by Jessica Gray
Not finding any answers, she settled in the deck chair, pulling her legs up onto the seat and wrapping the towel and her arms around them. Her chin resting on her knees, she watched the scenery in front of her, not really seeing anything. Lost in reflection, Lee replayed the conversation she’d had with Rocco regarding marriage and its uselessness. When had she become so jaded and critical?
Back in her college days she’d still believed in the concept of marriage and had actively dated, trying to discover the one man who would help her fulfill all of her dreams. She’d been full of ideals and dreams of the future – not only about love. After taking her first environmental law class a fiery desire to make the world a better place had burnt inside her. She and her best friend had joined several campus groups dedicated to protecting the environment and had looked forward to making their mark on the world after college.
When reality had hit, it had hit hard. Making the world a better place was a noble cause, but one that didn’t pay well. Many of the environmental groups were non-profits and only hired pro bono lawyers. For a recently graduated law student, with a mountain of student loans, and a mother in debt up to her eyeballs, pro bono was not even up for consideration.
She’d still believed in love and marriage even when her fiancé, a Marine, had dumped her for another girl he’d met during one of his missions. With her personal life shattered and her career dreams on the rocks, she’d taken the first job offer – Parker & Armstrong, a family law firm in Chicago.
Her bosses Trevor and Blaine were terrific, as were her colleagues, and she’d been so idealistic for the first week. Having grown up with only a mother in residence, she’d never witnessed the dynamic present in a two-parent household. She’d believed the picture presented to her by the media of a happy father and mother, working together to raise their children and make the world a better place.
What a load of crap! By the end of her first week on the job, Lee had witnessed four marriages break up over the most ridiculous causes. Despite that, she’d taken pride in doing her best job possible and soon became Trevor’s right hand. While technically still in charge of the cases, he’d sent many high-profile clients her way, and she had kept up a grueling pace to make him proud of her.
But the success had forced her to muffle her own conscience, and almost three years later, she’d turned into a cynic, believing she was actually doing the world a favor by helping people get out of their marriages. Until her nervous breakdown.
Her personal feelings on the subject of marriage had long since been filed away and hidden. Now, sitting by the lake, however, that closet in her mind cracked open. Did she really feel the institution of marriage should be outlawed? She started going through her list of acquaintances to find any truly happily married people.
As she ran down the list, she realized that she did indeed know many happily married people. Her brother Seth and his wife Barbara. Her older sister Anne and Tom. Seth’s friend Peter Shaw and Rachel. Only Peter’s friend Robert hadn’t tied the knot with Karen, his girlfriend of almost three years, though they seemed happily in love. All of the women were happy with a partner, and always surrounded by family.
In comparison, Lee had her mother, and casual friends she hung out with on occasion. Her social life consisted of late nights at the office or even later nights at home, poring over legal texts and preparing for the next case.
She grew more and more depressed as she thought about the path her life had taken. No wonder she’d lost it in the courtroom. Shaking her head, she readjusted herself in the deck chair and reached for the bottle of water and the apple she had brought with her.
Her Kindle lay, forgotten, on the grass next to the chair. She continued to think about her life choices as she ate the apple. If she’d been willing to sacrifice a little longer, been poor a little longer, could she have made a difference in the environmental law community?
Questions like these were usually to be avoided at all costs. Lee had spent the last several years purposely avoiding asking herself the tough questions. She had enough on her plate with her caseload, paying the bills, watching out for her mother – self-reflection could only add more stress to her already pegged-out life.
After finishing her apple, she drank some of the water and decided to go for another swim. The exercise would help clear her mind and get her back on track. Wading into the lake, Lee set a grueling pace and headed for the buoy.
Once at the buoy, she held on with an arm and let the water move her at will. An older couple launched their canoe a little farther down the bank. The care with which the man helped his wife get settled in made her stomach clench with longing.
They were around retirement age, and as they pushed off from the shore, Lee smiled at the man as he grabbed the oar and began to paddle them out into deeper water. Snippets of their conversation floated over the waves to her. This couple was clearly happy and still in love.
After watching them paddle out of view, she noticed her hands had begun to take on the wrinkled appearance of having been in the water too long. She swam back to the shore and got out of the water. Thirsty from the exercise, she drank the rest of the water, and her stomach grumbled, requiring more nourishment than the meager apple she’d given it.
Donning her shorts and tank top, she folded up her chair, packed up her belongings, and returned to the cabin. The walk back to the cabin was slightly uphill and by the time she reached the back porch, she was feeling the burn in her calves and was slightly out of breath. Note to self – start taking the stairs at work. She desperately needed to get back in shape if walking a measly quarter of a mile wore her out.
As she climbed the stairs to the deck, she stopped to listen for the sound of Rocco’s power tools. Nothing. Silence. To her surprise, she was actually disappointed not to find him around.
Back at the cabin, she noted it was only 3 o’clock in the afternoon and Rocco was nowhere in sight. But what did she care anyways? She should be happy to be left in peace. While she made herself a quick sandwich and ate it at the small bar, her thoughts revolved around the handsome handyman.
