“Hello?” I answer breathlessly.
“Have you talked to Lea?” Gabe asks cautiously. It’s quiet in the background and I know they’re on the road.
“No. I don’t know what the fuck is going on, but I got to the apartment and she’s moved out,” I growl. “Why the fuck would she do this? She said she fucking believed me.”
“Dude, you need to calm down and call her. I just talked to April and Lea’s with her.” Everything makes less sense now than it did a few minutes ago, as if that’s possible. Why did both of them go off the grid for over twenty-four hours? And why isn’t Gabe as livid as I am?
“What. The. Fuck…is going on?” I ask through gritted teeth. I’m sick of the secrets. Sick of being the one on the outside when it comes to the woman I want to spend the rest of my mother fucking life with.
“Call her before you jump to conclusions more than you already have. Can I talk to Pete?” he asks, abruptly ending our conversation.
“He’s down in the truck.” Fuck, I can’t leave him sitting down there. From the sounds of it, we’re going to be here for a while, so he might as well be someplace warm.
“I’ll call him. You call your girl and we’ll see you when we get to Chicago.” Without giving me a chance to pry for more information, Gabe hangs up.
Now that I know she’s okay, I want to wring her neck. I’ve spent the better part of the past twenty-four hours thinking the very worst, and she’s off with April? Who in the fuck does that? And why would she do that knowing that we had plans to meet up?
As much as I want to hear Lea’s voice to know she’s okay, I can’t call her yet. Until I know my temper is in check, I can’t dial her number. Walking out to the barren living room, I quickly dial Aaron’s number, hoping he worked tonight so I’m not waking him and Rebecca. “Hello?” Aaron answers sleepily. Fuck, couldn’t one thing go my way tonight?
“Hey, sorry to wake you,” I say, unwilling to hang up and call him back in the morning. Aaron knows more about the relationship I have with Lea than anyone else, including our local friends. He’s been my friend and mentor for the past few months, the one who can talk some sense into me when my brain is on overload. And he knows the toll this life can take on most families.
“Don’t mention it, what’s up?” he whispers. A door closes quietly in the background, telling me that he was, in fact, sleeping next to his wife, not just passed out on the couch.
“Have you heard from Lea? Pete drove me to the apartment tonight and she’s gone.” I close my eyes tightly, hoping that when I open them, I won’t be staring at a blank wall, that Lea will walk through the door and this will have all been some sort of fucked up nightmare.
The long silence from Aaron’s end of the line isn’t helping me. “I’m sure everything is fine. Try calling her, ask her what’s going on.”
“I want to, Aaron, but I’m not sure I can trust myself to stay calm. For fuck’s sake, she missed my show tonight.” I punch the cushion next to me, which is far too soft to offer me any relief. “I thought it was because of the weather, but then I find out she left my car at a buddy’s up here, which means that, wherever she is, she didn’t drive. What am I supposed to think?”
“I get what you’re saying, but I’m begging you, don’t do or say something you can’t take back just because you’re pissed right now. Talk to her,” he pleads. “I’ll sack out on the couch in case you need to call me back. Everything will be okay, I promise.”
By the time we hang up, I’m still far from calm, but I feel little bit better, like I will be able to talk to Lea without blowing up at her in the first thirty seconds of the conversation. Now, if I could just shake the feeling that everyone knows something they’re not fucking telling me. First Gabe and now Aaron. How can he be so certain that my life isn’t falling apart?
Chapter 21
Lea
If my belief in omens were stronger than my feelings for Colby, I would have turned this truck around last night and gone back to the safety of our apartment. We wound up having to pull over in Rockford because the truck engine kept stuttering, which delayed us by a few hours, meaning there was no chance of avoiding the storm. I kept hoping Colby would call me, but no such luck.
Then, thanks to our unscheduled pit stop, we wound up hitting icy roads in the middle of nowhere, Illinois. Over a decade into the twenty-first century, it’s hard to imagine that there’s a single square mile in this country that doesn’t have cell coverage, but somehow, April and I were forced to pull off in just such a place. The motel was the type where you parked right outside the door and worried about catching something just from sitting on the bed.
