“I know, baby. I’m sorry.”
She sucked in a breath. “I know it’s hard to understand, but I’ve worked hard for this freedom, the freedom to live on my own. I was barely making enough money to cover everything, but I was doing it. Finally. For the first time in my twenty-seven years. Living on my own, answering to no one, never having to please anyone but me.”
He held her tighter. “I understand.” He did. He hated that it was even possible to understand where she was coming from, but he did.
“Do you though?” she accused softly.
“Well, I can’t completely step in your shoes, of course, but I do know what it’s like to want to be independent and barely scraping by. Granted, I always had my parents I could have fallen back on at any time so that knowledge changes the mindset. But the thing is I didn’t want to have to go to them for help. Me. A grown man. When I got home from the Army, I had to start my life over. I had lost everything that mattered to me. My job. My career choice. My wife. My housing. I even moved back in with my parents for a few months so I could get my feet under me.”
She grabbed his hand and threaded her fingers with his, squeezing. “Things must have been tight while you went back to school.”
“Yep. The Army paid for it, but it was still hard. I got my degree and then Tank offered me a job. It wasn’t until then that I could afford to buy a home and take a deep cleansing breath. For the four years it took me to get my degree, I lived in a one-bedroom apartment near campus, bussed tables on weekends, and sparingly used my savings.”
Heather flinched and after a moment’s hesitation spun all the way around in his arms so she was facing him. She wrapped herself around him, her arm over his chest, her head in the crook of his shoulder. “I’m sorry. I forget I don’t own a monopoly on having a hard life. I didn’t mean to sound all woe is me like some entitled bitch who thinks no one else has ever had a problem in life.”
He stroked her hair and ran his hand up and down her biceps. It felt so good to have her nestled against him, her bare leg reaching up over his. “I didn’t mean to make you feel bad, Heather. I just wanted you to know that I can at least marginally empathize. It’s not the same at all because I always had a soft spot where I could have landed safely. At no point did I ever fear I might be homeless.”
“Still… Please accept my pity-party apology. And thank you for letting me stay here. I promise not to hide the coasters again.”
He chuckled. She was amazing. How could she joke right now? “Baby, they are still hidden. I never found them the first time.”
“Oh that’s a bummer,” she said sarcastically. “And you know what else is a bummer?”
“What?” He grinned, knowing whatever she said was going to be at least as comical.
“That you found my thong in your couch before you were meant to. Now I don’t even have one pair of panties. It would’ve been cool if I could’ve reached down right now and plucked them from between the cushions.”
He chuckled, letting his hand slide down to pat her butt, covered only in his shirt. “Mmm. I’m not sure how bad I feel about this problem.”
She giggled, the sound warming his heart.
“Maybe my sister won’t think to bring panties.”
Heather tipped her head back and held his gaze, smiling. “Seriously. Thank you. I don’t know what I would have done if I hadn’t known you well enough to call you in the middle of the night and yank you out of bed.”
“I feel honored. It was my pleasure. I’m glad you felt at least close enough to me to not think twice.”
“And you’re missing work for me.”
“It’s Friday. They’ll live. That gives us three days to sort things out before I have to get back to the office.”
Her eyes widened. “Oh, shit. Your parents’ anniversary party is tomorrow night.”
“Yep. That’s like a lifetime away. Let’s not add that to the immediate concerns list.”
“Okay.”
A knock sounded at the front door, and Neil suddenly wished he hadn’t asked Amy to come so quickly. He was going to lose this connection with Heather and he wasn’t sure how long it would take her to nestle so closely with him again.
“That’ll be my sister.” He reluctantly dragged himself over the top of Heather and left her tucked in on the couch so he could answer the door.
“Hey,” Amy whispered as she stepped inside, arms full of bags. “Oh,” she said as she spotted Heather sitting up on the sofa. “I hope I didn’t wake you. I didn’t want to ring the doorbell.”
