by Julia Crane
“We’ll figure something out.” His words sounded hollow. They both knew nothing good would come out of the situation.
She was too vital to Harrington for him to let her go.
Chapter Eleven
The dorm room door closed softly behind her, locking automatically. It took so much self-control to stop the grin from spreading across her face.
She didn’t know it was possible to feel this alive. This happy. Lucas was responsible for the emotions; she knew that with absolute certainty. If she had known it would be like this she would have told him long ago how she felt about him.
But soon she would leave. The thought hit her hard. Panic rose within her, but it was quickly overridden by her sensors that sent signals to her microprocessor. The familiar hum washed over her body, steadying her. It was strange—when there was distance between them, her body could manage the reaction, but when he was near, she seemed to lose control.
Before she made it to her bed, there was a knock at her door. She froze. Had he come back for her? No, it was Quess.
Kaitlyn smoothed down her dress and turned to face the doorway. “Come in.”
When the door opened, Quess hurried inside, her face lit with excitement. “I came by earlier and you weren’t here. Where were you?”
“I took a walk with Lucas.”
“You what? Are you serious?” Quess sputtered, her jaw falling open. “How did that happen?”
Kaitlyn kept her face impassive, even though she wanted to tell Quess everything. The thought of smashing the camera crossed her mind, but she pushed it aside. Instead, Kaitlyn motioned to the camera with her eyes. “He needed to ask me some questions to make sure my programming was working correctly.”
Quess looked up at the flashing dot, and then back at Kaitlyn. “Well, now you need to go for a walk with me—now. My grandfather sent me.” She spoke a little too loudly, as if for the benefit of the cameras.
“Okay.” Kaitlyn walked towards the door, exchanging a look with her friend as she passed.
They made their way down the long corridor as classical music streamed from the speakers above them. There were two women standing in front of the exit.
“Hey.” Quess waved and smiled. One of the women gave a strained smile and the other avoided looking at them. As if the top of her shoes were more interesting. Seemed to be the normal reaction of most of the staff when they saw Kaitlyn.
They moved aside to allow them to pass. Quess pushed open the door and the stepped into shadows. Darkness was starting to fall. A misty yellow glare from the security lights illuminated the grounds as they flicked on in the twilight.
Quess walked as fast as her legs would take her towards their safe zone, the place where Kaitlyn had taken Lucas. Kaitlyn wondered what had her friend so excited. Usually it was a new dress she wanted to tell her about, or that her Nanny had made special cookies. Everything seemed to make the girl excited.
When they finally reached the birch tree, Quess squealed, “I was right – he was on Facebook. I found him.”
“You did?” Kaitlyn asked, surprised. “Are you sure it’s him?”
“Yes, I’m sure. His name is Evan. He’s twenty-one, has a labrador retriever named Spike, two younger sisters—you know the type—cheerleaders, and his parents divorced when he was twelve. He’s very hot, like on fire.”
Kaitlyn’s mind whirled as she grasped what Quess was saying. She wasn’t quite sure what to make of this news. On the one hand, she was curious, but on the other hand, there was Lucas. He was her reality now.
“That’s impressive, Quess. How do you know all of this?”
“I told you. Facebook. It’s like a peek into someone’s private world.”
“But… On fire? Twenty-one?” Kaitlyn asked, her mind sorting through the information.
Quess smiled sheepishly. “He’s not really on fire—as in flames. He’s sexy. That’s what I mean.”
“Oh.”
“That’s not all…”
“Well, then tell me the rest.”
“There are tons of pictures of you on there.”
Kaitlyn froze. “Me?”
“You looked so happy.” Quess said thoughtfully. “Although, I have to say your taste in clothing—not so great.”
Kaitlyn suddenly felt lightheaded. The woods began to spin in her vision. Was her processor shorting?
She heard a muffled, “Kaitlyn, are you alright?”
Next thing she knew, there was only darkness.