And lucky us, we got to pay for two nights in that dive because the state patrol was advising motorists to stay off the roads until midnight tonight. Now, we’re back on the road and should be getting home sometime just before dawn. The first thing I’m going to do when we get there is take a long hot shower, possibly using a Scotchbrite pad instead of a loofah, just to make sure I get all of the ick off my body.
I should have called Colby as soon as April got back in the truck and told me that she had talked to Gabe and he said that Colby flipped out when we weren’t at the show tonight. Had I known how my luck was going to take a turn for the worse, I would have sucked it up and left him a voicemail telling him what was going on. But once again, I gambled and lost. It killed me to not call as soon as I heard that, but April told me that Gabe wanted to talk to Colby first to talk some sense into him. He must really be pissed if Gabe’s getting in the middle of it.
So now, I’m cruising down I-57, trying to pay attention to the road in front of me, but my mind and eyes keep wandering to the phone sitting next to me on the bench seat. The display illuminates the cab of the truck before it starts ringing with Colby’s face smiling back at me.
“Baby, I’m so sorry about tonight,” I cry the moment our call connects. “We wound up in an area with no service and I couldn’t call. If I had known, I would have left a message.”
The entire time I’m rambling, I can hear Colby calling my name. “Lea, stop,” he demands. His tone is almost guttural. If it were possible, I would try to disappear into the seat. Instead, I start watching the road signs for an exit where it’ll be safe for two women to pull over in the middle of the night. “Don’t get me wrong, I’m pissed as hell, but not because you missed my show.”
The steady calm creeping into his voice concerns me. It’s nearly despondent now that he has my attention. “I’m trying hard to give you the benefit of the doubt here, but you should know that right now I’m sitting on our couch, staring at where my television should be, but there’s nothing there. And when I went into our bedrooms, it was more of the same.”
A sob escapes my throat as I imagine what must have been going through his mind when he got home tonight. It hadn’t even occurred to me to leave a note there, just in case something like this happened. I never wanted him to find out this way. Even if I spent all night and half of tomorrow listing off the reasons to him why I didn’t tell him sooner, it won’t change the end result. After promising him I wouldn’t lie to him anymore, I kept something major from him. A decision that should have been made with him, not for him, and now I don’t know if he’ll be willing to listen to me at all.
“Colby, you have to know none of this was supposed to happen this way,” I plead with him, tears streaming down my face, blurring the road in front of me. “I need to find a place to pull over, but then I’ll explain everything to you. I just hope you’ll forgive me, otherwise all of this was for nothing.”
A truck stop in the distance acts as a beacon. I shift to the right lane, slowing down when I come upon the exit. April stirs when I stop the truck, but quickly goes back to sleep. I step out into the cold night air, wishing I had thought to put my winter coat on.
“Baby, I’m trying to be patient, really, I am, but can’t you see how this looks from my perspective?” Colby sighs into the phone, defeat taking the p
lace of anger. “We had a fight because of those stupid fucking rags, you didn’t come to see me when you said you’d be there, and now you’re just gone. And to top it all off, you had everyone worried sick about you because you didn’t answer your fucking phone for almost thirty-six hours. What am I supposed to think?”
“I know how bad it looks, but please, hear me out.” I’m begging now, drawing the attention of the truck drivers sitting at the counter of the small diner. “I found us a place in Nashville. I hate being apart from you and I’m not a fan of living out of a suitcase when I’m with you. And I really hate thinking of the time that we’re together as me visiting. We didn’t come to your show because of the storms. We packed up the night I talked to you and then I left you that message and we took off as soon as we could. Because I hadn’t told you about the condo I found, I didn’t want to tell you in a voicemail message that I was loading a moving van and I’d see you when you got back to Nashville. It was this avalanche of bad decisions that I can’t fix now.”
I’m not sure I take a single breath as I explain, needing to get everything out as quickly as possible.
