by Mia Ashlinn
I’m only going to meet him. Then I’ll go, and we’ll never see each other again. Yeah, that’s what I’ll do.
Deke opened his mouth to speak. But for the second time tonight, he was interrupted by a man. At least this time, he recognized the voice. Declan Stanton.
Gnashing his teeth together, Deke turned to see his housemate. The conceited ass was grinning from ear to ear. He was smugger than the cat that ate the canary. Deke really didn’t like that look.
Uncertain about the turn of events, Deke did something he’d never done before. He stepped back, away from the people around him. Something told him that he’d been set up and that he should run. But his stupid pride wouldn’t let him. Instead, he thrust away every emotion, shuttering his face in the process.
“Ah,” Declan breathed. “I see you’ve met…my younger brother.”
Deke swore. Adam. His housemate Declan had been attempting to play matchmaker between him and his Irish twin brother since the start of their sophomore year. If it weren’t for the fact that Deke was at Yale while Adam was at Columbia, he’d probably have been tricked into a blind date before now. But until this moment, he’d managed to foil every attempt Declan had made.
As Deke glanced around the group of strangers as well as Declan, he knew they’d all tricked him. The strangers’ guilty faces and his friend’s smug one gave them all away. When Deke noticed the rest of his housemates approaching, he knew they’d helped, too. Bastards.
Adam put his hand out to Deke, obviously expecting him to shake it. “Nice to meet you,” he murmured. The velvet intonation of his voice sent a shiver down Deke’s spine, shaking him to the very core. He’d never responded to a man, not like this one. He was hard, pound-nails-into-concrete hard. And he wanted nothing more than to grab Adam and kiss him. He wanted to run his hands through Adam’s brown hair and cup the back of his head then kiss him until neither of them could breathe. Then he wanted to kiss him again.
Holy fuck. What’s wrong with me? Deke didn’t kiss—anyone. He didn’t like the intimacy. He didn’t want anyone that close to him. Not Adam though. Deke ached to have him in every way he could get him. Shit.
Scowling at the man he wanted to steal away and fuck the hell out of, Deke kept his hands to himself. “Not likewise,” he replied coldly.
Deke expected Adam to be pissed that he was being so rude. But no, Adam did the unexpected. He laughed. “Tough shit. You’re stuck with me.” A sly smile lit up his face. “Seems to me we’ve been deserted.”
Deke looked around them. They were alone. While he’d been acting like some lovesick moron, every person near them had abandoned ship. Well, isn’t this fucking great? I should get the hell out of here. But he didn’t make a move to leave.
Crossing his arms defensively, Deke frowned. “Seems to me that we should make nice for”—he paused to glance at his watch—“about thirty seconds. Then we’ll go on our way and no one will be the wiser.”
Again, Adam laughed. “I never saw you as a coward.”
Deke bristled at the accusation in Adam’s tone. “I’m no coward. I’m just not interested.” And now I’m a liar. “You’re not my type.”
“That’s funny. You’re not mine, either.”
“Then why are we still standing here?”
“Because you’re a challenge,” Adam said. “And there’s nothing I like better than a challenge.”
For some reason, Adam’s words bothered Deke. He didn’t like being some game to be won, especially not with Adam. He wanted Adam to want him for him. Where the fuck did that come from? I don’t give a damn about anyone.
“Don’t waste your time,” Deke replied. “I don’t have a heart.”
Adam snorted. “Everyone has a heart. They just need the right person to help them find it.”
Stubbornly, Deke shook his head. “I’m a lost cause when it comes to love.”
Adam’s smile disappeared instantly, and a glower replaced it. “No one’s a lost cause.” He growled. “Not even you.”
Deke shrugged. “Whatever. I have to go.”
“Feel free. I’m not stopping you.”
Yet again, Adam’s words disturbed Deke. He didn’t seem bothered that Deke was rejecting him or that Deke was going to walk away. However, Deke didn’t feel the same way. Stupidly, he felt rejected and lonely. I’m being ridiculous. I don’t need him…or anyone else.
Clearing his throat, Deke offered Adam his hand. “Have a nice evening,” he said. “It was…” Trailing off, he knew he should say something nice. It was the polite thing to do. But unlike earlier with BR, he couldn’t force himself to be polite. The words just froze in his throat. “Interesting.”
