by W.H. Harrod
“What an absolutely gorgeous day,” said Terrance as he sat back in Jess’s old rocking chair on the front porch of the caretaker house. From his vantage point, he could see Jess with the dogs out by the corral feeding the horses. Two thoroughbreds followed her every move as she tossed out fresh hay. They recognized a true friend, and now, so did he. His vivid recollection of Jess’s stand up performance in the face of perceived imminent danger maintained a permanent home in his memory.
Terrance now more fully comprehended the moral of the professor’s story, “Never travel with a friend who deserts you at the approach of danger.” They each had answered that question for the last time. No matter where life’s journey led them, they made the journey together.
He thought back six weeks to the wild days that brought such profound changes to his life. Enough excitement occurred during that one intense period to last him two lifetimes. Now, here he sat as contented as a twenty-four year old man, in love with a wonderful young woman, could be. He and Jess started living together and planned to be married early next year. His dream to attend law school at the university in Lawrence would become a reality in January—a mere two months away. His financial situation would never be an issue again, and a large part of his life’s work waited for him once he graduated from law school. No longer in dire need of money, he donated his ten percent of the Pick Six winnings to the professor’s project. But more importantly, he’d crossed generational barriers and made a lifelong friend of the professor. Lastly, he filled a deep hole in his soul with the discovery of his birth parents.
Each of these events alone gave him a reason to be grateful. But together, he still had difficulty comprehending this much good fortune.
The sound of Jess’s laughter roused Terrance from his pleasant reveries. Harvey, as usual, started acting out. After watching Jess feed hay to the horses, Harvey decided he, too, wanted some. Grabbing a mouthful of hay, he tried to chew it like the horses, and always ended up spitting out hay and throwing his big head around trying to get any loose stems off his face. Jess never ceased delighting in this act.
Considering the long trip they only last night returned from, everyone seemed to have lots of energy. He, Jess, and the dogs had piled into the trusty Cherokee and made a quick trip, yet again, back to Illinois to deliver Joseph Right’s ashes to their final resting place—spread out upon the earth covering Whitney’s grave, as well as down by the small creek behind the graveyard under the oak trees where he and Whitney were reported to have enjoyed so many of their best moments.
This time he felt none of the fear and foreboding that accompanied his previous trip. He and Jess sat by the creek and talked, as Howard and Whitney must have so long ago.
Terrance sensed a strong connection with the reunited spirits of Howard and Whitney as he and Jess enjoyed the peaceful moments. There he was an integral part of something good. When he departed from this place he planned to carry on the rightful legacy of his birth parent’s stolen lives. It made no difference that he would never be able to prove that Howard and Whitney were his real birth parents. For Terrance, their spirit had become more important than their genes. In his mind, all three of them were part of the same spiritual force—more than enough reason for him to claim them as his parents. He harbored no regrets about allowing Mrs. Bidwell to destroy the only remaining evidence that proved his lineage.
To consecrate this union, Terrance picked up the small bundle of letters on the table and pressed them against his heart. Mrs. Bidwell gave them to him before he and Jess left for Illinois. She told him that long ago Joseph had hoped that one day his son would read his letters and know how much he cared for him.
Terrance looked at the letters—sixteen in all. Why sixteen Mrs. Bidwell couldn’t say. But it made no difference; he was ecstatic to have them. He planned to read one each year for the next sixteen years, to take his time, and to savor each, one at a time. Hurrying no longer was a part of his life.
Terrance thought of another unexpected benefit arising from this amazing series of events—a renewed appreciation for all the love and concern shown him by his adoptive parents over his entire life. At seventeen when he found out about the adoption, an invisible wall of his own creation came between them. He tore down that wall and began working diligently to ensure nothing like it ever got built between them again.
So much for a young man to experience in so short a period of time, thought Terrance. He pondered the possibility of other young men throughout history experiencing such enlightening adventures. To start out traveling far from home, seeking fame and fortune, only to end up finding everything you ever wanted back where you started. Along the way finding out you’re not always the good natured, honest person you thought yourself to be, but rather, at times, a selfish schemer and deceiver. Learning you aren’t the only person in the world having been treated unjustly by life, that other people also experience injustices. Discovering first hand the wreckage of your fellow man’s evil deeds and finding out that man’s efforts are not always for the best. To accept that good and evil can exist side by side and that often, the greatest danger doesn’t lie with evil coming from without, rather it lies with evil coming from within. In the end, Terrance realized he would never have arrived at this fortunate position in life but for his recent experiences. Each one opened different parts of his mind and, if he ever made the mistake of believing he no longer need be concerned with such personal shortcomings, he might expect to see them revisited upon him.
In the future, he must never forget where he came from or what he had experienced. More importantly, each day he must tend to the defects of character that attempt to gain footholds in the fertile soil of his mind.
Terrance placed the bundle of letters on the table and picked up the small, framed proverb Jess gave him the day he set out on the adventure that brought him full circle. He may have saved himself a lot of trouble by reading the complete proverb the day she gave it to him, especially the last line.
“If you are without, there is room to
receive. If you possess much, fear of
loss will confound you. Do as the
wise man, become part of the whole.
Be still within, for All Things Return.”
