“But jumping Sam won’t change anything,” Maya said and thankfully her voice was low, soft.
“Yeah, I know that.” Didn’t stop her from wanting to jump him, but she was stronger than her hormones. She hoped.
“Honey, once he signs those damn papers, you can pick up your life again.”
“I know that too, Maya,” she said tightly.
Her twin must have caught the fine edge of tension in Mia’s voice because she said, “Fine, fine. I’ll stop.”
“Hallelujah.”
“Funny. Let’s see if you’re still laughing after you spend the day with my kids.”
“Your kids are great,” Mia argued.
“Yeah, they are,” Maya said. “But don’t tell them I said that.” She scooted her chair back and held one hand out. “Now, help your prego twin out of this stupid chair, will you? I’ve got to figure out where I’m going to put that Christmas elf in our suite.”
Mia laughed and pulled her twin out of the chair. “You brought Buddy the Elf with you?”
“Of course I did.” Maya threw her hands up. “Both boys look for him the instant they wake up in the morning. And they know that Buddy reports to Santa so...” She shrugged. “It seemed like a good way to keep the boys in line while we’re on this cruise.”
“Uh-huh.”
Maya gave her a hard look. “Just wait until it’s your turn to hide that elf and you have to find a new spot every day!”
Mia could hardly wait.
* * *
For the next couple of hours, Sam buried himself in work. It was the best way. Always his answer to avoiding emotional issues, he’d been doing it since he was a kid.
Back then, his father had made it clear that a man’s duty was to take care of his business and his employees. Emotions were something to be avoided. He would point out that marrying Sam and Mike’s mother had been the biggest mistake of his life, since he’d had to settle an enormous sum on her when they divorced. He considered his sons to be his only compensation for his relationship with their mother.
His father had always demanded that Sam think. That he never allow his feelings, whatever they might be, to rule any decisions made. Well, Sam had broken that decree when he’d married Mia. He’d allowed emotion to swamp his judgment and now he was paying for it. He’d taken the risk—and lost.
“You’re not getting any work done,” he muttered and tossed his pen onto the desk in front of him.
Avoiding Mia wasn’t going to do him any good if he couldn’t get her out of his mind. He stared out at the ocean, letting his brain wander, hoping it would come up with a strategy for how to deal with this.
Deal.
At the thought of that word, Sam’s brain leaped back to the idea that had occurred to him earlier. He’d dismissed it at first of course, because he might be a bastard, but was he low enough to actually blackmail Mia?
Slowly, his gaze slid to the envelope Mia had left behind when she walked out of the suite.
Divorce papers.
He hadn’t signed them yet.
And he wasn’t sure why.
He wasn’t holding onto the past. He’d already come to grips with the end of their marriage. But she was here now, he reminded himself. She wanted those papers signed and he had to wonder what she’d be willing to do to see that happen.
A knock on the door had Sam’s head snapping up. Mia? Come back to...what? Was she looking to expand on that kiss that was still sending sparks sizzling through him? His body responded to that thought with a rush of heat that staggered him.
He walked to the door, yanked it open and the heat instantly drained away.
“Hi, Uncle Sam!” Charlie Rossi, Maya’s five-year-old son, raced past him into the suite and on his heels was his three-year-old brother, Chris. Chris didn’t say much, but he waved in passing.
“Hey you guys, don’t run!” Joe Rossi, their father and Sam’s brother-in-law shouted, then turned to Sam and held out one hand. “Good to see you.”
“Yeah,” he said, shaking the man’s hand. “You too. And surprising.”
He’d expected that Mia’s family was onboard just to throw stones at him and protect Mia from him. He hadn’t been prepared to see a friendly face in the bunch.
“I’ll bet.” Joe walked past him, looked for his sons and relaxed a little when he saw them jumping onto the couch. “Stop jumping, that’s not your trampoline.”
