by Rhian Cahill
“Oh.”
“I’ll drive. Add the small amount of wine you’ve had to your emotional roller coaster, and you’re in no shape to get behind the wheel.” Alyssa headed toward the back of the house. “I’ll just tell Penny I’m going out for a bit.”
“Okay. Thank you.” Mazey’s mind spun. That woman had taken her child. How does someone kidnap their own child? And why had she come to Rylan? There was so much she didn’t know. So much she couldn’t understand.
But if Alyssa was right, and Rylan wasn’t married, the boy not his, she owed him an apology. Something she seemed to do a lot of when it came to their relationship.
It had taken one thing for her to jump to conclusions. True, they were valid conclusions with the information given to her, but she’d also had her knowledge of Rylan to point to the possibility of the woman’s words being a lie.
She’d been far too quick to paint him with the same brush as Stuart. If she couldn’t move past what Stuart had done, then she wouldn’t allow the connection between her and Rylan to get any stronger than it already had. And she wasn’t thinking about protecting herself. She owed it to him to come into their relationship with trust, and she hadn’t.
First, she needed to see him.
Needed to hear from him what was going on. Only when this situation with his ex-wife was sorted out could she think about the future, about them.
One thing was certain.
She was having Rylan’s baby, and even if they weren’t together, they would be connected by their child for life.
36
Rylan hung up the phone and stared at the little boy asleep on his bed. His father was about two hours away, and Rylan had no idea what he was going to do when Maddox woke up.
He’d never met the kid. Didn’t know his birthday or what had happened to send his mother off the rails.
Jake had revealed more of the situation, and Grant Malone had added even more.
From what he understood, Renee had started using cocaine, and Jake had been given sole custody when she’d left six-month-old Maddox alone in her apartment for eighteen hours.
He thought she’d left him to be with Jake. She’d all but said that was where she was going the day she’d asked for a divorce and packed her bags.
Rylan expected to get the full story when Jake arrived to take his son home. Grant had pulled some strings so that Maddox didn’t go into the system, so he could stay here for the few hours it took Jake to drive up from Monterey.
He wanted more than anything to go to Mazey, but even with the bad blood between him and Jake, he couldn’t let his ex-friend’s son go to a stranger. Not that Maddox knew who Rylan was. The little guy would probably freak out when he woke, although the paramedic who’d checked him over said he should sleep a couple of hours yet.
One more strike against Renee.
She’d drugged her own child!
Rylan shook his head and moved the pillows surrounding Maddox’s chubby little body closer. He was in the middle of the california king mattress, and it should have given Rylan some comfort that he wouldn’t roll off the edge except he couldn’t seem to take his eyes off the boy. Couldn’t bring himself to leave the room even though Jake had assured him his son would be okay like this.
Scrubbing a hand down his face, Rylan decided he had to trust his ex-friend knew what he was talking about, and it was safe to leave the room.
He could do with a drink, but there was no way he was consuming any alcohol while in charge of Maddox. Besides, he would need all his wits when he finally talked to Mazey. He’d have coffee instead. Brew it extra strong to wake himself up. The day had been exhausting. He never slept well on base even when they didn’t get any calls, so he was running on roughly six hours of sleep.
And the kids from earlier today—god, had that only been today?—had taken more energy than he expected. He hadn’t eaten either, and whatever was in the pot plugged in downstairs on his kitchen counter smelled delicious. Maybe he’d grab some food and coffee and then work out how best to smooth things over with Mazey.
Taking one more glance at the boy, Rylan headed out of his room, leaving the door open so he could hear if Maddox woke up.
He was halfway down the stairs when the front door opened.
Every muscle pulled taut, ready to fight, when Mazey stepped into the house. “Mazey.”
She looked up, her eyes wide and red-rimmed, and he wanted to kick himself for causing her tears. “Hey.” She didn’t smile, and Rylan wondered if he’d ever be lucky enough to draw her smiles again.
