by Kaia Bennett
She did have a point about Mere running through men. In fact, it seemed like the only reason she was here tonight was because Jonny didn't mind having her around for now, though they didn't seem thick as thieves anymore. Usually she was more talkative and funny in a dry way. Tonight she stayed on the quiet side, as if she were in observation mode. She seemed different somehow, like the odd man out.
Every once in a while Nic saw those pale blue eyes turn and hold hers, and she would realize she was staring at Mere. In a way, she almost felt sorry for Meredith. The way the guys talked about her was either in terms of her talent as a musician or because she was apparently ridiculously good in bed. When Trish talked about her it was like she was some sort of home-wrecking fembot. Nicole didn't like the fact Gabriel had slept with her, but that didn't mean she shouldn't be treated nicely. So when Meredith went outside by herself to smoke on the upper deck, Nic told Gabe she'd be right back and followed.
Meredith was leaning her back up against one of the railings, watching the city traffic fly by below them. She turned to Nicole and blew out a white plume of smoke. "Coming to check on me?" she asked with a little smile.
"Yeah," Nicole said. She leaned against the porch as well. "You just seemed kind of quiet tonight, so I wondered if you were alright."
"Just have a lot on my mind. Wasn't in a very talkative mood, I guess."
Nicole paused for a moment, wondering if she should pry. She'd seen Mere plenty of times by now, but all of their conversations had been brief, friendly affairs that skimmed the surface. But it had been months since she'd known her, and she figured if there was ever an appropriate time to dig below the surface, it was now.
"Is it about Jonny? Things not going well with him?"
Meredith smiled softly almost sadly, and turned. "Things aren't bad, just not as fun. But that's the way it goes. People get bored with one another after a while, no matter what you do."
Her expression shocked Nicole. She hadn't thought Mere was that into Jonny, but maybe she'd been wrong. She certainly sounded like someone who felt cast aside. She started to ask Mere if she wanted to talk about it, but the opportunity passed her by.
"Your friend, Trish, doesn't like me. Does she?" Mere said suddenly. Nicole turned to see her nonchalantly assessing Trish through the glass as she retreated towards the bathrooms.
"What?! What gave you that idea?" Nic realized her eyes were much too wide and innocent, her voice too high for it not to be obvious she knew what Mere was talking about.
"Just a vibe she gives off when I talk to her. Like she thinks I'm waiting till you two turn around so I can sink my teeth into the guys or something."
Nic swallowed and suppressed a shiver. Did anything get past this chick? Did she ever not pay attention to what was going on around her? It was almost creepy. "Um, no... I wouldn't say that. Trish is just a little rough around the edges, that's all."
Meredith took a drag, then said, "You're sweet, but I can always tell. I tend to rub chicks the wrong way, unless they want to hook up with me." She blew out the smoke through her nose and flicked the ashes over the railing. "Amber's like my only friend that's a girl."
Nicole blinked. She guessed a hot girl in a band would have her fair share of people wanting to have sex. She was tempted to ask Meredith if girls hit on her often – just out of curiosity – but she really didn't want to go there. There was such a thing as too much information, especially when it came to her boyfriend's ex.
"I get it. You're a guy's girl," Nicole said with a shrug. "I had more guy friends than girl friends growing up. I mean besides Trish and my sister, most of the girls I know are really just acquaintances." Even Gabriel and Travis had started out as friends before they became more.
Meredith laughed. "Yeah, it's a guy's world out here. You spend so much time around a bunch of dudes, it gets easy to forget most girls don't. Guys tend to get me, but with girls I know I'm an acquired taste." Those ice-blues surveyed Nicole for a moment. "You don't mind me, though."
"No, why would I? You haven't done anything to me."
