by Lea Kirk
She did, and Gunner reached to help the baby’s head emerge. “Almost there, little mama.” The tiny head resting against his palm was warm and wet. Holy shit, this is amazing.
One more strong push from April, and Gunner’s hands were full of slimy infant. Turning the baby over, his breath caught in his throat. The infant’s solemn blue eyes regarded him with a depth of trust only an innocent could give.
“Whoa, buddy, if you look at your mama like that, the rest of us guys won’t stand a chance.”
April made a sound somewhere between a laugh and a sob. “Is he breathing?”
“He is.” Wonder at the miracle of new life filled Gunner as he gave the baby a visual once-over. “And he has ten fingers and toes, dark blue eyes...and he’s bald as a billiard. See?” Gunner turned the infant to face his mother.
~*~
“Oh! Baby!” April’s words squeaked out as her heart expanded with love. He looks so much like Dave.
Garrison frowned. “I’d give him to you, but he’s still attached to—”
The laundry room door opened, and Garrison’s face lit up as though the cavalry had rode in, not just Healer Dacian.
“Li-Min said you were having the baby, April.” The blue-skinned Matiran smiled at her as he knelt next to Garrison. “I thought I might be able to assist, but it looks like everything is under control. Well done, Gunner.”
“Thanks, but you can take over now. I really don’t know what to do next.” Gunner’s forehead creased, underscoring his uncertainty. Poor guy.
Dante Dacian’s fingers glowed faintly as they rested on David’s belly. April’s insides quivered as she watched him use his preternatural Gift to examine her baby. “Is he okay?” Please, oh please, let him be fine.
David gave a small cough, then made a sucking motion with his lips. The healer’s brown-eyed gaze met hers and he smiled. “Perfectly healthy and hungry.” He set to cutting the umbilical cord with an efficiency that could only come from experience. “Gunner, wrap him in a clean blanket, please.”
All she could do was stare at the miracle now cradled in the crook of Garrison’s arm.
“One more push, please, April,” Dante said, resting one hand on her belly.
As she pushed, the healer’s hand glowed a faint bluish-white. The after-birth slid from her womb with barely any effort on her part. Dante straightened her ruined skirt and gave her a fatherly smile. “We’ll finish clean-up in a few minutes. Gunner, hand the little one to his mother before she knocks you down and takes him.”
Garrison knelt at her side, placing her son in her arms. “Here you go, little mama. Say hello to your beautiful baby boy.”
Hot tears flowed down her cheeks as she accepted the ill-wrapped bundle. He’s so tiny and light. She placed a tender kiss on his forehead. “Hello, little David. Welcome to the world.”
Chapter Three
May
Gunner stepped into the temporary Terr Base One office cube he shared with his platoon. Nine sets of eyes turned in his direction.
“What the hell is that, Colonel?”
Gunner shot a glare at the young man gaping at him from behind one desk “What is what, Corporal Hicks?”
“That,” Hicks pointed, “attached to your chest.”
“It’s called a baby, Hicks.” Idiot. “Ever seen one?” Gunner curled a protective arm around the warm bundle of three-month-old infant sleeping in the front pack. David didn’t even stir. The kid could sleep through a raging thunder-storm.
“Hell, yeah, but not attached to you.”
That was certainly true. The rest of the guys snickered.
Another young man leaned forward in his chair. “Sweet on the mama?”
“O’Ryan,” Benji Reyes growled.
Gunner raised his brows at the boy before moving to his own desk.
A round of hooting laughter erupted. Then O’Ryan piped up. “Hey, Colonel. Did any of our orders come in from the UDF yet? By fall, I wanna be in deep space meeting hot alien babes.”
Gunner tapped his data device—a black, palm-size apparatus—at the corner of his desk. Instantly, the Matirans’ answer to the computer displayed his messages on the desk’s smooth surface. “Nothing today. Keep your dick in your pants, O’Ryan. The Matirans are very serious about how you treat women, especially their women. No good time is worth your life.”
