Allowing myself to be vulnerable for a moment, I look up at the side of his face as we walk. “Do you think we can really pull this off, Cade? Are we going to royally screw up and get a bunch of good people killed?”
His jaw clenches underneath his scruffy five o’clock shadow and he stares straight ahead, mulling over my questions.
“I believe we’ll be successful, Sunshine. I have to. But I can’t say I’m not worried someone will get hurt. That’s inevitable.” Glancing down, a twinkle enters his gaze as he stares at me through his long, beautiful lashes. “We’ll fuck a lot of assholes up along the way though. No doubt.”
“No doubt,” I echo with a wicked grin. Yes the fuck we will.
CHAPTER 28
Two days later, one of the teenage boys I used to send to Old Man Wilson’s with food approaches me as I’m walking back from showering. I have my wet towel slung across one shoulder, over my coat, and it’s so cold outside the cloth is beginning to stiffen as the water in it turns to ice.
Winter’s here early and it’s a beast, just as predicted.
“Miss Walton?” The boy’s squeaky voice reaches my ears as he falls into step beside me.
Offering him a smile in greeting, I keep my eyes focused forward. “What’s up, Chuck?”
I’d been calling him that since I met him, though his real name is Kirk or something like that. He’s a pipsqueak, but he reminds me of the old Ranger I used to watch re-runs of. He’s scrappy, but knows how to hold his own. I’m sure when he’s older he’ll be similar in stature to Cade. He just needs to grow into his body a little bit more.
He clears his throat to keep his voice from cracking — puberty is a bitch. “Mr. Duncan asked me to tell you he needs to meet. This afternoon, three o’clock. He said you’d know the place.” Um, no I don’t. Noticing my confusion, he adds, “Something about a janitor. I don’t remember, sorry.”
The storage closet? Really?
Patting the kid on the back of his puffy coat, I ruffle his short hair in a playful way. “No worries. Thank you for letting me know.”
“Yeah.” He keeps pace with me for another few strides, and I can tell there’s something else he wants to say.
“What is it? You know I don’t bite.” I smile again, hoping the friendly expression will get him to open up. It probably comes out more of a grimace, but I can’t help that — there’s too much going on right now.
It’s a wasted gesture anyway, since he’s too busy watching his feet as we stroll along the frosted sidewalk. We’ve gone in one giant circle around the quad at this point, but I don’t think he’s noticed that either, he’s so caught up dancing around whatever is weighing on him. “Jimmy and me haven’t been by Old Man Wilson’s place in a long time.” He confesses, peeking up at me from under his messy bangs. I nod my head, encouraging him to go on. This isn’t news to me, but he doesn’t know that. “I was just wonderin’ if he’s okay? Is he mad at me?”
Cue kick in the gut. It’s a struggle keeping my expression neutral, and I can’t meet his gaze. I can’t tell this kid that Mr. Wilson is being held against his will by the crazed leaders of the very sanctuary where he rests his head at night. I won’t traumatize him like that…. There’s already too much kids have to deal with these days. And who’s to say he’ll even believe me? I deflect — it’s the best I can think of. “He’s not mad, Chuck. I’m sure he hasn’t even had the time to think about being upset with you.”
My words are like a sieve, siphoning off the pressure resting on his young shoulders. I can visibly see him getting lighter. “Really? You think so?”
“Really.”
He smiles, nodding his acceptance. “Okay, well… I better go. Ma asked me to bring her some scrap fabric from an old lady in Dorm 2. She’s making new coveralls for the guards to go scouting. Keep ‘em from getting any gore on their skin when they kill Zerks.”
Graphic images fill my head of why they’d need to use such a thing. Dad’s covered face the day he showed up to save me flashes, too, haunting me. “That’s good. Hurry along then. See ya, Chuck!” I force some cheerfulness out for his sake, so he doesn’t start worrying again. He’s a decent kid. I think Jer will grow up to be similar — he’s already shaping up to be a better person than our sole living ‘parent’.
