Worth the Fight

by Beth Maria

  “Stop thinking. I can hear your brain ticking from over here.”

  I groan. “Am I that obvious?”

  “Emilia, I think you’re forgetting that I’ve known you for a very long time. I know how you work,” he states.

  “Maybe a little bit too much,” I grumble, but Phoenix hears and he chuckles.

  I huff. “Why do you have to be so infuriating, Phoenix? Most of the time, I want to punch you in the face about as much as I want to kiss you.”

  Taking his eyes off of the road for a split second, he looks me dead in the eyes and tells me seriously, “The feeling is mutual,” before turning his concentration back to the road. I huff again. I’m starting to think it’s entertainment for him to see me frustrated because he laughs AGAIN! I’m not going to give him the satisfaction of seeing me pissed off anymore. I’m going to ignore it when he annoys me. Well, I will try to…

  We spend the rest of the journey in silence. I don’t even think to ask where we’re going, because quite frankly, I’m steaming right now and just need to cool down. I’ve been facing out of the passenger window, watching the world go by for the last I don’t even know how long we’ve been driving for, trying not to allow Phoenix the satisfaction of annoying me. It hasn’t worked. Not one bit. I honestly don’t know anybody who knows how to push all my buttons more than Phoenix does. One minute, we are absolutely fine together, having a laugh or just talking, and the next, he only has to say one wrong word and I’m fuming. Only he has that hold over me, and I both hate and love him for it.

  “We’re here,” Phoenix announces after turning the engine off.

  I hadn’t even realized that we had stopped moving. I take in the scene before me- a field full of cars, people walking in big groups, families and couples, groups of friends, even elderly people. Everybody is walking toward a big entrance. What’s behind it catches my eye though. Rides and stalls and lots of bright colorful lights... I know exactly where we are.

  I actually squeal. “We’re going to the fair?” I’m near enough bouncing in my seat.

  Phoenix’s eyes shine with adoration, his hand coming up to rest on my cheek. I sink into his touch, letting out a little sigh. “I know how you always said you wanted to go when we were younger. I don’t know if you’ve been?” I shake my head no. “Good, then your first time will be with me on our first date.”

  Date? I can’t protest though. I’ve wanted this for ages.

  “I’ve been totally blindsided and cheated into this date.” I fake annoyance and stare straight into his icy blues.

  “We can turn back around and I’ll drop you back off at Coffee Beans, if you would like?” he asks, his eyebrows arched in question.

  “Hell no!” I jump out of his beast of a car, being careful not to break my ankles, and stand watching everybody making their way into the fairground while Phoenix gets out of the car.

  I feel his presence before I see him. It’s like my body is in tune with him, becoming hypersensitive. “After you.” I start walking, Phoenix’s hand coming to rest at the bottom of my back, gently guiding me along. My step falters for a second. This is an intimate position. Ah heck, I’m not going to think about it. I’ve thought about too much today. Plus, he did say that we were on a date. A goofy smile takes over my face at the word ‘date’.

  I’m on a date with Phoenix James – me!

  The line to get into the fairground doesn’t take too long. I spend the majority of my time taking in the sights and letting it all sink into my memory. For as long as I can remember, I’ve always wanted to come to the fair. I’d always ask my father if he would take me, but he was always too busy. I’d ask my mother, but she had to ask my father. He’d end up saying no and that we could go next year. Then my mother disappeared, and I never got to do anything that wasn’t with Phoenix. My father didn’t have the time for me, except to give me punishments, my mother wasn’t around, and Phoenix and I were too young to go anywhere without an adult. Phoenix promised that we would go when we were older, just the two of us. That never happened. We fell out. I kind of went into a depressive state, not doing anything apart from running or seeing Maxine, so my dream of a trip to the fair got put on hold; until now that is, and I’m going to take full advantage and make sure that I go on everything. I’m not leaving until I’m completely broke.

  “Two of us,” Phoenix says to the man in the booth selling tickets. Our hands are stamped, and then we’re allowed through.

