“We going to kill each other or save Sophia?” asked Cayden.
Hawk spat blood to the side.
“My informant says the wedding is this weekend. We have time to plan this out.”
“Are we just getting her back or taking down the entire family?” asked Hawk.
“It’s too big. The ripples would be endless. The only way to finish this is to marry her, destroying the Morenov Empire once and for all.”
“It’s all I want. We’ll get her back, and I’ll marry her.”
Cayden stared at the other man, wanting to stab him in the heart, but knowing he had no chance at winning over Sophia.
Right now, the focus had to be getting her free, and then they could worry about the aftermath. Should Cayden steal her away? Force her to love him? He exhaled, already feeling crushed.
He could still smell her, feel her, hear her voice.
How long until he forgot it all?
Until he had nothing left to hold on to?
Their breathing began to slow, the anger draining away. He had to admit the rumble had alleviated a lot of his buried stress. Hawk was a worthy opponent. Cayden had been fighting for decades, and usually came out on top.
“Who trained you?” asked Hawk.
“Myself.”
“Your father had a reputation. Must be in your blood.”
“No, I don’t believe in blood. Loyalty is stronger. I had Frank Almeida. He opened his life to me, but Vasily ended that.”
“And you ended Vasily.”
Cayden tilted his head. “Still looking for your revenge?”
“No.” Hawk adjusted his position, wincing briefly. “You were right about him. He killed my parents and pretended to be my savior. I have nothing left. Only a few blurry memories of my mother.”
“And Sophia.”
They met eyes again.
“You love her,” said Hawk, a statement, not a question.
Cayden hoisted himself up to his feet, using the wall for leverage. He wouldn’t admit his feelings to anyone. “Don’t worry, she has her hero. She doesn’t love me.”
“You’re wrong.”
“And that wouldn’t bother you? I thought you wanted to marry her.”
“She’s complicated,” said Hawk.
You’re telling me.
He didn’t ask for clarification, but a small flame came to life in his heart. Hope. He remembered their time together at the trailer. It had felt like love, and he’d never wanted it to end. If he had to choose, he’d forget the entire world and stay in their makeshift paradise forever.
Cayden shuffled his way to the kitchen, feeling like he’d been hit by a truck. He grabbed a smoke and lit up, leaning against the counter. “We have to eat. Want me to order pizza?”
Hawk was still sitting on the floor.
“Pizza? That our only option?”
“Sorry, no fine dining around here, Romeo. Pizza and wings are about it.”
“Whatever, I’m too sore to care.”
Cayden laughed. He couldn’t help it. Their situation was so fucked up that it was comical. Two grown men, killing each other because they both loved the same woman, and forced to work together to save her.
At least he could laugh at his own life.
Hawk chuckled, dropping to his back, one knee bent up. “I wish I could have been there to see Oscar get his comeuppance. I’ve been dreaming about it for weeks.”
“Don’t worry, I pulled out all the stops.”
“Well, thanks for giving me the kill,” said Hawk. “I only wish I had the chance to have my revenge on Vasily. It should have been me.”
“You were so loyal to him. You never questioned how you got in the family?”
“Never. It was blind devotion. Vasily gave me my name—bird of prey. He trained me into the perfect killer.”
He took a drag, sitting on a kitchen chair.
“Did he ever hurt Sophia?”
“He loved her. In his own fucked up way. He could never get over the fact her mother was a whore. It became a fixation.”
“I couldn’t find much on her mother,” said Cayden.
“She worked at one of his whore-houses. One of the young Russians he’d smuggled over. She tried to hold the paternity over his head when she was pregnant. As soon as she gave birth, Vasily killed her, and tested the baby. Sophia was his.”
“He killed her for nothing?”
“No, he would have anyway.” Hawk came over and sat across the table from him. “Like I said, I never questioned the shit he did.”
“Sophia know about it?”