Chris stopped instantly. Charlie was a harder sell. “Uncle Sam, Dad says we can have a snowball war if we’re good and don’t bug you so do you have cookies?”
“What?” Sam looked at the boy, whose sun-streaked brown hair was dipping into green eyes much like his mother’s. “Uh, no. I don’t have cookies.”
“Juice box?” Chris asked.
“No, sorry.” He hadn’t expected to be entertaining kids. And his features must have said so, because Joe came to his rescue.
“Relax you guys, you just ate lunch.” Joe walked to the couch, picked up a TV remote and said, “Here. Watch that cartoon movie you like so much while I talk to Uncle Sam.”
“Okay,” Charlie agreed happily enough, dropping onto the couch hard enough to make his little brother bounce and fall over. “Then snowball war?”
“Yeah,” Joe said. “If you’re good.”
“Be good, Chris,” Charlie warned.
“Right,” Joe muttered, with a laugh, “because he’s the problem.” Glancing at Sam, he added, “Should feel bad about that,” he confessed. “Using the TV for a babysitter, I mean.”
Sam watched Joe with his sons and thought how differently the Rossi kids were being raised than Sam had been. Hell, if he’d jumped up and down on a sofa, his father would have hit the roof.
Shaking his head, he pushed all of that aside and asked, “Want some coffee?” Sam asked. “And I’ve got water and probably sodas in the wet bar if the kids—”
“I’ll take the caffeine,” Joe said quickly, “and pass on it for the kids, but thanks. They’re fine.”
“Okay.” Sam led the way to the coffee station along one wall and poured each of them a cup. “So, I saw Maya...”
Joe winced. “She’s not real happy with you.”
“Yeah, that was pretty clear.” He could still see Mia’s sister glaring at him like he was Jack the Ripper or something.
“The thing is,” Joe said cautiously, “most of us aren’t.”
Sam didn’t like hearing that and it surprised him. But Sam had always liked Joe, and Merry’s husband Alan and Mia’s parents, too. Of course, he’d known going into the marriage that it probably wasn’t going to work out, so he hadn’t gotten close to any of them. But still, they were good people.
“I can understand that,” he admitted, and took a sip of coffee. “What I don’t get is why you’re all here on this cruise.”
“Seriously?” Joe snorted a laugh, drank his coffee then shot a look at his sons, completely wrapped up in some movie apparently starring some weird-looking snowman. Turning his gaze back to Sam, he said, “You should know the Harper family well enough to know that when one of them’s in trouble, they circle the wagons.”
“Against me.”
“Pretty much.”
Nodding, Sam said, “Fine. But this is still between Mia and me.”
“You’d think so, but no.” Shaking his head, Joe continued, “Whatever happens between you two affects everything else. It’s family, Sam.”
On an intellectual level, Sam got it. But otherwise, no. He hadn’t grown up with anything like the Harper family. He was taught to stand on his own—don’t let anyone close and if they do get past your walls, shut down so they can’t affect you.
He’d learned those lessons well. Sam had taken a risk, gone against everything he’d believed and married Mia even knowing it would all come crashing down. If he had re
grets, they were his own. And he wasn’t going to bare his soul for the Harper family, either.
“If you’re here to push me into signing those papers, you didn’t have to bother,” Sam said.
“Yeah, that’s not why I’m here.” He broke off, glared at his son and said, “Charlie, I said no bouncing on the furniture.” Looking at Sam again, he said, “My wife is pretty pissed at you.”
“Yeah. I know.”
“What you don’t know is I don’t agree with her.” He held up one hand and added, “And if you tell her I said that, I’ll claim you’re a liar.”
“Okay...” This was as unexpected as the surprise visit.
“You screwed up.”
“Thanks.” Sam lifted his coffee cup in a silent toast.
“No problem,” Joe said amiably. “But the thing is, one screw-up doesn’t have to end everything. You and Mia were good together. And hell, I like you.”
Sam laughed shortly. “Thanks.”
