As I drove down the long cobbled driveway to the house, many things bounced around in my mind. I still didn’t know how my father was going to react, but at least I knew it wouldn’t be as extreme as my ridiculous mother. I smiled at the butler who let me in and followed him to my father’s study. My father was looking over paperwork at his desk when I walked in.
“Hi, Papa,” I said, knocking gently on the open door. He looked up, lowered his glasses on the bridge of his nose, and glanced at me.
“Bella, it’s a pleasure to see you,” he said, standing and walking around his desk toward me. I hugged him tightly and followed him back to his desk, taking a seat in front of it while he went back behind it to sit. “How is life treating you, dear?” he asked, leaning back into his seat.
I sighed and fiddled with my hands in my lap. There was no point in lying about how I felt. Lying had led me into a life of misery, and I just couldn’t do it anymore. My father leaned forward and studied me carefully. “Is that a little scratch on your face, bella?” he asked, taking off his glasses. I touched the cheek that was pretty bruised weeks ago and shrugged.
“Yeah, but it’s nothing. I accidentally scratched my face before filing my nails,” I lied. Had I told my father what Julius had done, I was pretty sure he would contact someone to assassinate him. I didn’t think it was that serious, but being the only daughter of an Italian man with money, I wouldn’t put it past him.
“So how are you? What brings you here unannounced today?” he asked. I looked up at him and took a deep breath. It was now or never.
“Papa, why is it so important that I marry Julius?” I finally asked. My father thought for a moment and folded his hands on his desk.
“Arianna, because you did not seek a path in which your mother and I think is successful, we would rather you marry someone who is. You will both have your own assets, yes, but perhaps he will encourage you to combine your assets and build something of worthy with him.”
“But Papa, you always taught me the value of a dollar growing up, no matter how much money we had. I grew up to not need money, you taught me that. I just want to be happy with my life doing something that I love and being with someone that I love.”
“Are you saying that you don’t love Julius?”
“Yes, and I don’t think I ever could.”
“Things could change, dear. I wasn’t completely in love with your mother when I married her, but as I spent more and more time with her after you were born, I realized all that she had to offer me emotionally.”
“So I’m supposed to marry him, have a baby, and just wait until I fall in love with him? I can’t do that,” I said, feeling my frustration building. What made him think that Julius would change simply because we were married? The man was having an affair. How did I know he would end that? He even hit me once, so how did I know it wouldn’t happen again?
“Sometimes, we don’t understand things, but it all becomes clear when the time is right. I can’t tell you what you can and can’t do, but I can remind you of the consequences if you choose to stray from what’s best for you.”
“Papa, I’m not a little girl anymore. I can make my own decisions. Threatening to disown me if I don’t marry a man I’m not in love with doesn’t seem to be what’s best for me. My marriage to Julius would simply be a business contract, a merger between families, if you want to be technical. You don’t know half the things we go through behind closed doors to understand how wrong this is. We don’t love each other. We’re just tolerating each other right now, and things are getting worse. If I lose my part of the estate, fine, but I’m stuck with Julius because he doesn’t want to lose his.”
“Give it time, dear. I can speak to him when he comes back from his business trip if you’d like, and maybe you two can work things out,” he said.
I rolled my eyes. Unless his business trip agenda consisted of plowing another woman while he waited for her to go into labor, I wouldn’t call it business. I shook my head and stood up.
“Sometimes, you run out of time, Papa. Besides, I can’t love Julius when I’m already in love with someone else.” The realization hit me like a ton of bricks. I couldn’t believe it. I was in love with Zane Foreman.
My father raised an eyebrow and tilted his head. “In love with someone else? If not with Julius, then who?” he asked, motioning me to sit back down. I sighed and took my place in front of him.
“You wouldn’t know him if I told you. He’s just a regular guy.”
“A regular guy ready to exploit you for your money. Don’t be naive—”
“But that’s the thing, Papa. He doesn’t even know who I really am. I didn’t tell him my real name. He has no idea who my parents are or where I came from. All he knows is some fake name that I gave him and that I’m an aspiring author. He knows the real me, not the person you and mom are trying to create. He’s really genuine, and he makes me feel everything that I don’t feel with Julius, including feeling wanted. Why won’t you let me be happy?” I asked, feeling tears burn my eyes. My father shook his head sternly and narrowed his eyes.
“Love and happiness will not allow you to keep the lavish lifestyle that you’re accustomed to, as it doesn’t pay any bills. I would advise you to wake up from this fantasy you’re living in. You’re to marry Julius, and that’s the end of the discussion.”
“You don’t even like him!”
“It looks like you have a decision to make, dear. Are you willing to give up everything and everyone that you’ve ever known for a man you barely know?” he asked, disregarding my previous statement.
My jaw dropped. Was he really giving me an ultimatum? I thought that coming here with the truth would give me some kind of insight regarding my options, but he basically told me I’d lose everything by choosing Zane.
“When you say everyone … what do you mean?” I asked slowly, afraid of his answer. He sighed deeply and leaned back in his chair.
