Worth the Fight

by Beth Maria

  She’s the reason I’m doing this in the first place. I know it’s going to be hard to ignore her like I’m supposed to, without an explanation either. I mean, what am I supposed to say? ‘Oh yeah, I can’t talk to you anymore because your father threatened to kill me.’ That isn’t going to fly.

  I know the perfect way to make her forget about me, but it’s going to hurt both her and me like hell. I’ve got to do what I’ve got to do though.

  Swallowing and straightening my shoulders, my stance becoming taller, I put on my game face. The face that gives away nothing, no emotion what-so-ever. This is where the new Phoenix James is born. Just like a Phoenix, I’m being reborn from the ashes. Only, I’m being reborn into a monster instead of the person who I want to be.

  I just hope it’s worth it.

  ****

  I chuck my keys on the side table by the front door and kick my shoes off before making my way into the living room and flopping down onto the sofa.

  Seeing Emilia tonight and getting close to her like I’ve wished to do for so long has triggered the memory of why my life went to shit in the first place.

  Damn Nico De Carlo and his power!

  I’m done playing by his rules now. I’m stronger than I’ve ever been. Jesus, I mean, I’m the best cage fighter around, all thanks to his intensive training. I know everybody in the business, and I have a lot of dirt on him. I’m ready to go up against him and ruin him once and for all, claiming my woman in the process.

  For now, we will keep it a secret. One day, in the near future, she will be mine and everybody will know about it, and there will be nobody here to stop me!

  Chapter Fifteen

  “Please tell me that you made coffee for me too,” Zoe whines, walking into the kitchen, holding her head.

  “Of course. How is your head feeling this morning?” I ask, handing over a hot cup of coffee.

  Zoe sits down at my kitchen table big enough for two, placing her coffee down before putting her head in her hands. “I feel like my head has been caved in with a hammer.”

  I laugh. “Sucks to be you.”

  “Can you please turn the volume down? There is no need to shout at this time of the morning.”

  I laugh harder. “Zoe, I’m not shouting. Plus, it’s like eleven o’clock, hardly early.”

  “Eurghh!” She groans, her head hitting the table. “We didn’t get in till about four this morning. Why am I even up? I hate mornings!”

  “I would have pegged you for a morning person. You’re always so bubbly,” I state.

  “You obviously haven’t seen me before I’ve had my morning coffee. I’m like a beast. I’ll snap anybody’s head off who pisses me off. Add a hangover to that mix, and it’s not a good combination.” Her words are muffled.

  “Well, did you have a good time though?” I ask, knowing that she did. After I made it back downstairs, she was dancing on the podium with his extremely good-looking guy, smiling and laughing at what he was saying.

  “Heck yeah, I did! Did you see that guy that I was dancing with for the rest of the evening? He was sex on a stick, pure perfection, and he was interested in me. He even asked me for my number.” Her head snaps up, her eyes wide. “Oh God, do you think he will call? I really hope he calls.”

  “Woah, slow down. I’m sure he will call, and if he doesn’t, he obviously isn’t worth your time.”

  I feel like such a hypocrite saying that. I can give advice, however I can’t take it.

  “You’re right. Jeez, I only met him last night and I’m already stressing over the guy. I’ll give him a few days. If I don’t hear from him, then I guess it just wasn’t meant to be.”

  I nod instead of replying. My mind is lost somewhere else. I know exactly how she feels. It’s only eleven and I keep checking my phone, making sure that I haven’t missed a text from Phoenix. I should know that I’ll get a text. We’re giving it a shot now, as where Zoe has only just met the guy who she’s waiting to hear from. Phoenix’s track record doesn’t help his case though. I still need him to prove to me that I can trust him. That trust isn’t going to be there after a little heart to heart. We still have a lot to talk about.

  “Hello, earth to Emilia?” Zoe interrupts my thoughts.

  “Oh, sorry. You were saying?” I ask, zoning back into the here and now.

  “I said, talking about pure perfection, my guy had nothing on your guy. Care to explain?” She’s looking wide awake now, no hangover in sight, just curiosity.