Adam clasped Deke’s hand, shaking it sociably. The moment their skin touched, electricity shot up Deke’s arm and being social fled his mind. He wanted this man, and he wanted him—now.
For a second, Deke actually considered leaving the party with Adam. He thought about taking him somewhere else so they could be alone. He imagined what it would be like to fuck this man, to spill himself inside of him. He pictured Adam’s naked body beneath his, the feel of Adam’s wide chest and his taut stomach skin-to-skin with his hard cock rubbing against his. Oh, God. Stop it.
“Interesting, indeed,” Adam replied.
Puzzled, Deke glanced at Adam. The other man’s heavy-lidded blue eyes were no longer looking at his face. He’d dropped them lower—much, much lower—to Deke’s clothing-covered cock. Unabashedly ogling Deke’s crotch, a sensual smile lifted Adam’s too-kissable lips. “Among other things,” he added.
Shaking his head partially in irritation and partially in begrudging amusement, Deke muttered his good-byes to Adam and spun on his heel. He stalked off without another word. But as he passed BR, he heard Adam call out, “Hey Deke, I think I’ll help you find that missing heart of yours. But you might want to prepare yourself because I never give up.”
Pretending not to hear Adam, Deke kept walking.
Chapter 3
Present day…
Exhaling his frustration, Deke returned to the present. He blinked a couple of times until his eyes came into focus. Once the parking lot he was standing in reappeared in his vision, he cursed himself viciously. He had to get a grip. Otherwise, he wouldn’t be able to turn his back on Sarah and Adam in the backseat of his Mercedes and walk away.
He sucked in a breath of fresh air then opened his mouth to say something through the back windshield. But he quickly snapped his jaw shut and tore his eyes away from the two people who mattered most to him. Despite his body’s protests, he forced himself to leave. He didn’t help Sarah out of his car like he should. He knew Adam would take care of it. And he didn’t tell them where he was going. They would figure out he was going to her apartment on their own.
He just left them behind.
As he strode through the quiet parking lot, Deke knew he was being a giant prick, but he couldn’t seem to help himself. He assured himself that it was better this way. But deep down, he wasn’t convinced. In his heart, he wondered if he was right or if he was making a huge mistake, a mistake that he was only going to compound when he left today and didn’t come back.
No. I decided to stay away from her, and I’m going to do it—even if it kills me.
When Sarah had told him she was moving to Kinky, Deke had come to a conclusion—he had to let her go. It was time. She was strong enough to survive without his interferences. No more taking care of her or watching her every move. She had to lead her life without him in it.
It wasn’t as though he would be in much contact with Sarah anyway. She wasn’t allowed inside the play areas of The Edge without a membership, and he had no plans to provide her with one. Even outside of those areas in the club, she was restricted in where she could go and with whom she could associate. So there was no reason for her to visit him. God knew he wasn’t going to seek her out.
Besides, his self-denial wouldn’t be that different from the past year. He hadn’t spent much
time with her since she’d moved into the club. Every time she came around, he put her at arm’s length, practically running away like some insipid weakling.
But not anymore. Now he didn’t have to see her or talk to her. He didn’t have to smell her or touch her. He didn’t even have to breathe the same air as her. A sharp arrow of agonizing pain shot through Deke’s chest. But he refused to acknowledge it.
Shutting down every thought in his mind, Deke pretended he didn’t give a damn about anything or anyone. He acted as though the air breezing by him gently didn’t have a nip to it. He ignored the whispered words Adam and Sarah exchanged after they got out of the luxury sedan and shut the door behind them. He merely made his way through the parking lot, focusing on the monotonous sound of his black wingtips against the pavement.
When that didn’t help, he lengthened his gait and hustled inside the apartment building. As soon as he crossed the threshold, Deke headed straight for the stairs. He wasn’t in the mood to take an elevator ride with Adam and Sarah, not even when it was only a couple of floors.
Luckily, it didn’t take him two minutes to jog up the steps. And before long, he was in front of her apartment. B1. God, he already hated B1.