“It means that Charlotte and I will no longer have a daughter. You will be cut from the estate and banned from coming onto the Donatelli property. If that ‘regular guy’ is worth all of that, good luck to you. You may leave now,” he said, turning back to his papers to signal that the conversation was over. Blinking back my tears, I slowly rose to my feet, and walked out of the study without a word.
When there was so much on the line, what was I to do? I’d come to the realization that I was in love with Zane, and I didn’t want to give up my life with him. On the other hand, I would be losing my family, probably my townhouse since they paid for it, and would be stripped from everything that I’ve ever known. No more social events, fashion shows, winery trips, father and daughter time, nothing. I would be alone. If Zane learned the truth and decided not to be with me, I would be giving up everything for nothing.
I blindly made my way to my car, and as soon as I closed the door, my tears fell. What did I get myself into? I would eventually have to make a decision, but how did I know which path was best?
Could I really walk away from Zane after everything that we’ve done? Could I really walk away from the only person who made me feel human and not like a business opportunity? This was something I’d have to think about long and hard.
AND THEN HE WAS GONE.
“SO, IT LOOKS LIKE we’re finished. The only thing we didn’t get to mark off the list was sex on the playground,” I said, closing my notebook and laying my head on Zane’s shoulder. He ran his hand up and down my arm and chuckled.
“Who said it was too late? We could do it, and squeeze it in there somewhere. If not, we can just use it for our own memories,” he grinned, tilting my head up to plant a kiss on my lips. I giggled and shook my head.
“There’s no way we’re doing that, Zane. Outside where the kids play? You’d really want to taint a playground?”
“Taint? More like breaking it in. It’s a new park, so we’d be testing the equipment to make sure it’s safe,” he winked. I shook my head. We’d had sex in many strange plac
es, but the playground was pushing it. When he got up and grabbed our coats, I looked at him with a puzzled gaze.
“Where are we going?” I asked, standing up, to follow him.
“Just a little walk. It’s not too cold out,” he said, shrugging his coat on. I reluctantly put mine on and followed him out the door. As soon as we stepped out, the cool breeze caressed my legs beneath my long skirt.
“Not too cold out, my ass,” I muttered, shooting him a glare as he intertwined his fingers with mine. He grinned and kissed my forehead.
“Sorry, I’m hot natured. It’s not that cold to me. For someone that always complains about the cold, you’re always in dresses and skirts,” he pointed out. I waved my hand to dismiss him. We walked hand in hand for a few blocks. My mind drifted back to the conversation I had with my father the previous week. I knew this was where I wanted to be and knew deep down in my heart that this was where I belonged. But I wasn’t Arianna in this life. I was only a fraud, a liar, and someone who was bound to hurt the very person she loved. I glanced up at Zane, who was focused on the path we were walking. I couldn’t bear the thought of being the one who caused him pain.
When we arrived at the park, I smirked at him. “Really, Zane?” I said. He grinned from ear to ear as he shook his head.
“No sex, I swear,” he promised, putting his arm around my shoulder. We each took a seat on a swing and slowly rocked back and forth. He stared out into the darkness for a while before clearing his throat and gazing over at me.
“Sienna, I never asked, but what are your dreams?” At this point, I just wished that all of this were a daydream. I wished that I would somehow awaken in a hospital bed with a concussion from hitting my head when bumping into Zane. I wished that I hadn’t let things get this far and that I never went out with Gia that night to even have the opportunity to run into him again.
How was it so easy to regret something that made me so happy?
“Sienna?” he called. I sighed and continued rocking in my swing.
“At this point, I just want to be happy. No matter what I’m doing or where I am, I just want to be happy, wherever that may be,” I finally said. He stood from his swing and came over to me.
“Baby, what’s going on with you? You’ve been distant almost all week. What’s bothering you?” he asked, taking my face into his hands.
I shook my head as a few tears fell. He wiped the tears away as confusion spread across his handsome features. “Why are you crying?” he asked. I took a deep breath and gazed at him.
“What will happen when this book is done?” I asked.
“What do you mean? Even when the book is done, you’re still my woman. We’ve been through this, babe. Book or no book, I want you, Sienna. Do you not want the same?” he asked, searching my face for an answer. I nodded.
“I do want that, Zane. But will you accept me no matter what?” I asked. His eyebrows furrowed in confusion.
“I do accept you. No matter what you think about yourself, I think you’re absolutely perfect. You mean a lot to me, Sienna, do you hear me?” he asked, gazing intensely into my eyes. I nodded as another tear fell. I could only hope that he would feel the same way when it was time to stop pretending.
“Come on; let’s go home, babe,” he said, holding out his hand to me. I took it and slowly stood, wrapping my arm around his waist while he draped his over my shoulder. Tears streamed down my cheeks as we silently made our way back to his building. Guilt was eating me alive, and I didn’t know how much longer I could remain strong before I would finally break down.
When we returned to his condo, I went straight to the bathroom. Looking at my reflection, I couldn’t even recognize the woman who returned my gaze. I wasn’t the same person I was before this project. Before, I was miserable because I was stuck in a relationship that I didn’t want to be in. Now, I had to decide what I was going to do in the end. The woman before me was someone who stepped out on her boyfriend, who stood up to her boyfriend, and a woman who was about to experience her first heartbreak. I splashed cold water on my face and tried to get a good grip on myself.
