“I can’t believe it.” She’s smiling through her tears.
“She told me she was planning on coming home within the next year, but this has just given her incentive to do it quicker.” I waggle my brows, grinning. “And there’s more. She’s already filed paperwork to be granted guardianship of you, and she’s lined up a meeting with a top attorney. She’s determined to get you out of here.”
Zeta sobs, her shoulders heaving as months of stress unload. I want to bundle her into my arms and comfort her, and I hate that I can’t.
“I’m in shock,” she says, half laughing, half crying. “I can’t believe this is really happening.”
“It’s happening, babe. You’re going to get out of here, and we’re going to be together.”
I’ve been on a countdown the last couple of months, trying not to get frustrated at how long it’s taking Zeta’s new attorney to get her conviction quashed. I’ve met her aunt Jillian several times, and she’s also been in to visit her niece. She seems to care a great deal about Zeta, and she’s gone out of her way to set things up so Zeta has a loving home to return to now she’s been awarded guardianship of her niece. They are slowly getting to know one another, and while Jillian isn’t privy to all the facts of Zeta’s unhappy childhood, she’s smart enough to fill in the gaps. I can tell she feels tremendous guilt for abandoning her niece, and I think she’ll go out of her way to make it up to Zeta.
Zeta doesn’t turn eighteen for another four months, which means she won’t be able to live with me from the outset of her release, but I can wait. At least, I’ll be able to see her every day, and it’ll give me more time to save for a nicer place. I’ve managed to get extra shifts in the restaurant most weeks, and I’ve been busking every Saturday afternoon in the city center, gathering a loyal little following who are happy to throw some cash my way. Every cent counts, and I take very little for myself, putting as much as I can aside so that I have enough to look after my girlfriend when she gets out.
Jillian called me while I was on the bus en route here telling me the good news, and I’m so fucking excited to see my girl, knowing she’s going to be out soon. I have the goofiest grin on my lips as I sit down in front of the plexiglass screen, picking up the phone.
“You heard the news?” Zeta is smiling and staring at me with so much joy on her face.
“Two weeks, baby! You’re going to court in two weeks, and your aunt said the attorney is one hundred percent certain you’ll be granted release straightaway.”
“Thanks to you.” She places her palm on the glass, and my hand instantly lines up on this side.
“Fuck. I need to kiss you so badly. I’ve missed kissing you so much. I’ve just missed you. Period.”
“I’ve missed you too, and when I get out, I’m never going to stop kissing you.”
“You say that like it’s a bad thing,” I tease.
“Thank you, Ryder.” Her eyes well up. “I know you found Clive. I know you were the one who convinced him to tell the truth about what happened that night.”
I shrug. “I told you I’d do anything to get you out of here, and I meant it. Clive knows he’ll get control of Bob’s business once he’s locked up, so he didn’t take much convincing. He was outside the door long enough to hear exactly how it went down, and he saw what Bob did to your Mom. It’s open and shut now.”
Tears spill down her cheeks. “Do you have any idea how much I love you, Ryder Stone? There are no words in existence in the English language to adequately describe how full of love my heart is for you. I can never repay you for this.”
“Sure you can. You can agree to be my wife.” I wasn’t planning on proposing, but I’ve thought about it a lot. Her mouth hangs open and shock splashes across her gorgeous features. “I’m not saying I want us to get married straightaway,” I rush to assure her, “because I’m not in a position to provide for you yet, but as soon as I can give you the lifestyle you deserve, I’m putting a ring on it unless you tell me you don’t want that with me?” A sharp ache pierces my chest as I wait for her to respond.
“Of course, I want that with you! Nothing would make me happier than to be your wife.”
I press my lips to the glass, and she does the same. Closing my eyes, I can almost pretend that I feel her mouth moving against mine. “I can’t wait to bury myself balls deep inside you,” I whisper into the phone. “I’m going to worship every inch of your body and make you scream my name all night long.”
She shudders and her pupils darken. “I want you so much I ache all the time.”
“Believe me, baby, I know. But we don’t have long left to wait.”