Heather shook her head. “No. I couldn’t sleep. My brain is racing.”
“I bet. I’m so sorry about your apartment.” She dropped the dozen bags on the floor and took a seat in the armchair. “You must be exhausted.”
Heather sighed. “I don’t think it’s all fully hit me yet. Thank you so much for picking me up some things. That’s so kind.”
“Of course. It was no problem.” She grinned. “If I were in your shoes, I wouldn’t want to be stuck sitting around wearing nothing but my brother’s T-shirt for one minute longer than necessary.”
Heather smiled as she pulled the blanket around her.
Neil playfully swatted the back of his sister’s head as he came around to sit next to Heather. “Somehow I don’t think you wearing my shirt is the same thing.”
“True.” Amy shuddered dramatically. She batted her eyes playfully at Neil. “And I’ll never understand why any woman would want to wear some guy’s gross shirt, but apparently I’m just not wired that way because all the straight women I know seem to think it’s quite romantic.”
Heather’s eyes narrowed slightly and she cocked her head just the smallest bit to one side.
Luckily, Amy spoke again because Neil didn’t like to tell Amy’s business. He always let her decide when and how to out herself to someone new. He’d assumed she’d chosen not to last week when she came over to get the fertilizer because Heather hadn’t said a word.
“Men do nothing for me,” she announced without flinching, meeting Heather’s gaze. “If my brother hasn’t told you yet, I’m married to a woman.”
“Ah. No, he didn’t tell me anything.” She glanced at him, eyes a bit wider.
Neil lifted his shoulders. He met Heather’s gaze but spoke to his sister mostly. “I haven’t exactly spent hours and hours talking about my sister with Heather. I always let you tell people what you want them to know when you’re ready.”
He probably should keep his hands to himself, but he couldn’t resist the temptation to tuck a lock of Heather’s damp hair behind her ear. He knew it was a fairly cavemanesque gesture, but dammit, he wanted Amy to know how much Heather meant to him, and he didn’t want Heather to think he was willing to let his sister believe the two of them were simply friends.
Heather surprised him when she turned back to Amy and said, “What’s your wife’s name? Will I meet her tomorrow night?”
Neil held his breath, mostly to avoid revealing just how affected he was by her words. They hit right in the solar plexus. On top of the rest of red flags Neil should have been aware of when it came to Lacey, she’d been a bit homophobic. It had put a strain on Neil’s relationship with his sister and infuriated him.
He stared at Heather’s profile, not moving an inch, knowing without a doubt in his mind that he would always remember this as the precise moment in time when he knew he was falling in love with her.
He could hardly hear Amy’s response. “Renee. And yes, she’ll be there.”
“I’m going to need to find a dress before then. I’m not sure I had anything I would have wanted to wear anyway, but I assume one of Neil’s T-shirts would be inappropriate.”
Amy laughed.
Neil finally drew in a breath as quietly as possible. He was grinning at Heather like a loon. He didn’t care. She was his. It might take him a while to chip away at her walls, but he would do whatever it took to get inside, and he would never let her go once he won her ov
er.
At no moment in the last six years had he ever thought he might fall for another woman, let himself be vulnerable like this again, trust someone with his heart. But here he was anyway, and there was no way to avoid it. His heart belonged to the gorgeous woman next to him whom he thought looked like an angel in his T-shirt.
“Neil?”
Amy’s voice shook him out of his headspace, and he turned his gaze toward her. “Sorry.”
Heather turned her gaze to Neil also. “Amy was offering to take me shopping later today or in the morning to help me find a dress.”
Something in Neil shifted. This awkward distance between him and Heather had to go, at least in front of Amy. He knew he wasn’t fooling her anyway. He wrapped his arm around Heather, drew her closer, and kissed her temple. “Sounds good. Pick something red, and replace the sexy thong, will you?”
She flushed and rolled her eyes.