“Hey.”
“Um, I still have the key.” She held her hand out, his key in her palm.
He didn’t want to take it back, and he didn’t think she’d accept it if he told her to keep it, so he didn’t say anything.
“Can I come in?”
“Of course.” He jogged down the rest of the stairs and stopped in front of her. “You’re always welcome.”
She nodded, looked behind him. “So, I, um, think we should talk, yeah?”
“I was just going to make coffee. I don’t have decaf, but I have some of that ginger tea we bought.” Should he have reminded her of that? He had no idea what to say that wouldn’t have her running for the hills. He’d had plenty of time to think while the world had turned to shit around him.
He’d never loved Renee. He’d married her in some noble bid to do the right thing because she was pregnant. Except she hadn’t been and because they hadn’t lived together, hadn’t even been together in the six weeks between that false-positive result and the day she’d told him she wasn’t pregnant, he hadn’t seen the point in getting an annulment or divorce. Their marriage hadn’t, in any way, changed his life.
“Tea would be nice. Thanks.”
“Okay.” Rylan couldn’t take his eyes off her. She was two feet away, and he wanted to grab her and hold her close. Needed to. After today, he needed to hold her for hours. He didn’t see that happening any time soon. What he needed was a distraction. Something to keep his hands occupied. “I take it you made whatever is in that pot.”
“Yes.”
“Will you share some with me? Please.”
“Sure.” She pressed a hand to her stomach when it growled hungrily. “I haven’t eaten since this morning,” she explained.
“Follow me.” He lost the battle with his control and grabbed her hand. “Let’s eat and talk.”
She didn’t pull her hand from his, and he smiled before leading her back to the kitchen. He directed her to a stool at the island counter and went around to put some coffee on and the kettle for her tea.
“What do I serve this with?” He looked through the clear lid to the bubbling meal inside. “It’s a stew, right? So, bowls. I’ve got a loaf of bread, but it’s the pre-sliced kind.”
“Bowls, yes. I’ll pass on the bread.”
Rylan busied himself, putting their food together, and getting their drinks made. Neither of them spoke, and while he had been worried it would be uncomfortable, it wasn’t. Even at odds, he felt relaxed with Mazey. More centered than at any other time in his life. And that included when he soared thousands of feet in the air doing what he loved.
He set everything on the counter and took the seat beside her. “So. You met Renee.”
“Yes.”
“And she told you she was my wife. Which isn’t a lie except she no longer holds that title and hasn’t for over a year. We were married for about three years by the time the divorce papers were stamped. It wasn’t a love match. It was a little stick with a two stripes match.”
“Oh.”
“Yeah. And that turned out to be a false-positive or something, but by then, we were married, and I was in Afghanistan, and neither of us saw any point in dissolving the marriage. I spent over eighty percent of my time overseas, and if I hadn’t been shot down and needed rehab for my injuries, I’d probably still be in the army. It was when I decided to retire that Renee informed me she wanted a divorce and that th
e baby she was carrying wasn’t mine.”
“Oh, Ry.” Mazey put her hand on his arm. “I’m so sorry.”
“It’s funny, I wanted kids, wanted a family, and yet I’m glad the baby wasn’t mine.” His gaze connected with hers. “I didn’t love her. I never loved her. I doubt we would have stayed together if things had been different.”
“I—”
He pressed a finger against her lips. “Don’t say you’re sorry. I’m not. If things had been different, I wouldn’t be here. With you.”
“We’re here because I’m pregnant,” she said against his skin.
“No, we’re not. You might not believe that one hundred percent yet, but you will. I’ll make sure of it.” He motioned to her bowl. “Now eat. You and the baby need nourishment.”
She gave him a small half-smile, and he gave her a full one back.
It might not be one of the smiles he was after from her, but she was here. They were talking, and he’d be damned if he let her doubts, or her fears of the past repeating itself, get in the way of what they could have together. He decided to get the rest of the story out now. To tell her everything he should have a month ago before Maddox woke up or Jake arrived.