  I squeal for the second time as soon as we step through the barrier. The lights are even more impressive. Lights of every color are shining. I feel like Christmas has come early. Games are set up in the middle of the field, many different ones, and I know I’m already going to have a go on every single one of them. That’s when I spot the cotton candy machine. THEY ARE MAKING COTTON CANDY! I need some, right now. My mouth is already watering at the thought of that sugary goodness melting on my tongue.

  I grab Phoenix’s hand and make a mad dash for the cotton candy machine. I want to get there before the line gets any bigger.

  “Woaah, slow down. What’s the rush?” Phoenix asks, pulling me to a stop.

  “Don’t stop! We need to get there before it’s all gone!” I start pulling his hand, trying to get him to move. It’s no use. This guy is like a huge brick wall that I can’t knock down.

  “Sweetheart, they aren’t going to run out.” Phoenix chuckles.

  “How do you know?” I grumble. I’m acting like a damn ten year old, all because of cotton candy.

  “Emilia, they have bags of sugar over there. They buy enough and then some to feed everybody who comes here every night. You have nothing to worry about. Plus, if they do run out, which they won’t, then I’ll buy you your own cotton candy machine. How about that?”

  The smile that takes over my face could probably split it in half. “Seriously?”

  “Seriously, if that’s what you want,” he replies, a small smile pulling at the corner of his lips in amusement.

  “Heck yeah, it’s what I want. I’d live on cotton candy if that were the case, though I’d have to go running more often,” I muse.

  “You run enough as it is. Do you still run for around two hours a day?” The small smile is gone, now replaced with something else, though I can’t tell what.

  “Erm, yes?”

  “Please tell me that you don’t push yourself like I saw you do that time?” Concern is etched on his face now. Gone is the playful Phoenix, the one I know oh so well in his place.

  “Can we just have one day where we don’t talk about anything that could end up in an argument? I just want to enjoy my time here, with you. Is that too much to ask for?” I plead.

  I watch the indecision flitter across his face. My eyes take on a puppy dog look about them, pleading with him to just drop it. That’s when I see it.

  “Fine, I will drop it for tonight. Tomorrow, though, I want you to tell me the truth.”

  I sigh. “Thank you. Let’s go get us some cotton candy.” I start pulling his hand again. This time he allows me to guide him to the back of the line, which is growing rapidly. Luckily, we don’t have to wait too long to get our sticks of deliciousness. After having a debate with Phoenix about who is going to pay, he wins. He pays the guy while I just stand there happily eating my pink ball of fluffy sugar. I’m in heaven right now.

  “Are you enjoying that?” Phoenix asks, amused.

  “Oh yeah,” I moan. “I can’t believe that I’ve never had this before. Surely they do this in the shops or something, right?”

  He chuckles, the sound shooting straight through my body. It’s a sound that I could listen to all day because it’s pretty foreign when it comes to Phoenix.

  “I don’t think so. That’s why they sell the machines to make it.”

  I sigh. I seem to be doing a lot of that lately. “Oh well. Looks like you’re just going to have to buy me that machine.”

  “Is that right?” he asks playfully, stealing a big chunk of my cotton ca
ndy.

  “Hey!” I swat at his arm. “That’s mine. Get your own.”

  “Who paid for it?”

  “If I knew that you would steal it, I would have paid for it myself.” I huff.

  “Stop getting your panties in a knot. I only wanted a little bit. Fill your boots with the rest of it.”

  “I plan to.” I walk off, not having a clue where I’m going. I want to take it all in before I decide what to do first. It’s absolutely beautiful, and everybody seems so happy and carefree here. People of all ages are having fun, laughing, and messing around. I don’t think it could be possible to be miserable in this kind of environment. I wish I had come here when I was a child, when I thought that everything was so innocent and not the cruel world that it is. I wish I could have come here with my parents and made memories before I realized what my life would turn into. I just wish that I could have had those few hours of solitude to pretend that we were like all the other families, loving and happy.

  “Hey, you okay?” Phoenix asks, crouching down and getting into my view.

  “Huh?”

  “You’ve been standing here staring into thin air for the past minute. I’ve been trying to talk to you, but you’ve been in your own world. What were you thinking about?”

