by Tara Rose
But it was over. It had to be. She’d take the memory of their faces, the look of lust in their eyes, and the taste of their kisses with her, but she couldn’t stay. That choice was now clearer than her choice this morning to run had been. “I have to leave. There’s no other solution. If I stay, I place you all in danger.”
Chapter Twelve
Saffron had to fight for every breath. This day had certainly ended up differently than it had started out. She was probably just overtired. She was away from the only home she’d ever known for the first time in her life, and she’d just learned some very unpleasant truths that more than likely involved not only her uncle, but also the two men who had almost become her mates. She needed sleep and time to think. But how was she supposed to do that with Landon and Nevada here, watching her so carefully, and looking so damn perfect and desirable?
“You can’t go anywhere tonight,” said Landon. “Get some sleep. Nothing will happen overnight. In the morning, we can figure something out.”
That was a solid plan, and she realized he was right. Even if she did run tonight, she had no idea where to go. She couldn’t simply roam the countryside, looking for shelter. She turned her attention toward Nevada. “You know a lot of shifters around the country then, don’t you?”
He nodded. “Yes.”
“Do you think any of them would give me shelter?” She hated to ask, and she didn’t want to put him on the spot, but she couldn’t stay here.
“I’m sure we’ll figure something out, Saffron. But for tonight, I agree with Landon. You need to get some rest.”
“I should be tired but I’m not. There are so many unanswered questions running through my head right now.”
Nevada glanced around. “We should put away all this food because eating it won’t help you sleep. And then let’s think of something we can all do to help you relax.”
She caught the look of incredulity that Landon shot him, and she had to bite her lip to keep from saying anything or making a sound. An image of all three of them, naked and writhing on that big bed against the opposite wall rose in her mind. Had Landon imagined the same thing, and is that why he’d shot Nevada that look?
Saffron rose and began to gather the snacks that had been brought in earlier. She followed Nevada into the kitchen, and then once the food had been put away and the empty beer bottles placed in the trash can under the sink, he re-corked the wine bottle and the two went back into the main room. Landon was sitting at the table with the deck of cards that Nevada had brought over earlier in the day.
“Saffron, do you play poker?” he asked.
She shook her head as she took a seat at the table. Nevada sat across from her. “I never learned.”
Landon grinned and shuffled the cards. “Well, I’m very good at it. I’ll show you.”
“He’s not that good,” said Nevada, placing a hand next to his mouth as though he were trying to whisper it in secret. His grin sent a rush of desire straight to her clit, and she giggled.
“He’s just jealous because I usually beat him,” said Landon.
The men explained a basic five card stud game to Saffron, and it made sense. But they each had better poker faces than she did, and even when she did have a great hand, they knew it. She couldn’t hide her reactions. By the fourth hand, she kept giggling at everything they said and did because she was trying not to show her emotions, which only made it more difficult to do.
Everything that had happened to her today came crashing down at once, and she was simply too drained to cry anymore, so instead it manifested itself in silliness. Everything suddenly seemed hysterical to her. The men didn’t seem to mind. In fact, the more she laughed, the more they smiled and seemed to relax in her presence. Finally.
Why couldn’t she have met them before today? What if she’d known them as other leopards in her tribe? Would things have turned out differently, or would they have been part of the same dark forces that her uncle was mixed up in? Were all the men in her village involved with the League of Exitium? No. That couldn’t be true. It couldn’t possibly go that deep.
But she also knew that her uncle held great power at home, and everyone feared him. Even if they weren’t directly involved, what he did touched their lives. She could never go back there. She’d known that this morning when she’d left, but now it hit her again, and she began to allow fear to creep in.
“I think Saffron is done,” said Nevada. “We should let her get some sleep.” Her concerns must have shown on her face, and they’d interpreted it as tiredness.
She shook her head. “I’m not tired.” If she went to sleep, it would be morning before she knew it. And that meant she’d have to leave. Nevada held her gaze, and Saffron’s breath caught in her throat. Snippets of her dream returned, and this time it almost seemed possible. Hadn’t they already seen her in her leopard form?
Nevada would look as he had in her dream, or close to it. And surely he’d never leave Landon behind if he took her somewhere. Maybe Nevada and Landon could accompany her to a safer place? But then Nevada would be leaving his mother and his village, and he’d never do that. Her dream was only that—a dream. It was a fantasy that would never be reality, and she’d best forget it.
Nevada’s gaze roamed over her face and tank top. “All right. If we’re going to keep playing, let’s give the game some meaning. Let’s put up stakes for each hand.” Up until then, they’d been playing each hand for nothing but the win.
“I have a little money with me, but I have to save it to buy things as I need them.” She had no idea how she was going to live for very long as it was. She hadn’t thought that far in advance. She’d simply run.
“Then we’ll have to think of something else to play for.”
“Like what?”
“Whatever you say, Saffron.” That voice…how did he do it? It washed over her like warm water, cleansing every fear and worry. She couldn’t seem to look away from his eyes.