We make plans for the day she gets out, and I promise I’ll be outside those gates, waiting to swoop her up into my arms. Then I tell her over and over how much I love her before Powell has to physically drag me from the room.
I’m whistling as I make my way out of the gates, walking in the direction of the bus stop, feeling on top of the fucking world. Nightfall is encroaching, and the darkening sky casts shadows on the sidewalk as I advance toward the bus stop with a new spring in my step.
Without warning, I’m yanked sideways into an alley and shoved hard against the wall. “Well, well, would you look who it is,” says the voice from my nightmares. He grabs me around the throat with both hands before I have any time to react.
My lungs constrict, and I’m gasping for air as his chokehold tightens. He slams my head back into the brick wall, rattling my bones. “I’ve been waiting for this day for years.” His lips are curved into a sneer, his pungent breath slapping me in the face as he opens his mouth, flashing his yellowed teeth. “I should fucking end you right now.” Hatred burns the backs of his eyes as he bores a hole in my skull.
My lungs are seizing up, and my limbs twitch as I struggle to get free. He drops me abruptly, and I slump to the ground, banging my hip off the hard stone although I barely feel it, because I’m too busy sucking air down. “Get up, asshole.” He kicks me in the gut, and when I don’t stand, he grabs hold of my shirt, yanking me up.
“Fuck you.” I push at his chest, grateful I’ve been lifting weights and have decent upper body strength. We face off, both of us glaring at one another. “What the fuck do you want, and how the fuck did you find me?”
“Payback, and that’s for me to know.”
“Payback?! Are you kidding me?” My nostrils flare up.
He slams his fist into my gut, punching me several times, winding me. “Do I look like I’m fucking around?!” he snarls. “You screwed us all over, and now it’s time to pay up.”
“Get lost, asshole. I owe you nothing,” I pant. Straightening up, I summon strength from somewhere, shoving him in the chest repeatedly, snarling in his ugly face as I push him back down the alley. “The terms of our release were conditional on staying away from one another. I can report you and have you locked up just like that.” I click my fingers in midair.
He rams his fist in my face, and blinding pain lances through my skull as I stumble back, clutching my bloody nose. “I wouldn’t go slinging threats around if I were you.” The look he pins on me is pure evil, and chills tiptoe up my spine. Extracting a cell from his back pocket, he thrusts it in my throbbing face. “Wouldn’t want your girl paying the price for your mistakes, now would we?”
My stomach flip-flops as I stare at the image of Zeta in the yard. It’s date-stamped this week. Adrenaline courses though me, fueled by anger and fear. Grabbing him into a headlock, I slam him into the wall, rage pummeling my insides. “You leave her the fuck out of this!” I shout. “If one hair on her head is harmed, I will fucking end you!!”
He jabs his elbow into my rib cage, and all the air flees my lungs. Pushing me back into the wall, he wraps his hand around my throat again. “You’re in no position to make demands.”
“What do you want?” I splutter, grabbing hold of his arms and trying to
loosen his grip on me.
“Everything. I want everything. I own you, Ryder.”
“Not the girl,” I rasp, feeling the last trickle of air squeeze out of my lungs. Blood drips down my chin from my nose, creeping under the collar of my shirt. He eyeballs me with those cold, unfeeling eyes of his before letting me go. I rest against the wall, sucking greedy mouthfuls of oxygen into my lungs as I fight to keep my limbs upright. “I’ll do whatever you want, just leave her out of it. She doesn’t know anything.” My tone is resigned.
He stares at me, a muscle ticking in his jaw, as his brain goes into overdrive. “We can make a deal and leave the girl off the table. But if you mess up, if you say no to me, if you try and trap me, the girl takes a bullet.”
CHAPTER 15
Zeta
“Good luck to you, Zeta. Good luck to you both,” Powell says as she unlocks the gates and steps aside.
On instinct, I fling my arms around her in a hug. “Thank you. For everything.”
“I’m glad it’s worked out, and I hope you’re both very happy, because you deserve every happiness. Look after my boy.”
