Do Penguins Have Knees?

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Do Penguins Have Knees? Page 1

by David Feldman




  DO PENGUINS

  HAVE KNEES?

  An Imponderables®

  Book

  David Feldman

  Illustrated by Kassie Schwan

  For Rick Kot

  Contents

  Preface

  Why don’t you feel or see a mosquito bite until after it begins to itch?

  Why doesn’t milk in the refrigerator ever taste as cold as the water or soda in the refrigerator?

  Why are address labels on subscription magazines usually placed upside-down?

  Why are there dents on the top of cowboy hats?

  Why do grocery coupons state that they have a “cash value of 1/100 of 1¢”?

  How and why did 7UP get its name?

  Why do the back wheels of bicycles click when you are coasting or back pedaling?

  Why do male birds tend to be more colorful than females? Is there any evolutionary advantage?

  What does the USPS do with mail it can’t deliver or return because of lack of a return address?

  Why are baseball dugouts built so that they are half below ground?

  Why do trains with more than one locomotive often have one (or more) of the locomotives turned backwards?

  Why is there steam coming up from the streets of New York?

  How did they keep beer cold in the saloons of the Old West?

  What is the official name of the moon?

  Why is Rhode Island called an island when it obviously isn’t an island?

  Why do blacktop roads get lighter in color as they age?

  Why must we push both the “record” and “play” switches to record on an audio tape recorder, and only the “record” on the VCR?

  How do bus drivers get into a bus when the door handle is inside the bus?

  Why is the lowest-ranked admiral called a rear admiral?

  Why was April 15 chosen as the due date for taxes?

  What’s the difference between a lake and a pond?

  What’s the difference between an ocean and a sea?

  Why does the United States Mint use a private firm—UPS—to ship its coin sets?

  How do figure skaters keep from getting dizzy while spinning? Is it possible to eye a fixed point while spinning so fast?

  Why do straws in drinks sometimes sink and sometimes rise to the surface?

  Why is the tenor oboe called an “English horn” when it is neither English nor a horn?

  Why are our fingers different lengths? For example, is there a reason why the “pinkie” is shorter than the “index”?

  Why are sticks of margarine and butter thicker and shorter in the western United States and longer and narrower in the East?

  Why do plastic milk cases contain a warning that their “Unauthorized use is illegal and enforced by health department and penal codes”?

  Why does shampoo lather so much better on the second application?

  Why don’t cigarette butts burn? Is there a particular barrier between the tobacco and the filter that prevents the burn?

  What are you hearing when you shake a light bulb?

  Why do fluorescent lights make a plinking noise when you turn them on?

  Why do cats like so much to be scratched behind the ears?

  Why aren’t there plums in plum pudding? And why is it called a pudding rather than a cake?

  What do the little red letter and number stamped on the back of my envelope mean?

  Why do owners or handlers use the word “sic” to instruct a dog to “get him”?

  In baseball scoring, why is the letter “K” chosen to designate a strikeout?

  What are the skins of hot dogs made of?

  Why is comic strip print in capital letters?

  Why are peanuts listed under the ingredients of “plain” M&Ms?

  Why do the volume levels of different cable networks vary enormously compared to those of broadcast TV networks?

  Why are men’s shoe heels built in layers?

  Why are horses’ heights measured to the shoulder rather than to the top of the head?

  Why are the edges on the long side of lasagna usually crimped?

  What happens to your social security number when you die? How and when, if ever, is it reassigned?

  What exactly are we smelling when we enjoy the “new-car smell”?

  Why are some cleansers marked “For industrial or commercial use only”? How are they different from household cleansers?

  Why are the letters “Q” and “Z” missing from the telephone buttons?

  Why is the middle digit of North American area codes always a 0 or a 1?

  Why were duels always fought at dawn? Or is this depiction in fiction and movies not true?

  What exactly are the liberal arts, and who designated them so?

  Why do birds tend to stand on one foot while sleeping? Why do birds tend to bury their heads under their wings while sleeping?

  Why is a marshal or sheriff’s badge traditionally a five-pointed star but a deputy’s six-pointed?

  When you wear a girdle, where does the fat go?

  What do mosquitoes do during the day? And where do they go?

  What does the “CAR-RT SORT” printed next to the address on envelopes mean?

  Why was “pi” chosen as the Greek letter to signify the ratio of a circle’s circumference to its diameter?

  Why can’t you buy macadamia nuts in their shells?

  If heat rises, why does ice form on the top of water in lakes and ponds?

  What happens to the 1,000 or more prints after films have finished their theatrical runs?

  Why is balsa wood classified as a hardwood when it is soft? What is the difference between a softwood and a hardwood?

  Do earlobes serve any particular or discernible function?

  Why does butter get darker and harder in the refrigerator after it is opened?

  Why are dance studios usually located on the second floor of buildings?

  Why are 25-watt light bulbs more expensive than 40-, 60-, 75-, and 100-watt bulbs?

  Why are water towers built so high?

  Why are some watermelon seeds white and some black?

  What is the purpose of the holes near the end of electric plug prongs?

  Why do paper mills smell so bad?

  How are lane reflectors fastened onto the road so that they aren’t moved or crushed?

  Why does Nabisco put the tiny picture of Niagara Falls on its Shredded Wheat box?

  Why do automobile batteries have to be so heavy? Why can’t they be miniaturized?

  Why do automatic icemakers in home freezers make crescent-shaped pieces rather than cubes?