Hawk shook his head. “I never had the heart to tell her the truth. It would destroy her. Even after everything I learned about my family, I still don’t want her to hate her own father. The man’s dead, and he did love her.”
Cayden respected Hawk for putting Sophia first. Memories made a man. He knew that firsthand. He only wished he had more good ones to reflect on.
Sophia wanted to hate her father, but he saw the hurt in her eyes. All she’d wanted from Vasily was love, unconditional love.
****
Rather than waiting for food delivery, they decided to walk to Bruno’s Pizzeria to pick up the pizza. It wasn’t too far of a walk. The area was a cesspool, the kind of place good families warned their kids to stay far away from. They passed a couple guys doing a drug deal on the corner.
“Nice neighborhood,” Hawk said.
“Am I supposed to be insulted?”
He shrugged. Hawk was too damn tired to fight anymore.
“You get used to it. I’ve lived around here most of my life,” said Cayden “Even the cops ignore it for the most part.”
Vasily may have been a bastard, but he only provided the best. Hawk was used to the highest standards from food and clothes and everything in between. “But you can probably live anywhere you want. I know how much contracts pay.”
The Morenov family dabbled in just about everything—drugs, women, contracts, extortion. All Hawk knew was crime and sin. He was immune to the violence.
“I guess this neighborhood is the closest thing I have to a family. I mean, they’re not the greatest roots, but they’re all I have.”
He thought his life had been more, but it was just as empty now. Hawk had nothing left.
“Never thought of leaving the life behind, maybe getting married and having some kids?”
Cayden scoffed.
The pizzeria came into view. He remembered it from the night he went in search of Sophia. “This is how I found you,” he said.
“What are you talking about?”
“There was a pizza box in the back of your car when you kidnapped Vladimir. I followed the crumbs right to your door.”
Cayden smirked. “You’re good at tracking.” He was quiet for a minute. “I should have killed that fucker. That’s what I get for having mercy.”
“You’re right. There’s no place for mercy in this line of work. Vasily always emphasized the point.”
He pushed open the glass door, and they entered the familiar pizza place. Hawk took a seat at an open table while Cayden went to order at the counter. The place smelled like a mix of food and cigarette smoke. He felt dirty just sitting there.
“Won’t be long,” said Cayden, sitting across from him.
Hawk had been holding onto a lot of questions. Something had changed between Sophia and Cayden after their last stint together. His imagination had been driving him crazy.
They sat in awkward silence for a while, and Cayden pulled out a cigarette and eased back in his chair. He started watching the boxing match on the small wall-mounted television.
“Where’d you take Sophia the week you were hiding her out?”
“One of my properties,” he said absently. “Somewhere I lay low when things are too hot.”
He nodded. “What did she think of it? I know she’s used to a certain quality of life.”
Cayden took another drag. “I never would have guessed she was
a mafia princess. She didn’t mind roughing it. Besides the lack of A/C, I think she actually liked it.”
Hawk cracked his knuckles, heat creeping up his collar.
“She seemed attached to you after that week. Odd to fall for the enemy.”
Cayden looked him in the eyes. He leaned forward and used the ashtray. “It went both ways. And I was saving her, if you’ve forgotten.”
“What the fuck happened between the two of you?” he said between grated teeth, trying to rein in his volatile passion and not attract attention from the other patrons.
The other man only chuckled. “Relax, Romeo. I didn’t fuck her, if that’s what you’re getting at.”
“Then why does she love you? I know she does, so don’t bullshit me,” said Hawk.
He shrugged. “She loves you, too. Fickle little thing.”
“I’d die for her. She’s all I have.”
“Then we have something else in common,” said Cayden.
They both leaned away from each other, not saying a word. The teen behind the counter brought them the pizza box. Cayden paid, and they walked back to the apartment.
“Oh yeah, a junkie gave me your address. You should think twice who you trust with your personal information.”
Cayden growled. “Amelia. We went to school together. Things didn’t turn out so well for her.”