  I shake my thoughts away. “Oh nothing.” Finishing the last bit of my candy, I chuck the stick in a trash can next to me. “Fancy going on a few rides?” I say, giving Phoenix a fake smile.

  “Sure. Let’s do the bumper cars?” If he knows it’s a fake smile, he doesn’t say anything.

  I nod my head. He grabs my hand in a hard grip, leading me in the direction of the bumper cars. My thoughts return, but I shove them away. I’m not going to think about the past. I’m here right now with Phoenix, and my father isn’t going to ruin this for me. I won’t allow him to ruin anything else where I’m concerned, especially not a dream of mine.

  Chapter Seventeen

  “I feel so sick!” I clutch my tummy as if that will take the feeling away.

  “You’re inexperienced. What would you be like if we went to a theme park?” Phoenix laughs.

  I shake my head. “Oh no, I would die. I don’t think my stomach could handle crazy rides like those. From now on, I’m just going to stick to the Ferris wheel and rides that don’t spin at crazy speeds.” I feel sick just thinking about it. “How on earth do kids handle that without being sick? I feel like I might puke right now.”

  “That, my sweet Emilia, is a sign that you are getting old.”

  I gasp. “Old? I am not old!” I’m insulted. I’m only twenty-two, Goddamit. I have many years left before I’m classed as old! While I stand there looking mortified and insulted, Phoenix stands there belly laughing at me. Oh, he thinks this is hilarious, does he? I’m sure he wouldn’t be laughing if I decided to throw up in his face right now.

  I need a drink.

  I walk away to a booth that sells refreshments and buy myself a bottle of water. I don’t check to see if Phoenix followed, or ask if he wants something to drink. I don’t care. He can buy his own drink for laughing at me. Damn fool!

  I move to the side and uncap the lid. I lift the bottle to my lips and down half of it in one sitting. Cold water is so refreshing.

  “Was somebody thirsty?” Phoenix asks quietly from behind me. It makes the hairs on the back of my neck stand up on end, a shiver wracking my body from his close proximity. He’s using his damn power on me again. I can’t even remember why I’m supposed to be angry at him. “Aren’t you going to offer me any?” his deep voice rumbles, his lips gently skimming the skin on my neck. I can’t help it. I moan. I don’t pass him the bottle though. As soon as I do, he won’t give me attention like this anymore. “Emilia, aren’t you going to offer me anything to drink? I’m rather thirsty too, I’ll have you know.” Oh God. His lips are going to be the death of me if they carry on caressing my skin as gently as they are. Maybe I should just give him the bottle to stop me making a fool of myself? No, why would I do that? Why would I stop him doing something that I so obviously love, something that I crave?

  What’s with all the silent questions?

  Eurgh. This guy is like my drug. I need to be high on him, like all the time!

  “Dying of thirst here, babe.”

  I spin around. I can’t take this slow torture anymore. He knows exactly what he’s doing to me. “Have the rest of it, you pest.” I shove the bottle into his chest.

  “You’re so violent.” His face conveys his amusement.

  “If you didn’t irritate me so, I wouldn’t have to use force,” I explain.

  “Come on, Rocky. Lets go win you some toys.” He screws the lid back onto the bottle, throwing the now empty bottle into the trashcan. I don’t even know when he drank the water, but apparently he did.

  We walk in the direction of the games, walking around until we find the one with the best prizes. None of them are great though. I guess they don’t spend too much money on the prizes. Otherwise, they wouldn’t make a profit. I’ve always thought these games were pretty fixed, though, and for the price that you pay? It’s a total con. I’m not going to complain if Phoenix is going to spend his money doing it. I guess I need the full experience, considering this is my first time at a fair.

  “How about this one?” Phoenix asks, stopping at one of the last game booths.

  Cheap copies of Hallmark bears sit in the middle, all sizes of them ready to be won and go home with a happy little girl or boy. Or in my case, a happy twenty-two year old woman.

  “I think this one has the best prizes. That bear at the back is pretty adorable.” I point toward the bear that has caught my attention, falling more in love with it by the second.

  “Then we shall get you the bear.” Phoenix hands the guy behind the counter the money in exchange for five hoops. I’m not going to get my hopes up. He won’t win me that bear. I’m almost certain that these games are rigged so that nobody wins.