“So I’m thinking you shouldn’t sign the papers. At least not right away.” Joe shrugged, shot his bouncing son another warning look, then continued, “What the hell, Sam. You’ve got a two-week cruise. Use it. Talk to Mia. Figure out what the hell went wrong and maybe you can fix it.”
Sam already knew what had gone wrong. And talking about it wouldn’t change a damn thing. He just wasn’t husband material. Probably never would be. How could he be? His own father had sucked at all four of his brief marriages and then had spent the next thirty years bouncing from one temporary woman to the next. Not exactly a sterling role model.
There were lots of things Sam wanted to do with Mia, but talking wasn’t one of them.
“I appreciate the moral support, Joe. Seriously. But I don’t think this is salvageable.”
“Huh.” Joe looked at him. “Never pegged you as a quitter.”
Insulted, he said, “Yeah, I’m not.”
“Could have fooled me.”
Sam laughed again. “First a pep talk, then insults?”
Joe shrugged again. “Whatever works, man.” He set his coffee cup down. “Look. Up to you, but you’re both on this boat anyway. Might as well make the most of it, don’t you think?”
Sam frowned thoughtfully, and realized that what Joe was saying almost lined up with his idea about making a deal with Mia. Probably not what the other man had had in mind, but it did slide right in there.
Joe wasn’t waiting for an answer. He’d already turned to his kids. “All right you two! Snow time!”
“Yay!” Charlie jumped off the couch and his shadow, Chris, was right behind him. “Bye, Uncle Sam!” he shouted as he headed for the door.
“Bye!” Chris echoed, following his big brother.
“See you around, Sam...” Joe lifted one hand, then led his kids out the door. Before he closed it behind him though, he said, “Think about it. Talk to Mia. What’ve you got to lose?”
The TV was still on and some silly song was rolling through the suite. Sam didn’t hear it. Instead, he was thinking about what Joe had said and wondering if he should give in to what he wanted—or just let Mia have the ending she was asking for.
Four
Make the most of it.
Sam snorted as he told himself that Joe probably hadn’t meant his advice in the same way Sam was taking it. But for the next two weeks, Sam and Mia would be stranded on this ship. And the Fantasy Nights wasn’t big enough for them to be able to ignore each other for long.
“And why should we?” Frowning, he stared down at the deck below, watching his employees working with the passengers, laughing, talking, making everyone at home.
But while he studied the small crowd, his mind was on Mia. Not married. Not divorced. So didn’t that clear the way for them to be whatever the hell they wanted to be?
And that begged the question—what exactly did Sam want?
That was easy. He wanted Mia. Always had. Since the first time he’d seen her, all he’d been able to think of was getting her alone. Getting her into the nearest bed and keeping her there. That hadn’t changed.
Their marriage had been a mistake, no doubt. But that failure hadn’t killed his desire for her. He didn’t think that was possible.
They could have two weeks together. Sam wouldn’t promise her forever. Not again. But he could give her now.
Of course the moment that thought registered, he remembered that Mia had accused him of only considering the “now.” But hell, that’s all any of them were promised, right? There was no guarantee of tomorrow and yesterday was already gone. So why not focus on now?
All he had to do was bring her around to that same realization. He scowled as he acknowledged that wasn’t going to be easy. But maybe, if she couldn’t be convinced, he could try a little friendly blackmail.
She could move into his suite for the duration of the cruise—and he’d sign her divorce papers.
No. Though everything in him wanted to, damned if he wanted Mia back in his bed because she thought she had no choice. Scowling he was forced to admit that there were some lines he wasn’t prepared to cross.
* * *
“Why did you bring the elf with you?” Mia shook her head as she watched her twin stalk around their suite.
“My choice was...what? Admit he’s not real?” Maya gave her a hard look. “Want me to tell the boys Santa’s not real, too?”
“Of course not.” Mia loved those kids like her own and seeing their excitement for Christmas and Santa was wonderful. She couldn’t wait to experience it all for herself with her own children.