Stupid ass-clown was at least two years older than April, yet sometimes he behaved like a pre-pubescent boy. Granted, the kid didn’t have a fraction of the responsibility she did, but come on. Hot alien babes?
“No problem, Colonel. I ain’t messin’ this up.”
“Better not, or I’ll come after you myself.” As if Gunner was a saint. The more time he spent with April, the more he wanted her. Terrian men, by nature, did not have the same degree of self-control as their Matiran counter parts. At least, he didn’t. And there was the rub. He was sweet on a woman who was fourteen years his junior. At best, she might see him as an older brother. At worst—his gut muscles clenched—a father figure. You don’t stand a chance, Reed.
He gazed down at David. Just an hour ago the little guy had been howling about…whatever babies howl about, and April had been near tears. Gunner had gone into command-mode, packed the baby up, and sent the mother to her room for a much needed nap. Sleep deprivation was a bitch. April’s expression had been a mixture of shock and relief. Now he had about two hours before David would wake up ready for lunch. Good think Li-min had packed a couple of bottles.
Gunner stroked his finger over the boy’s downy soft cheek. From the first moment this tiny child looked into his eyes, he was hooked. And, yeah, he was sweet on the mama, for all the good it’d do him. And therein lay another dilemma. Eventually, his orders would come. But his feelings for these two people…well, it was enough to give any man second thoughts.
~*~
April’s hands clawed at the brick and mortar debris of the collapsed building, desperation an ever-tightening band across her chest. “Please. Please!”
Dave’s breath wheezed ominously. Had something punctured his lung? No, she couldn’t think like that. She wouldn’t! He’d be okay once she got him out from under the rubble of the collapsed building. He had to be.
“April….”
“I’m here, Dave. I’m not leaving without you, I swear to God.”
He exhaled another wheezing breath. “They’ll be here for you soon.”
“Stop it! They’re not taking us away. We’ll hide from them.”
“You’re going to be okay, April,” he murmured. “You and our baby.”
Our what? Her hands moved over her abdomen, and she met his crystal blue gaze. How could he know? She hadn’t even taken a pregnancy test yet to confirm her suspicions.
“I’m not going with you, pumpkin. Protect him, and protect yourself. Promise me.” The fingers of his free hand encircled her wrist. “Don’t be afraid to love again.”
A dry choking sound escaped her as the muzzle of some sort of olive drab weapon came between them to rest against Dave’s forehead. His eyes shifted up behind her to meet those of his executioner.
A scream burst from April and she bolted upright on her bed. Her breath came in short, sharp gasps, and her heart beat as wild and fast as a hummingbird’s. It was a dream. A hard shiver wracked her entire body.
Her bedroom door burst open and late afternoon light surrounded Garrison as he filled the doorway, his brow creased with worry. “April?”
She opened her mouth, but nothing came out. Little David stirred in his cradle. Wasn’t he with Garrison for the afternoon?
Garrison was at the side of the cradle faster than she thought anyone could move. He bent and slid the binky into her baby’s searching mouth, holding it there with his finger until David clamped onto its soothing presence.
As the baby relaxed back into sleep, the corners of Garrison’s mouth pulled upward in a tender smile. Was it really possible that Da
vid was his first experience caring for a baby?
Garrison straightened, his gaze locking with hers as he placed his finger to his lips. Then moved to the bedside and scooped her up into his arms.
“What? Garrison…?” What is he doing?
“Shh.” He carried her out of her bedroom, toeing the door closed before heading in the direction of the sunroom. “You need a little privacy, and David needs a little sleep. He had an exhausting day at the office.”
Her lips twitched and she gave in to the smile. There was no arguing the obvious. She released a soft sigh, and allowed her head to rest against his shoulder. Over the past three months, he had become a constant presence in her life. When he wasn’t on duty, he was here at the orphanage helping in whatever way he could. He’d even taken David to work with him today to give her a break. And last week Li-Min had joked that they may as well add another room to the building for him.
They entered the deserted sunroom. Garrison made a beeline for the white wicker-like bench against the back wall and lowered himself onto the cushion without dropping her in the process. He said nothing, just held her. No questions, no pressure to do or say anything. It’s like he knows I need space.
