by Heather Long
“Screaming orgasm contest doesn’t count,” Jake said with a grin. “That’s friendly competition.”
And I was blushing again, but Jake only laughed at me.
Still, no competing. Wow.
They were all laughing, and I plowed on, heading back to the subject at hand. “So just four rules?”
The laughter faded, and Ian sighed.
“Nope,” Archie picked up the thread. “Rule number five—no one else, just us.”
A shiver went through me at the possessive look in his eyes. That rule didn’t surprise me. I licked my lips and nodded.
“Rule number six,” Ian volunteered. “Don’t hurt Frankie.”
That got a sharp nod from all of them.
“We fucked that one up some,” Jake admitted, and Coop sighed.
“But we’re working on it,” Archie insisted. “I like to think we’ve gotten better.”
“So do I,” I agreed, and some of the tension went out of their shoulders.
“Rule number seven was mind your own business. We only talk about what we want to talk about. We don’t butt in to each other’s relationships with you.” Ian tilted his head back to look at me again. “Unless we see someone messing up like I did. The guys nailed me for that, and rightly so.”
“And we worked it out,” Coop clarified. “Because we’re still friends, and friends have to communicate.”
“Okay, Dr. Phil,” Archie teased. “Dial it back. She gets it. Rule number eight was no fighting.”
“We did a shitastic job with that one,” Jake declared wryly. “But I stand by slugging Bubba. He deserved it.”
“So did you,” Ian retorted drily. “Not that I’m disagreeing with the fact that I deserved it.”
They shared one of those nods that meant they were in accord, and it took everything I had not to roll my eyes.
“That just leaves rule number nine, “ I murmured. “I think, unless you added any more.”
“Rule number nine?” I had all of their attention, except for Archie, who just laughed softly.
“No, I think we’re at nine, and I think that one should stand. Naked worrying is not allowed.”
Immediate assent came from all the guys on that one, and at least the blushing had calmed enough. Naked worrying had nothing on screaming orgasm contest.
“So, Baby Girl,” Jake said. “Any of those rules you want to toss out?”
“I don’t think so, though I’m confused why Sunday nights with you got a rule, but all the other date nights didn’t.”
“‘Cause Jake is a territorial ass,” Ian told me. “And he wanted to make damn sure he had time with you locked in no matter what else was going on.”
“No lie,” Jake admitted. “We can amend that one, within reason. To maybe…all four of us get an evening with you to ourselves, at least once a week?”
“Schedules and school and work permitting,” Coop suggested. “Some weeks are going to be tougher than others.”
“Fair,” Archie mused. “But we’re all staying here, so we can just rotate on those nights so your families get off your asses about how much time you’re over here.”
His family didn’t give him grief, and I frowned.
“No one is irritated with us,” Coop argued. “Mom wants Frankie to come over for dinner though.”
“Ditto,” Jake and Ian said in unison.
“Okay, that is an issue for another day.” I needed to think about this some.
“Done,” Archie said. “But just so you know, Jeremy would love to have you over, and so would Grandpa the next time he’s in town.”
I liked his grandfather. Really, I liked all of their parents, except for mine and Archie’s directly, so this wasn’t really a problem.
“Did you want to add any more?” Ian asked, shifting to look at me. “You did say you wanted to make rules.”
“I do have one… It’s kind of one I asked for before, but I think we need to make it a real rule.”
I had all of their attention.
“Name it,” Ian said.
“Rule number ten…” I labeled it because we had a list, and maybe we needed to print it out. I could do that later, too. “We talk to each other when something is wrong or we have questions or we’re worried.” I held Ian’s gaze the whole time. “Even if it’s hard to talk about. We agree that we don’t make assumptions or decisions for each other without consulting the other person.” That went for them as well as for me.
He didn’t hesitate. “Done.”
The other three followed suit.
We had to shift gears at that point, because homework wasn’t going to do itself. They took turns helping me with mine if I needed anything handwritten out, otherwise, they set me up with my laptop and I henpecked away left-handed.
The rules had been easy. Splitting up tasks for homework, then for getting food together, and finally for packing up Maddy’s room—I found one box of items I planned to keep and it wasn’t much, but they were some old things of mine—the guys kept it easy and light.
They’d moved all the furniture to one side so it was all ready to be hauled out, and Coop had even run the vacuum. The room smelled better, though it still reminded me of Maddy, but it would probably be better after it aired out. Coop and Ian had cleaned out the bathroom together so it sparkled.
“Rule number eleven,” Archie suggested as he set the last box in place. “We make big decisions by vote. Democratically.”
“Maybe,” I said. “But you’re not going to get the football-sized bed by going around me with the guys to vote.”
He grinned slyly. “Don’t think they’ll side with you?”
“No, I think you guys have a fantasy about me in a huge bed.” And considering I had a couple of my own, I could say it with some authority.
“Oh, I think you’re underestimating us,” Coop said, arms folded where he leaned against the wall. His eyes were scorching as he raked them over me, and I had no doubt what he was thinking about because that memory wasn’t far from my mind either. “We have a lot of fantasies.”
“All about you,” Jake agreed. “Not all necessarily needing a bed.”
