by Dalia Wright
When he next opened his eyes, the doctor he recalled hazily was nowhere nearby and instead he was confronted with a most unexpected sight. It was the face of a beautiful, angelic face peering down at him anxiously. Convinced he had died he murmured,
“Is this heaven? Am I in heaven now?” Wondering even as he asked the question whether he deserved heaven. The vision in front of him didn’t respond but at the sound of his voice she exhaled in relief.
“You’re an angel aren’t you.” James murmured.
The angel with the beautiful eyes bit back a smile and shook her head.
The very next moment he felt a sharp stab of pain as a needle was pierced through the skin on his stomach. With a jolt he realized if he could feel such pain he was very much alive indeed which meant the angel tending to him must also be made of flesh and blood. He tried to raise his arm to touch the mirage in front of him but he was too weak and only managed to lift it halfway before his arm fell back against his side.
“You’re very much alive.” The angel said briskly without looking up from her task, “I’m not an angel, just a nurse and I don’t think this place could be called heaven by any stretch of the imagination.” The last bit was said under her breath but James heard it and he smiled.
“Where am I?” He asked.
“In a field hospital. Now don’t speak and for heaven’s sake don’t
try to move again, you’ll only hurt yourself more. You have a nasty wound on your stomach. You developed an infection and the previous stitches had to be undone to clean the wound again. So I need to stitch you back up again. I’m sorry it’s so painful.” She added softly.
Her voice was soothing and melodious, she spoke in perfect English but James could tell from her accent she was French.
“You’re French.” He said, forgetting what she had said about not speaking.
She nodded briefly.
“Am I in the enemy camp?”
“If by enemy you mean a French camp, then yes, you’re in a French camp. Now please stop talking, I’m going to burn the wound to close it and it’s going to hurt a lot.”
He was about to ask her where she had learned to speak such perfect English when another sharp stab of pain on his stomach, followed by the stench of burnt flesh rendered him unconscious.
He swam in and out of consciousness for the next week as he battled the infection from his wound. A high fever rendered him delirious and incoherent. It was clear he was suffering from nightmares because he would often cry out in his sleep issuing orders, talking about London and every once in a while he called out the name Ava.
Delphine wondered if Ava was his wife.
It had been made clear to Delphine that Major James Sutton was an important prisoner and taking good care of him was a top priority. He would be used as ransom and they needed him healthy and alive so Delphine was tasked almost exclusively to his care. And she didn’t mind a whit. From the moment she had laid eyes on him she had been inexplicably drawn to him. He was a good looking man there was no doubt about it, but it was the expression in his eyes when he first saw her that drew her to him. He had kind eyes. So she stayed at his side every waking moment, watching over him as carefully as if he were a baby. Taking brief breaks to sleep and eat. Whenever he cried out in his sleep she soothed him by caressing his face and whispering soft comforting words. One of the male nurses helped with the bodily functions but it was Delphine was gave him sponge baths and shaved and dressed him. At first she felt embarrassed handling a member of the opposite sex in such an intimate fashion but two days in the midst of sick men cured her of any shame.
One night the relentless fever finally broke and the deathly pallor faded from his face. Delphine watched him breathing evenly and she sighed in relief before fetching the doctor. He inspected Major James and announced the worst was over and declared he was on the mend. Hearing the good news Delphine finally allowed herself to sleep properly for the first time in ages but she slept in a chair next to his cot as she wanted to stay near him in case he needed her.
When she woke up the next morning she found Major James sitting up in his cot, he had some color in his face and he was staring down at her with those wonderful eyes.
“Sleep well?”
Startled by his question and by the fact that he spoke perfect French she stammered,
“Y..yes..thank you.”
“Good, it must have been exhausting taking care of me. I hear you never left my side.”
She wasn’t sure why but she felt irritated that he should know or comment on her devotion so she got to her feet and replied coolly in English,
“Naturally, you’re an important pawn for the French, I couldn’t let them down Monsieur.”
But instead of taking offense, the young man laughed and nodded his head,
“Quite agree. In any case I’m very glad to be alive.” He said with a grin.
“Yes..well you must be hungry, I’ll see about getting you some breakfast.”
Like an obedient child he allowed himself to be fed by her too weak to hold a spoon or his dish but when it came time for bathing him and changing him he balked and refused.
“I can do it on my own.” He insisted.
Delphine pointed out dryly that since he couldn’t feed himself, she didn’t see how he could bathe himself.
“Besides,” she added, “I’ve been doing it for you ever since you arrived you know.”
James looked embarrassed and muttered something about a man needing to keep his dignity and Delphine felt sorry for him. She could only imagine how difficult it must be for a man such as him to be reliant on strangers for the most basic needs. An enemy no less!
“You were wounded it had to be done unless you would have preferred lying in your own filth? The sooner you get better the sooner you can do everything on your own so don’t over exert yourself.”
She could tell from the expression on his face he didn’t like what he was hearing but he also couldn’t deny the logic of her words so he gave in. As Delphine brought over the bucket of hot water and dipped the sponge in it, she said with twinkling eyes,
“I didn’t look then and I promise not to look now.”