Something had to give. She gave herself a little pep talk and headed for the shower to rinse the lake water off. No way, she’d sit here whining about his absence. When she emerged from the bathroom almost an hour later, she again noticed the quiet.
Even turning in a circle to encompass the wall of windows, she saw no signs of Rocco or his power tools. What kind of handyman quits working at lunchtime? A lazy one!
But she might as well take advantage of the peace and quiet, and so she called her friend Karen in Santa Clara. After she’d moved to Chicago, they hadn’t talked so much, but she was determined to change this. Maybe Karen could even come up to the mountains?
Back in college both of them had enjoyed hiking and climbing and had become good friends after a rather fateful incident in Yosemite Park. Lee had to grin at the memory. Climbing-newbie Rachel had gone on a hiking trip in place of Karen, just to be dumped in the mountains by her climbing buddy. Marilee and her friends had taken care of her and to the surprise of everyone, grumpy CEO Peter Shaw and lovely college student Rachel Baker came back to Santa Clara as a couple.
Lee sighed. Rachel and Peter had overcome many struggles, but had now been happily married for almost three year. Maybe true love did exist?
“Karen? Hey, it’s Lee.”
“Hey, girl, how’s the cabin and roughing it? Are you relaxing at all up there in the boondocks? Do they have running water and stuff or do you have to use one of the outhouse things?”
Lee chuckled at her description of the cabin. “Karen. This is my uncle’s cabin in Beaver Creek, not one of the shelters we used as students. It’s all very civilized, I assure you. Running water, a microwave, and Internet – it’s like being at home, except for the missing smog, lack of noise, and no shopping malls nearby.”
Karen laughed. “Just teasing you. I hope you relax and find some peace up there. And remember the good old
times, will you?”
“Why don’t you come up here and visit a few days?” Lee asked, looking out at the peaceful landscape.
“Honey, I’d love to. But my job’s crazy right now and I have deadlines – to finish translating two books – until the end of this month.”
“Oh.” Lee was disappointed, but tried not to show it to her friend. “Don’t worry, I’ll be fine. I even started that book you gave me last Christmas, the murder mystery one.”
“You mean the one where the…”
Lee jumped up and interrupted Karen. “Don’t you do it! Don’t you ruin the ending for me. I’m actually enjoying the storyline for once.” Karen giggled again. “I wouldn’t ruin it for you; it’s a great read. And may I say the translation has been done by a real pro.”
Lee grinned. “Do I know this heart-stoppingly perfect translator by any chance?”
“Very funny, girl. Read it. Oh, hey, I’ve gotta go. My mom and dad fly in this evening and I need to go pick them up at the airport. Thanks again for letting them stay in your brother’s apartment while he’s on his college break. Not only is it more affordable for them, but with my dad’s diabetes it’s never good when he has to eat out a lot.”
“Don’t mention it. They’re helping us out and vice versa. Tell them to make themselves at home and feel free to use whatever they can find in the fridge and cupboards.” Lee quickly thought about her younger brother and realized she wasn’t offering them that much. His meals usually consisted of take-out or leftovers from take-out.
“On second thought, you might want to glance in the fridge when you get there and trash whatever take-out containers might still be left. You might want to take them by the market as well, or the fridge will be almost empty.”
“Don’t worry so much. I know him, remember? I already went by there, cleaned out the fridge, and put actual food, the kind that you have to cook on the stove, in there. I might even leave some for when he gets back. Who knows, he might go wild and decided to learn how to turn the stove on one of these days.”
“I wouldn’t hold your breath on that one. We both know my brother. He’s a lost cause.”
“Love you. Call me next week, okay?”
“Sure. Tell your mom and dad ‘Hi’ for me.”
“I will. Bye.”
Lee listened as Karen hung up the phone. Now she had an entire evening ahead of her, with no work to do. She didn’t even remember how this felt like. For the last three years she had worked nonstop.
Maybe she’d run into town and check out the local social life. It couldn’t be any more boring than staying here all alone.
Chapter 7
Rocco sat at the bar in TJ’s Bar and Grill and ordered another round. After leaving the lake, he had decided to call it quits for the day. Marilee Taylor had gotten under his skin. The high-strung, uppity gal had the body of a siren, but she was definitely what he’d consider high maintenance.
Her opinions about marriage had surprised him. Didn’t all women want to tie a man down and get a rope around his neck? Little Miss Taylor definitely seemed different, and that fact alarmed him.
He had no use for marriage and the trappings that went with it. After being cuckolded by his former girlfriend, he had sworn off all relationships that lasted beyond a night or two. He liked being on his own and calling all the shots.
Thoughts of her sent a searing pain through his chest and he gulped down his entire drink. Everything to forget. To stop feeling the pain. She’d wanted to experience freedom and adventure before they tied themselves down to full-time jobs.
Against his family and friends’ advice, he’d agreed to take a year off after college. Supposedly to travel the world. With her.
Worst decision of his life.
It had turned out to be a complete disaster. Not only had he lost his chance at his dream career, but his girlfriend had stolen him blind after cheating on him with every Tom, Dick, and Harry in the country. He’d been blind to her shenanigans until it had been too late. And now he sat here in a sorry existence, unable to get his shit together.
