by Kelly Oram
Just then there was a loud knock on the door, and my mother’s worried voice called out to me. I looked up at Grayson and in a moment of sheer panic didn’t think twice before jumping behind the curtain with him.
“Whoa! Avery! I was only teasing!”
I could hear Grayson, but I couldn’t really respond. I leaned my back against the cold tile wall and closed my eyes, letting the hot water rain down on me.
There was another knock, louder this time, and then the door opened. “Avery? That you in here, sweetie?”
I frantically shook my head, praying that Grayson would do the right thing.
“Sorry, Kaitlin. It’s just me.”
“Oh. Sorry, Grayson. I thought maybe you were Avery.”
“Yeah, I get that a lot,” he teased.
My mom laughed and then sighed heavily. “If you see her after you’re done, tell her I’m looking for her.”
“Will do.”
The door clicked shut and things got quiet. I stood there for so long that my head started to hurt and I got really dizzy. My knees buckled.
Grayson quickly caught me under the arms. “Avery, breathe,” he commanded.
I took a breath. As oxygen flooded my lungs, I realized it was probably the first breath I’d taken in minutes. Literally.
“Aves,” a low steady voice said. I felt hands on either side of my face.
I opened my eyes, and Grayson’s beautiful piercing blue ones were staring down at me from just inches away, taking up my entire field of vision. “You good now?” he asked.
I may have been breathing, but I would never be “good” again. I flung my arms around him and began to release gut-wrenching sobs into his chest.
I have no idea how long I stayed like that, holding onto Grayson for dear life while I shattered from the inside out. However long it was, Grayson never tried to stop me. He held me close and rocked me beneath the spray of the hot water, all the while whispering encouraging sentiments to me and stroking my hair.
Eventually the anxiety attack faded, and I regained control of myself. Of course, that’s when I realized I was standing in the shower clinging to a very naked Grayson Kennedy and that certain parts of him were not objecting to the situation.
I gasped and tried to wrench myself away from him, but he held me tight and chuckled. “It is what it is, Aves. I’m a warm-blooded guy standing naked in a shower, holding a girl whose t-shirt is drenched and clinging rather poetically to her surprisingly impressive figure.”
This time when I gasped, Grayson let me go. He was still laughing long after I scrambled out of the tub. I didn’t feel bad when I stole his towel and left him to fend for himself when he was ready to get out.
(Yeah, you read that right. If Avery gets one of these nifty prologue thingies to explain herself, then so do I. She’s not the only one with a story to tell here!)
Grayson
First of all, let the record show that journals are completely lame. I’ll probably get gyneco-whatever-it-was just for owning the stupid thing.
Secondly—and this is the more important point I need to make in my one-of-a-kind-totally-brilliant extra prologue—Avery’s experiment is a load of crap.
Avery Shaw is not really suffering from an actual broken heart. Oh, she’s hurt for true. No doubt my idiot little brother messed her up good, for which he will receive a proper beating someday, I promise you that. But Avery was not really in love with Aiden and, therefore, is not suffering from a true broken heart.
What Avery is really suffering from is a heaping load of rejection and a detrimental dose of codependence.
Avery and Aiden are a truly whacked-out case. Our moms screwed them both out of any chance at normalcy long before they were ever born. Of course Avery loves Aiden, but she has no freaking clue what it means to be in love with someone. She only thinks she does. Her perspective is unbelievably skewed in the direction of Crazytown.
To Avery, Aiden is familiar and safe. She translates those feelings of security into being in love with him because it’s easier than seeing them for what they really are—a crutch she uses to cope with her shyness and social anxiety issues.
So, you see, her theory that she is going to magically cure herself by experiencing the seven stages of grief is total bull. Luckily, she has a partner on this project that is not as dumb as everyone thinks he is. I am going to fix her with an experiment of my own.
While Avery is going through her deluded journey of getting over my brother—which, again, I am fully supportive of and will do whatever work she needs me to—I will be doing all the real work behind the Avery Shaw Experiment.
When I’m through with her, Avery Shaw will be a fully-functional, beautiful, self-confident, emotionally-stable young woman who is ready to experience actual real love, with or without her precious seven stages of grief.
Also, my baby brother will forever regret the day he made the stupidest mistake of his life.
Grayson
Where does one even begin when talking about Avery Shaw? I’ve known her, her whole life, and yet I’ve never really gotten to know her.
She and her mom have been unofficial members of my family since our moms threw up on each other in a prenatal yoga class when I was fourteen months old. They only got closer after Avery’s dad skipped town when Avery was four. My family sort of adopted them, and my father took his place as the only male role model in Avery’s life.
I always looked at her as sort of pesky little sister, but that all changed the day my brother dumped her. Why, you ask? Let me put it this way: When a girl lets you be the one to hold her as her entire world falls apart, even though you’re ass naked, it changes the way you see her.
The soaking-wet, see-through t-shirt didn’t hurt, either.
It took me a while to get out of the shower after Avery finally left. I had to let the water run cold first because, well, because I had to. Plus, I needed some time to process. Avery Shaw had suddenly barged into so much more than just my shower. She’d also crashed into my head in a way I never thought possible and maybe even wormed her way into my heart a little bit. I had no freaking clue how to handle that, much less what to do about it. But I had to do something. Avery was destroyed and completely incapable of fixing herself.