Getting myself back on track, I step off the giant square of a walking path that goes around the inside of the quad and onto the sidewalk that leads to the Observatory.
My hair is in the same state as the towel by the time I reach my door. I probably should have stuck around and borrowed one of the few blow dryers lying about in the showers, but I’d wanted to get back quickly to see if Kenji had made any progress with John. She’d been working on him all morning, trying to get him to teach her to shoot. He insisted a computer nerd didn’t need to have that particular skill, but that he’d show her some basic defensive moves if she wanted.
No doubt she’s weaseled her way into getting exactly what she wants by now.
It’s probably a good thing I didn’t dawdle, though. I don’t think Chuck was waiting for me on the quad, so if I hadn’t come by when I did, I likely would have missed him, since he doesn’t know where I live anymore.
Cade’s packing his duffel when I walk in but makes sure to give me a sweet smile when I pass by him on my way to search for something dry to wrap around my hair. I’m fucking cold.
Kenji’s in the back of the room near the control panel, with John, a pistol in her hand as he shows her how to flick the safety on and off.
Called that one.
The other two, Charlie and Lance, are once again pouring over the crude drawings of the lab I’d scraped together for them, murmuring quietly to each other.
Snatching a clean t-shirt from a folded pile near my pallet, I flip my hair upside down, letting the thawing tips drip on the floor for a second as I maneuver the fabric up and around the long strands, twisting them into a dense roll before flicking the whole mass back to rest atop my head and down my back as I stand upright once more.
I catch Cade staring at my butt on the way up and smirk. He’s kind of an ass guy. I’m not complaining.
Strutting my way over to his side, I add a little extra swing to my hips just to tease him. As I fill him in on Luca’s requested meeting, some of the heat bleeds out of his green eyes, but not all of it. Damn I wish we were alone right now.
“I’m going with you.” It’s a statement, not a request.
Shaking my head, I quickly put a lid on that idea. “You can’t. For one, the room isn’t big enough for all of us - which is beside the point - but secondly, he may not be as open with whatever he needs to say if you’re there, too.”
He mulls over my logic, and I can see the moment he decides I’m right. He sighs, dropping his shoulders a little. “I get it, but I don’t have to like it. You’re not going alone though.” I go to protest, but he raises a hand for me to wait. “I’ll go with you to the building, but I’ll wait in the cafeteria until you’re done. Pretend like I’m hungry or something.”
He won’t need to pretend — this man could eat enough for a small army. I like his plan though, so I agree. I’d rather have him close by anyway, in case this is a set up. Luca’s probably still butt-hurt over our last exchange.
“Okay.”
My easy acceptance of his protective behavior seems to make him happy, and I’m glad I agreed so quickly.
◆◆◆
I insist on waiting until my hair is mostly dry before leaving to go meet Luca. It’d be just my luck to be immune to ODR, but get struck down by another illness for being stupid about the weather. When I’m satisfied I won’t catch cold, I head out before Cade, leaving him to trail behind at his own pace.
I can feel his eyes on my back, but he’s good at being discreet. I don’t see him following me.
I only hope Luca is as good at staying hidden when he doesn’t want people to know what he’s doing. If we’re truly ‘being watched’ this meeting is risky.
Entering the hallway at the back of the cafeteria building, I make sure no one is wandering about as I sneak up to the closed closet door. The handle gives when I twist, and I quickly step inside.
The brief glimpse into the room while the door was open leaves an after image of Luca standing along the back wall in my head. He’s sporting new bruises again, but for once, I’m not interested in asking why.
“Didn’t think you’d come.” He sounds anxious - frustrated even. “I was about to leave.”
I shrug, knowing he can’t see me. “I came as soon as I was able. Why did you want me here?”
He doesn’t waste my time with useless chit-chat. “I’ve got the sedatives.” Thank fuck. I hear the shuffling of fabric and I sense he’s moved closer to me in the small space. I wish we could turn the light on. I hate this cloak and dagger bull. “Hold out your hand.”