  I push away from the counter and sit down in the chair in front of her.

  “That was Phoenix,” I remind her.

  “Oh God, now I remember! He is even better looking than you made him out to be. If I weren’t so worried about where he was taking you, I probably would have paid more attention. Why didn’t you tell me that he worked there? Heck, why didn’t you tell me that you worked there? I know we haven’t known each other long, but isn’t that a vital bit of information, especially as I’m your boss?” Her eyebrows are raised in question.

  I’m about to be fired. I should have told her about Pulse.

  “I’m sorry. I should have told you about Pulse and that my father owned it. I know I should have, but nobody knew where I was, and my father was the main reason why I left without a word. I needed to escape his clutches. Phoenix was just the tip of the iceberg as to why I left.”

  “I’m not going to fire you, sweetie. I just wish that you had told me you owned the hottest club around. Do you mind telling me why you ran away without a word?”

  Do I tell her? I can trust her, right? She hasn’t given me any reason not to.

  “Please don’t tell the others about this. There are only two people who actually know this- Phoenix and Maxine. You will be the third, and that’s only because I trust you. You should think yourself lucky. I don’t let anybody in very easily.” I laugh nervously, trying to make light of the situation. Zoe doesn’t laugh; she just sips her coffee, becoming more awake with every sip. “My father is a very dangerous man, the kind of dangerous that you don’t want to mess with unless you want your life ended. When my mother disappeared, died I know now, when I was only a little girl, my dad took his anger and controlling nature out on me. Mostly, it was just telling me what I could do and making me feel like crap. Emotional abuse, should I say? Then, as I got older, he would occasionally hit me, not with his fists but usually with his belt on my back. Occasionally, he would slap me. They were the tamer consequences. My father lives by the motto that if you do something wrong, you have to suffer the consequences. I guess that’s what makes him a very powerful man.”

  “Oh my God. I’m so sorry, Em! No wonder you protested about going to the club last night. You’re worried that somebody will tell him that they saw you? Would Phoenix do that?” Zoe sprouts her questions off, her face looking mortified.

  I wave her worries down.

  “I’m not worried about Phoenix telling anybody. We sorted some personal stuff out last night. He also let me know that he’s been trying to find a way to get me away from my father for years. I know everything now – about why he stopped talking to me years ago, why he let me down.” I zone off, remembering that fateful night four years ago.

  “Are you okay?” Zoe asks, worried.

  “Yeah, I’m alright, just thinking.”

  “Will your father come after you then?”

  “I honestly don’t know. That place is full of workers who are completely loyal to my father, so, most probably, yes. I will just have to deal with that when the time comes.”

  “I think you should come and live with me, just in case somebody has followed you here. I don’t like the thought of you being alone all by yourself,” she suggests.

  I shake my head no adamantly. “Definitely not.”

  “But-”

  I cut her off. “But nothing. Did you not listen to anything that I just said? My father is dangerous, Zoe. I will not get you involved in my business. I knew sooner or later that he would catch up
with me. I mean, I didn’t stray too far away, so it was inevitable that he would find me sooner or later, but I will not get you involved, especially when you don’t know what you’re up against.”

  She places her mug down on the table, leaning forward. “Then tell me. I can’t help you if you don’t.”

  “You can’t help me. The only person who is likely to help me is Phoenix, and even he probably won’t be able to,” I tell her, releasing a loud sigh.

  “I have to try something. Anything,” Zoe replies, exasperated.

  “You can’t!” I stand up, my chair scraping against the hard wood floors. “My father is head of the mafia, Zoe. He has people in high places that would kill you for standing in their way without batting an eyelid. They show no remorse for anybody. I don’t want to risk anything happening to you. Do you understand now?”

  Zoe’s face has paled. She leans back in her chair, blowing out a long breath.

  “Well, holy crap on a cracker. I did not expect that to come out of your mouth. I was thinking maybe he was just a really strong guy, or someone who wouldn’t think twice about hitting me to get to you. Not once did I think that your father was the mafia!”