Someone was shaking her.
“Kaitlyn. Please wake up.” Quess’s voice was panicked.
Kaitlyn’s eyes fluttered open, and she squinted. Why was she on the ground? Her head felt heavier than usual as she glanced around, her eyes quickly adjusting.
“I’m okay.” Kaitlyn pushed herself to a sitting position, using a nearby tree to lean against. She was lucky she didn’t fall into it when she passed out.
“What happened?” Quess asked, her eyes concerned.
“I don’t know.”
“We should take you to see my grandfather.”
“No. I’m fine.” Then it came back to her what they were talking about when she passed out…or when her body shut down. She wasn’t sure if there was a difference. “Please, don’t tell him.”
Quess nodded. “Whatever you want.”
Kaitlyn accessed her memory files and sorted through her thoughts from their previous conversation. “I believe you mentioning details about my past caused me to shut down. That must be it.”
“Like a safety measure or something?” Quess sat on the grass and pulled her knees to her chest.
“I just need a moment.” Kaitlyn closed her eyes and waited until she felt normal again. Her rhythms settled into familiar patterns. The mechanisms in place had been successful. Whatever happened had passed. Was it possible the IFICS had somehow connected her real memories to some kind of fail-safe blocking system? “I’m fine now. Tell me what else you saw.” She paused. “But don’t use their names. Just in case that was the trigger for my shut down.”
Quess nodded in understanding. The girl had a quick mind. She paused as if trying to compose her words carefully before she spoke them.
“There was this girl who passed away, and everyone she went to school with was devastated, but mostly her boyfriend. He started a memorial page in her honor. He posted pictures of them together all over it, and her friends did, too. To this day, they even comment and tell her happy birthday. Like a shrine. Her boyfriend wasn’t able to move on without her. It was sweet, but also a bit strange.”
“Where was she from?”
“Near the ocean.”
Kaitlyn wanted to ask so many questions, but was afraid it would make her black out again.
“Kaitlyn!” a voice in the distance yelled.
Kaitlyn jumped to her feet and looked around. Her sensors analyzed the voice patterns. It was Lucas, and he was over two hundred meters away, but moving quickly. His voice sounded strained, out of breath.
A few moments later, he came into view. “There you are. Thank goodness. We got an alert that one of your sensor’s shorted out.”
“I’m okay. I felt funny and then sort of shut down.”
His eyes searched hers. “What were you doing at the time?”
“Just talking to Quess.”
Lucas narrowed his eyes and looked at Quess. “What were you talking about?”
“It’s not important,” Kaitlyn said a little too sharply.
“The hell it isn’t.”
“What, you don’t monitor what she says?” Quess jumped up and put her hands on her narrow hips. “You have cameras all over the place. I kinda figured you knew every word she said before she said it.”
“It’s not like that,” Lucas said flatly. Kaitlyn noted that there wasn’t much conviction in his tone. His blue eyes turned back to Kaitlyn. “Kate. Please tell me what you were talking about. We need to figure this out. There must be a glitch somewhere, and we need to have i
t straightened out before your unveiling.”
“Right. We can’t have your precious project breaking down, can we?” Kaitlyn said coldly. Of course, that was more important to him. Did the kiss they shared mean anything to him?
“Kate, there are ways we can find out, but I don’t think you want us to do that, do you? Professor Adams will also have been alerted to the shutdown. He’s probably already at the lab scrambling to figure out what went wrong.”
Her body stiffened. She knew he was right. They could give her truth serum drugs, maybe somehow go into her history file data. Or worse.
“Fine, we were just talking about my past. Happy?”
“Your past?” Lucas raised an eyebrow. “Exactly what about your past? What do you know about it?”
Kaitlyn hesitated. She didn’t want to give up information on the man from her dreams, especially after hearing what Quess had found out about him and the ‘shrine’. Even after all this time, he hadn’t let go.
And regardless of the kiss, Lucas’s main concern was clearly the project.
