by Mason Sabre
There were deer here, Aaron had told Danny as they drove up. “I'm gonna catch the biggest one,” Danny had beamed, and Aaron had laughed at him.
“It’ll probably catch you. You leave the big ones to the real wolves.”
“Do you hear that, Phoenix?” Danny had said, deflecting his brother’s insult to where it would sting. Phoenix had stared straight ahead, trying not to let a stupid boy’s words hurt him.
There were eleven cars parked in the lot. All of them were different families, and all of them were Society members—Cade had told him that morning. That was how it worked. Every member of the pack had to be Society or they became strays. They all had to pay—it was how it was run. Ten percent of the family’s income for membership. The Society wouldn’t exist without it. It seemed that everything was just business, even in the world of the Others.
These people were all Trevor’s wolves, though one day they would be Aaron’s. Trevor was their alpha and they listened to him. Phoenix didn’t need any magical sense to notice that they all looked at him as if they would rather kill him than have him standing with them. But he did as Stephen had said and kept himself out of the way, standing back against a tree so as not to bother them.
Many of them had already removed their clothing, and they stood around in groups talking, naked, like it was the most natural thing in the world. Phoenix kept his eyes averted, embarrassed.
Despite not yet having completed its ascension, the moon was already big and bright. Phoenix had never seen it so close before. It was as if he could reach out and hold it in the palm of his hand. “I’m going to run with the little half-breed,” Trevor announced, startling Phoenix as he strode over and gave him a solid slap on his back. Phoenix staggered forward from the force of the blow.
One of the men frowned at Trevor. “You're alpha. You don’t run at the back.”
“Tonight I do,” Trevor said.
“It isn’t right.”
Trevor raised an eyebrow, and the man’s shoulders slumped a little in submission. “I am alpha, and that means I run where I like. Do you understand?”
The man nodded along with and others that were gathered there.
“If I choose to run at the back, then I run at the back, and it doesn’t get questioned. Tonight, Aaron will run up front, and I will run with Phoenix.” Trevor wrapped his arm around Phoenix’s shoulder and grasped his arm hard enough that Phoenix winced. Everyone laughed, but the message was more than clear. You're not going to get away.
It was like the moon suddenly moved, because all at once, people started to rub at their skin and throw their heads back, sighing in pleasure from it. Everyone except Phoenix, that was. Trevor’s hand tightened on him and Phoenix rubbed at his skin to copy the rest and look normal, even though he didn’t feel whatever it was they were feeling.
“That’s it, boy, feel the call,” Trevor said to him. “Take it right in.”
Those who still wore clothes, took them off, and then they all spread out. Eyes changed and the air seemed to crack and heat up. One of the younger Others dropped to the ground and began to growl, and another followed suit immediately after. Very soon, they were all doing the same. Phoenix did the only thing he thought he should—he dropped down, too, not wanting to stand out. One of the young wolves laughed. “Look at him, he can't even do it right. He still has his clothes on.”
Phoenix looked away in shame. He didn’t want to take all of his clothes off in front of these people, but Trevor glared down at him. He lifted a shaky hand to the top button of his shirt and popped it open. He was so much scrawnier than they all were. Even the young children had more meat on them than he did—his body was built differently to theirs. Emily’s drinks were helping, definition beginning in his arms and legs and lines forming across his stomach, but still his ribs were clearly visible.
The others paid him no mind after a moment. They’d had their moment to laugh at him and then gone back to their own things again. It was easy for them to ignore him, and Phoenix was grateful for that. He liked to be ignored. He just wished that Trevor would do the same and find that he wasn’t worth his time. Once Phoenix had taken his clothes off, he closed his eyes as if that would help make him invisible, the shyness still there. The moon was higher now, lighting up the sky from where they stood. Phoenix knelt down in the dirt, Trevor still standing over him. This was the worst moment to screw it all up, the moment when Trevor could really decide that he wasn’t worth being a wolf or being part of his pack. He struggled to close his eyes and search for his wolf, but his wolf knew what to do and answered his call happily.