It isn’t a request, but I find myself hesitating. He hasn’t mentioned the last time we ‘talked’ at all, and I’m swayed to believe that’s because he’s past it, but I also don’t want to be gullible. “Why?”
He releases an exasperated breath. “Because I’m trying to hand you a set of keys for the Subject’s central cage box. You seem to do well with passcodes, so I didn’t bother swiping those, but you’ll need these to get into the box that has the keypad inside.”
“Huh?” He’s making sense and he isn’t. We need a keycode, but we don’t, because you have to use a regular key? “Break it down in layman's terms, Luca. I’m not getting what you’re trying to say.”
I can feel his impatience from here, but he can deal. Details are important. “At the bottom of the stairs to the lab, when you turn to your right, there’s a metal box affixed to the wall. It has a radiation sticker on the front, but that’s just a decoy.” He jingles the keys he must still be holding in the air. “These unlock an industrial padlock on said box. Inside is the digital keypad that controls the cage locks to the Subject’s enclosures.”
I can picture it now. I vaguely remember seeing the sticker when we were down in the lab and worrying we’d be exposed, but it was such a brief thought in the mix of everything going on it hadn’t mattered at the time. He continues on, telling me about how the computers will require a code too, to turn off the trackers implanted in the prisoners, but that he’s written his password down for me to use as long as we have someone who can navigate the system.
Thank the gods for Charlie.
“Here, my hands getting tired, take these.”
Reaching out, I miss the first few times I swing my hand around to find his. When I bump into flesh it’s knee-jerk to flinch, but I just run my fingers down his hand, feeling for the keys and tiny slip of paper before quickly stashing them in my bra for safe-keeping.
Boobs rock. They require a bra to be comfy, but said bra is always a good hiding spot.
“Thanks.” Now for the million-dollar question of the day. “When are you ready to do this then?” I need to know if he’s still with us, and that’s a better way of asking than outright inquiring about where his loyalties lie.
“Tonight.”
A gasp escapes unbidden. I don’t insult him by asking if he’s sure — he wouldn’t have started the clock if he wasn’t. Excited energy rolls through me, making the hairs stand up on my arms. I’m so fucking anxious, it’s hard to keep my voice steady. “Thank you, Luca.” It’s important to me he knows I’m grateful he’s chosen a side — he could have backed out. Hell, he still might. “We’ll meet you at the rendezvous point?”
“I’ll be there at the designated time.” Internally I’m shouting and clapping in celebration — it’s finally time! — externally, I’m cool as a cucumber. Sweaty palms notwithstanding. He pauses, and I wait to see what else he has to say. “Please be careful, Saed. You really don’t know what you’re getting yourself into, but I’m fucking weak enough I don’t even have the energy to try and talk you out of this again. I’m all argued out.” His voice goes quiet, like he’s saying things he doesn’t want to aloud, but has to get them out anyway. “I’m only staying because, despite you not wanting to accept my feelings, I can’t bear to imagine you dead due to my lack of action. I couldn’t live with that on my conscience.” He sucks in a ragged breath. “Don’t fucking die, Saedie Walton.”
“Wasn’t planning on it.” I want to hug him. To ease his pain. But I feel like that would send the wrong signals, and I don’t want to give him hope that there will ever be anything between us. There won’t. “You don’t either.”
A hmm is all I get in reply as I feel for the door handle and, after making sure the coast is clear, dart out of the pitch-black janitor’s closet and into the dimly lit hallway. Even so, the lights are a shock to my retinas, and it takes a second for my eyes to adjust. I don’t wait around for Luca to leave, too. I just haul ass to the cafeteria, loving the feel of the keys digging into my flesh as I move.
The fact they’re poking me - causing me pain - is just proof they exist. Verification that we have the last pieces to the puzzle and we’re ready to get this shit show on the road.
I’m so fucking excited I almost can’t contain myself. I’m positive if I don’t tone it down, people will start to notice. They’re too used to the stoic, reserved Saedie. I haven’t allowed them to see another side of me. Shutting down the grin that’s trying to force its way onto my lips, my eyes scan the room in search of the largest man present.
