by Ruby Moone
“I’m sorry,” he said, his voice was a thread in the darkness.
Tristan turned to look at him.
“So am I.”
Sam wasn’t sure what Tristan was apologising for. “I should be feeling more the thing by morning. I will slip away. I have endangered you enough,” he said.
Tristan didn’t move. He stared at him; unblinking. “You don’t need to.”
“I do. I never dreamed that anything like this would happen. If I had thought for a moment that by asking you to help me I would put you in harm’s way, I would never have done it.”
“Well, you did and I am here.” Tristan turned his head to look at the canopy again. “We should sleep.”
Sam nodded. He wanted to touch Tristan so badly it hurt. Wanted him to pull him over so he could lay his head on his chest, listen to his heartbeat and let it lull him to sleep, but Tristan rolled on his side away from him. Sam closed his eyes.
* * * *
Tristan awoke in the early hours with Sam moving around the room.
“Are you feeling unwell?” he asked as he peered through the gloom.
Sam slid back into the bed, bringing the cold with him and Tristan could feel him shivering. “No, just needed to piss,” he said as he crawled in. “And to have a drink. My mouth feels like sawdust.”
“How is your head?”
“I don’t know. I’m still asleep.”
Tristan smiled in the darkness and took a gamble. “Do you want to come over here?” He held up an arm. Sam hesitated, his expression unreadable in the dark, but then he shuffled over and squirmed under Tristan’s arm to lay his head on his chest. He wrapped an arm about his waist, and threaded one leg between Tristan’s. Tristan pulled the coverlet up about Sam’s ears and then let his arms close about him. He buried his nose in his hair as he let sleep claim him again.
* * * *
Sam awoke with a start to find himself alone in the bed. He blinked and moved experimentally. He definitely felt better. He stretched expansively and yawned and then peered around, but Tristan was nowhere to be seen. The bed was still warm so he couldn’t have gone far. Sam considered getting up and finding him, but was saved the effort when Tristan came back through the connecting doors. When he noticed him he paused and smiled tentatively.
“Good morning. How are you feeling?”
“Much better. Thank you.” He wanted to say thank you for holding me in the night but remained silent.
Tristan nodded as he walked to the bed. He wore only a nightshirt and Sam could tell he was erect beneath it and his entire body was filled with warmth. He swallowed.
“I have a proposal.” Tristan stood beside the bed. He looked resolute.
That startled Sam. “I see,” he murmured, not sure of how to respond. He waited.
Tristan cleared his throat. “I propose that we put everything behind us for a couple of days. Dante, the club, what I overheard; everything.”
Sam frowned. “What will that achieve?”
“We have a rather unique opportunity to just be ourselves. We don’t have to hide from anyone, worry about anyone…we can relax…” Tristan looked down for a moment. “Can we just be Tristan and Sam? Two men who like each other, desire each other and, for a couple of days, don’t have to hide how they feel?”
Sam’s entire being yearned to say yes, but he didn’t know if he would have the strength to say yes, spend days being together, and then walk away from him as he knew he needed to. He was trying to work out what to say when Tristan spoke again.
“Please.”
Sam’s throat closed up. He had to swallow a couple of times. How could this beautiful, aristocratic man be pleading with him after what he did. After the mess that he had landed him in?
“Tristan, I want you more than you can know but…I shouldn’t. I should let you go back to your life.” He shook his head, unsure about how to go on.
“Do you want me now?”
“I…”
Tristan reached over his head, pulled his nightshirt over his head, and stood before him. Naked. His beautiful, leanly muscled body was taut in the pale morning light and the sight of him aroused made Sam’s body flush all over again and lose whatever sense or will he possessed.
He threw back the covers and pulled off his own nightshirt, revealing his own arousal. He saw Tristan hitch a breath and run a hand over his balls and stroke his cock.
“Why don’t you bring that in here?” Sam said. His voice sounded husky even to his own ears.
“Are you sure? Are you up to this?”
“Why don’t we find out?” Sam spread his legs, allowing Tristan to climb in between them. He moved, but Tristan put a hand on his chest and made him lie still.
“This is just us. Me and you. Sam and Tristan. Nothing to do with money, nothing to do with anything other than the fact that you are a beautiful man and I want you. Do you want me?”
Sam melted at the thread of uncertainty in Tristan’s tone. He hadn’t realised how unsure he felt, and supposed that when you were paying for someone you never quite knew if they wanted you or not. He sighed. “I want you,” he said. “I want you so very badly.”
Tristan leaned forward and caged Sam’s body with his arms, leaving Sam breathless. In their encounters he usually took charge, but he laid back and let Tristan’s mouth find his. They kissed. Softly at first, but then Sam was reaching up to deepen the contact. It felt like coming home. Tristan lifted up after a while, smiled, and then plied soft kisses down Sam’s throat, his chest, and then bit softly at his nipples, making Sam moan and writhe beneath him. He remained still as Tristan worked his way down his body and as he reached his navel and dipped his tongue into the indent, Sam closed his eyes and went to take himself in hand, but Tristan caught him and held his hand back. Sam was panting now. Back arching, waiting, needing. Tristan nibbled and kissed the soft skin beneath his navel and Sam cried out and threw his head back into the pillow. By the time he could feel Tristan’s warm breath tantalisingly near his cock, he knew he was about to explode.