“I will,” I promise, slinging my bag over my shoulder and waving at her. I run toward the parking lot, such is my desire to see my boyfriend, but my aunt’s smiling face is the first familiar face I see.
She pulls me into a tentative hug and promptly bursts into tears. “I’m so happy you’re free of that place,” she says, laughing a little in between her tears.
I slip out of her embrace, a little uncomfortable. While Jill has visited me every week since she returned to the US, we are still virtual strangers. It’s going to take a while for me to feel natural around her even if I’m hugely grateful to her. “Thank you so much for everything you’ve done for me. I don’t know how I can ever repay you.”
“Sweetheart.” She tenderly cups my face, dropping her hand when I shrink back a bit. Her smile falters, but she hides it fast. “We’re family. No thanks or repayment is necessary. I just want you to live your life and be happy. God knows you’ve earned it.” Her lower lip wobbles. “I’m so sorry I wasn’t there for you growing up. I’ll never forgive myself for abandoning you.”
I wet my dry lips. “It’s okay. You didn’t know. She forced you out of our lives and ignored every attempt you made to patch things up. What happened is not on you.”
She swipes a tear away. “I know you haven’t told me the worst of it, and I can’t imagine what you lived through. I hate that I was off the other side of the world living my life in blissful ignorance while you were being neglected and abused. I don’t know how you can bear to look at me.”
“You came through for me when I needed you. That’s all that matters,” I quietly admit.
Jill gave up a lucrative job in IT management to come back to the US. She dropped everything without a moment’s hesitation once she found out my predicament. She’s since bought a house, in Newport Beach, and secured a fancy, new position with a leading technology company.
She takes my bag, smiling again. “C’mon. Let’s go home. I’m dying to show you your bedroom, and Liam is so excited to meet you.”
“We have to wait for Ryder. He promised me he’d be here.”
“Yeah, look, about that.” She shoots me an apologetic look, and my stomach dips to my toes, then somersaults up to my chest and back down again. “He was really upset when he called, but he had to work a double shift, and he couldn’t get out of it. He promised he’d drop by later.”
“Oh, that’s too bad.” I draw a deep breath, forcing my sudden surge of anxiety to settle back down. Naturally, I’m disappointed he’s not here. I had visions of him waiting with outstretched arms and me racing toward him like the pathetic, lovesick fool I am. He didn’t visit last week, because he was working too, and it’s the first time I’ve gone this long without seeing him. I honestly can’t wait a minute longer. “Could we drop by the restaurant on our way home? I want to surprise him.”
“No problem. Let’s go.”
Jill chats animatedly in the car about the new house and her new job in between asking me what my plans are. I graduated with a high school diploma the same time Ryder did, and I always dreamed of studying music, with a major in songwriting, but I never thought it would ever be possible.
Now she’s offering me the opportunity to go to college, and it’s like everything I’ve ever wanted is right there for the taking. It’s a bit overwhelming, if exciting. I want to talk to Ryder before I make any decision, because I know he’s been making plans for us too, and I won’t agree to anything without discussing it so I know we can make it all work.
Not that I think he’ll discourage me from going to college. Quite the opposite, but I want to include him in my plans, because that’s the way relationships should be. I smile as I stare out the window. Listen to me, acting all grown up and shit.
The restaurant is much nicer than I was expecting it to be. It’s an old-school-type steakhouse with leather-backed booths, low lighting, and country music playing in the background. I’m a little nervous as I step inside, but the nice man at the front desk smiles broadly at me and Jill, helping to settle my nerves. “Table for two, ladies?” he asks, pulling out a couple menus.
“Oh, no. We’re not eating,” Jill corrects him.
“I just dropped by to say hi to Ryder, if that’s okay,” I say, smiling.
His whole demeanor changes, and he looks a little flustered. He clears his throat. “Hold tight for a minute.” I watch him retreat across the room, entering into a door marked Staff Only with a renewed surge of anxiety. All the tiny hairs lift on the back of my neck, and an ominous black cloud descends, pressing down on me, elevating my anxiety to coronary-inducing levels.