She breathed in his scent, a mixture of fresh ocean breeze and something woodsy. The room warmed with the afternoon sun streaming through the windows. Outside, birds chirped and the trees were budding with the season. Was it really spring already? A full year since her old life had crashed to a sudden, agonizing end.
Garrison’s fingers stroked her arm. His hands were rough with calluses, yet warm and gentle. The same hands that had guided her son into the world now comforted her. A tough-as-nails military man with a soft side—what woman wouldn’t want that? One whose heart didn’t still beat for another. Would she ever feel for another man what she’d felt for Dave? There was no telling what the future held, but not being honest with Garrison now was wrong.
“I dreamed about the last time I saw Dave.” She swallowed as her throat constricted. “Same dream at least once a week since David was born.”
“I suspected.” His arms tightened around her, and he buried his face against her hair. “Dammit, April, what I’d give to go back and change that moment for you. I’d take Dave’s place in a heartbeat to spare you and little David the pain and loss. But I can’t.”
“And I can’t stop loving him. Do you understand, Garrison?” How unfair that he would give his life for her sake, but she couldn’t give him anything in return. Not even hope. I’m so sorry, Garrison.
The pressure of his embrace did not lessen, but his head moved in a slow nod and he kissed the top of her head. “I understand. But you know I’ll still be here for you and David as long as I can. I have a vested interest in his welfare, and yours.”
That, she could appreciate. Garrison was fiercely loyal, to his friends and to his duty. If only she could give him what he deserved. But, those feelings weren’t there. All she could do was nod as hot, silent tears slid down her cheeks.
Chapter Four
October
“Don’t put that in your mouth, buddy. Ice plant doesn’t taste very good.” Gunner folded his letter of acceptance and orders from the Unified Defense Fleet and shoved them back into his coat pocket. “Mama would not be happy with me if you ate it.”
David looked at him with those crystal-blue peepers of his. “Ga?” The boy opened his chubby hand and shook it, but the tubular leaf stuck to his palm. “Uh-oh.”
“Here, let me help.” Gunner flicked the leaf with one finger, and it dropped to the ground.
Looking first at the leaf, then up at Gunner, the little boy laughed, his round cheeks pink from the crisp autumn air. Gunner’s heart squeezed at the joyful sound. He couldn’t love this kid more if David were his own son.
But he’s not my son.
A heavy sigh slipped out. Last night he’d made a decision, and today he had to break the news to April. He would accept his orders with the UDF. Then he’d have a week to report in for his two-year tour of space duty. He didn’t want to leave, but it didn’t seem she would ever be ready to let him be more than a good friend. She was still in love with Dave. And at her age, with all the romantic notions of youth, that wasn’t unreasonable.
There was a good probability that she’d be relieved to see him go. Or maybe she’d ask him to stay. Reed, you’re a pathetic lost cause.
He checked his watch. Almost naptime. “Let’s go, buddy. Mama’s waiting.”
David fit into the crook of his arm as though it was custom-made to hold the boy. Gunner strode through the town, greeting others who greeted him. At least people no longer asked why he carried April’s kid around. The innocent reminders that David wasn’t his son had shredded his heart.
The orphanage cube came into view at the top of the rise, and Gunner stole a glance at the child cradled against him. David’s eyelids drooped, then closed with a sigh of surrender.
Li-Min met them inside the front entrance, reaching for the sleeping baby. Gunner waved her off and she gave him an understanding smile. Turning, she shooed the kids in the room toward the back door and the playground beyond. Bless that woman.
He treaded the hallway as quietly as humanly possible in Army boots, then gave a light rap on April’s door. No answer. He nudged it open with one shoulder. “We’re back, Mama.”
The sound of running water came from the direction of her bathroom. In the shower. No problem. He’d become an expert at putting David down for naps. Gunner settled the little guy on the mattress. Perfect.