  All signs of her hangover have gone, it seems. Curiosity and quite a bit of nervousness is in its place, all conversation about guys gone. We’re stepping into dangerous territory right now, and I don’t like it one bit. I’ve already put her life in danger by telling her this.

  “You cannot tell anybody this, Zoe. I mean it. I’ve already put your life in danger by telling you. If somebody were to be listening… Well, let’s just say that it wouldn’t be good for either of us. It would be worse for you, though, because I’m his daughter. I wouldn’t be able to forgive myself if anything happened to you. You need to forget that I ever said any of this to you. Can you do that?”

  Zoe nods, not saying a word.

  “Thank you.” I exhale, a little relief coursing through my body.

  “So, what’s with you and Phoenix? You didn’t seem too happy to see him, and he looked murderously angry with you! But, oh my, the way he caught you in his arms was beyond adorable,” she gushes.

  I’m thankful for the subject change; however, this is going to be an embarrassing conversation as well as hurtful, bringing up old memories of the past.

  “Phoenix was my best friend when we were younger, but I loved him.”

  “And he didn’t feel the same way? Because last night told me a completely different story…”

  “Apparently he did, well, he does. I just don’t know if I can ever forgive him,” I tell her.

  “What did he do?” Zoe asks, her eyebrows raised.

  Seeing as we’re all for the truth today, I may as well tell her this. Maxine is the only person who knows this apart from Phoenix.

  “I saw him kill a guy.” My voice is emotionless. It gets that way when you tell yourself this repeatedly. It’s old news to me now; I just wish I could forget it.

  “How can you say that so calmly?” Zoe asks, completely shocked.

  “Because I’ve been telling myself this over and over for four years. I can’t turn back time and change it. If I could, then I would, but I can’t. It’s one of the reasons why we stopped speaking for years. Only recently have we started talking again.”

  “I don’t blame you. Why the hell did he kill somebody?”

  “Because of my father.”

  “Oh…” she replies, letting her sentence trail off.

  Well, I was happy this morning before conversation took a nose dive.

  My phone vibrating on the table halts the conversation. Picking it up, I check the caller ID.

  Phoenix.

  My heart rate picks up speed, a smile taking over my face. He actually remembered to text me! This is a big improvement. Maybe he was serious about us last night.

  You free this afternoon?

  Straight to the point. No ‘hellos’ or ‘how are you today?’.

  Possibly. Why, what did you have planned? I reply, giving nothing away. If it’s not worth my time, I will say that I’m busy.

  My cell phone vibrates in my hands, signaling an incoming text message.

  Meet me at the coffee shop called ‘Coffee Beans’ in Beverly hills in two hours.

  It’s not a question. He’s telling me to be there. I already know I will be; I’m intrigued as to what he wants.

  See you then.

  It’s not until I’ve sent that message that I realize it’s the coffee shop I frequent most days just down the road. Does he know I live here, or is it purely coincidence? I hope that it’s purely coincidence and that he hasn’t known where I live all along. If he knows, the possibility of other people knowing is high.

  “Is that him?” Zoe asks with a smirk.

  “Why are you smirking?”

  “Because, my dear Emilia, when your cell vibrated and you saw who had texted you, your face transformed from solemn to a love struck puppy. It didn’t take much to guess who could put that smile on your face. So, what did he want?”

  “He wants to go for a coffee at Coffee Beans in two hours.” I shrug.

  Zoe’s eyebrows rise up in question. She’s thinking the same thing as me. I thought he didn’t know where you lived?

  “I didn’t think so either. It may be just purely coincidence though. We’ll find out soon,” I answer her silent question.

  “Well, you best get ready then. You don’t want to go there looking like a pile of shit.”

  I laugh. “Thanks, Zoe. You don’t sugarcoat anything, do you?”

  “Nope, and that is why people love me. I don’t give any bullshit,” she says with a wide grin.

  We both stand up from the table at the same time, the chairs scraping on the wooden floor.