Something is wrong.
Something is very wrong.
I just feel it in my bones.
An older man with a mop of jet-black hair and a matching thickset mustache approaches us. “You must be Zeta,” he says, and I can only nod. “I’m Stan, and this is my restaurant.”
“Nice to meet you.” I shake his hand, while trying to quell my rising hysteria.
“Ryder left this for you.” He hands me a white envelope with my name scrawled on the front in Ryder’s messy handwriting.
“Left it for me?” My voice comes out all high-pitched and squeaky, but I’m freaking out too badly to care.
His features soften. “I’m guessing he didn’t tell you.”
“Tell me what?” My heart is slamming against my rib cage, and butterflies are going crazy in the pit of my stomach. I feel like I’m going to throw up.
“He’s gone, sweetheart. Barely gave me any notice.”
“Gone where?” I whisper, sure shock and horror is fully displayed on my face.
“He didn’t say, just that he had to leave. I was mighty sorry to see him go. He was a hard worker, and we miss him around the place.”
Blood thrums in my ears, and I’m struggling to hold my tears at bay as I run my fingers across the lettering on the front of the envelope in my hand. I vaguely hear my aunt thanking the man before she wraps her arm around me, escorting me back outside to the car.
I’m in complete shock as I buckle my seatbelt, swiping at the tears silently leaking out of my eyes.
“Don’t react yet,” Jill says, reaching over and squeezing my hand. “Not until you’ve read the letter.”
“He’s left me.” I stare straight ahead, barely able to see through the tears blurring my eyes.
“Zeta, honey. Look at me.” She forces my gaze to hers. “I’m sure there’s a reasonable explanation for this and that he hasn’t left you. At least not permanently. I know him well enough by now to know that young man adores the ground you walk on. I’ve never seen anyone more devoted or so in love. I’m sure it’s fine. Why not open the letter and find out?” she suggests.
I shake my head.
“I’d rather wait until we get home.” So that I can break down in the privacy of my own bedroom if this letter says what I think it’s going to say.
She switches on the radio, working hard to keep my spirits up as we drive to Newport Beach, but I’m lousy company, and I barely even acknowledge her chatter.
The house is a beautiful big family home on a prime site overlooking the magnificent beach, but I barely take in my surroundings or properly acknowledge Jill’s fiancé, Liam, as we meet for the first time. He’s made dinner, and I have to force myself into eating it so I’m not rude. Afterward, I insist on cleaning up, and then Jill shows me to my bedroom.
It’s gorgeous. Painted in duck egg blue and cream with a gigantic four-poster bed, huge walk-in closet, en suite bath, and my own couch and TV, it’s like something from a showhouse or a posh hotel. I thank her, reassuring her that I love it when I see the skeptical look on her face. Before she leaves, she tells me to come and get her if I need her for anything.
I set the envelope down on my bedside table, strip off my clothes, and take a long, hot shower, but I can’t even enjoy the luxury of it because I can’t get the letter off my mind, and I can’t eradicate the horrible sense of dread I feel.
But I can’t avoid reading it forever, so once I’m in my pajamas, tucked up in bed, with a cup of chamomile tea—courtesy of my thoughtful aunt—I slide my finger under the flap of the envelope and remove the contents.
I stare at the folded piece of paper in my lap until my tea turns stone cold. My heart is in my throat as I finally pluck up the courage to open it. With shaking fingers, I start to read.
Zeta,
Writing this letter is one of the hardest things I've ever had to do. There is no easy way to tell you this, but I've left Orange County, and I'm not coming back. I'm sorry I've broken every promise I ever made to you, but you were right-things have changed. I've changed, and with time and distance, I've realized the things I want are different from the things we planned together. I will always love you and always remember our time together as a happy period in my life, but I've moved on. I've met someone else, and I'm moving to be with her. The last thing I ever wanted to do is hurt you, and I hate myself for that. You're destined for great things, Zeta. I know you're going to have an amazing life. Be happy because you deserve all the happiness in the world.
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