Meredith gave her a slow smile and took another drag. She blew smoke out of the side of her perfect lips. The look was something Nicole was still trying to get used to. Meredith looked at everyone like this. It was as if she could see through people when they talked, her brain tallying and keeping score of everything a person revealed verbally and nonverbally. It unnerved Nicole, but she fought past it. Maybe that's what Trish didn't like about her. That and the fact that Mere had already fucked two members of one band and Trish was still technically floating around in limbo with Chase. Nic turned her gaze away, trying to think of something to say to break the silence. Her eyes settled on the rosary tattoo looped around Meredith's right wrist.
"You have any tattoos?" Mere asked, catching where her gaze had gone.
Nic shook her head. "Thought about it. Every time I chicken out, I just get another piercing. But I'm gonna run out of ear space if I keep it up," she said with a laugh. She nodded towards the rosary. "Do you have others besides that and the angel wings on your back?"
Meredith turned and lifted the black and blond streaked hair into a makeshift ponytail, revealing a black gothic cross stabbing down the back of her neck.
"That's gorgeous." The pattern was so intricate that without thinking Nic reached out to touch it.
Mere shot her a glance over her shoulder. "Thank you."
"You got a thing for Christian imagery?"
"Not me. My mother," Mere said letting her hair fall as she turned around.
Nicole smiled. "Are you close to her?"
"I was," she said after a short pause. "She died in a car crash when I was fifteen. I got these to remind me of her." She took a drag off her cigarette. "Today's the anniversary of her death. Guess that's why I was a little out of it."
Nicole's mouth parted in surprise. Meredith seemed as cool and calm as she ever did while revealing that tragic fact. "I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to bring it up."
Meredith lifted a creamy, pale shoulder in a weak shrug. "Everybody dies eventually. No point wallowing in it when you could be out doing as much shit as you can before it's your turn." She said it almost nonchalantly, but for the first time she turned those glacial eyes away.
Nic didn't know what to say, even though she tried desperately to come up with something. She was so caught up in trying to break the silence, she almost missed it when Mere changed the subject.
"Your tattoo. What would you get?" Mere asked.
It was Nicole's turn to shrug. "I could never narrow it down. My mind changes every day, you know?"
That signature smile came out, a wicked glint in her eye. "Maybe you could get Gabe's name tattooed across your navel or something?"
Nicole smiled and nodded. "Got me pegged as the insanely devoted girlfriend, huh?"
"No, it's not like that. You're actually pretty chill," she replied with a short chuckle. "Though you do have to be a little insane to date a musician. We're nomads. Makes it hard to be there for someone, even if we really want to be." Meredith gave her little smile of concession. "But hey, there's an exception to every rule."
"Yeah," Nic said, the wheels in her mind once again turning towards Gabe’s departure. "Not every guy in a band is all about anonymous pussy, right?"
Nicole felt a certain amount of pride when Mere's eyes widened at her choice of words. It was the silent revelation that Nicole wasn't dim. She knew the risks involved, the temptations a guy faced on the road. But she also knew buying into the hype was the surest way to drive herself and Gabriel crazy with jealousy. She trusted him, believed in him, and before he left she was going to find a way to tell him she loved him.
Mere slowly put her cigarette out on the railing and tossed it. "I think you're right about that. Especially with Gabe; he's done the whole, wild sowing-of-the-oats thing. It's always easy to fall for a guy like him. But it looks like maybe he's finally found the perfect girl. Maybe you'll be able to keep him from getting rest
less."
It was hard to like her tone, the glint in her eye, or the way she seemed to stare right through her. It felt like a challenge, even though someone else uttering the words would have sounded like they were giving her a compliment. Nicole wanted more than anything to be that girl for Gabriel. But did Meredith really think she was? Or was Trish right? Was there something under the surface that couldn't be trusted with this girl? Mere seemed to know everything that was going on around her and yet she remained such a mystery.
"Maybe," Nic said, the hard edge in her voice not lost on either of them.
Meredith walked towards Nic, stopping mere inches from her. "And if he does get stupid, or restless, you can always pay me a visit. I have a soft spot for corrupting pretty girls," she said softly, giving Nicole's curves a sensuous once over.
