by Admin
Spending Christmas Eve with her family and Paul was a treat. The church service was amazing. Bright colorful lights winked from the large evergreen behind the pulpit. A golden baby Jesus replica perched at the edge of the pastor’s platform. Overhead, a ceiling of stars spread across the pews, though one shined brighter than the others, a symbol of Christ’s birth.
Paul was sitting next to Raylee and her mom. The congregation was dressed up, the women and girls in their best dresses or dressy shirts and pants, the men and boys in suits. Paul had told Raylee when they'd first arrived how out of place he felt dressed in a polo t-shirt and blue jeans, but she'd assured him that his attire was fine.
Pastor Johnson proceeded with Jesus’s birth, reading from Luke 2, expounding on the miracle birth and emphasizing how God, Jesus incarnate, came to rescue the world from their sins. The picture painted in the sacred writings was incredible. A tiny perfect baby brought into this world, a baby who would one day be a man that died for everyone so that they could have salvation.
She knew the story, had heard it her whole life. She knew the mysterious miracle. But listening to it now, paying close attention to each word in his Bible as her dad spoke them, reminded her of how incredible it all was. For her, for her parents, for this church, for Paul, for anyone who wanted it and desired His Love, it was there, a free gift.
Just a few months ago, she’d been convinced that attending Silver Canyon was a mistake. But she’d found a good set of friends, especially in Paul. He didn’t have any romantic feelings for her, and neither did she for him, so it made their friendship relaxed, easy.
And knowing that he believed in the Bible as God’s Word, that he cherished it and loved Jesus, reassured her in their friendship.
“Today in the town of David a Savior has been born to you; he is the Messiah, the Lord." Pastor Johnson closed them out with this verse, then proceeded to a final prayer, giving thanks for the wonderful gift of Jesus.
Her heart swelled with peace that could only come from knowing Him. As she bowed her head and closed her eyes, she thanked God for this friendship, for this church, for bringing Paul here to this small town.
After the service, Raylee’s parents invited him over for dinner. He obliged. He and his parents wouldn’t be celebrating Christmas until tomorrow, and they had already made plans for a night out, just the two of them.
Raylee’s dad had prepared a juicy ham, homemade macaroni and cheese, and fresh hot Italian bread. They were all seated at the dining table, just off the kitchen.
“Did you see the new shine on the Thunderbird?" Raylee’s dad was saying. When his dad passed, it had been handed down to him. “It was just baptized, cleansed from its sins."
Raylee groaned. “Dad, that is both cringeworthy and stale."
He simply chuckled and sipped his iced tea. “So, Paul, what plans do you have with your parents for Christmas?"
He wiped his mouth with a napkin. “We open presents under the tree, then head out into Waterman to see all of the neighborhood Christmas lights. The work they put into decorating their homes is incredible."
“Indeed. We drove through some of the neighborhoods a few years back when Raylee was just a little thing. Beautiful, absolutely beautiful. It just warms the heart to see the beauty of the holiday celebrated."
“Raylee told us a while back that you want to follow in your dad’s footsteps? Is that still the case?" her mother asked.
“Yep, ever since I was a kid, I’ve loved cars, everything about them."
“You should see his room. He’s got Tonka Toy Corvette replicas everywhere."
Paul gave her a look. “Hot Wheels, Raylee. A very important distinction."
They both laughed. Then her dad asked, “What do you think of the T-Bird?"
“It’s gorgeous, Mr. Johnson. Spotless as sin."
Mr. Johnson choked and burst with laughter. Mrs. Johnson lightly tapped his back and handed him his water. Raylee shook her head, grinning as she glanced at Paul.
“Thanks for the invite. We don’t usually laugh this much at dinner at my house."
After their meal, Mrs. Johnson presented dessert. “Chocolate Cream pie. Raylee’s favorite," she announced, setting down a silver platter of the whipped cream pie.
Raylee’s eyes lit up and she hurried to scoop a fat piece onto her plate.
“Manners!" her mother joked.
To Paul, Raylee said, “This is the best chocolate cream pie you will ever have. Trust me!" Without asking, she slid the fat slice onto a dish for him.
Laughing, he grabbed his spoon and cut into the piece. His eyes got big as he took his first bite.
“See?" she said. “I told you."
Her mom was serving up slices to herself and Raylee's dad, then sliding a single piece onto her daughter's plate.
“Two." Her mom gave her a look. "Please," she added.
Her mom laughed, shaking her head as she dished out a second piece.
“How’s school treating you, Paul?" her mother asked.
“Not bad. Can’t complain."
After finishing their dessert, her parents left them to spend a little time alone. Finishing her second slice of chocolate pie, the phone rang unexpectedly.
Raylee was thrilled to hear Donald’s voice until he spoke.
"I just don’t see the point in us talking anymore."
That was all he said. He didn't wait for a response. The dial tone rang in her ear.
The room turned quiet. She closed her eyes. She softly hung up the phone.
A few tears fell, cold and slow as she opened her eyes and looked at the receiver. She did not understand the sudden shift in his behavior.
Paul came over to console her, then her parents entered the room to see what was wrong.
"Donald. He said he doesn't ever want to talk to me again."
She’d never seen her dad so upset. His hands clenched, his lips tightened together over seeing her crying.
What made the whole thing confusing was that they had never officially begun to date again, the relationship, or whatever it had been, never being entirely clear.