Shifting was such an odd experience. It walked along a fine line between pleasure and pain. Just one more hurt, one push too far, and perhaps the pain would be just too much. But it always turned out to feel like a refreshing snap of his bones—a way to cleanse the soul perhaps. He invited his wolf in willingly. He relished every bone-popping moment as all the parts in his body realigned and became his wolf.
When his shift was done, Phoenix stretched his front paws out, lowered his head and stretched his tail out behind him. He pushed out with his head as far as he could manage and let himself revel in the feel of it. The sounds around him had grown louder, more distinct than before.
The whole pack had shifted now, howling from deep within the confines of the trees. Their paws pounded against the earth and Phoenix got so lost in the moment that he suddenly realised he had forgotten all about Trevor. He turned abruptly, but he was gone. The scent of him was there, deep and musky, much like Cade’s but maybe stronger, deeper and older. He padded along the edge of the woods, careful to stay just on the edge. Would they welcome him in there? He didn’t dare to enter. Maybe they wouldn’t want him in their territory. He remembered reading that wolves were very territorial. He slunk into the darkness around the edges and vowed to keep himself there and away from them all.
The scents were thick in the air, so many different smells that it was difficult to distinguish them. Cade told him that it was possible to, but maybe that was because Cade was pure but Phoenix wasn’t. The sound of hooves against the hard earth made Phoenix spin around and he caught sight of his first deer. It raced towards him, but then bucked when it caught sight of him. She didn’t stand a chance, though. Three wolves leapt from the shadows and took her down, a huge, black wolf biting the back of her neck and pinning her down. A fourth wolf ran out of the darkness, but not at the deer—it came straight for Phoenix. It swiped a paw in front of him and snarled. Get lost. The message was clear.
Phoenix backed away a couple of steps, and the wolf returned to where the deer now lay dead, its lifeless eyes staring out at Phoenix, its face contorted in fear and desperation, the last moments of its life etched on its expression. The coppery scent of blood filled the air but instead of feeling pity, what Phoenix felt was hunger. His stomach rumbled, demanding to be fed, but the wolves already feeding on the deer in front of him told him that that was not going to happen.
The tree line went all the way around what seemed to be a circle. Phoenix followed it, slowly at first, but then he built his pace up until he was running. He had got only so far when Trevor suddenly stepped out of the shadows and blocked his way. Phoenix dug his unsteady paws into the ground to stop himself from crashing right into him. Trevor hadn't shifted—he was still man, and Phoenix didn’t understand why or how. He thought that all wolves had to answer the call. Maybe being alpha made him different.
“Even for a half-breed, you're a magnificent wolf,” Trevor said, reaching down and stroking his hand through Phoenix’s fur. Phoenix tensed. “It is a gift that should never be given to Humans. Your type don’t ever deserve it.” Trevor twisted his fingers in Phoenix’s fur, just enough to feel it. Instantly, he curled his lip as if to snarl, but stopped himself. Trevor had seen the small sign of mutiny, though. He laughed. “Feisty. I like that.” He squatted down in front of him. “You know you can never really be one of us, don’t you? My son has the heart of his mother, so
it isn’t his fault, but he sees the good in everyone. Even Humans. He forgets what you are. Not even Human children are worth anything. The sourness is bred into them from the start. It germinates with you all in the womb. Do you know that Cade will lose his place in the pack if this is allowed to continue? I fear for him. He is too soft and he will become a stray … and I can't do anything to stop it.” He stroked his fingers through his fur once more. “Do you know what a stray is Phoenix?”
Phoenix could only stare up at Trevor.
“Strays are what we call those who chose not to be with us, or those who have been exiled. They don’t tend to live very long, though. They don’t have the rights to hunt like we do, so they have to hunt on Human lands, and that is forbidden. The Humans catch them and kill them, or worse, enslave them and force them to work against Others and so they are killed either way. I worry that my son won’t survive very long out there, Phoenix. He isn’t used to it.”
Phoenix thought to his own experience. Those boys had attacked him for no good reason. Humans would make Cade suffer, too, if he tried to live in their world. Cade was strong and he would fight, but when he had an army of Humans against him, how long would he last?