Rocco ordered another beer, wallowing in self-loathing, when he noticed the cute little redhead sidling up behind him. He met her eyes in the mirror behind the bar and waited to see if she was bold enough to make the first move. He liked playing the cat and mouse game, wondering which one he would get to be tonight; from the looks of her, he would definitely be playing cat.
“Hey there, wanna buy a girl a drink?” Susie was a regular at the bar and Rocco had seen her around a time or two. She was cute, with just enough body going on to keep his interest.
“Sure.” He turned around on the barstool to face her, looked her up and down, and then nodded at the bartender to take her order. After that was taken care of, he gestured to the empty stool beside him, which she promptly climbed up on.
“So what’s your name?” Susie said with her flirtiest smile. He grinned; the night was young and he was fair game as far as she was concerned.
“Name’s Rocco – what’s yours, sweetheart?”
“Sweetheart works for me.” Susie gave him a saucy grin. “No, really, the name’s Susan, but everybody calls me Susie.”
“Well, Susie, it’s nice to meet you. I take it you’re here alone tonight?”
“I always start the night alone, but rarely does it stay that way. How ’bout you? Am I poaching on anyone else’s territory?” Susie asked.
“And what if you are?” Rocco asked, moving closer to her.
“Well, I guess that depends upon two things.”
“Which are?” he asked. This was getting a lot more interesting than he’d given her credit for.
“Can I take her in a fight and is she as good-looking as I am?” Susie batted her eyelashes and shimmied her shoulders at him.
Rocco threw back his head and laughed. The girl had guts; he’d give her that. “How about we play a few rounds of pool?”
“I’m game. I’ll even rack ’em.” Susie slipped off the barstool and sauntered over to the pool table. Her hips sashayed back and forth a little extra and she looked back over her shoulder at him as she bent at the waist to retrieve the pool balls.
Rocco watched her put on a show for him and then shrugged. While grabbing his beer to follow her, he decided the day had just gotten a whole lot better. There was nothing like great flirting, maybe more, to help him forget the fox sitting up the hill in the cabin.
He took his first turn, sinking both the four and the two balls. His second turn came up short and he stepped back to allow Susie her turn. With his beer in hand, he watched her cute little ass wiggling for him, as he heard the front door open and glanced towards it, a hot tingle rushing down his spine in reaction.
***
Lee stepped into the bar and stopped for a moment so her eyes could adjust to the dim lighting. Not as bad as she’d feared. The place was actually quite nice, half diner, half bar. At this early hour not many people populated the place and she seated herself at the bar to order a screwdriver.
She wasn’t a heavy drinker and had never developed a taste for beer. Fruit juice and vodka were her poison of choice, and maybe a nice glass of white wine. Other than that, she was lightweight and stayed away from alcohol as much as possible.
As she took the first sip of her drink, she turned on the barstool to survey the remainder of the bar. The stage was still empty and canned music played over the speakers. So far, so good. But as she glanced to her left, she almost spit out the sip of her drink when she caught sight of Rocco standing near the pool table, staring straight at her.
Off course. Her nemesis had to be here. He seemed to be with a redhead, who finished her turn and spoke to him, indicating it was his turn to shoot. But he never even looked at her, just kept staring at Lee. After several seconds, he retrieved his pool cue and took his eyes off her just long enough to scratch, sending the cue ball straight into a pocket.
The redhead giggled and wiggled her backside at him as she positioned h
erself, lying halfway across the table, to take her next turn. Lee had to grin at her obvious attempts to gain Rocco’s attention; he wasn’t even watching. He’d resumed his stance next to the wall and observed Lee.
She suddenly remembered how he’d stared at her this morning, when she was stark naked, and felt the blood rushing to her cheeks – and between her legs. A dull throb spread across her body and to make matters worse, her nipples stood high as mountains against her flimsy bra and shirt.
Lee raised one eyebrow at him and nodded her head toward the pool table, before she quickly turned away and observed the unfolding scene in the mirror behind the bar.
The redhead was more than slightly upset when she figured out his attention was no longer on her, but on another woman. After her initial attempt to flirt her way back into his focus was a complete failure, she got right in Rocco’s face, calling him a few choice words, and flounced off.
She made a beeline to Lee’s barstool and tossed her head. “You’re welcome to have him. I’m out here. No time for losers.”
Now, Lee couldn’t contain her grin anymore. Looking back at Rocco, she found him, beer in hand, headed directly toward her with an answering grin on his face. And right in this moment she wanted to believe he could be a nice man under the rough and obnoxious shell.
“You know how to make friends everywhere, don’t you?” she teased him.
“She’ll get over it. So what are you doing slumming in here?” Rocco’s glance on her made her nipples tighten even more, and she wished for a concealing sweater.
“Slumming? As least I waited until after work hours before hitting the bar,” she said.
“Touché. Although I don’t punch a clock. Your uncle’s paying me for the job, not by the hour.”
Holding her hands up, Lee said, “Sorry, let’s call a truce for the evening. I didn’t mean to imply you weren’t doing your job, whatever it is.”