Amy laughed as she leaned back and put her feet on the edge of the coffee table. “So, you two are just friends, huh?”
Chapter 9
“I really appreciate you taking me shopping,” Heather told Amy two hours later as Amy drove toward her favorite boutique.
Neil had cooked them both breakfast while Amy and Heather got to know each other.
They’d gone through the shopping bags, and Heather had been beyond grateful to find two pairs of jeans in two different sizes, which worked out great because one of them fit perfectly, and they could return the other.
Amy had also come through with several cute tops and a pair of gold flip-flops, saying she’d figured at the very least they would fit well enough until Heather could make it to a shoe store. The flip-flops were also perfect, and Heather loved them.
Amy had fantastic taste in panties, which would have been difficult to mess up. In the end, all Heather was missing was a bra, and they’d agreed to hit a lingerie store first. It wasn’t as if Heather was so well-endowed that eyebrows would raise between now and then.
The only glitch in the morning had been a head-to-head discussion about money, one that Heather had forced Neil to take to the bedroom so they wouldn’t have to argue in front of his sister.
The truth was Heather didn’t have much extra cash lying around to cover a shopping trip of the magnitude she was going to need in the short run. She would get an insurance check eventually, but obviously not today. She could use a credit card, but she wouldn’t be able to pay the balance.
On top of that, Neil had already paid his sister for the pile of items Amy had brought over.
Heather had paced his bedroom, rubbing her forehead.
Neil had politely leaned against the edge of the mattress, fingers gripping the bed at his sides.
“You can’t buy things for me, Neil.”
He’d drawn in a slow breath. “Heather, I know you value your independence, but you’re in a bind here, baby. If it bothers you, keep all the receipts and we’ll settle up later.”
She’d stopped pacing to stare at him from a few feet away. “Promise me.”
He’d nodded.
She’d sighed. “I’m extremely uncomfortable with this plan.”
“I know.”
She’d finally decided she’d needed to accept his help and offered him a slight smile. “Are we having our first fight?”
He’d chuckled. “Nope. We’re having a calm discussion about what needs to be done in the short term.”
“So, you’re silently humoring me until I see reason.”
“Basically.”
Heather had finally relented, mostly by turning around and leaving him standing there with that grin of victory on his face.
Shaking herself back to the present as Amy parked the car, Heather climbed out and followed her shopping partner in crime into the lingerie store. “Please tell me you didn’t also take this morning off work to help me,” Heather said as they stepped inside.
“Nope. I own an art studio with my wife. We don’t open until eleven.”
“An art studio? How fun. Do you paint?”
Amy laughed. “God no. I don’t even have an eye for it. I have a business degree. I run the backend. My wife is the artist. The front of the store is a gallery, and she holds classes in the back.”
Heather smiled. “I’d love to see it one day.”
Amy picked up a bright red bra and panty set. “Maybe pick a day when you’re not wearing this,” she teased as she handed it to Heather. “I believe it was my brother’s primary request.”
Heather flushed. It felt weird talking to his sister about her sex life, or pretending it existed. Nevertheless, she took the lingerie from Amy and tucked it under her arm. “Maybe we should start with something more practical so I can leave here with a bit more support.”
Heather was trying not to hyperventilate three hours later after Amy dropped her back off at Neil’s house. She’d spread out her purchases on the bed in the guest room, trying to assess the situation.
Neil came up behind her and set his hands on her shoulders. “Looks like you’ll be okay for a few days.”
Heather sighed as she turned to face him. “This is insane. I’ve never in my life bought that many items in one shopping trip. I’m shaking.”
“You’ve never had everything you own burn in a fire either,” he pointed out.
She chewed on her bottom lip. “True.”
“It can’t be helped. Either you’re going to have to accept some assistance, or stay in my house for weeks on end wearing one of my T-shirts until you get your insurance check.”
She chuckled. “Good point.”