“So, the baby turned out to be my best friend’s.” He kept talking over her gasp. “Jake and I had been friends since preschool. Even joined the army together. He got out early, and he actually introduced me to Renee. Anyway, the day she asked for a divorce is the last time I spoke to or saw either of them. I didn’t even know she’d had the baby.”
He took a sip of coffee to wet his dry throat. This next part bothered him most, and it was something he’d had no part in.
“Apparently, and I don’t know all the details, Renee started using cocaine. She’d left Maddox, that’s the boy you saw today, alone in her apartment. I had no idea she hadn’t moved in with Jake after leaving me. It’s what she told me she was doing. Anyway, after leaving the baby alone for a day, a neighbor called the police. They called Jake, and he called a lawyer. He has full custody, and Renee is only allowed supervised visits. It was on one of those visits three weeks ago that she took Maddox and disappeared.”
“Three weeks? And they only just showed up here? Where have they been all this time?”
He shrugged. “No idea. Best guess from some of the things she was yelling when the police took her in, she was here in town. Watching me.”
“Oh, that’s comforting.”
“I know. She drugged him, Maz. Maddox. He’s upstairs asleep. The paramedic said he’ll sleep a few more hours yet, and I’m really hoping his father gets here before he wakes up.”
“He’s upstairs?” Her gaze rose to the ceiling. “Is he okay up there on his own?”
“I’ve got him in the middle of my bed with pillows all around him. Jake said that would work.”
“Should we go up there and wait? In case he wakes up?”
“I don’t know. I’m out of my element here, Maz. I have to admit, he scares the shit out of me, and we’re going to have our own little guy in eight months.”
Mazey laughed. “I’m pretty sure ours won’t come out a toddler.”
“True. Still.”
“Come on. We’ll take our dinner upstairs.” She hopped off her stool and picked up her bowl and mug. “You can tell me about Jake while we’re up there.”
“Jake?”
“Yeah, I want to hear all about the guy you’ve been friends with your whole life.”
Could he talk about Jake? He’d written Jake off the second Renee had said the baby was his. He’d believed her, and obviously, it was true. But now that he looked back, should he have given his childhood friend a chance to explain?
He freely admitted he didn’t—hadn’t—loved Renee, if Jake had then who was he to get in the way of that? How much had his friend gone through in the last few years without Rylan beside him like they’d been their whole lives?
Rylan wasn’t sure what would happen when Jake got here, but one thing he did know was that he needed to listen to what his old friend had to say.
37
Mazey’s gaze bounced between the two men in front of her. “Wow.”
Jake chuckled. “Yeah, we’ve gotten that reaction all our lives.”
“You’re not related? At all?” Standing side by side, they looked like twins. No wonder she’d believed Rylan could be Maddox’s father. His real father held such a close resemblance to Rylan, it was scary. If she didn’t know Rylan so well, she’d get them confused.
“Not related.” Rylan slung his arm around her shoulders. “Maz, this is Jake. Jacob Conners, Mazey Novak.”
“Wait. You even have the same last name, but you’re not related?”
“Crazy, right?” Rylan shook his head. “Definitely not related, but the shared last name meant we were next to each other all the time in school.”
“You could pass for twins.”
“We might have done that once or twice,” Rylan said with a smile.
“Nice to meet you. Sorry it’s under these circumstances,” Jake said, his smile dimming.
“Same.” She held out her hand. “Could we offer you some dinner?”
Jake shook her hand, saying, “Yeah, please, I haven’t slept or eaten right in weeks.”
The reminder of what had happened put frowns on all their faces. “Why don’t I take you up to check on Maddox while Maz gets you a bowl of stew?” Ry offered.
The sigh of relief that left Jake dropped his shoulders a good three inches. “That would be fantastic. Thanks.”