“Cade will never let you go,” Trevor continued. “He is too soft. He would find you and bring you home each time, tend to your wounds and make you promise not to leave. So, you see, we have a bit of a problem here. The longer you stay in the pack, the more chance Cade has of being cast out. I am alpha, but there is only so much I can do before they challenge me.”
He sighed and cupped Phoenix’s face in his hands, brushing the fur back on his head. “I know you can hear me and understand. I know you love Cade as much as I do and will help me to save him?”
Phoenix growled and gave a nod in response. Trevor smiled.
“That makes me very happy. It means so much to me.” He leaned in close. “I am not supposed to tell you this—Cade didn’t want me to say—but we have found your maker. Do you know that if you beat him, then you can stay, and Cade won’t be pushed out?”
Phoenix’s heart thumped wildly in his chest. Could it be that simple?
“You’re meant to kill him.”
Phoenix wasn’t sure he had heard right. Kill?
As if reading his mind, Trevor continued, “But we could fix this together. You just beat him, and I’ll finish it off for you. No one will ever need to know. It can be our secret,” he whispered. “I don’t want to lose my son, and I am sure you don’t want to lose Cade?”
No, he didn’t want to lose Cade. He didn’t want all these bad things to happen.
“You don’t have to answer me now,” Trevor said. “Think about it. You will see Cade in the morning ... see what the cage did. He’s locked in a cage made of silver, and he may not survive it. Lots of wolves have died in there. I hope he is strong enough.” He wiped a tear away from his eye. “I’ll put my number in your pocket, and you can call me tomorrow and tell me what you want. We can fix this, Phoenix—we can make it all right.” His expression grew worried. “But you can't ever tell Cade, Phoenix, because I am not really allowed to help you with your maker. But I want Cade to be okay, and I think you do, too.”
Trevor stood then, ruffling Phoenix’s fur one last time before turning and leaving him standing there with so much indecision filling his mind he wasn’t sure he could put it all into any order.
One thing was for certain, though. He’d caused all of this. It was up to him to fix it.
Chapter Thirty-Two
As they rounded the corner to Cade’s house, Phoenix could see that the lights were on upstairs. He said nothing to Trevor as he drove him up to the house, but fear swelled in his gut. There shouldn’t be any lights on at all. Cade was locked in a cage and no one was supposed to be home. As they drew closer, Phoenix spotted Cade’s car parked in the driveway. It was at a wrong angle, but it was definitely his car.
A mixture of excitement and fear rushed over him. “Cade is home,” he murmured breathlessly, forgetting that it was Trevor with him.
Trevor peered into the darkness. “It’s early.”
“He was supposed to be back in the morning,” Phoenix whispered.
Trevor pulled the car to a stop just behind Cade’s awkwardly parked car. “Maybe he couldn’t hack it in the cage. I told you that boy is soft. Malcolm probably let him go early.”
“He can do that?”
“He’s head of the Council—he can do what he wants.” Phoenix was barely able to contain his excitement and relief that Cade was back earlier than he’d expected. He stared at the house with anticipation. “You just go about your things,” Trevor said. “Cade will sleep it off.” He looked him straight in the eye, voice lowering. “And remember what I said, Phoenix.”
How could he forget? Trevor’s words swam around in his mind like a song on repeat that he couldn’t get rid of.
Phoenix climbed out of the car and closed the door without another word to Trevor. Phoenix tried hard not to squirm under the weight of the other man’s gaze as his eyes stayed fixed firmly on him. Phoenix couldn’t bear the shame of everything he had caused, and Trevor knew it. But Cade’s father had the answers and could help him, and Phoenix was not going to pass up the opportunity. He gave the man a curt nod and then turned and walked along the side of the house to the back.