Zane lightly tapped on the door a few minutes later. “You alright in there?” he asked on the other side of the door. I turned off the water and dried my face.
“I’m fine,” I said when I opened the door to face him. He took me in his arms and hugged me tightly.
“Whatever’s bothering you, I promise it’s not as bad as you’re thinking it is. Everything will be fine,” he said, kissing my forehead. I inhaled his cologne and sighed. I hope he felt that way when he learned the truth.
I pulled away from him after a while. “I think some mind-blowing sex is in order to help me forget about it,” I said softly. He kissed me tenderly, running his hands through my hair, causing me to melt into his arms. When he pulled away, I was nearly breathless. He took me by the hand and led me to his bed where we undressed each other.
As he laid me down, he kissed me and gazed into my eyes. If things did go wrong, I would miss staring into his vanilla-brown bedroom eyes. They were the first thing I noticed when I first ran into him and something that would be seared into my memory forever.
“I don’t think I can give you mind-blowing sex tonight,” he finally said. I tightened my legs around him and kissed him.
“Please, Zane. I need you,” I whispered between kisses. He pulled back and shook his head.
“I want to make love to you tonight,” he said softly.
“But you said—”
“I know what I said. I love you, Sienna. Allow me to make love to you.”
It felt as if my heart were in my throat. My mouth opened and closed idiotically as I tried to process his reply. He smiled and kissed my lips. “I love you,” he whispered against my skin as he kissed my neck and eased into me. I closed my eyes and smiled as he repeatedly told me he loved me. The words sounded so sweet coming from his lips. He sat up a bit and pumped into me, looking deep into my eyes as he did so.
“Zane,” I moaned.
“Tell me what you want, baby.”
“I love you, too,” I breathed. He smiled and bent down to kiss me, never losing the rhythm of his stroke. In the beginning, he was only supposed to be my research partner. Neither of us were supposed to fall in love. He made me feel complete, but I still had that nagging thought in the back of my mind. When all of this was said and done, would he still love me?
***
It was hard parting ways the next morning. I had to go back home, and he was busy with his usual work routine. When we reached the lobby of his building, he kissed me passionately before letting me go for what felt like the last time. “I love you,” he smiled, kissing my hand. I gave him a small smile.
“I love you, too. I’ll call you,” I said. We walked out to our cars and went our separate ways. Watching his taillights in my rearview mirror made me feel as if my life were ending. I didn’t know when I’d be able to see him again now that Julius was back.
I also didn’t know what to expect from Julius when I went home to face him. We didn’t necessarily leave each other on good terms, so I could only imagine what he had up his sleeve.
When I arrived home, Julius was sitting at the breakfast nook with a glass of orange juice. “Morning,” he said when I came into view. I walked past him without a word and went straight to my office to put the finishing touches on my story before sending it off to Allison. He followed me into the office and dropped a manila envelope onto my desk.
“This was on the doorstep when I arrived from the airport this morning,” he said, taking another sip of his juice. I rolled my eyes and pushed it aside.
“It’s obviously addressed to you, so why are you showing me?”
“Have a peek at what’s inside,” he smirked. I glared at him as I opened the envelope and pulled out its contents. I sighed deeply as I went through photos of Zane and me kissing at the park.
“What, you’re going to show these to my parents to justify what you’ve done?
” I asked dryly, tossing the photos aside. Julius sat on the edge of my desk and shook his head.
“You’re forbidden to see him any further.”
“Says who? I have more dirt on you than you can ever find on me.”
“And that’s where you’re wrong, darling. I went on that trip to get the DNA test I requested when she told me she was pregnant. I’m not the father of that child, so you have no proof I’ve had relations of any sort. So, I would advise you to cease all communication with this man. I’d hate for him to have to find out the truth.”
“You don’t know who he is, and he doesn’t even know my real name. So have fun trying to do that.”
“You’ll learn not to underestimate me, Arianna,” he said with a grin before leaving the room. My pulse quickened as I tried to concentrate on the task at hand. How would he find Zane to tell him the truth in the first place? Maybe I needed to go ahead and tell Zane the truth. It was better for him to hear it from me than a complete stranger. Julius had his connections, which made it easy for him to find whoever he wanted, but with Zane being a regular guy and pretty discreet in this dealings, could Julius find him?
I pushed the thoughts to the back of my mind and began typing the ending of my story. I couldn’t believe that I was finally finished. Thanks to my experiences with Zane, I was able to create juicy scenes that even made Gia squirm, which I thought was completely impossible.
After writing, I leaned back and reflected on my experience with this project. It definitely changed me. Being with someone who truly appreciated and wanted me made me realize that I was wasting my time with Julius. I had finally found my own path to happiness, but it came with a hefty price that I wasn’t sure I was ready to pay. Sure, I had money saved up from my books, but how long would that last once I was on my own? It wasn’t cheap living in New York. If I decided to be with Zane, hopefully he would be open-minded and understand my situation once I explained it all to him … right? There was no guarantee with that, but I would remain hopeful for now.
The Daring Assignment Page 15