“Why didn’t you answer your phone? I spent all damn day and night, including when I was up on stage, worrying that something terrible had happened to you.” This time, I’m the one causing him pain. I was stupid and immature and thought I knew how to handle this entire situation but I couldn’t have been more wrong. “It got so bad that Pete told me to get in the truck before Missy even went on stage, just so we could find out if you were dead or alive. Seriously, Lea, that’s the type of shit this stunt had running through my mind. I thought you were fucking dead on the side of the road somewhere.”
“I know, and I’m sorry,” I apologize. “We wound up having to pull over and didn’t have any cell service. We just got back on the road a few hours ago and I was going to call you, but then April said Gabe wanted to talk to you first. Trust me; I’m not trying to keep anything from you. I’ve done too much of that already. I don’t know what I can do to make this up to you, but I promise, I’ll do whatever it takes.”
The waitress stands in front of me, holding up the coffee pot. I flip my cup over, figuring I might as well get some caffeine in me since I’m taking up space in her restaurant. She offers me a friendly smile and I mouth the words ‘thank you’ to her before she walks off.
“I’m still upset, Lea,” Colby warns me. I figured as much. This time, I screwed up big time and it’ll take a while to earn his forgiveness. “I swear to God, if we get through this, it’s the last fucking time. You keep shit from me again and we’re done. I love you, but the past two days nearly fucking killed me.”
“I won’t, baby,” I promise, wishing I could turn off the never-ending tears. “I should have told you, but I was so worried that you’d worry about me instead of work.” It’s a lame excuse, even to my own ears.
“So you’ve said,” he says, somewhat sarcastically. “We’ll talk more about all of that when I get home, but tell me this...when did you find a place? And what about school?”
As I sip my coffee, which is reminiscent of oil sludge, I tell him about the condo and how Aaron and Rebecca helped me cover the security deposit. He’s not thrilled about being indebted to them, but I can tell he’ll get over it quickly since it means we’ll be together.
“I just… Lea, you have to fucking talk to me about this shit,” he grumbles. If I close my eyes, I can almost see him twisting his shaggy hair between his fingers and then rubbing his palms across the stubble on his cheeks. “Fuck, baby. I thought you were dead somewhere. And then, when I got to the apartment, I thought I had lost you. I can’t do that again. I’ve asked before, but apparently, I didn’t get through to you; I need you to tell me what’s going on in your mind. I’m a lot of things, but psychic just ain’t one of them.”
I laugh, thankful that we’re finding a shred of levity after so much tension. “I know, baby. When Rebecca mentioned it, I didn’t want to distract you at the start of your tour. Plus, I wasn’t sure the owner would hold the place until the end of my finals. And then, I was going to tell you in Rochester, but obviously that didn’t happen.” We’re going around in circles at this point, but I need him to understand. He ends the cycle and starts telling me about the rest of the stops on this last leg of Missy’s tour.
We wind up talking long enough that April sits beside me, rubbing the sleep from her eyes. “You okay, Lea?” she whispers, flipping over her cup. I nod, holding up a finger to let her know that I’m almost done. It’s nearly six in the morning and Colby’s been drifting in and out for a while now. I’m sure I didn’t win any brownie points with Pete tonight, since he’s currently sleeping in my bed, without any sheets or even a pillow.
“Baby, we’re going to get something to eat and hit the road. I feel nasty after sleeping at that cockroach motel and I really need a shower.” Plus, the battery on my phone is low and I don’t want our first conversation since I screwed up everything to get cut short thanks to technology. “I will call you when we get to Nashville. Try to get some sleep.”
“I will, now that I know you’re okay,” he sighs. “Don’t ever pull a stunt like this again. I mean it, Lea. If we can’t talk shit through, we’ll never work out with me being gone so much.”
“I know. I love you, Cowboy,” I whisper, despising the fact that he’s still angry with me, even if he’s acting calm. This must be the type of shit my dad was talking about when he said it’s time for me to learn to be an adult, even if it means falling on my butt a few times.