“I know what I wouldn’t mind winning,” said Landon. His voice, too, now sounded seductive. She hadn’t drunk enough wine to be drunk. She barely felt tired. That wasn’t what was going on here. What were they doing to her? Did they have the ability to hypnotize her?
“What wouldn’t you mind winning?” she asked, holding his gaze.
“I wouldn’t mind another kiss from you.”
“When did you kiss her?” asked Nevada.
“When you went outside earlier to check on the noise.” Landon narrowed his eyes, again giving him the appearance of a cat. “Why? When did you?”
“When you were gone buying food and getting your things from home.”
Saffron stared from one man to the other, waiting to see how they’d react to this sudden revelation. Neither man had sounded angry as they’d asked, and they didn’t look upset right now, merely curious. Landon began to chuckle first. Once he did, so did Nevada.
“Dude,” said Landon. “We have a problem here.”
Nevada shook his head. “It’s not a problem. Not unless Saffron thinks it is.”
She shook her head, at a complete loss for words. They weren’t getting all territorial with each other, and they weren’t looking at her as if she had played them. How had this happened?
“All right then,” said Nevada. “We’ll play for kisses. Whoever wins gets to kiss Saffron.”
Her pussy was soaking wet within seconds at his words. “Wait a minute. What happens if I win? I might, you know.”
“Not the way you play,” said Landon, winking at her. She bit back a moan at that gesture. This was torture, but she was going to run with it. What did she have to lose? They were only talking about kisses, and neither man seemed to mind that the other had already done so. As long as she kept her wits about her, it would be okay.
“If she wins,” said Nevada, still grinning in a way that now made her clit throb, “and it’s a big ‘if’, she gets to choose which one of us to kiss. How does that sound?”
“Fair enough,” said La
ndon, beginning to deal the next hand.
“Don’t I get to voice an opinion at all?”
“Sure,” said Nevada. “Of course you do.” He stared into her eyes with so much intensity that she thought her brain cells would melt. “What would you like if you win? Tell us, Saffron.”
She couldn’t think of any answer that didn’t include both of them, but she wasn’t sure how they’d react. She had a feeling they might not protest, and that confused her even more. What was going on here? What had changed, other than that they now believed her story and had seen her true form?
And they’ve seen you naked.
It couldn’t be that basic, could it? They were men, but they were also shifters who were fiercely loyal to their people, and to each other. They were saving themselves for their mate. At least, the people in her village did that. Or they talked about doing so, at any rate. Was that not true everywhere? Then again, only one of them was a shifter. But Landon had as much at stake in this as Nevada. She’d learned the horrible truth of that tonight. But did that necessarily mean he’d never had sex? And what about Nevada? Should she ask if he had? No. She couldn’t. She simply could not do it.
They were both watching her carefully. “Saffron? What’s your decision?” She stared at Nevada, swallowing hard against the sudden lump in her throat. The tone of his voice gave her the impression he was asking about more than what stakes she wanted to play for in a card game.
The air in the room was charged, as though a storm was brewing, but she knew it was a clear night. Each breath felt difficult, and her pulse raced. She had the sensation of being perched on the edge of a great precipice, and if she leaped she wouldn’t die. She wouldn’t even be injured. Instead, she’d discover something wonderful and beautiful. She’d learn a secret that would solve all her problems, now and in the future.
She took a deep breath, and then on the exhale, let the words come out. “I want more than kisses. From both of you.”
The only sound in the room was the soft crackling of the fire. She thought she heard coyotes outside again, but it might have been the wind. It hardly mattered. She’d just told two men she’d only met this morning her most fervent desires, and she had no clue why she even felt this way. She only knew it was right, and it was true.
Topaz had always told her to trust her instincts. She hadn’t trusted them all day, except when she’d kissed each man back. That had been real. Their mouths on hers had been erotic, perfect, and more arousing than anything her imagination could have conjured up. Their bodies pressed against hers had been warm, and their auras had been pure alpha male. She wanted to experience that again, and much more. And she wanted to share it with both men.
Nevada put down his cards and stood, his eyes shining with lust and determination. He held out his hand, and she took it, rising as if in a dream. This was real. It was really going to happen. She felt no fear, only a sense of peace and wonderment, as though she had just completed a significant rite of passage. He cupped her face, his gaze almost desperate now. “Saffron…are you sure about this?”
“I am,” she whispered. “But please don’t ask me to explain it or justify it because I can’t. I only know it feels right.” She glanced at Landon, who looked like he was ready to jump out of his skin. When she held out one hand, he nearly tripped walking around the table to stand next to her and take it. “There’s something you both need to know. I’ve never been with a man.”
“It’s all right,” said Landon. “We’ll be careful. We won’t hurt you.” He looked so afraid that it made her want to cry. She didn’t want him to be afraid. She didn’t want either of them to be afraid. She only wanted this to happen, because she knew it would be amazing, and she knew it was what this entire day had been leading up to.