Deke stuck the key into the lock and unlocked the door then turned the knob. Before he could go inside, a woman’s loud voice echoed through the hallway. “Hey Deke,” Ansley Lockhart hollered, clearly not caring that everyone on the second floor could more than likely hear her. “Where’s the fire?”
Caught unaware, Deke dropped his hand to his side and hauled himself around. Scowling at the honey-blonde bombshell, he snapped, “I’m in a hurry to get back to The Edge.” Arching one eyebrow, he tacked on, “Aren’t you supposed to be working today?”
The always-irreverent Ansley snorted. “Some of us actually have lives outside of The Edge.” She grinned. “Go figure.”
Deke considered responding acerbically to Ansley, but the ding of the elevator kept him from saying a word. As Adam and Sarah emerged from the lift, Deke jerked the keys out of the lock and grabbed the doorknob again. He pushed open the door then ducked inside, silently hoping Ansley would vanish as quickly as she’d come.
Predictably, she didn’t. She followed him inside then said with a hint of amusement underlying in her tone, “Ah, I see. You’re avoiding—”
“Don’t,” Deke growled.
She chuckled. “Wasn’t going to.”
Bull. He knew better. “Sure you weren’t,” Deke replied, his voice openly exhibiting his disbelief, as he trudged through Sarah’s chaotic living room. Dodging more cardboard boxes than he could count, he cursed every one that crossed his path. Then he cursed the woman tagging along behind him, following him around like some irritating puppy.
“So, bossman,” Ansley whispered while Deke and Sarah let themselves into the apartment through the door he’d left half open. “Are you going to put yourself out of your misery? Or are you going to be a bonehead and stick to this abstinence bullshit?”
Deke’s annoyance with Ansley morphed into anger at her insolent line of questioning, and he shook his head, refusing to answer her. He didn’t want to know how she knew he’d been celibate for nearly a month and a half now. It wasn’t like he wore a damn sign around his neck or anything.
“Are you going to leave, Ansley? Or am I going to have to kick you out?” he asked, suffusing his every word with an arctic air. “Because right now I have no problem with either.”
Ansley giggled. “I’m sure you don’t. You wouldn’t want me to call you on your bullshit.”
Deke frowned but still didn’t rise to her bait. He remained silent and aloof as he wound his way around the boxes to Sarah’s dilapidated couch. Dropping down, he threw an arm across the back of the sofa with a grunt. “See you later, Ansley.”
“Dream on, bossman,” she retorted. “I think I’ll hang around and watch the sparks fly. I have to live vicariously, you know. It’s not like Hale or Wyatt are ever going to do anything fun with me.”
Deke rolled his eyes. “I wish they would. Maybe then, you’ll keep your nose out of everything.”
“Not hardly. You’ll have to kill me first.”
“Why is Deke killing you this time?” Adam inquired drolly as he approached with Sarah tucked into his side. “Did you give Wyatt another prostate exam when he didn’t need it?”
Sarah choked, her face flaming red, and Deke couldn’t stop the smile that spread across his face. She was cute, too cute for a man like him. “You did that? Really?” Sarah asked, clearly astonished by Ansley’s audacity.
Ansley grinned proudly. “Yes, I did.”
“She tried that on me once,” Adam told Sarah. “But I didn’t fall for it.”
Sarah shook her head, sending the strands of her rich caramel-colored hair from side to side. “You’re too smart for that, huh?”
Deke had to clench his hands into fists to fight off the urge to toy with Sarah’s silky hair as the tips brushed along her graceful neck. He had to draw his hands even tighter when a couple of stray tendrils fell forward and framed her pretty face, making his fingers itch to feel the warmth her rosy cheeks would radiate.
Staring at Deke’s hands, Adam smirked. “Much too smart.”
Ansley snorted. “He’s not that smart. Wyatt warned him ahead of time.”
“Oh, really?” Sarah asked innocently but there was laughter in her gray eyes.
Ansley nodded. “Really. If Adam were half as smart as he thinks he is, he would have jumped your bones already. And if Deke were half as smart as his IQ says he is, he would have joined in the festivities.”