Nic's mouth dropped open and stared wide-eyed at the girl who had just propositioned her. She practically heard a record skip in her head, the moment was so jarring.
Then Meredith burst out into a fit of laughter until finally Nicole nervously joined in.
"You should've seen your fuckin' face, Nic! Oh... that was priceless!"
"Very funny," Nicole managed to get out.
Nicole could have sworn she was serious, but Mere's laugh was so clear and genuine she couldn't help but join in, thankful as she followed the blonde back inside that she was only joking.
Chapter 18
Nicole rested on her stomach while Gabe lay on his side, his head propped up by his hand. He tried to listen to her, but he found himself caught up in watching her face. It still hit him hard how beautiful she was, especially when she smiled at him like she was now. Those brown eyes glittered, her cute nose crinkled at a joke she'd just made. Time stood still when she giggled and her full lips spread to make way for her wide grin. He felt at peace, this moment something he could safely store within him like his music. A perfect memory he could bring up when he was away from her.
"You're not listening to me, are you?" she said with a snort.
He gave her an embarrassed grin, and decided to tell the truth. "Nah, sorry. I was too busy looking at how perfect you are." His hand came up to stroke her face, and her answering smile was ridiculously captivating.
"Nice save, Casanova." She kissed the pad of his thumb.
"You know me; I like to keep the ladies happy, boost the ego a bit."
"Ha! You sure it's not you who likes the ego boost?" She nibbled lightly on the roving fingertips and said, "Might explain why you were so pleased with yourself when those girls came up asking you to sign their tits."
He barked out a laugh, and turned his face into the pillow for a moment before groaning out, "Napkins! They asked me to sign their napkins, and it was only, like, four of them. It wasn't that big of a deal."
"Oh, what-the-fuck-ever! You were eating that shit up," she laughed, scooting closer to him. "Admit it, attention whore. You love it when strangers tell you they love your music and think you're hot. And you love that they want you to scribble on a scrap of paper, just to say they were near you."
He shrugged and gave her a sheepish grin. "Well... I don't hate it."
"You know there's going to be more where that came from, and it'll be here before you know it," she said, alluding to the upcoming tour and the future of the band. "You getting excited about going yet?"
He smiled. It felt like it had taken a lifetime to get here, and then just like that all the waiting became a memory. "Yeah, I am. More than I thought. It's not like I haven't toured before, but never with an audience this big."
"I know it's going to get better and bigger from here," she said. She seemed to have complete confidence. "You'll be headliners, surrounded by girls. And I'll be here, missing you."
He kissed her softly and ran his fingers through her silky hair, soothing away the sadness he knew was hidden underneath the humor. "What other girls?" he asked with a quiet smile, loving the way her eyes softened. "And I'll miss you too, but it's not like I'm going to Iraq. Just, like, the Midwest for a couple of months to play some songs. But I'll be back. I can't stay away from you for too long."
She giggled and sighed, snuggling into the fold of his arms. How was he going to be able to stand not having this for two months? This was different from their previous separations. She wasn't his girl then. Now that they were more than just friends who fucked, it was harder to imagine the time without her.
"Ugh, I'm going to be so starved for affection. Poor Trish will have to be my surrogate boyfriend while you're gone just so I can cope."
"She's missing some vital equipment if she's going to be your surrogate boyfriend, isn't she?"
Nicole laughed and looked up at him. "True, but they have hardware for that."
Gabe raised an eyebrow, a mischievous grin spreading his full lips. "You, Trish... and some hardware. Let me just think about that for a moment."
"That's not what I meant and you know it!" she exclaimed, smacking him on the side of the head. "Don't you have enough porn to keep you satisfied without imagining me and my friend gettin' it on?"
"If you were gettin' it on with your friend in front of me, I might not need the porn."
They shared a laugh, but the wheels in his head were turning. He almost felt guilty making that comment. On a few occasions the idea of Nic and another woman had crossed his mind. Not in the perverted way... well, at least not all the time. He wasn't interested in revisiting the past, or trying to get Nicole to fuck other women. But he'd seen her talking to Meredith at the bar earlier that night, and he still hadn't forgotten what Mere said at the wrap party about hitting on Nic.