  “I guess I best get ready to do the walk of shame.” Zoe struts out of my kitchen, into my bedroom, making me laugh. I shake my head and follow her. She’s right; I need a shower because I stink.

  ****

  The bell to Coffee Beans rings as I walk through the door, signaling my arrival. I spot Harry immediately behind the counter, beaming at me with his beautiful smile. A quick sweep around tells me that Phoenix isn’t here yet. Typical.

  I walk over toward the counter, a friendly smile on my face.

  “Emilia, you look as beautiful as always.” Such a charmer.

  I stopped blushing after the first few hundred times that he told me this. “Ah, Harry, thank you for the compliment, but you tell me this every time that I see you.” I laugh.

  “And I will continue to tell you. Such beauty deserves to be announced.”

  “You are such a charmer.” Harry just winks at me, leaning his elbow on the counter and looking up at me. I’ll say it again; if I wasn’t so hooked on Phoenix, I would definitely snap this guy up. Maybe I should introduce him to Poppy. They would be cute together.

  “So, what will it be, sugar?” I roll my eyes.

  “The usual please.” Harry doesn’t ask. He just goes to work on making my caffeinated drink, like he’s done nearly every day for the past three months. Not once have I changed my order. Maybe I should one day to knock him off course?

  He places my takeaway cup down in front of me, and I root around in my purse for my change.

  “This one is on me.”

  I stop what I’m doing and look up. “Harry, seriously, no. You pay for every single one of my drinks, whether I come in once or twice a day. I can’t allow you to keep paying for me.”

  “Emilia, please don’t insult me. It’s a drink. It’s not like I’m buying you a diamond necklace.”

  “I’ll get this, and I’ll have a straight coffee, extra shot.”

  Harry’s gaze moves upwards, staring right behind me. His stance goes from relaxed to rigid in seconds. He’s now standing up instead of leaning toward me, and I know exactly why. He’s intimidated, and he has a reason to be.

  My body sags in relief. A tiny part of me was worried that he wouldn’t turn up.

  “Y
ou alright?” Phoenix whispers in my ear, his warm breath teasing my skin.

  “Yeah, I am now,” I reply quietly, still facing Harry.

  Harry raises his eyebrows in question. I subtly shake my head, letting him know that I’m okay. He subtly nods his head back in reply, his body sagging before he turns around to get Phoenix’s order.

  “Do you know him?” Phoenix asks, nodding his head toward Harry, who keeps staring at us.

  I turn around to face Phoenix. I can’t watch Harry paying attention to us. It’s unsettling. Wow. He looks amazing. These days I’m used to seeing him wearing a suit. Today he’s casual, but boy does he looks sexy. He’s wearing black jeans that hug his strong legs and are tucked into his black boots, and a light blue tee, which brings out the iciness of his eyes. It also hugs his muscles in the right places, showing off his display of tattoos. Right now, he looks like the ultimate bad boy, and judging by the amount of women looking our way, I’m not the only one thinking that. Phoenix in a suit is torturous, but Phoenix in casual clothes is dangerous. I want to get lost in him right now. I don’t even care if we are in the middle of a coffee shop or if people are watching. Judging by the smirk on his face, he knows exactly the effect that he’s having on me. I growl at him. One, for making me feel this turned on, and two, for not being able to do a damn thing about it.

  “That will be $7.59, please.”

  I spin around, facing Harry and picking up my takeaway cup. Phoenix’s hand comes past my face, paying for our drinks.

  “Keep the change.” His tone is stand-offish. Turning my head to face him, I find him staring Harry down, his vision never wavering – not even blinking. Turning my head back to Harry, I find him doing exactly the same thing – also not blinking. Jesus, these guys are a bunch of horndogs! I don’t want to watch any more of this. My coffee is getting cold. Huffing, I turn around and push past Phoenix’s large frame and make my way toward the booth at the back, my usual booth.

  I lift my cup and take my first sip. My eyes close. Mmm, heaven. I need to invest in a decent coffee machine. Making plain coffee just isn’t cutting it anymore.