Sarah’s eyes grew round, the delicate blush staining her cheeks darkening to crimson. Deke almost felt sorry for her. But he was too riled up by Ansley’s high-handedness. “Time to go, Ansley,” he ordered. “You need to get to work before you’re late. From what I hear, the bosses are hard-asses about tardiness.”
Ansley winked at Sarah saucily. “My work here’s done.”
Sarah bit her bottom lip, clearly trying to hold back a laugh.
But Adam didn’t. He guffawed. “Yes it is,” he murmured. “Couldn’t have done it better myself.”
Blowing a kiss to Sarah, Ansley headed for the nearest exit. As she swung open the door, she peered over her shoulder. “Oh, yes you could have, Adam. I have faith in you.” A second later, Ansley was gone, closing the door behind her with a barely audible click.
Frowning, Deke considered Ansley’s too-obvious comment. She, like everyone else, thought Adam could convince him to change his mind about claiming Sarah. After all, he had fought for Deke and won seventeen years ago. But they couldn’t be more wrong.
The situation was completely different this time. Deke had too much to lose. There was too much at stake. So one way or another, Deke had to win the game Adam was dying to play. If he didn’t, he could very well lose his heart and destroy them all.
* * * *
Well. Sarah didn’t know what to say as she remained plastered to Adam’s side. She knew she should speak up, but her tongue had glued itself to the roof of her mouth and her jaw was clenched to the point of pain.
Unable to do anything to help the sudden tension in her living room, Sarah looked up at Adam with pleading eyes. He smiled at her and nodded. “Why don’t we get some stuff unpacked?”
“Sounds like a plan,” Deke muttered. Getting to his feet abruptly, he removed his suit jacket and folded the fabric in half before laying it on the arm of her couch. “Why don’t you two start in the kitchen? I’ll work in here.” He swiftly turned his back on them, openly dismissing both her and Adam.
Sarah frowned, not liking that he was dumping her with his partner rather than spending a few minutes alone with her. Heaven forbid. “Why don’t you and I start in the kitchen, Deke?” she asked, her voice telling him that she wasn’t giving him an option.
Adam stiffened beside her, but she didn’t back down. “I’ll go work on the bedroom,” he said. “You’re going to n
eed somewhere to sleep, sweet pea.”
Sarah nodded her agreement then smiled up at him gratefully. “Yes I will.”
Deke mumbled something unintelligible. However, he didn’t deny her. “Let’s go in the kitchen and get this over with,” he grumbled. “Then I need to get going. I have important things to do.”
“So do I,” she shot back.
Deke glowered but came forward and clasped her elbow with a firm yet gentle hand, presumably to guide her into the kitchen. But as soon as his warm flesh touched her, she froze. So did he.
Deke wasn’t affectionate, not with her or Adam. Not with anyone. Sarah had accepted that sad fact years ago. Even as children, she couldn’t remember him being openly demonstrative with her, Shane, or Landon. In fact, the only time she could recall that he touched her tenderly as a child was in a worn photo she carried in her wallet.
When she was six, her foster mother had snapped a picture of an eighteen-year-old Deke cuddling her close as she cried hysterically. Shane and Landon had been kneeling in front of her, trying to calm her with whatever they were whispering. It hadn’t worked. She’d been too devastated that all three of them were going away to college and leaving her alone. As expected, the boys had left the next day, and she’d spent months trying to get over what she saw as their abandonment. But now, she kept the photo on her always as a reminder of Deke’s softer side, the one she loved but rarely saw, the one he was showing her now.
Peering up at Deke, she nibbled on her bottom lip to keep a smile at bay. When she noticed his disconcerted expression, she gave up and grinned. “Come on,” she whispered, giving him an out. This time. “We have work to do.”
Sarah didn’t acknowledge the husky tone in her voice. Neither did he. Instead, she allowed him to lead her toward the kitchen without another word. Much to her delight, he didn’t release her, choosing to keep her pressed intimately to his side as they walked.
The feel of his powerful body beside hers heated her blood, warming her own body to a simmer. But even that didn’t drive her nearly as crazy as the smell of his cologne. Raw masculinity flowed off him and danced around her. She felt enveloped by the addictive scent, and she inhaled deeply to garner another whiff of his earthy essence. Wow. I’m in Heaven.