David’s eyes popped open, and he began to fuss. Not so perfect. “Binky. Where’s the binky?” Gunner cast a look rapidly around the cradle. Not here. Not on the night table. Not on April’s bed.
Crap. He was doomed.
Wait—the bathroom. It had to be there. But so was April, and wouldn’t she be thrilled if he walked in now? David’s pre-cry coughs were reminder enough as to who was really in charge.
“Well, hell.” Gunner scooped up the baby and stuck his pinky in the wide-open mouth. David clamped down around it and sucked hard.
Gunner gave the bathroom door a tap with his toe, pushing it open partway. Steam swirled around him. “April, it’s us. We’re not peeking, honest. We just need the….”
He froze, his eyes transfixed by the sight before him. April stood over the sink, her head resting on her arms against the mirror. Droplets of water clung to her naked body. Damp, dark-gold tendrils of hair stuck to her neck, shoulders and back. He couldn’t stop his gaze from traveling downward. Faint silvery lines etched her softly rounded belly, signifying her hard-earned rank of motherhood. Each line was a badge of honor in his eyes.
Why was the water running if she wasn’t in the shower? His gaze traveled back up, stopping at her full breasts. They leaked steady drips as she leaned over the sink. Good God, she was gorgeous.
And, she was sobbing her sweet heart out.
He swallowed hard then cleared his throat. “April, what’s wrong?”
She turned her head enough to meet his gaze, her eyelashes clumped together with dampness, and her eyes puffy. “The hot water makes them leak.” Her voice was small and high pitched. “I just want my body back.”
Apparently, being completely exposed to him didn’t faze her. Don’t focus on anything below her chin. He swallowed hard against the lump rising in his throat and reached for a towel from the hook. “Here’s a towel, little mama. I’ll put David down and be right back.”
He snatched the binky off a shelf, then hurried back into April’s bedroom to lay David in his crib.
“Come on, buddy.” He inserted the binky between the baby’s puckered lips and continued to croon. “Nighty-night. Mama needs some grown-up conversation time.”
David seemed to be on board with the plan. Sucking hard on his binky, the boy’s eyelids drooped closed again, his fists loose at either side of his fuzzy head. Gunner stroked his finger against the velvet cheek. “
Mama thanks you, buddy.” And so do I.
Okay, now for Mama. Gunner pushed the bathroom door open a crack. The shower was off now, which had to be a good sign. “Are you decent, April?”
“Yes.” Her voice sounded so small and lost.
“May I come in?”
“Yeah.”
He gave the door a tentative push in case she wasn’t as ready as she’d indicated. There she was, sitting on the edge of the tub, wrapped in the towel. She’d planted her elbows on her knees to prop her chin on her palms, and her face wore a forlorn expression. Man, his heart ached for her.
“I’m really sorry about barging in...I thought you were in the shower.”
“I left the water on so no one would hear me crying,” she murmured, not looking up.
Ouch. He moved closer, and eased himself down next to her, then leaned his forearms on his thighs. “April, I know this hasn’t been easy for you. My mom was a single parent too, and it was rough.”
She sniffled. “Is that why you’re still around? Because of your mom?”
He compressed his lips and blew a sigh through his nose. “That’s one reason.”
“Oh.”
“And David, well, he’s pretty special, y’know. I’ve never been a part of someone’s entire life.” Boy, was that ever the truth. “I was pretty blessed to be in the right place at the right time when he made his entrance.”
April sniffled again. The front of her towel was damp around her breasts. How could he concentrate with that enticing scene staring him in the face? Look her in the eye, moron.
No sooner had he done so, she looked up at him. “I’m sorry, too. I kind of freaked out.”
“I can’t blame you. You’re right. Your body hasn’t been yours in over a year.” If only her body weren’t so soft and round. If only her eyes weren’t so beautiful. If only he hadn’t fallen in love with her the first time he’s laid eyes on her in that slave cell.
But there was still the matter of his orders. Give it one last shot. The worst she can say is no. He took in a deep breath. “You know what I think? I think that Dave would be very proud of you. I also think that he would not want you to do this alone.”