“Tris, please, please.” Christ, he was begging, but when Tristan’s warm mouth closed over him he groaned loudly at the sheer pleasure, the intensity of sensation as his tongue slid around his shaft, as he licked and then sucked him down hard. Tristan cupped his balls and rolled them gently as he pleasured him. Sam knew he wouldn’t last so he pushed at his head. Tristan immediately pulled off, sat up, spit in his hand, and took both their cocks together and, laying on top of him pumped them hard. He pushed himself up on one arm and Tristan looked into his eyes.
“Come for me,” Tristan said, and those words, coming from his beautiful lordling, sent him over. His whole body contorted with the wave of unadulterated pleasure that pulsed into Tristan’s hand, shouting as he did so. Tristan followed him into the abyss with a hoarse cry. They clung together, breathing hard. Sam wrapped his arms around Tristan and kissed the dampness of the skin on his shoulder. Tristan burrowed into him, not seeming to mind the sticky mess between them. Sam sifted his fingers through Tristan’s hair and kissed him again. How in God’s name was he ever to give this man up?
Chapter 13
Sam’s appetite appeared to be returning. Tristan watched as he wolfed down a pile of sausage and eggs. His colour was better, and his eyes had regained that incorrigible sparkle that had been missing. Tristan wondered if any of this was down to their activities during the early morning. He usually took a passive role in their encounters, but this morning had been remarkably satisfying. Taking control of their loving, and hopefully being able to take control of their lives was perhaps what he needed to do. He glanced around the room and was relieved that breakfast appeared to be a quiet, informal affair with people drifting in and out, and after a little while they found themselves alone for a moment.
“Are you familiar with the Marquess of Wallingford?” Tristan asked.
Sam frowned. “I’ve heard the name, but I don’t know him.” He shook his head. “I might know him by
sight,” Sam said as he applied marmalade to another piece of toast. “Why do you ask?”
“He turned up last night. Just after you had retired. It was a bit of a surprise.”
Sam paused with the toast half way to his mouth. “Why?”
Tristan hesitated himself and thought for a moment. “Well, he is terribly well connected, influential…a shocking gossip.” Tristan shrugged. “Not the sort of chap one would expect to find here.”
Sam grinned and took a huge bite. When he had swallowed, he wiped his mouth with his napkin. “Point him out to me and I will tell you if he has ever been to Dante’s. I’ll wager he has. All the toffs go there.”
Tristan ignored the flutter of unease in his stomach. “Ah…do you recognise some of the people here?”
Sam swallowed, stared at his toast, and nodded.
Tristan wanted to ask if he had…
“I have never bedded any of them though. None of them were clients of mine.”
Tristan’s stomach unknotted. Marginally. “That’s…good to hear.”
Sam sighed and rubbed the back of his neck. “Now do you see why I could never come to the clubs with you?”
Tristan nodded.
They ate in silence as the room filled up again. When Sam pushed his plate away, Tristan put his fork down.
“The weather looks quite pleasant. Perhaps we should take a walk. It might help clear you head.”
Sam gave a polite nod and gestured for them to leave. As they walked out Tristan watched Sam studiously ignore the occupants of the breakfast room and sighed.
* * * *
They had not walked far when Tristan heard a shout from behind and turned to see Alfie pursuing them with Gareth beside him.
“Good morning,” Alfie said as he reached them.
“Good morning. I trust you had a good night?” Tristan said the words without really thinking but then flushed at the scorching look Gareth exchanged with Alfie.
Sam saved him from having to offer a response by speaking over whatever Gareth was going to say. “We are heading out for a walk. What are your plans?”
Alfie raised an eyebrow. “Should you not be considering what needs to be done to get you out of this mess?”
Sam’s jaw jutted and his eyes narrowed but he maintained his smile. “Yes. That is exactly the plan. However, I see no harm in a walk. I need to clear my head. It might be a good idea to have these discussions away from the house, too?”
Alfie nodded. “Do you want to talk now, or are you two…enjoying the sunshine together.”
Tristan thought it best to intervene. “Alfie, we are merely walking off breakfast. We will be back at the house before too long. Would you like to talk then, or join us on our walk?”
Alfie smiled. Slowly. “We will leave you to, ah, enjoy the sunshine.”
“Thank you.” Sam’s tone was pleasant but firm.
Alfie and Gareth disappeared and Tristan and Sam walked.
“Your cousin is an irritating man.” Sam said, quite pleasantly.
Tristan laughed. “He is the most annoying creature that I know, but he is family. And when everything went to hell he was there to help. He came and made sure that you were not going to die, he helped us to get away, he brought us here…” Tristan glanced at Sam.
Sam shook his head. “As I said. Annoying. Nothing worse than being beholden to an annoying man.”
Tristan laughed, and as Sam laughed with him something relaxed a little between them. They walked in a more companionable silence for a while. When they reached a large ornamental pond with a seat positioned to take advantage of the magnificent view Sam motioned for them to sit. Tristan was pleased when Sam took his hand as they placed themselves side by side.