At her words, James smiled again and just like that they became friends. But Delphine soon realized bathing James while he was alert and awake was a very different experience than when he was unconscious. She was suddenly very aware of his masculine presence, of every dip and curve of his muscled body, of the heat in his eyes and she found herself fumbling with the sponge several times. She realized she was attracted to this man and wondered what it would be like to kiss him. She would have felt even more flustered had she known that similar thoughts were going through James’ head as he watched her diligently working away. He was studying the shine of her hair, the tilt of her chin, the sparkle in her eyes and the moist kissable lips. Thankfully the torturous ordeal came to an end soon after yet both found themselves secretly looking forward to the next one.
CHAPTER SEVEN:
Under Delphine and the doctor’s careful ministrations James began to rapidly get better. While he recognized he was nothing more than a prisoner he decided it was in his interest to make the best of a bad situation and tried not to complain about anything. He knew he was lucky to be alive. He tried to find out what had happened to the rest of his troops and if anyone had survived, especially Alfred who had so heroically pulled him out of harm’s way but nobody knew anything or if they did they weren’t telling. It was Delphine who finally managed to get the information from someone and she told him in hushed tones that nobody had survived.
“Anyone still breathing after the cannon blast was shot to death. And they didn’t kill you because…”
James finished the sentence for her feeling like he had let everyone down,
“I’m an officer. I know. Thank you for telling me Delphine. Would you mind very much leaving me alone for a bit?”
Delphine nodded and did as he requested. When she looked in on him
an hour later he was asleep in his cot with traces of dried tears on his face. They never spoke of it again but one day James requested some pen and paper,
“I want to write to the families of my men to let them know personally and it seems I have all the time in the world here don’t I?”
Delphine was too touched by his gesture to comment and went off to get him as much paper as she could find.
To her surprise once she got over the initial shock of life on the battlefield and settled into a daily routine, Delphine began to quite enjoy herself and for the first time in her life she felt useful, like she had a proper place in life. Life on the farm seemed like a lifetime ago, from another world as she became accustomed to war. She no longer felt fazed by the sight wounds, broken bones or she no longer felt nauseous whenever she smelled blood and stitching flesh became as easy as needlework.
There was very little time to focus on any of those things; the only thing that mattered was saving as many lives as they could. She performed all her tasks efficiently, learned in leaps and bounds and people soon came to depend on her. Not every duty as a nurse was unpleasant, the soldiers were fun and had interesting stories about their lives to share, there was blossoming friendship with the other nurses and even some of the soldiers, which was a treat for Delphine who had never really had close knit friendships. Daniel especially meant a great deal to her, even though he was a boy, she saw traces of Marie in him and his jolly conversations.
But the highlight of her day was spending time with James. Initially she felt worried about developing a friendship with the enemy and how it might be perceived by the others but being trapped by injuries in the same confined space did funny things to people and the lines which normally defined everyone’s station in society became blurred and everyone found common ground in an easy friendship. It also helped a great deal that most of them spoke French fluently so they were able to communicate with ease.
Over the course of several weeks and months Delphine and James got to know a lot about each other. They talked endlessly over their meals as Delphine fed him or during their walks when James was strong enough to be up and about and on his feet. They talked about their families, their childhoods, their countries, their likes and dislikes, even politics. Soon they knew each other so well, Delphine felt as though she could read his thoughts just from the expressions on his face. The only thing which never came up and which Delphine wanted to know about more than anything else was Ava.
James had muttered the name in his feverish state so many times Delphine was convinced she was important to him. And that was a devastating thought so one evening on one of their walks she brought it up lightly.
“You know when you had the fever you talked a lot in your sleep.”
“Oh? I hope I didn’t reveal any state secrets.” James said laughing.
“Nothing like that, you mostly called out names, one in particular more than others.”
“Was I cursing my father?”
“You kept calling out Ava and you sounded really sad.”
At the mention of Ava, Delphine felt his body stiffen next to her. And Delphine knew instantly she had brought up a hurtful subject.
Feeling remorseful she apologized,
“I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have pried. It’s nothing to do with me.”
“No it’s okay.” James hastened to reassure her. “It was just startling to hear her name.”
Unwilling to cause him any more distress, Delphine stayed silent but James continued to speak.
“I used to be sweet on her years ago.”
So I was right! Delphine thought, she is his beloved. A crushing despair filled her and it was in that moment Delphine realized she was in love with James. Slowly, steadily over the last few months she had fallen hopelessly in love with him but he belonged to someone else. She started fussing with her apron and exclaimed,
“Oh how lovely. Ava is such a pretty name.”
“Well she wasn’t a pretty person,” he said bitterly, “and I don’t mean her face, she was breathtaking to look at but she had an ugly heart.”
At his words, a strange hopeful, uplifted feeling began to stir within Delphine.
“Oh.”
“You may as well know, we were going to get engaged and then she suddenly dropped me and took up with my best friend.”
“How terrible!” Delphine cried out feeling outraged on his behalf. “You must have been devastated.”