There. By the outer exit doors. He’s speaking with the little boy Jeremy used to play with in the infirmary, crouched down to the kid’s level so the boy doesn’t have to crane his neck to keep eye contact. They’re smiling and joking with each other about something, and Cade looks so carefree, I feel my eyes wanting to well up at the sight. Cade likes kids.
Awwwww.
When he sees me approaching, Cade hands the little boy a piece of paper, shooing him off in the direction of his mother. She’s smiling at their exchange, and is quick to give the little one a hug when he gets back to her side, listening to him go on and on about something Cade has said.
I love seeing mothers who care.
I sure as hell hope tonight - our mission - doesn’t affect the little family’s lives and safety in any way….
Reaching Cade’s side, he holds out a hand for me to take, gripping me tightly as we leave the room. He doesn’t ask how things went yet, but I know the questions are coming. All in all there’s not much to say beyond us needing to be ready to move time now. I still make sure to detail every second of the meet up with him though, when we get back to the Observatory, because it makes him happy.
I ensure the rest of the guys hear the news as well — watching each of them react. It’s almost creepy how they can go from being carefree at our arrival, to completely shut down in ‘go mode’ at my words.
Lance - Bishop - immediately heads for his duffel to do what has to be the hundredth check to verify he has everything. John begins laying out all the gear we’ll need for the evening, including what look like night vision goggles. So cool. Charlie gets on his phone and shoots off a message to Kenji, asking her to bring over her things so they can transport them to the outpost for later. He’s going to get her advice on the trackers, too, while they’re out.
I didn’t realize there were still so many things we need to set up. I thought we’d covered all our bases before, but with the mission moving up so quickly it’s clear to me we’re going to need to hustle to have everything ready in time.
Better get to it.
CHAPTER 29
Hours later, long after the sun sets behind the clouds, a glacial chill has settled into the darkness. I’m once again crouched behind an ugly bush directly across the street from Nyler’s family house, Cade and John on either side of me, boxing me in.
I’m hyped up, rearing to get inside the place and not leave until I have my siblings wrapped safely in my arms, but we’re waiting. Something isn’t sitting well with me about the house — not fo
r the guys either. There’s only one light on for one thing, way up in the attic room, but the rest of the place is pitch black.
The only reason I know the curtains are open, just like last time, is because a tiny sliver of moonlight has managed to wiggle its way through the dense cloud cover overhead, illuminating the sheer material at the edges of the window frame.
Beyond that? Nothing. Not even a lamp on in the kitchen in case someone wanders down for a snack in the middle of the night.
That’s how we used to keep things Before. Prudence always had the little light over the stove on after dark. Either Nyler doesn’t prescribe to the silly habit, or they aren’t home.
There’s no other reason for it to be so dark. Nyler’s guards would need to be able to see to do their jobs. Right?
Of course. They aren’t raccoons for fuck’s sake.
I absentmindedly rub dad’s necklace, seeking comfort from the warmed metal. I’d kept it tucked away, safe in my room, until we set out for this mission tonight. I want my dad here with me, even if it’s only in spirit.
The guys had watched the place on rotation since getting here four days ago, switching out every few hours. They said one thing was always consistent — even when Nyler isn’t present, there are always guards keeping watch when Prudence and the children are in residence.
What’s different about this night? Why aren’t they hanging out, playing cards or something, to pass the time until morning?
I shuffle, listening to the dead leaves and twigs crunch beneath the balls of my feet, the sound loud in the empty silence of the night. Cade reaches over and stills the nervous movement, pressing an index finger to his lips in a quieting motion.
I’m anxious. I can’t help it.
Using one hand on his thick leg to keep from tipping backward at the odd angle, I lean over and press my lips to the shell of his ear, speaking in the lowest decibel possible. “Why doesn’t this feel right?”
Atlas (Apocalyptic Cries Book 1) Page 29