The house was eerily silent when Phoenix stepped inside, everything on the ground floor in complete darkness. Phoenix locked the back door and hung the key up on the rack as Cade had taught him to do. He crept up the stairs, not wanting to disturb Cade in any way. Pausing outside his bedroom door, Phoenix was unsure whether he should stay away and just let him sleep it off like Trevor had said. He strained his ears for any sound from within, but everything was deadly quiet. The lamp cast eerie shadows in the corners of the hallway, making the hairs on the back of his neck prickle with unease. Pushing the door open quietly, he whispered, “Cade?”
Cade lay on the bed, arms out at either side of him, illuminated ominously by the two lamps in his room. Phoenix took a tentative step into the room, wanting so badly to wake him and hear him say he was all right. He needed to let him sleep, though—let him recover from his ordeal. Shame and guilt burnt deeply inside him as he stared at Cade’s unmoving form. This was all his fault and he knew it. Everyone got hurt because of the things he did, and he didn’t know how to stop it. Hate ripped through him as he caught his reflection in the free standing mirror in the corner of the room. He tore his gaze away, despising the monster that stood there staring back out at him.
With each step he took closer, he could better see the extent of Cade’s injuries. The room smelt like burnt flesh, sweat and blood. Cade wore no shoes but still had his jeans on, his shirt rumpled and splayed open on either side of him. Deep, red lines ran down the curve of his throat, smeared blood making his throat appear like it had been some part of a horror set. Cade’s chest had been gouged several times and looking at his dirty, bloodied fingernails, Phoenix knew that Cade had done this to himself—tried to claw his skin away. It was the state of his palms, however, that made Phoenix gasp in shock. The skin had been burnt raw, the burns so bad that Phoenix doubted Human hands would ever have been able to recover from this.
“I’m sorry,” he whispered, stifling the sobs that threatened to erupt. Unable to stand it any longer, he dashed from the room and to the bathroom. Flinging the door shut, he cowered down onto the floor next to the sink and put his head in his hands. He couldn’t push the images of Cade from his mind. He let his sobs go, deep and inconsolable as the weight of everything he had caused these last couple of months came crashing down around him. Already he had caused so much pain that his father had cast him out, and now he was just causing more. Sorrow and pain just seemed to follow him around until someone died from it—and Cade nearly had.
He let all his grief pour out, sadness at what he had done to his mother, at what he had cost his family, at the Human boy he had killed … and now this. Cade would be right
to throw him out in the street just like his father had.
Minutes later, head throbbing and throat sore, Phoenix wiped his eyes and made himself stand up. He had to fix this. Leaning on the counter, he stared into the mirror at the red-rimmed eyes and pale complexion. “Snap out of it,” he scolded himself. “Snap the hell out of it and go fix this.” He washed his face and then dried it on the small hand towel that hung by the side. He pulled Trevor’s card out of his pocket and stared at it. He set his jaw in a firm line of determination, knowing what he had to do. “But Cade first,” he muttered to himself.
Stuffing the card back into his pocket, he went down to the kitchen and pulled out a small bowl, filled it with warm water and then filled another with water mixed with one of Emily’s concoctions. He placed both on a tray and got some clean rags Cade kept, dumping one in each bowl. When he got back upstairs, he pushed the tray onto the bedside table and tried his damned hardest to focus on the task of cleaning the injuries instead of wasting time ruminating on what he had caused. This was not the time to wallow in self-pity.
The bed dipped under Phoenix’s weight as he knelt next to Cade. Cade seemed to rouse slightly, groaning, but his eyes stayed closed. He licked his dry lips, his head falling to the side as he passed out once again.
With trembling hands, Phoenix took the cloth from one of the bowls and squeezed out some of the excess water. He squeezed the rest lightly on Cade’s throat, blood and water running down the side of his neck. Phoenix caught it with another cloth and wiped it away. He was careful not to touch Cade’s wounds with any of the rough cloths. Cade’s throat was bruised under the blood but most of the other wounds were just scratches. Phoenix soaked the other cloth into Emily’s emulsion and dripped some onto Cade’s skin. Cade flinched as the first one dropped, his eyes fluttering. Phoenix held his breath, anticipating Cade opening his eyes. When they remained closed, he continued his cleansing, working down Cade’s body. He cleaned the wounds on his chest the same way, leaving his hands to last.