“This way.”
Mazey watched Rylan lead Jake upstairs. She didn’t have many friends, and none of them had followed her out of childhood like the two men heading up to check on the baby. It was a shame they’d drifted apart. Or blown apart. Mazey couldn’t help wondering if their similarities had prompted Rylan’s ex-wife to do what she did.
Rylan hadn’t told her more than the basics of his marriage and the ending of it. The possibility of Rylan and Jake patching up their friendship now that Renee was out of the picture seemed small, but she’d seen the way they looked at each other just now. And she’d heard the fondness in Rylan’s voice when he had talked about Jake earlier.
He missed his friend. Could they bridge the gap between them? Forgive the betrayal? And who had betrayed who? She was starting to think Rylan’s ex-wife had played both men for fools.
Making her way to the kitchen to dish up the promised meal, she thought about ways she could help them make peace with the past and maybe re-establish their friendship.
“Hey, Maddox is stirring.” Rylan came up behind her. “I’ll take that up to Jake. Can you grab him a bottle of water to go with it?”
“Sure. Do you want something?”
“No. I’m good.” He dropped a kiss on her forehead, the move so startling it took her a moment to register his next words. “Thank you.”
Warmth filled her, the skin where his lips touched tingled. “Ah, for what?”
“Being here. After everything.”
She took a deep breath. “I owe you an apology for today.”
He held up a hand. “No, you don’t. I know why you took off. I know what Renee said hurt you. And I’m sorry, sorrier than you can imagine that you went through that. But you didn’t have to come back, Maz. I was coming for you. The second Jake left after collecting his son, I was coming for you.”
“I don’t know—”
“You don’t have to know anything right now. Just stay with me while Jake’s here. I’m asking a lot, and after the part I played in today, I shouldn’t ask, but I need you here, need you to get through this.” He swallowed. “I want to know why he slept with my wife.”
She could see the anguish in his gaze, knew it was more about the betrayal of their friendship than the stealing of his wife. He’d told her he’d never loved his ex, and Mazey believed him. Despite her fears, her own past, she believed Rylan when he said he didn’t love Renee. Nodding, she murmured, “Okay. Shou
ld I put on another pot of coffee?”
“Nah. Grab the water and join us upstairs.”
“Okay, I’ll be right up.” Mazey watched him disappear. There had been no hesitation in her answer. No fear. Yes, she’d been hurt by him today but not because he’d lied or cheated. He’d kept part of his past from her, and she couldn’t fault him for that because when she broke it all down, when she thought about their relationship, they weren’t even at the stage of revealing their pasts.
They’d done everything back to front, inside out and upside down. They were having a baby but had only agreed to be friends who occasionally had sex before that discovery. It was only a week since then, a week in which she’d accepted his request to give them a try, to be a couple. And just this morning they’d informed their boss they were dating.
So much had happened in the span of one day.
One thing had become painfully obvious in the light of today’s drama.
She was in love with Rylan.
She had no idea when it happened. How it happened. She’d been protecting herself as best she could after the disaster of her engagement, and yet he’d found his way into her heart.
And honesty made her acknowledge he’d gotten far deeper than Stuart ever had.
The fact she wanted to dive into this emotion headfirst had her being cautious. They needed to take things slow. Needed to be sure the foundation of their relationship was solid. And balanced.
For obvious reasons, she’d never had that with Stuart. She wanted it with Rylan.
It didn’t need to be equal, just balanced. And right now, he needed her to be strong, to stand beside him while he navigated this tentative reunion with Jake.
After grabbing three water bottles from the fridge, she headed for the stairs.
She had no idea whether they could make it work, whether they would be a couple when the baby came, but she was willing to try. Wanted to try.
Being a family with Rylan could be everything she’d ever dreamed of, and she wasn’t going to let the damage that Stuart’s betrayal had done to her heart and her confidence ruin her chance at making that dream a reality.