“It’s so unfair, isn’t it?”
“What is?”
Sam turned in the seat so that he could better face Tristan. “Unfair that I can’t court you.”
“Court me?” Tristan was taken by surprise. “If anyone were to do the courting it would be me.”
Sam’s lips twitched as he evidently tried to suppress a smile. “No, it would definitely be me.”
Tristan laughed aloud. “I thought we agreed that for today we would be equal.”
“We did. We did,” Sam said.
“We truly are an aberration, are we not?” Tristan looked out over the landscape.
“Don’t ever say that. We are…all that is wonderful.” Sam leaned over and kissed Tristan on the mouth. “I just wish it could last.”
“And why can’t it?” Tristan kissed Sam back.
“Well, there are all manner of reasons.”
“Name them.” Tristan turned so that they were looking at each other.
Sam tilted his head to one side. “Well, you have money and a high-ranking position, and I don’t have either of those things.”
“I don’t see that as a barrier.” Tristan was firm.
Sam hesitated and pursed his lips. “Well, and please don’t take this badly, but that’s easy for you to say being the one with all the money and position.”
Tristan frowned. “Why is that a barrier? It worked before. All you need to do is come home once we have sorted out this mess with Dante and Mosely.”
“With me living in accommodation you paid for, wearing clothes you paid for, eating food you paid for, and me waiting on my own all day to see if you are going to call in to be fucked?”
Tristan felt as though someone had drenched him in ice cold water. Was that how he viewed their arrangement? He stared at Sam for a moment and then looked away. “I had no idea that was how you saw us. I thought that was what you wanted when you asked for my help.”
“I thought so, too, until I realised that I actually do have some pride.” Sam tilted his head and then stroked Tristan’s cheek. “I think it hit me when you offered me pin money as if I were your mistress and it dawned on me that that was exactly what I was. Your mistress. Someone to keep tucked away, out of sight.”
“I’m sorry I made you feel that way. It was never my intention.” Tristan knew his tone was stiff and probably accusatory but he didn’t seem to be able to help it.
Sam reached over and took his hand. Tristan held on tight.
“And now, not only did I drag you into my sordid world I have put you in danger. Grave danger.”
“There are no rules for this kind of relationship,” Tristan said, holding tight to Sam’s hand.
“Yes, there are,” Sam said, looking at him. “The law has plenty of rules about it. So does the church.”
“Not those kind of rules,” Tristan said. “The kind of rules that men and women have. Courtship rules.”
“Tristan.” Sam paused, his head down bent. “There are no rules so we must make it up as we go on, but we know that this can’t last. Don’t we?”
“Of course.” Tristan looked away as he said it.
“I’d like to have this weekend because you want me. Not because you are paying me, but because you want to be with me. Just as you said.”
Tristan’s heart hurt. He realised that as he tried to breathe in. Realised it as he tried the lie in his head. “Just for this weekend then,” he said. “We will just have this weekend.”
Sam’s smile widened as he reached into his pocket and pulled out a vial of oil. “Have you ever been fucked outdoors?”
Tristan stared, and then doubled up laughing and wondered if it was hysteria.
* * * *
Tristan wriggled and brushed in the region of his bare arse. Sam peered down his nose at him. “What are you doing?”
“Something was crawling on me,” he muttered.
Sam brushed his hand over Tristan’s beautiful backside. The one he had thoroughly taken only a few minutes prior. “Better?”
“Hmm. I suspect laying naked in the grass sounds better in theory than it is in practice.”
Sam was inclined to agree. He was freezing cold and damp but hadn’t wanted to spoil the moment.
“Perhaps we should dre
ss?” Tristan said.
They got up awkwardly, brushing grass and twigs from each other’s semi-naked bodies as they did so. Sam took the opportunity to run his hands all over Tristan’s taught muscles again and was surprised when his cock started to fill. Tristan bent over to retrieve his clothing and Sam trailed a finger lightly over his crease, making him jump and turn around. Sam looked down at his groin and then up at Tristan and waggled his eyebrows.
“Good Christ, man, you are insatiable.” A look of pure delight crossed Tristan’s face and he immediately dropped to his knees in front of Sam and took him into his mouth, making Sam shout with surprise and delight and Tristan laugh with his mouth full. In moments Sam was convulsing down Tristan’s beautiful throat and shouting aloud. Sam’s heart was thundering as he grabbed Tristan and rolled him to the ground, both of them laughing, but when Sam found Tristan’s cock and took it into his own mouth, Tristan moaned and tried to push him away, but it didn’t take long to have him shuddering his own release. They lay entangled in the grass again, hearts thundering.
“I think,” Tristan said, panting, “that we are back to where we began.”
Sam laughed and held him tightly and then kissed him hard.
“You taste of me,” Tristan said, running his tongue over his lips.
“And you of me.” Sam kissed him again and then licked his own lips. They laughed and rubbed noses.
“I had no idea this could be fun,” Tristan said after a moment, as he pulled back so he could look into Sam’s eyes. “Sexual congress always seemed such an intense, serious business.”