  The guy explains the rules. We have to get three out of five hoops onto the bottle. Phoenix is acting as if this is the easiest thing he’s ever going to have to do in his life. I’m pretty sure that this is harder than it looks.

  Phoenix throws the first hoop. He misses. I can’t help the snicker that leaves my mouth. Phoenix ignores it, poising, ready for his next throw.

  He misses again.

  “It’s okay-”

  “Shh,” he cuts me off.

  I stand in silence, watching and waiting for him to fail. His next throw determines this.

  He closes one eye, lining his arm up with one of the many bottles a short distance in front of him. I can’t help but laugh. He’s taking this game so seriously. A scathing glare shuts my laughter up immediately, my eyes focusing back on the bottles.

  From the corner of my eye I see Phoenix throw the hoop, and as if in slow motion, it flies through the air and lands straight onto the middle bottle. I daren’t say a word. He throws the fourth hoop, and again, I watch it fly as if in slow motion, my nerves getting the better of me. Again, it lands on the exact same bottle. I can’t help the little cheer that leaves my lips, along with the little hop and skip.

  One more to go.

  Not speaking for fear of breaking his concentration, I stand completely still, not even breathing.

  It feels like a few minutes have passed when I see the last hoop finally fly in my vision. This time it happens so quickly. The hoop lands on exactly the same bottle as the other two hoops.

  “Argh!” I scream. I turn and jump onto Phoenix, hugging him for dear life. “You did it!”

  “Of course I did. Don’t you know I’m good at everything?” He hugs me back.

  “You are such a cocky bastard, Phoenix James,” I scold. I can’t help the smirk on my face though. He’s right. He’s good at pretty much everything. He’s one of those kids you secretly hated at school because they could do everything and you couldn’t even do one thing. Yeah, that’s Phoenix James…

  “Not cocky, just confident i
n myself.”

  “Eurgh, let me down, big head.” He does as I ask, planting my feet on the floor next to him.

  “Congratulations. Which bear would you like?” the man asks with a fake ass smile on his face.

  Yeah, buddy, we just won. Didn’t think that we would?

  Internally, I’m laughing my ass off. I don’t know why I ever doubted Phoenix’s ability. I should have known when we were choosing a booth that he would win whatever one we chose.

  “I’ll have that one at the back in the yellow sweater.” I point it out.

  He huffs but reaches up to get my prize. My hand covers my mouth, hiding my snicker at this guy’s annoyance. He passes it over to me not too gently, practically shoving it into my arms, and Phoenix witnesses it.

  “Whoa, come here,” Phoenix pipes up as the guy walks away to tend to another customer who has walked up. The guy stops in his tracks and turns around to face us with an exasperated look on his face. Oh no, he just pissed off the wrong guy. “I said, come here,” Phoenix repeats, calm and collected.

  The guy swallows, his whole face changing. There’s nothing worse than a calm and collected Phoenix. Nobody knows what to expect with this side of him – not even me.

  “Yes, how can I help you?” Even if he didn’t mean to, he sounded completely rude and condescending right now. I hug the teddy to my chest, hiding it from the display that is about to take place.

  Phoenix gets up close to his face, however is still calm.

  “Tell me, why did you just throw that teddy into my girlfriend’s arms?”

  The guy looks from me then back to Phoenix. Think I’m going to help you out here, buddy? Think again.

  “I, I didn’t.”

  “Don’t bullshit me…?”

  “Mark.”

  “Don’t bullshit me, Mark. I saw it with my own two eyes. I’m going to take a wild guess here and say that we’re the first people to win a prize today?” The widening of Mark’s eyes gives him away. “That’s what I thought. Like I said to my girlfriend, I was bound to win because I don’t like losing. I don’t appreciate the way you just treated my girlfriend. Now, I’m going to let you off because I guess I can be a nice guy when I want to be, but you should know this, Mark- I’m not a very nice guy, and you just pissed off the wrong person. Like I said, though, I’ll let you off this once because I’m on a date and I don’t want to ruin it by giving you a beating. Apologize and all will be forgotten.”