That was the moment the Avery Shaw Experiment started for me. It wasn’t defined yet, and I had no idea I’d be earning extra credit for it—that was an added bonus—but that was the first time I realized Avery Shaw had the potential to be so much more than what she was. All she needed was a little help from someone normal and cool who could introduce her to life the way it’s supposed to be lived.
I decided, as I cooled off in the shower that day, that I was going to fix Avery Shaw. I was going to help her get over her dependency on my brother and turn her into a normal, socially-competent person by showing her how the world really worked.
I was going to start by making her celebrate New Year’s Eve the right way—at a real party, on a real date, with a real kiss at midnight. I was excited about it too. No joke, when I got dressed that night, I looked in the mirror and was like, “Watch out, Avery Shaw. Grayson Kennedy is about to change your life.”
Well somebody had to.
No surprise, I found her in bed buried deep beneath the covers. I sat down near the head-shaped end of the lump under the quilt, and her croaky all-cried-out voice said, “Please, just go away, Mom. I don’t want to talk about it right now.”
I don’t know why, but that made me smile. “Good, because listening really isn’t one of my strong points.”
I could practically feel the horror radiating out of her when she realized it was me. “Go away, Grayson!” she shrieked. “Haven’t I already seen enough of you for one night?”
I’ve always teased her about the boy/girl stuff because it’s too easy to make Little Miss Prude blush. But had the girl always been so hilariously cute?
“You had your eyes closed the entire time,” I teased. “You didn’t see anything inte
resting.”
“Well, I definitely felt it!”
I laughed again. I knew I should probably drop it, but I couldn’t help myself. “I’m well aware of what you felt, Aves. I was feeling plenty right then too. Obviously. So, was it as good for you as it was for me?”
“Ugh! You really are made of hormones! Just go away and let me die!”
I backed off before she had a stroke. “No can do, girlie. There’s a wild New Year’s Eve party over at the resort with our names on it.”
I knew she wouldn’t say anything, but I paused and gave her the chance anyway before I said, “Unless you’d rather spend the evening with the rents and my idiot little brother, drowning in awkward silences and avoiding all eye contact, because you know there is no way our moms will let you hide out in this room all night. I heard them discussing removal strategies not two minutes ago.”
I actually hadn’t, but I was sure that’s what they were doing.
Avery knew it was true too, because she threw the covers off her face and glared at me.
“Come on, Aves. Let’s go before they make us do the dishes.”
Slowly her glare faded into a wary look. “I don’t really have anything to wear to a party.”
I’d seen Avery in everything from jeans to pajamas to dresses to swimsuits, but as I let my eyes slide over her then, it was as if I was seeing her for the first time.
Avery’s never going to win the award for hottest girl in school, but she’s definitely cute. She seems tiny compared to my hulking six-foot-four, hundred-and-eighty-five-pound self, but I think standing next to each other, we have the same effect that a big old golden retriever and a kitten would. Somehow it just works.
She has decent hair—light brown and straight. It goes nicely with her pale skin and light smattering of freckles. She also has a cute little button nose, but her most attractive feature, aside from the amazing rack I’d just discovered, was definitely her big, expressive eyes. They were a vibrant blue very similar to my own, but she never guarded them. You could always see right into her soul. That was the one thing I had always noticed about her before. She was always so honest. All you had to do was look closely and her eyes would tell you everything you wanted to know. That’s a rare thing in girls. At least it is in all the ones I’ve ever dated.
“Just put on whatever you have that’s warm,” I said.
I started to leave the room, but she stopped me at the door. “Grayson?” Her tone tugged at something inside me. “You really want to take me with you tonight?”
She sounded so small and unsure of herself. It was how she always sounded at school and around strangers but never when she was at home with us. I think my brother had really broken her. I was seriously going to have to beat him sometime.
“You don’t have to if you don’t want to. I know I really freaked out on you earlier, but I promise I’ll be fine. Aiden’s right.” She swallowed back a lump in her throat. “I’ll manage without him somehow.”
“Aiden’s a tool. You can learn how to manage tomorrow. Tonight’s New Year’s Eve, and for once in your life, you’re going to spend it without Aiden or The Discovery Channel.”
I knew I was making progress when she cracked a smile and asked, “What about Whootylicious in 7B?”
I thought of the luscious booty I’d originally planned on seeing tonight and sighed. “That will be an unfortunate loss, but, like you, I will just have to deal.”
I winked and then decided I’d give her ten minutes before I came back and physically dragged her out of bed.
She didn’t make me wait that long. She emerged after only five minutes dressed in a pretty dark-blue sweater dress, skinny jeans, and knee-high black boots. The belt she wore over the sweater showed off her tiny waist and called just the right amount of attention to that glorious chest of hers. Seriously, how had I never noticed that before?
“You look really nice,” I blurted, unable to hide my surprise.
The compliment startled her. She blushed and looked at her feet as she mumbled, “I need to blow my hair dry.”