Yep. That did it. The blush I’d managed to fend off for the conversation won, and my face caught on fire. “I hate you all,” I muttered as they laughed at me.
How Does That Make You Feel?
“I feel like I should know the answer to that,” I told Erin. It was only my second appointment, but it was easier this week. Or maybe I was just distracted. A lifetime had happened since our last appointment.
“Well, if you feel like you should know the answer, what do you think it is?” Her quiet question prodded me, and I lifted my shoulders with a wince. The bruises and stiffness only seemed to worsen each day. The fact that Jake had found some liniment to rub into my hip and shoulder the night before had helped, but not enough.
Now they wanted me to ice it as well as stink to high heaven with the various bio-freezes. Could be worse, I supposed. It was that, or they wanted me to take the pain meds.
I was over those, even if the pain grew teeth clenching. Jake and Coop would argue with me. Archie had just stopped and put the pills in my hand and stared until I took them. I had a feeling after Coop and Jake witnessing that earlier this morning, I was going to get more of the same.
“A part of me is happy that they’re gone from school. That their expulsions mean they are excised from my life. But…” I didn’t know how to phrase it without sounding like a total idiot. “I kind of miss Cheryl. I miss…who I thought she was?” Was that even a thing? “It’s like with Maddy. A part of me does miss her, even if I would be happy if I never spoke to her again. At the same time, it makes my stomach hurt and it’s so fucking…sorry…”
“Cuss away, don’t edit yourself.” Erin’s calm acceptance made it easy to push forward.
“I miss her. I miss what a mom is supposed to be. What I kind of thought we had, or maybe I just lied to myself about. I can’t tell the guys t
hat. They really hate her. And I don’t.”
“You don’t what?”
“I don’t hate her. She just makes me sad. She makes me really, really sad.”
“And you don’t think you should feel sad?”
“I should hate her. I should hate her for always choosing everything that isn’t me.”
“There is no should, there is how you feel. Your feelings are your feelings.”
“Okay fine, I get Maddy. But why Cheryl? Why… We weren’t close but…” I sighed. “I thought she liked me. I can’t in a million years picture doing to the people around me what she did—even the ones I don’t like.”
“I’m going to say this again, and I need you to spend some time with these words and to make yourself comfortable with the thought and the emotion. You are allowed, entitled even, to feel how you feel. There’s no right or wrong. Your emotions are yours. Acknowledging them, it’s the first step toward understanding them.”
“That sounds really great,” I said with a sigh. “But I feel a lot of things.”
“And that’s okay, too.”
I nodded, but it was more an acknowledgement than anything else.
“We’re getting close to the end of our session, and we’ve talked about a lot of disappointments today. Can you tell me one good thing that’s happened since we last spoke? Something that made you feel good?”
“Archie said he loved me,” I admitted and let myself smile. The warmth that evoked helped to fill in some the empty and aching places those other disappointments left in their wake. “Ian and I are in a good place again. We made up.”
“How does that make you feel?”
I laughed, even as I blinked back some tears. “You just asked me what made me feel good.”
“And now I’m asking how those two things make you feel?”
I sucked on the inside of my lip. A blush warmed my face. “I feel wanted, valued…seen.” Wry smile in place, I lifted my shoulders. I was almost afraid to admit it because I didn’t want to jinx anything.
“I feel good.”
Chapter Five
It’s the Little Things
Jake and I cut out of school early on Friday. I, because I had an actual doctor’s appointment, and Jake, because he was my ride. The guys had actually rock paper scissor’d it the day before, even though Jake said it would be easier if he did it since we had seventh together anyway.
Some arguments I just refused to wade in on. Particularly when PMS seemed intent on making me miserable and pissy. Just easier to eat my ice cream and let them figure it out on their own.
Jake won in a run-off with Coop that lasted eight rounds with the two of them choosing the same damn item every time, until Jake switched it up and rocked Coop’s scissors.
All hilarity aside, I was both dreading and looking forward to the doctor’s appointment. The follow-up from the emergency room visit was a pain in the ass, but I liked Dr. Robbins. She’d been my doctor forever. It was the one thing that I didn’t mind going to see her about all this because from the age of eight onward, she’d been my doc.
Mostly because Maddy had gotten irked with the pediatrician who argued with her, and the next thing I knew, no more peds for me. Just Doc Robbins.
As we pulled into the parking lot, I reminded Jake, “You can just sit in the car or the waiting room, but you’re not coming back with me.”
He chuckled. “I’ll be good.”
“Uh huh, and you’ll be good out here. It’ll go faster if you’re not there.” And besides, I had thing to discuss with her that I did not want to discuss with Jake. Or any of them, at least not right now. I gave him a quick kiss. “If I need you, I have my phone. I’ll call, and you can play Super Jake.”
With a gentle snort, he caught my nape and pulled me back for a far more thorough kiss. “I’ll hold you to that. You still feeling a little off?”
“Shark week is imminent. That means chocolate.”
“Got it,” he said, then winked. “I’ll make sure I let the guys know they better come bearing gifts if they want to hang out this weekend.”
I grinned. “I’m not that bad.”