He didn't want to just blurt out that he'd talked to Mere, or that she’d insinuated Nic might be open to experimenting with a girl. It would open a whole can of worms he wasn't ready to deal with or explain. But he still wanted to know just how much Mere was fucking with him, and whether Nic was picking up a certain vibe from her. Now was the perfect opportunity to do so under the guise of being just a typical horny guy, without ever having to bring up his past mistakes.
"Have you ever thought about what it would be like to hook up with another girl?"
Nic laughed and then gave him a coy expression. "You say that like I haven't already."
Gabriel's mouth fell open, then stretched into a shocked, disbelieving grin. "You mean, you have—?"
She smacked him on top of his head. "You'd fucking love that, wouldn't you? Jeez... I've never been with a girl, perv. Well, not really... I mean, I've kissed one or two. Drunk stuff at the club, you know what I mean? But all of it was very PG-13 and alcohol-induced."
"Ever have a girl hit on you before?" He held his breath; waiting.
She giggled a little, thinking about it. "No, not really." She paused for a second, as if she were about to mention an incident she’d forgotten, then shook her head. "Granted, I might not have been paying attention, seeing as I like guys and all. Especially one guy in particular." She rubbed her body against his, placing a sensual kiss on the indent in his chin. "Couldn't you tell?"
"I had an idea," he said, tilting his face down to capture her lips.
He breathed a sigh of relief. He'd managed to satisfy his curiosity without falling into the trap of asking Nicole about Meredith outright. That's probably what the little bitch wanted him to do, thinking he might be stupid enough to take the bait and then have Nic in a panic over his former wild, bisexual sex partner just before he headed out on the road. Now he knew Nicole wasn't on the same page with Meredith. That was good. And if Meredith had openly hit on Nic she'd have known right away; if there was one thing was about Mere, it was that she was forward and out in the open when it came to going after what she wanted.
So, he pushed thoughts of that blonde terror aside and allowed himself to finally move on mentally. Meredith was only as dangerous as he allowed her to be. He was starting fresh and looking towards the future.
He felt a little lighter now, and putting Meredith out of his mind made it easier to t
hink about the thing he'd been trying to tell Nicole for months. Even though he'd tried many times, the moment never seemed right, the words never seemed to come out. He didn't want to force it, but keeping it locked up inside of him was starting to drive him crazy. At least all the frustration gave him plenty of fodder for his music. Melodies would take over and lyrics that reminded him of her would go through his head so quickly he couldn't get them all down. But they were as much a secret as his love for Nicole. He hadn't even shared them with Jonny yet, let alone the rest of the guys.
Nicole's lips grew more insistent on his. Her soft, naked body writhed subtly against him, her tongue circling his more forcefully. He allowed her to push against his chest so he was lying on his back. Her hand traveled down his stomach, under the sheets draped over his hips, through the dark curls at the base of his shaft, and then started a lazy caress over the hardness coming to life against her fingers. He pulled his mouth away from hers, one hand curling in her hair, the other reaching for a full, swollen breast to mold.
"You want some more of this?" he asked, referring to the stiff cock he was pumping into her hand under the sheets. His gaze fell to watch her tongue glide leisurely over her full lips.
She nodded her head, slid out of his grasp slowly, and climbed on top of him.
Her voice was sweet as honey, and her smile sexy as sin as she ground her hips over him and said, "Yes, please..."
***
Things didn't get any easier over the following weeks. There were lulls where the band wasn't so busy, where Nicole could spend time with Gabe the way she wanted to. But things were picking up at work for both of them. Business was slow at her job, and Nicole found herself working extra hours and busting her ass to make her sales quota just to ensure sure she could pay the rent. She often came home exhausted, talked to Gabe on the phone for a bit, and then passed out wishing he were with her.