“I was at first until I discovered that all she was after was a lofty title and great wealth. My friend was the better catch, he had a better title and much more money. My feelings for her died pretty quick after that.”
Delphine didn’t want to be impertinent but she was curious,
“Did they get married?”
James laughed, a harsh, dry laugh.
“No. My friend figured her out pretty quick and she had the gall to come back to me, begging me to take her back.”
“Did you?”
“Never.”
Unconsciously Delphine reached out and patted his hand,
“I’m sorry you had to go through such a heartbreak.”
James took a moment to answer enjoying the feel of her hand on his. It amazed him girls could be so different. Delphine was like a breath of fresh air compared to the silly girls of London society. There was no pretense about her, she was simple and honest. Love and warmth radiated from every part of her. She was the type of girl any man would be lucky to claim as his wife. A lump formed in his throat and he opened his mouth to say something of what he was feeling. But she removed her hand looking embarrassed, a rosy flush on her cheeks. James recalled her question and answered it honestly.
“I didn’t suffer any heartbreak, I was disgusted more than anything else and realized very early on I was lucky to have gotten away from such a scheming woman. I’m afraid it turned me off of the idea of girls and marriage.” He added ruefully.
Feeling relieved that Ava seemed to be out of the picture for good Delphine gave him a sweet smile and suggested they head back towards the tent.
CHAPTER EIGHT:
One evening in early spring a tragedy of sorts struck Delphine when Daniel suddenly died. He wasn’t the first patient to die but he was the first who had meant so much to Delphine and she found it a hard blow. He had been cheerful and jolly to the end never betraying how much pain he was in. James saw the devastation etched on Delphine’s face at Daniel’s death and his heart grew cold. For days she moped about with a sad face, not saying much and one night when James saw her creep out of the tent wiping obvious tears from her eyes he followed after her feeling concerned. He understood that she was in a lot of pain and he wondered if it was because she loved him. He hadn’t read anything more into her friendship with him but now he wondered.
He hated himself for feeling jealous, he knew he shouldn’t because after all it meant nothing to him whether she was loved someone else or not. It shouldn’t matter but somehow it did. He found her crying near a tree and he pulled her into his arms in a comforting gesture. As she lay her head against his chest, her slender frame shaking with silent, uncontrollable tears, it became desperately important to him to know whether she was crying of a broken heart or mourning a friend. Hating himself for doing it but knowing that until he did so, the ugly feeling twisting around his heart wouldn’t go away he whispered softly against her hair,
“Delphine….did you love him so very much? Don’t be so sad, love in one so young will come again.”
All at once the sobs ceased in a hiccup and she lay still in his arms. Presently she raised her face and looked him in the eyes. In the flickering glow of a lantern posted a few feet away, he could see her face was tear-stained and filled with anguish. Despair tore at his heart that she was filled with such so much pain at the young lad’s loss.
“Love him?” She asked finally.
“Yes, that’s why you’re crying isn’t it? Because you loved each other.”
“Oh James no.” She
uttered the words so softly he couldn’t be sure he had heard her correctly so he didn’t say anything at all. Delphine pulled herself away from his arms and dabbed at her cheeks with the edge of her apron.
“Thank you for being so kind.” She whispered, before turning to walk back towards her tent. James reached out into the darkness wishing he could hold her back and embrace her once more, he opened his mouth to call out to her but no sounds came out and then it was too late, she had already been swallowed up by the darkness. Much later that night he puzzled over what she could have meant when she had said,
“Oh James no.”
CHAPTER NINE:
As spring gave away to summer, James was starting to feel anxious for news of the war. He had gathered from the smattering of chatter amongst the French soldiers that things were not going very well for them and the Allies were rapidly gaining ground. Something told him it wouldn’t be long now before they won the whole damn thing.
But listening to idle gossip and getting real news were two very different things and whenever he asked Delphine anything she became tight lipped and refused to share anything she might know.
“There’s a war going on,” she had explained simply the day he had pressed her for information and demanded to know why she wouldn’t share anything with him, “passing along information to you would be betraying my country. I can’t do that.”
As annoyed as he felt, he had to respect her loyalty and knew he would have done the same. It made him love her even more if that were possible.
Then one evening towards the end of June, he felt a shift in the air. He could tell from the dark looks on the faces of the French officers that something terrible had happened. He was moved to another tent that night, away from the other soldiers. It was obvious they had things to discuss and plans to put in motion. For the most part James had been treated well and he had been allowed relative freedom to roam through the camp at will, eat with the other soldiers and even occasionally pitch in with their tasks, which he did out of sheer boredom. But that night he was bound up tightly to a pole inside the tent. The man who did it shrugged his shoulders apologetically to mean this wasn’t my idea. Trying not to read too much into anything, James took it all in stride, expecting to be released very shortly. But hours went by and nobody came, not even to bring him food. Eventually he knew everyone had gone to sleep, except the two men who would stand guard over the camp, he knew another man was stationed just outside his tent, tasked with watching him. Although where they thought he would go tied up as he was he didn’t know.