“Nope,” he said. “You’re perfect. Even when you want to be a monster.” He gave me a perfectly innocent smile, even if his pale blue eyes danced with mirthful teasing.
I smacked his shoulder, but I was still laughing as I got out of the SUV.
Inside, I had to wait fifteen minutes before they took me back. I texted him to let him know I’d been called, and he told me to take my time.
Doc Robbins didn’t make me wait long. She hustled in the room as soon as the nurse was done with my vitals. I’d already turned my temporary emancipation paperwork over at the front desk, so all these decisions would be mine. Not that Maddy had been to a doctor’s appointment with me since I got a driver’s permit.
Wearing a hot pink dress that looked stunning against her dark skin and a paler cream colored sweater over it, Doctor Robbins gave me a smile as she came in. “Well, it’s about time you came to see me. I keep getting reports from you seeing other doctors.”
“Sorry, I seem to be spending a lot of time at the E.R. lately, and then they have me seeing an orthopedic doctor for this.” I motioned to the cast on my arm.
“Hmm-hmm.” She studied me. “You doing okay? Doing follow-ups?”
“I am, and I’m seeing a psychologist, trying to get my head straight.”
“Good.” She settled in a chair. “Tell me what I can do for you today.”
I took a deep breath. “I need some advice,” I told her on the exhale. “About birth control.” Then I laid out what I wanted and why. We discussed all the options, from the IUD to the implant to shots. The side effects weren’t a fun list to go over, but she had pamphlets on each of the different contraceptive methods.
The great thing about Doctor Robbins, she talked about all of this like it was perfectly normal. The best time to change methods was around my period, and since shark week was about here, this was the best time.
“Okay, let’s get you in a gown, and I want to do a pelvic and go over your other injuries, then we’ll get you set up after we check the insurance coverage.” That was actually a valid concern for me. There was a real chance Maddy would kick me off her policy, considering how pissed she was at the moment, and since re-enrollment was this month, I wanted to get this done while I still had it.
No way I was asking Archie for the money to cover this.
It took about forty-five minutes total, including the blood work, the pelvic, and the quick check of my shoulder and hip. Both sets of bruises looked colorful, but they were doing better. I had a Band-Aid on my upper arm for the implant.
“Seven days,” she told me, having shocked the hell out of me that I could go ahead and do it today. “Seven days before it’s fully effective, so this is good. No more pills. Just remember, that implant isn’t going to prevent STDs, so if you have unprotected sex, make sure you know they’re clean.”
Yeah.
That was another fun set of conversations.
One big step at a time.
“Thanks, Doctor Robbins.” The best part of all this though was it might make the cramps more tolerable. They weren’t the worst thing ever, but I was already sore before we did the pelvic, and I was getting more uncomfortable as time passed.
Jake had only texted me once after I got back to the exam room. Outside, I found him taking a nap in his car. The wind had definitely turned brisk, and there were storm clouds rolling in. He had his seat back and his feet up, and there was the hum of music from inside. I stood there like a creeper for a minute and just smiled at him.
Then I fished out my phone and snapped a picture. He looked adorable, especially with the way his hair fell over one eye. He’d been letting it grow longer and longer. I liked it. Sooner or later, he’d cut it. The bruises on his face were as mottled as the ones on my shoulder and hip, but at least the swelling had gone down for him and Ian both.
He sa
t up as soon as I opened the door, going from asleep and adorable to rumpled and adorable as he swept a look over me from head to toe. “All good?”
“Yep,” I said as I climbed in. He reached past me without a word and snagged the seatbelt. As soon as he clicked it into place, he kissed me gently and I sighed against his lips. “What are you going to do when I get my wrist back and you guys don’t have to do everything for me?”
“Enjoy the hell out of driving you nuts by doing it anyway,” Jake said with a grin.
Rolling my eyes, I touched my fingers to his cheek and then sighed as he settled back in his seat. “Can I ask you a kind of awkward and potentially invasive question?”
Eyebrows raised, he said, “You had definitely better ask whatever it is now.”
“Have you ever been tested to make sure you’re clean?” I’d never really asked before. I kind of assumed, and Jake was pretty clear about always wearing a condom. I liked to assume the other guys had been as careful, but…
“Specifically?” He shook his head. “Do you want me to be? Or better phrased, do you need me to be?”
I glanced down a beat, this was kind of embarrassing. I’d given him a blowjob—more than once now. So it wasn’t like I hadn’t been up close and personal. “I’d like to be one hundred percent sure. Or as sure as we can. I got blood work done and it’s part of the panel she’s going to do so I can say I’m clean.”
“We know you’re clean, Baby Girl,” Jake stated firmly. Even though the engine was running, he made no move to pull out of the parking spot. All of his attention was focused on me. “I had a physical right before school started. Bloodwork and everything. I’m clean. I’d wager Bubba can say the same, he had to get the same physical I did.”
Made sense. Football.
“Thank you.”
“Hey,” he said, threading his fingers through mine, and I leaned toward him to rest my head against his shoulder. “No thanks required. Though…can I ask what brought this up? You’re okay, right? All the guys have…”