They arrived back at the apartment and ate in silence.
Although he was used to fine dining, he had to admit the pizza was good. Maybe he was just too hungry to care.
Why did he feel so comfortable around Cayden? Even with the rivalry between them, he felt at ease around the other man. Hawk had never had close friendships, forever taught to guard his emotions. Trust created weakness. He didn’t know how to be normal. Wasn’t sure where to draw the line in social situations.
Cayden got up and poured himself a glass of water, then sat on the couch. He began to disassemble his guns.
“I just realized what’s missing around here. Where the fuck is my cat?”
“She’s safe.”
Cayden smirked.
Hawk had no intention of killing the guy’s cat. She was being boarded at a veterinarian’s office downtown. He thought it would be good to have the cat for leverage, plus he worried about her being abandoned in the apartment.
“So, when did you first learn to shoot?” Cayden asked, not looking up from his task.
Hawk had never really reflected on it. He thought back to his childhood. He’d only been in Vasily’s home for a few months before a gun had been thrust in his hands. The hitmen laughed at the child soldier, but he earned their respect with his natural skills with weapons.
“Ten years old. Vasily wanted me trained in everything. Guns are as much as part of me as anything else,” he said. “What about you?”
“One of the foster fathers I stayed with was a hunter, so my first experience as a kid was with a rifle. Long fucking hours waiting in a blind. It wasn’t until I was a teen that I really started experimenting.”
Hawk sat on a chair in the living area, getting comfortable. This was nice. And fucked up.
“I had nothing to do with what went down at the bakery. I just wanted you to know that.”
Cayden briefly glanced up at him, nodding once.
“I was the one to find them.”
“I’m sorry,” Hawk said. He meant it.
Cayden’s jaw twitched. “It was a bloodbath. What I don’t understand is why not just kill him? Why torture and slaughter a helpless man, his wife, and their three kids? He didn’t even own a gun. He was a fucking baker.”
“Vasily was a sick bastard. Before I killed Vladimir, he told me some of the details of my parents’ murder. I had no idea. If I’d known, things would have been different.”
“The only good thing that came out of him was his daughter.”
He agreed one hundred percent.
Hawk watched as Cayden continued cleaning his guns, using oils and different techniques. They could probably teach each other a lot.
“Did you plan on killing Sophia?”
Cayden scoffed. “That was the plan.”
“What changed?”
He leaned back, losing interest in his work. “She wasn’t what I expected.”
Sophia was fire and innocence intertwined. Hawk didn’t need an explanation.
“What I don’t understand is how you can be ready to die for her, but you don’t want her for yourself? What’s your reasoning?”
Cayden licked his lips, appearing to want to crawl out of his own skin. “She deserves better, okay?”
“And you think I’m a good catch?”
His brow furrowed. “I wouldn’t go that far. Don’t you have a history together? How long have you known her?”
“All my life. She was my ward since she turned eighteen. Until I found out what Vasily did to my family, I was very good at denying myself.” Hawk clasped his fingers together. “You have any childhood sweethearts?”
Cayden shook his head. “I never get attached. And most of my childhood is blacked out.”
“I’ve been in this business forever. Seen all kinds of people, from all walks of life. When it comes to childhoods, they can shape a person. No matter how much you think you’re in control as an adult. Being beaten can make you strong, sometimes cruel, and the sexual abuse can really fuck with a person’s head, mess them up beyond repair.”
“And you’re telling me this, why?”
“I can see it written all over you,” said Hawk. “Why else am I still breathing? You’re afraid of commitment because of whatever you went through.”
Cayden kept quiet. He bristled, appearing uniquely threatened that Hawk managed to peel away his layers. He wasn’t trying to be an asshole.
“You have a fancy degree, too? Am I an open book now? No way do I plan to admit the horrors I’ve lived through in foster care. Stick to contracts because you’re a terrible shrink.”