“Well then, Buddy has to be here.” Maya frowned to herself. “You know, he reports to Santa every night on the boys’ behavior. Using that as extortion is the one chance I have to make sure they don’t destroy this boat while we’re on it.”
Mia laughed. “They’re not monsters, Maya.”
Her twin smiled. “No. But they are little kids with too much Christmas excitement rattling around inside them and it’s bound to erupt at some point. Buddy the Elf is my only hope to keep it contained.”
“And you have to do this right now?” Mia leaned back into the navy blue couch, propped her feet on the coffee table in front of her and said, “We’ve only been onboard ship for a couple of hours. What’s the rush?”
Maya sighed and laid her forearm on the crest of her sizable baby bump. “Because Joe’s got the boys out exploring, so I want to take the opportunity to look for elf places while I can.”
“Fine. I’ll help.”
“It needs to be easy enough for the kids to find him in the morning. And I’ll need a few of them, to last over the whole trip.” Maya frowned and shook her head. “I can reuse the spots of course, the kids are so little, they won’t really pay attention. But I’m going to need at least three or four.” She turned that frown on her twin. “When you said you’d help, did you mean today?”
Mia laughed. “Jeez, you’re crabby when you’re pregnant.”
“You try having a tiny human jumping up and down on your bladder like it’s a trampoline and see what kind of mood you’re in.” A moment later, Maya groaned. “I’m sorry honey.”
“It’s okay.”
“No,” Maya said, “it’s really not. I’m not really mad. Just...tense. I guess I’m still worried about Joe. He was so tired when he got back from that Idaho wildfire.”
“He looks good now,” Mia said and knew her sister would worry anyway. Joe and several others had flown from their fire station in Seal Beach to Idaho to help fight a fast-spreading wildfire. And for the five days he was gone, Maya had hardly slept. So it wasn’t just Joe who needed this trip to relax and catch up on some sleep.
“He does.” Maya nodded firmly. “And I’m probably overreacting—hormonal and all.”
“And you love Joe.”
“I do.”
“So...�
� Mia stood up and forced a smile. “Let’s find some hiding spots for Buddy and then go sit on the deck so you can relax a little.”
“That sounds great.”
Mia looked around the suite. There were two bedrooms. Joe, Maya and the boys had one and Mia had the other. And the living area was a good size, so they could surely find someplace to hide an elf.
“Oh,” Maya said, “you should know that Dad says he’s going to talk to Sam.”
“Great,” Mia said on a sigh. “That’ll go well.”
“Oh come on. Dad won’t hurt him,” Maya said. “Much.”
Mia sat down again. “Maybe it was a bad idea bringing all of you guys along on this cruise.”
“Thanks a bunch,” Maya said, opening a cabinet door and shutting it again. “I feel so special now.”
“You know what I mean. Backup is one thing,” Mia said, “but I didn’t want you all to be an attack squad.”
“God, drama queen.” Maya laughed. “Nobody’s attacking Sam. Yet,” she added with a grin. “We just sort of want him to know what he lost.”
“Well, if you have to tell him what he lost, what’s the point?”
“To irritate him, of course.” Maya walked across the room and dropped carefully onto the closest chair. Her smile faded and she looked at her twin with sympathy. “Sweetie, we’re on your side. We won’t do anything you don’t want us to. We just want to be here so Sam can’t crush you again.”
Her head snapped back and she winced at the description. “I wasn’t crushed.”
“Please.” Maya’s eyes rolled.
“Fine.” She had been destroyed when her marriage ended. But she’d mourned what might have been more than what had been. Because if she were honest with herself, the marriage itself hadn’t been worth her tears. She’d been alone for the most part and even when Sam was home, she felt as if she were the only one in the room.
He’d managed to be close to her and as distant as the moon all at the same time. It was as if the moment they got married, Sam had turned inward, shutting her out. The worst part was, she didn’t know why. And probably never would.
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