“In that case, I have a confession as well,” said Nevada, releasing her face. “Let’s sit down by the fire so we can talk.”
Chapter Thirteen
Nevada wished the earth would open up and swallow him. Would Saffron change her mind once she heard this? And what would Landon think? He’d never told him, and he knew now that he should have done so.
He led her to the sofa and sat close to her while Landon tossed another log on the fire and stirred the embers until the fireplace once again blazed with heat and light. He took her hands, which were cool now. He couldn’t make love to her without telling her this, even if the outcome was that she changed her mind.
“Two years ago in Phoenix, my mother and I were staying with a family of jaguars. There was a woman there named Jasmine. We were in the village for six months, and Jasmine and I grew close. Very close. We made love.”
“Why didn’t you stay?”
“It wasn’t our home. We knew it would never be permanent. I was supposed to be saving myself for my mate. She begged me to stay, but when my mother found out, we left. And we’ll never return there.” He cut his gaze toward Landon, who now stood with his back to the fire, watching them both. “I’m sorry I never told you.”
He shrugged, and Nevada breathed a sigh of relief at the neutral look in his eyes. “Dude, no sweat. We all have secrets.”
Nevada turned his attention back to Saffron. A small frown creased her forehead, but it wasn’t anger that he watched pass through her eyes. It was confusion. “Nevada, I’m not going to judge you for that. Did you love her?”
“I was infatuated with her. We never stayed in one place for very long, but we were there long enough for me to allow myself to get to know her.”
“Why have you not mated with a cougar from your village?”
“None of them are my mates.”
She averted her gaze, and he knew what her next question would be before she asked it. “Then why are you willing to make love to me?” Her voice was so soft he had to strain to hear it. How could he explain this to her when he couldn’t even explain it to himself? And where did Landon fit in here? They should have talked about this beforehand. So much had happened today that Nevada felt as if he’d lived a lifetime since finding Saffron hiding in the trees this morning.
“I wish I had a clear answer to that, but I don’t. All I can tell you is that from the moment I first looked into your big green eyes, something touched my soul.”
Her lips parted, and the most profound sense of amazement came over her face. It was all he could not to just pull her into a rough embrace and take her. Nevada struggled to keep breathing. “I’ve never looked at a woman—shifter or human—and felt this before. I don’t know what’s going to happen tomorrow, Saffron. I don’t know where you will go, or if you will go, but I know that right here, tonight, I feel more connected to you than I have ever felt to another being in the thirty years I’ve been alive.”
He brushed the hair out of her eyes, and his dick began to throb at the way she moaned softly. Her eyes misted over as though she was going to cry again, and he didn’t miss the way her fingers had begun to tremble. “I don’t know if it’s right or wrong. I only know it’s what I want. It’s what I’ve wanted since I picked you up and carried you here. It’s all I’ve been able to think about all day.”
Landon took a seat on the other side of Saffron and stroked her hair. Her eyelids fluttered slightly, and Nevada was out of his mind with need. Did this girl have any idea how damn seductive she was? Probably not. How could she know? He doubted that there had been any semblance of courtship with either Rosen brother who had been chosen for her. She more than likely barely knew them.
“Saffron,” said Landon, “I feel the same way. I don’t understand it, but I don’t care about that. I promise you that we won’t hurt you, and we aren’t using you. This isn’t something I do either. I’m not a virgin, but I haven’t used a woman for sex. I’ve never felt this way before. Never. I don’t want to analyze it or question it, and I don’t want to think about tomorrow.”
Nevada released her hands so that she could face Landon. He cupped her face as he continued speaking. “I only want to make love to you tonight. And if tonigh
t is all you can give me, I will gladly take it, and I will cherish the memory of it for the rest of my life.”
* * * *
Saffron could barely breathe. She’d never heard such tender words in her entire life, and certainly not from a male. She couldn’t help but wonder once again whether her certainty that each of these men were her mates might not have credence after all. But how was that possible? Should she tell them, or should she simply give in to the overwhelming pull toward them that she’d felt all day? They’d felt the same thing. Both had just told her so. Surely that meant something. This couldn’t only be lust, could it?
“I want that, too, Landon.” She glanced over her shoulder to gaze into Nevada’s eyes. “I want that from both of you.”
Nevada’s entire face relaxed as though he were finally sure of her desires. “And it doesn’t bother you that I made love to someone who wasn’t my mate?”
She shook her head. “What does that actually change?”
The corners of his mouth turned up. “Nothing. Not really.”
“And besides, aren’t you about to do that now?”
The look he gave her was so intense that a sliver of fear tried to pierce the fog of lust surrounding her, but she knew that she had nothing to be afraid of. “Are you so sure about that, Saffron? That you’re not my mate?”
The question hung in the air between them like a tangible thing. Saffron swore she saw it floating like a mist in front of her eyes. Had he read her thoughts, or was it possible he’d had the same ones as she had? She turned to look into Landon’s eyes, now blazing with as much lust and certainty as Nevada’s. She had to ask. “Do you feel the same way?”