“Say you don’t love her, and I’ll leave you alone.”
“Love isn’t the question. It’s about what Sophia deserves. I have nothing to offer.”
Hawk leaned back in his chair. He could see himself in Cayden. Feel his pain. “You’re cutting yourself short. Sophia’s a smart woman. She wouldn’t be drawn to an evil man.”
Cayden blocked him out.
Hawk wasn’t going to push him. What was the point? After Sophia was free, they’d probably never see him again.
They crashed for the night. After everything they’d been through, a good night of sleep was essential.
Hawk didn’t wake up until the morning light hit him in the face from the narrow basement windows. He sat up on the sofa, feeling sore everywhere. His hand immediately went for his 9mm by his side. Everything was in place.
He looked toward the bedroom.
Cayden wasn’t in the bed.
Hawk made his way toward the bedroom but heard the static of the shower. Something caught his eye. A piece of paper poked out the top of Cayden’s jacket pocket. He pulled out the folded piece of paper, and it turned out to be a pencil drawing of Cayden. He stared at all the detail, and he knew right away it was drawn by Sophia.
She’d painted Hawk’s portrait a while back.
Sophia said she loved him, but she loved Cayden, too. He’d hoped he was wrong, and tried to ignore it, but it was clear.
How could he ask her to forget about a man she’d fallen in love with?
He’d never give her up. Hawk had claimed her, and he wanted to marry her. He’d do anything for Sophia—but what if she wanted Cayden more? Could he walk away?
Fuck, he knew he couldn’t.
As soon as the water stopped, he folded the paper and slipped it back in the jacket pocket and pushed away his emotions. He was getting a complex, worried about losing Sophia, but also feeling sorry for another man. Hawk wished he still hated Cayden with the same passion. It would make things so much easier.
He went to the kitchen.
I
t was nasty. Dishes in the sink, cheap laminate counters, and peeling paint on the cupboards. Nothing like he was used to in the Morenov mansion.
How could Cayden live like this? Hawk was used to everything money could buy.
Cayden came in the room, rubbing a towel over his head.
“You have coffee in here?” asked Hawk.
“In the cupboard.”
Hawk opened and closed the doors, finding the instant coffee container. “This shit?”
“Hey, I’m not forcing it down your throat.”
Hawk grimaced. “I’m going to jump in the shower.”
“I think I used all the hot water but help yourself.”
He couldn’t wait to get settled, to have a fucking address, dry-cleaned clothes, and plush towels. Hawk wanted the happily ever after with Sophia. And he wanted to hate Cayden.
Nothing was going according to plan.
Hawk looked at himself in the bathroom mirror, touching his cheek with a finger. The shadow of a bruise already appeared on his cheek. He’d initiated the fight, but it was because of his own guilt. Cayden had gone above and beyond keeping Sophia safe. Everyone else was out to destroy her. It was a big world, and Hawk would have his hands full once it was just him taking care of her.
His wounds were healing up well, and besides the new bruises, he was almost as good as new.
When he came back into the kitchen after washing and dressing, there were takeout coffee and pastries on the table. He raised an eyebrow at the offering.
“I did a quick coffee run. Wouldn’t want you to go slumming.”
Hawk took a seat, taken down a few pegs. “You have money, don’t you?”
“Sure. Killing pays well.”
“Then why live like this?”
Cayden exhaled, pushing his hair back. “I thought I made it clear yesterday. Look, not everyone lives the way you do. This neighborhood, it’s not unique. Most people are struggling from paycheck to paycheck. You say Sophia was sheltered? Well, hate him or not, Vasily raised you with a silver spoon in your mouth.”
Hawk scoffed. “Vasily was a beast. I can’t tell you how many times he beat me, how many fucked up things he forced me to do before I even had hair on my balls. And I didn’t live in the house with the family. I lived in the staff’s wing, always reminded that I was a charity case.”
Witness Protection Page 16