  What are those computer scrawls (similar to Universal Product Codes) found on the bottom right of envelopes? How do they work?

  If water is composed of two parts hydrogen and one part oxygen, both common elements, why can’t droughts be eliminated by combining the two to produce water?

  Why does your voice sound higher and funny when you ingest helium?

  Why is the French horn designed for left-handers?

  Why do milk cartons indicate “open other end” on one side of the spout and “to open” on the other when both sides look identical?

  Why do we feel warm or hot when we blush?

  During a hernia exam, why does the physician say, “Turn your head and cough”? Why is the cough necessary? Is the head turn necessary?

  Why is the “R” trademark symbol on Pepsi labels placed after the second “p” in “Pepsi” rather than after the words “Pepsi” or “Cola”?

  Why do magazine and newspaper editors force you to skip pages to continue an article at the back of the magazine/newspaper?

  What does the EXEMPT sign next to some railr
oad crossing signs mean?

  What flavor is bubble gum supposed to be?

  What makes bubble gum blow better bubbles than regular chewing gum?

  Why does Bazooka Joe wear an eye patch?

  What is the white stuff on baseball card bubble gum and why is it there?

  Why are baseball card wrappers covered with wax?

  Why do some binoculars have an adjustment only for the right eyepiece?

  Why do scabs always itch so much?

  What is the purpose of the holes on the sides of men’s hats? Decoration? Ventilation? A receptacle for feathers? Or?

  How do they peel and clean baby shrimp?

  How do football officials measure first down yardage with chains, especially when they go on field to confirm first downs?

  How did Dr Pepper get its name? Was there ever a real Dr. Pepper?

  Why is the home plate in baseball such a weird shape?

  Why do hospital gowns tie at the back?

  What’s the difference between white chocolate and brown chocolate?

  Why aren’t large-type books as big as they used to be?

  What causes the green-tinged potato chips we sometimes find? Are they safe to eat?

  Why are tortilla chips so much more expensive than potato chips?

  Does the moon have any effect on lakes or ponds? If not, why does it only seem to affect oceans’ tides? Why don’t lakes have tides?

  Why do the backs of social security cards say “Do not laminate” when we are expected to keep the cards for our entire lives?

  Why are nonsweet wines called “dry”?

  Why do the rear windows of taxicabs (and some other cars) not go down all the way?

  What is the two-tone signal at the start of many rented videotapes?

  How was 911 chosen as the uniform emergency telephone number?

  Why do birds bother flying back north after migrating to the south?

  Why are the oceans salty? What keeps the oceans at the same level of saltiness?

  How do 3-D movies and 3-D glasses work?

  What use is the appendix to us? What use are our tonsils to us?

  Where does the moisture go when wisps of clouds disappear in front of your eyes?

  Why is frozen orange juice just about the only frozen product that is cheaper than its fresh counterpart?

  How are the subscription insert cards placed in magazines? What keeps them from falling out as the magazine is sent through the postal system?

  Why do we put thermometers under our tongues? Would it make any difference if we put them above our tongues if our mouths were closed?

  Do penguins have knees?

  How do they make hot dog buns that are partially sliced?

  How do they fork split English muffins? What causes the ridges in English muffins?

  Why do cat hairs tend to stick to our clothes more than those of dogs or other pets?

  Why are you never supposed to touch a halogen light bulb with your fingers?

  Why is there an “H” inside of the “C” in the hockey uniform of the Montreal Canadiens?

  Why don’t Radio Shack stores use cash registers?

  How do they decide where to put thumbnotches in dictionaries?

  What is the purpose of the button you press to unlock the key from the ignition on some cars? If it is a worthwhile mechanism, why isn’t it on all cars?

  How did Kodak get its name? Is it true that the name comes from the sound of the shutter?

  Why are there ridges (often painted black) on the sides of most school buses?

  Why do all the armed forces start marching with the left foot? Is there any practical reason? Is this custom the same all over the world?

  Why do rabbits wiggle their noses all the time?

  Why are there legless ducks in the crest of Cadillacs?

  What is the technical definition of a sunset or sunrise? How is it determined at what time the sun sets or rises? Why is there natural light before sunrise and after sunset?

  Why is pubic hair curly?

  Why are there tiny holes in the ceiling of my car?

  What does the “YKK” emblazoned on my zipper mean?

  Why do VCR manuals advise you to disconnect the machine during storms?

  In baseball, why is the pitcher’s mound located 60′6″ from home plate?

  Why does grease turn white when it cools?

  Why is the skin around our finger knuckles wrinkled when the skin covering our knees is not?

  Where does all of the old extra oil in your car’s engine lurk after an oil change?

  Why do fish float upside-down when they die?

  Why do some companies use mail-in refunds rather than coupons?

  Why do grocery coupons have expiration dates?

  Why do only female mosquitoes eat human blood? What do male mosquitoes eat?

  If the third prong on an electrical plug is for grounding and shock protection, why don’t all plugs have three prongs?

  Why does menthol feel cool to the taste and cool to the skin?

  Why do bridges freeze before nearby roads?

  Why can’t they make the flavor in chewing gum last longer?

  What is the purpose of the plastic bags in airline oxygen masks when they don’t inflate?

  10 New Frustables

  Frustables Update

  The Frustables That Will Not Die

  Letters

  Acknowledgments

  Searchable Terms

  Master Index of Imponderability

  Help!

  About the Author

  Other Books by David Feldman

  Credits

  Cover

 

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