“I’m not opposed to either option.” He leaned around her to look over her purchases. “I don’t see any sexy red lingerie.”
She shoved at his chest. “What would be the fun in that? If I let you see every single item, it would ruin the mystery.”
He lifted his brows. “So there is sexy red lingerie around here in one of these bags?”
“Maybe. Maybe not.”
“And a dress for tomorrow night?”
“Hanging on the back of the door.”
Heather slid away from him and sat on the edge of the bed. “Your sister thinks we’re serious. Are you sure about taking me to your parents’ party tomorrow? Feels like we’re putting the cart before the horse.”
Neil closed the distance, cupped her face, and tipped her head back. “I’ve never been more serious, Heather.”
“Everyone is going to assume we’re sleeping together.”
He smiled. “It’s none of anyone else’s business what we’re doing behind closed doors. Who cares what they think?” He stroked her cheeks with his thumbs. “Speaking of which…”
“What?” She narrowed her gaze.
“Do you mind if we stay over at my parents’ house tomorrow night? You can say no if you want and I just won’t drink. But it’s an hour drive, and it might be late, and—”
“It’s fine.” She wasn’t at all sure it was fine. Her nerves were frayed. But she didn’t want Neil to feel like he couldn’t enjoy his parents’ party because he needed to stay completely sober. Hell, since she wouldn’t be going to work at all anytime soon, she would welcome a drink herself. Maybe if she slammed back a glass of champagne right off the bat, she could find a way to relax and enjoy herself.
Neil lowered his lips to hers, giving her the slightest kiss. A tease.
It worked. She wanted more, and she fisted the front of his shirt to haul him closer. She was playing with fire. Fitting perhaps.
Her world was a crumbled pile of debris. She felt reckless and desperate as she parted her mouth to encourage him to deepen the kiss.
He obliged, but he kept his hands on her face the entire time, eventually breaking the kiss to stare into her eyes.
Heather flopped back onto the mattress. “What are we doing, Neil?”
He shoved her clothes aside and sat next to her, twisted to face her, a hand on her thigh. “Dating?”
“I’m staying in your hom
e. Indefinitely. It feels more like we’re playing house. We barely know each other.”
“That’s not true. I’ve told you more about me than I’ve ever told a single other person, man or woman, including my own parents and my sister. I suspect you’ve shared more with me than anyone else too. After a few weeks of talking, we know each other better than anyone else knows us.”
She stared up at him, trying to calm her racing heart. Half of her wanted to say fuck it and yank him on top of her, make out until they couldn’t breathe, strip, and fill the emptiness with the bulge she rarely missed at the front of his jeans.
The world would not stop spinning if she slept with him. But that would complicate things. It would also encourage him to get even more possessive than he already was.
She needed air, so she wiggled free of him and slid off the edge of the bed, heading for the back door. There was more oxygen on the back porch, right?
Luckily, he let her go and didn’t follow her or try to stop her.
His backyard was inviting and soothing. She’d sat back there under the extended roof, curled up in one of his wicker chairs, several times while he’d been out of town.
The temperature was perfect. It never got too hot under the overhang. It was peaceful and quiet. An oasis. He had a gardener who came once a week, so the lawn was in excellent shape, the bushes trimmed. Two older trees provided shade, their branches blowing slightly in the breeze so that rays of sunlight filtering through the gaps danced across the lawn. Mesmerizing.
About an hour later, Neil joined her, lowering onto the outdoor sofa, saying nothing.
“It’s so peaceful out here,” she told him. “I didn’t realize until I stayed here that I’ve never had a pleasant backyard to escape to.”
“I thought you grew up in a house?”
She smirked. “It was a house. Sure. There was technically a backyard. No grass because it was overgrown with weeds. No patio. My father had a BBQ pit that he sometimes used, and a few of those folding lawn chairs everyone had. Remember those? The ones with the aluminum frame and the colorful woven webbing that frayed and eventually fell apart?”
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