“I love you too, Lea. Drive safe and call me when you get there. If I don’t pick up, it probably means I’m dead to the world. In that case, call Gabe and let him know.” We say goodbye as my phone warns me for the third time that the battery is low.
**
It’s just after eight when I park the moving van in front of Aaron and Rebecca’s house. Taylor comes bounding out the front door, almost barreling into the road before she stops in her tracks. I quickly round the front of the van, scooping her into my arms. I look up to see Aaron and Rebecca, holding one another close on the front porch and I feel at peace with my decision. These people may have been strangers to me a few months ago, but now, they’re family. Being here, with them, close to where Colby is when he’s not on the road feels right.
“Hey, troublemaker,” Aaron calls out, ambling through the yard to give me a quick, brotherly hug. “Seriously, you may hold the all-time record for amount of shit stirred in a forty-eight hour period.”
“I know and I owe you a huge apology. I didn’t mean to upset everyone.” Aaron rubs my back, not saying a word. He leads me into the house, where Rebecca has eggs, bacon and coffee ready and waiting for us. I don’t tell her it’s only been a few hours since we ate. “So, what time are we going over to sign the lease? I have to get the truck back by six tonight or they’ll charge me extra.”
Aaron and Rebecca look at one another and I know something’s wrong. I’m about to crawl out of my skin, lashing out at them to tell me whatever they have to say when Rebecca finally speaks. “So, how set on that condo were you?” she asks, looking everywhere but at me. I knew we should have taken care of the paperwork before I went home. A responsible adult wouldn’t have packed up her belongings, upset her parents and almost lost the man she loves without having concrete plans in place.
“Well, unless you want us living with you, pretty set. Why?” I ask warily. Aaron grabs my mug, refilling it while I stare at his wife.
“He wound up selling it,” she blurts out and the news has me ready to bolt for the bathroom. Rebecca moves beside me, placing her hand on my shoulder. “He got an offer he couldn’t refuse, sweetie. The good news is that, while you were gone, he had to evict some tenants from another property and it’s perfect for the two of you.”
Okay, well that’s not so bad. At least I’m not homeless. “Have you seen it?” She nods enthusiastically, grabbing her iPad off the kitchen counter.
�
�Here, take a look.” I swear, this woman must have the realty website bookmarked or set as her homepage. I scroll through the pictures, my jaw dropping a little more with each one.
If I could have picked a place to live, this would have been it. Instead of a condo, we’re going to have our own little brick house. It’s light and airy, all on one level, and even has a cute backyard. As I scroll through the images, I can’t wait to get in there to start decorating. “When can we see it?” I ask, passing the iPad over to April so she can see the house.
“Damn, girl! I need to find me a friend like Rebecca.” We all laugh. April’s made no secret of the fact that she hates their apartment and can’t wait to get out. From the looks of it, this home is in some sort of community, so I make a mental note to see if they have any vacancies coming up.
“Oh, crap!” I shriek, rushing to retrieve my phone out of my purse. “I told Colby I’d call as soon as we got here. Shit, he’s going to be pissed again.”
“Chill out,” April teases. “I talked to Gabe, he said that Colby passed out as soon as he got on the bus. He has a few Sharpie tattoos because he didn’t even make it back to his bunk, but he’s otherwise unharmed. Gabe said he’d let Colby know that we made it as soon as he wakes up.”
I lean against the doorway, staring at three people I never thought I would have in my life and yet can’t imagine not having them here with me.
Aaron excuses himself so he can take the kids to school. They’re late, but he insisted it was okay because they were both excited to see me. It’s a small gesture, but to me, it means the world. These people don’t care about me because they have to—they care because they want to, much like our circle of friends back home. And they’re imparting those beliefs on their children, even if it means skipping the first hour of school. That is the type of parent I hope to be someday, not the dictatorial example set by my own parents. I know Dad and I are getting along better now, but there’s still a lot of bitterness that I’m carrying around on a daily basis.
Dare to Dream (Truth or Dare #2) Page 18
