sworn she could smell the scent of the moor on her — that elusive breath of wild wind and growing things. Lottie inhaled deeply, praying she woulddetect a thread of bayberry winding through it.
"Just look at you!" Holding Allegra by the shoulders, Lottie set the girl away from her. "I swear you've grown two inches in as many months!"
Miss Terwilliger sniffed. "That shouldn't surprise you. Most children thrive on equally strict doses of affection, discipline, and fresh air."
Lottie glanced over Allegra's shoulder at the carriage, unable to completely disguise the hope leaping in her heart. "Surely you ladies didn't travel so far without an escort, did you?"
Instead of answering, Allegra reached into the reticule looped around her wrist and drew out a square of folded vellum.
She held it out to Lottie. "This is for you. He sealed it before I could read it."
Her heart sinking, Lottie took the note and drew her thumbnail along its seam, breaking the wax seal she recognized as her husband's. She slowly unfolded it.
My lady, it read in Hayden's tidy scrawl. My daughter has done nothing but mope since you left. Her morose countenance is beginning to play havoc with my digestion. Please look after her. As a postscript, he'd added, You were a much better mother to her than I ever was a father.
When she lowered the note, Allegra was gazing up at her, her violet eyes beseeching. "He's all alone now. I'm frightened for him."
"I know, sweeting," Lottie whispered, gathering the child into her arms. "So am I."
They might have remained that way for a long time if Ellie hadn't come skidding around the side of the house at the precise moment Nicholas swung down from the tree and landed right in front of them.
"What on earth are you bellowing about now?" Ellie demanded of her brother, giving his shoulder a shove. "One of these days you're going to catch fire and no one is going to throw a bucket of water on you because you're always going on and on about nothing at all."
Before Nicky could shout a retort, Ellie spotted their visitors. Allegra was openly gaping at her, wide-eyed with astonishment at finding herself face-to-face with a living, breathing duplicate of the doll in her arms.
Scowling at the doll, Ellie planted her hands on her hips and tossed her topknot of golden curls, her snub nose fixed firmly in the air. "Where did you get that? Aunt Lottie would never let me play with her."
To Lottie's surprise, instead of snarling back at her niece, Allegra ran to the carriage and ret
rieved the doll her father had given her. "Here," she said, shoving the raven-haired beauty into Ellie's arms. "You can play with her if you'd like."
Ellie studied the doll, then stole a surreptitious glance at Allegra, caught off guard by the uncanny resemblance. Although she was younger than Allegra by at least a year, she finally sighed and said, "Well, I'm too old to play with dolls, but if you insist, I don't suppose it can do any harm. Would you like to see my kittens? I have a dozen of them in my bedchamber. They don't care for anyone but me, but perhaps they'll let you pet them if I tell them it's all right."
"I have kittens, too," Allegra said, running back to the carriage to fetch a woven basket. She flipped open the lid and four bewhiskered faces popped into view. Recognizing the cats she had given Hayden, Lottie knew Allegra had not exaggerated. Her father was well and truly alone now.
While the girls went off, hand in hand, each clutching a replica of the other, Nicholas was left standing forgotten on the pavement. He wrinkled his freckled nose and spat in disgust. "Girls!"
Lottie rumpled his hair. "They're not nearly as pleasant as bugs, are they? While the girls are playing with their dolls and kittens, why don't you escort Miss Terwilliger into the house and ask your mother to prepare two guest chambers?"
Dragging his feet, Nicky obeyed. As he and the governess disappeared into the house, Lottie unfolded the note again, gently smoothing her fingertips over Hayden's words. "I'll look after her," she whispered. "And I'll look after you, too. You just see if I don't."
Tucking the note in the pocket of her skirt, she hurried up the front stairs, more eager than ever to get back to her work.
* * *
A crisp autumn breeze drifted through the dormer windows of the fourth-story office, mingling with the acrid scent of soot from the nearby chimney pots. Lottie kept her gloved hands folded tightly over her reticule to keep them from fluttering all over the place and betraying her nervousness. She could hardly believe she was sitting in the offices of Minerva Press.
One Night Of Scandal Page 23