I grinned. “Don’t want to have to explain to anyone how it got wet, eh?”
She turned even brighter red but then glared at me. “I just don’t want my hair to freeze.”
I laughed as I threw my hands up in surrender and then laughed even harder when she stalked past me into the bathroom.
I leaned against the door and watched, curiously, as she dried her hair. There was something oddly fascinating about watching Little Avery Shaw primp. She’d never seemed like such a real girl to me before. She wasn’t so little anymore, either.
She caught me staring at her in the mirror, so I quickly said, “I thought dorks were supposed to have bad hair and horrible, frumpy fashion senses.”
“Just because I enjoy learning doesn’t mean I’m a dork,” she said, insulted.
“Two words for you Aves: science club.”
Avery sucked in a breath, and I realized that the science club might not be the best topic of discussion tonight.
“Words that are no longer allowed to be repeated for the rest of the night,” I said quickly. I prayed she wouldn’t start crying again.
Avery slowly let the air out of her lungs and then put down the hair drier. As she brushed her hair into place, I had a strong urge to touch it. Then she coated her lips with a light layer of shiny pink gloss that smelled delicious, and I was the one sucking in a breath. My mouth had suddenly gone dry.
“Okay, I’m ready.”
She turned and looked up at me as if wondering what my problem was. Hell if I knew. We shared one small moment of intimacy, and suddenly the girl had my insides turning to mush. She had no idea how close I was to kissing her right then.
“Uh, Grayson?”
“Hmm?”
I pulled my head out of my butt just in time to watch Avery’s cheeks get all pink again. Man she was cute like that. “Right. Sorry. Okay. So prepare yourself. Everyone’s downstairs, and it’s going to be awkward as hell until we can get out the door. Think you can make it?”
She hesitated but then nodded. The action was quick and jerky like a little bit of the panic she felt earlier was creeping back in.
I forced her to keep her eyes focused on me. “Hey. I’m right here. If you need to, just keep your head down and let me do all the talking.”
I took her hand when it became apparent that her feet wouldn’t start walking on their own. Her fingers automatically curled around mine. She was starting to tremble, so I hurried her downstairs before she had any more time to work herself into another panic attack. I dragged her straight over to the front door, grabbed her coat off the hook, and held it out for her to slip her arms into.
“Where are you guys off to?” my dad asked, being the first one to notice us.
Heads turned our direction and the air in the room turned thick and heavy. I felt the stares every bit as much as Avery did, but I didn’t pause in my efforts to bundle her up. I zipped her coat, then reached for her hat and scarf.
“We’re just going to go walk around town for a bit, grab some hot cocoa, and maybe head over to the resort in time to catch the fireworks.”
Scarf now securely in place, I plopped Avery’s hat on her head. Our eyes met and I whispered, “We’re almost free. You’re doing great.” I was shocked when I received a small smile from her.
Avery put on her gloves, while I grabbed my own coat. As I quickly shoved my hat on my head, Aiden finally opened his big, stupid mouth. “You’re taking out Avery?”
My jaw clenched. I knew it was too much to hope to just get out of there without anyone saying anything. The fact that it was Aiden bringing it up, along with the incredulity in his voice that made it sound as if Avery wasn’t good enough to be my date for the evening, pissed me off way more than I’d expected it would.
I felt insanely protective of Avery all a sudden. Instead of just walking out the door like I probably should have, I turned around and gave my brother a defiant
look. “Is that a problem?”
Aiden’s eyes narrowed on me. “It’s just out of character. He flicked his gaze to Avery. “For both of you.”
As if he could talk about acting out of character. My hands clenched into fists, matching the tension in my jaw. “You’re the one who told her she needed to start hanging out with other people, and since when is it out of character for me to want to spend the evening with a beautiful girl?”
Aiden’s face flashed with pure rage, but I stared him down. If he tried to argue that statement in any way, I was going to lay him out.
I must have been pretty obvious because the adults all chose that exact moment to intervene.
“Be back by twelve thirty.”
“You haven’t had dinner yet!”
“Take your cell phones!”
I sputtered as I tried to figure out what everyone just said. “We’ll get some dinner while we’re out, Kaitlin. And Dad, come on. It’s New Year’s Eve. One o’clock.”
My dad rolled his eyes. “One,” he agreed grudgingly. “But only because it’s Avery, and I trust her to keep you out of trouble.”
Normally I would argue that, but I just wanted to get poor Avery out of there. I grabbed her hand and whirled around toward the door. “Thanks, Dad!”
We’d almost escaped and then my mom said, “Grayson you come over here and give your mother a kiss goodbye before you go.”
Suppressing a sigh, I grinned at my mom. “Last time I did that, you said it was bad manners.”
The look she gave me said she wasn’t in the mood, so I obeyed with no more arguments. “Thank you,” she whispered as she brushed her lips on my cheek.
I pulled back and Kaitlin was right there, waiting for her turn to hug me. This was not a standard practice every time I left the house by any stretch. This was our moms, the worry twins, inwardly gushing over my rescuing Avery, so I wrapped my arms around Avery’s mom and gave her an exaggerated bear hug. “Happy New Year, Kaitlin!”