“I was telling Quess that I’ve been having dreams about the ocean.”
“The ocean? That’s it?”
“Yes. Dreams of me swimming in the ocean. Why would that cause me to short circuit?”
Lucas ran his hand down his jaw line and looked away, lost in thought. “Are you sure there isn’t more? I don’t see why that would have caused you to short out. Have any other memories surfaced?”
“I have no memories, Lucas. You and Professor Adams took care of that.”
He stared at her for a long time before finally conceding. “Maybe it was just a random glitch. We’ll do more testing in the morning.”
“Of course you will,” Quess spat. “That’s all you do to her. Why can’t you just leave her alone?”
A look of hurt crossed his beautiful face. “Let’s get you both back to the dormitory. Quess, I don’t know if it’s a good idea that you spend time with Kaitlyn anymore.”
Quess glared at him. “Well, good thing that’s not up to you.”
Kaitlyn gave her friend a comforting look, and then took Lucas by the arm, leading him away from her friend. She leaned forward, speaking quietly. “Lucas, please don’t take Quess away from me. She’s the only person that talks to me. I promise I won’t bring up anything about my past again. Just don’t take her away.”
His eyes softened. “I’ll see what I can do.”
“Thank you.” She wanted to throw her arms around him, but that would not be appropriate behavior. Her mind raced. So much had taken place in such a short amount of time. She wasn’t sure how she felt about the new information regarding her past, or what was going on between her and Lucas.
If anything.
Chapter Twelve
They screwed up. Somehow, they screwed up.
“How is this even possible?” Lucas muttered to himself as entered the dimly building.
Not only was Kaitlyn exhibiting emotions, she was experiencing memories. Neither should have slipped through the robot’s overrides. He couldn’t believe the way she had kissed him. He had never felt so wanted or needed in his life. If anyone felt emotions, it was Kate.
But what if her feelings got in the way of her job? She was designed for a very specific purpose, and that did not involve forming emotional connections. That switch should be firmly in the off position. She should be able to do anything asked of her without question or fear.
This is not good.
Lucas shoved open the door to his office, a closet-sized space tucked into a corner near the lab. The thought struck him that the purpose of her very existence was to be put in harm’s way. He hated it. And now, with human emotions leaking into her consciousness, it could prove even more of a danger for Kaitlyn. What if she hesitated on a job and it got her killed?
Lucas took long strides to his computer and the chair squeaked noisily as he sank into it. He pulled up Kaitlyn’s files on the computer. Harrington will flip when he finds out.
Lucas started carefully reading through each line of code—coding that he had written—looking for the answer.
After four hours, his eyes were blurring from looking at the numbers for so long. Maybe there wasn’t a way to turn off emotions, and they had just been fooling themselves all along. Wishful thinking. There had to be a scientific explanation.
And then he saw it. His heart fell. No. No. No. This can’t be.
He never made mistakes, but there it was. One number wrong, and the entire sequence was faulty. It was an easy fix. Damn it! What the hell was he going to do? A couple of strokes on the keyboard, and a new upgrade, and Kaitlyn would be fixed. Emotionless and good as new. She would never look at him with that longing, that same intensity again.
He slumped in his chair, and rubbed his face. As crazy as it sounded, he knew he had fallen in love with Kaitlyn. It had happened gradually—all the days they’d spent together, alone, testing her skills; all the times he’d admired her strength and endurance. He’d fought against it for so long, thinking he was an idiot for essentially falling in love with a robot. A non-human. But there was no denying his feelings now that she returned them. She wasn’t a robot, after all. She was real.
She was always on his mind, and to know it was mutual… How could he erase that? He stared at the code across the screen, the flashing cursor set at the glaring mistake. He had naively hoped the coding was correct, and her feelings for him had overridden the computer somehow, like one of those cheesy romantic movies. He had hoped that a small part of her had remained, and that part wanted him.
But her desire for him had been nothing more than a slip of a keystroke.
Lucas had a sudden urge to throw the computer across the room. Instead, he closed his eyes and breathed deeply.
He had to get a grip. The project came first. That was what he was paid for—to make sure she was the sleekest, fittest, strongest, most intelligent mechanical soldier on the planet. Her life depended on it.
He had to do it. He couldn’t risk her being dismantled because he selfishly wanted her for himself. As much as it pained him, he knew what he had to do. It was the only choice he had—the right choice.
But for who?
If only he could have one more night with her. If only he could put off fixing the coding until the day after tomorrow…
No, he had to do it now. If he spent another day with her, he knew he might not be strong enough to fix her at all
His fingers hesitated over the keyboard. He pictured her beautiful face, and the excitement in her unusual grey eyes. At least he would have the memory of their evening together. She would have nothing.
It’s for the best.
Before he could change his mind, he made the correction and watched as the coding scrolled down the computer screen, updating her system commands. He inserted the new chip and waited for the data to transfer. Tomorrow, he would implant the new chip, and she would be a true cyborg. The thought made Lucas sick to his stomach. He was a monster.
All in the name of science.
The next morning, Kaitlyn walked into the lab wearing nothing but a stark white hospital gown, her feet bare. Lucas noted that she avoided eye contact with everyone in the room as she walked over and sat on the cold steel table, and waited. Her hands rested lightly on the edge of the table, and her feet hung motionless. The nurse rushed over and withdrew her blood, and then quickly left the room.
His heart sank. Without a word he moved away from Professor Adams, and made his way to his desk to pick up the upgrade chip. Watching Kaitlyn from the corner of his eye.
He knew now that her fluid movements, her blank stare, it was all an act. He couldn’t imagine what she had been going through all this time, sitting motionless, expressionless, in front of them. In front of the cameras. Her level of self-control was impressive. At least he could take comfort in the fact that he would be removing the mental anguish she must have been dealing with every day.
Sure, Lucas. Keep te
lling yourself that. He clenched his fists at his side, tempted to put them both through the nearest window. A little pain and blood could clear his mind and take away his frustration over what was about to happen. The removal of the only spark of life she had left. He opened his right hand and stared down at the tiny, innocuous chip, and crossed the room towards her. He had to do it. In two days, they would hand her over to the Department of Defense. He inhaled deeply, steeling himself.
“Kaitlyn. We’re going to give you another upgrade that should avoid another shut down,” he said. “We’re also implanting the slang chip so conversations will be easier for you to follow, as well as a facial recognition program that will give you the ability to tell what people are thinking and feeling by their expressions. I’m sure you’ve picked up a lot on your own through watching others interact, but this will make it easier. You are programmed to be very adaptable. Eventually, you will be able to mimic them on your own during interaction.”
I’m also going to take away any feelings you had for me. He groaned inwardly.
She nodded her head slightly in acknowledgement. Her eyes met his there wasn’t a hint of distrust in her grey eyes. Which made it even worse.
It was killing him. He forced his breathing to slow and tried to quiet the emotions raging in his mind. She trusted him completely. If she knew what he was about to do, he knew she would beg him not to, and he would be helpless to tell her no.
His hand shook as he walked around behind her and gently untied the top of the hospital gown to expose the plastic and metal door in the center of her back. He opened the plastic on her back. The skin on either side was smooth, completely unmarred by anything but the transparent teal door. With a click, Lucas disconnected and removed the old processor chip and implanted the new one, wondering if she would feel the changes. Probably not.
He closed the plastic door again and it slotted into place. His hand lingered on her skin longer than necessary. Being so close to her was too much. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath. Her processor was updating as he watched. He had just ended any chance he had of a real relationship with her, the one woman he wanted. He had never connected to another woman the way he did Kaitlyn. Sure, he’d had a couple of girlfriends—sexual partners, really—but they had never meant anything of significance to him.