At least she wouldn't be mystified anymore.
***
Raylee spent the rest of the break at two places. Canyon Beach, just thirty miles south of Silver Canyon, with her parents, where the weather was cool and breezy, a lot like camping out. They toasted marshmallows and hotdogs and huddled under blankets as they talked little and rested a lot.
And when Paul wasn’t working for his dad at the car dealership, she and Paul would hole up at the pizza place over in Waterman, talking about life or playing video games.
Raylee wished the break would last forever.
***
They were just getting to Something Wicked This Way Comes. Raylee was pleasantly surprised by Mrs. Adam’s decision to cover the novel.
Mrs. Adams spent the first half of class going over chapters one through five of Something Wicked This Way Comes. Then she instructed the class to break out into small groups, their choice.
Donald came up to Raylee’s desk. “Care to join me?"
“Why?" She was on the immediate defense.
“I’m sorry." His leg started twitching. She made a point to look at it dead-on.
“No, you’re not."
“You don’t understand, I had to. Ryan, David, they were putting pressure on me after the whole thing with Crystal." He scratched nervously at his knee.
“Oh, I understand. You’re a jerk."
Though she didn’t understand how someone could treat her so well and then act like she meant nothing because some stupid guys told him to.
“Excuse me. I need to find a group." She got up from her desk and joined Katy and another girl. Raylee kept her focus on the project. She wasn’t going to let Donald ruin Bradbury for her.
"What happened?" Katy asked.
Raylee shrugged. "I have no idea. I don't even know what was happening between us. Then, sud
denly, over break, he calls me up and says we can't talk anymore, then hangs up. Now, he's blaming Ryan and David."
" 'Thank God and Greyhound (he's gone)' ".
Raylee glanced at her questioningly.
"One of my mom's beloved country singers."
"Ah."
The dark fantasy turned out to be full of eerie enchantment. In their small groups, they created a class lesson. Raylee was busy doing her part of the outline.
Maybe it was because Crystal held such power over her that she focused on the passages she did. They seemed to speak outside of their fictional realm and into her reality.
"There are smiles and smiles; learn to tell the dark variety from the light".
A shiver rolled up her spine. Because Crystal's smile was not the friendly kind, it was the kind that sought to hurt others, of the "dark variety."
As they began to discuss one of the excerpts, a storm began to brew outside. Raylee’s head shot up as thunder pounded overhead. No rain came down, but lightning flickered in the distance. She looked back down at the opened page.
"You can't act if you don't know."
Again, that shiver rippled through her back. Bradbury's words were speaking truth from her own life.
The facts hadn't changed. The strange sensation that someone was waiting to hurt her, in a bad way, still lingered as much as her ignorance about who it was or why he or she would be.
There were so many names that popped into her head. People who treated her badly or who were unpredictable, who seemed intent on making her life miserable. Crystal, of course, was at the top of the list. But there was also Gina. Donald, with his sudden changing attitudes. Henry.
She thought she had known them well enough, but she hadn't, and she hadn't known how to "act", as the passage suggested, because she didn’t "know".
They all fooled her, embarrassed her, brought out an insecurity that she didn't even know existed. In the company of her parents, she felt loved, comforted, safe. She was happy there. But her list of people looked at her as though she was a joke, sneering, giggling, shaking their heads, rejecting her in some other way, until she herself was convinced that something about her must be wrong, that she wasn't good enough.
Not good enough for what?
Whenever she was in the presence of Crystal and Gina, she felt inadequate. It wasn't just that they knew how to look put together, it was the way they moved, sleekly, like prowling cats, with contained confidence and controlled satisfaction. Raylee could not fathom what such self-assurance must feel like.
But Henry set her on edge too. And now Donald, with his inconsistency.
It was irritating and troubling to be left in this murky state, where people's actions startled her, brought her to tears, and left her even more confused about who to trust.
Thunder rumbled again. Through the window, Crystal led her faithful clique across the schoolyard.
Why did this weather always seem portentous, occurring just as her nemesis materialized? She was beginning to feel like she was in one of those movies where the moments of suspense were perfectly timed, punctuated by stormy weather.
In a single file, the girls drew closer to the window. Crystal watched Raylee closely as though lining her up for a bull’s eye.
Raylee cringed and looked back to her open book. Suddenly, she didn’t feel so good about the fantasy nightmare they were reading, like it wasn't just fiction anymore.
When she glanced outside again, the girls were paused midstride with Crystal at the helm; she was having them practice a cheer for the upcoming basketball game. But she was facing the classroom, her gaze on her, and she lifted a long red fingernail, making a slashing motion across her neck as she locked eyes with Raylee.
Shuddering, Raylee wrenched her gaze from the window, paralyzed by fear. No way could Crystal’s motion literally mean a death threat, she was only doing it to freak her out. Nevertheless, Raylee had a hard time calming herself down and got Mrs. Adam’s permission to leave the classroom.
Out in the hall, Raylee leaned her head against the wall and drew in long deep breaths. Her whole body was shaking like a feather.
Abruptly, the walls shook underneath her. More thunder. She jumped.
Calm down. You have to calm down.
After a few minutes, her fear turned into vexation, and then anger. Why, after all this time, wouldn't Crystal leave her alone? Hadn’t she had enough fun? She had Ryan back. She'd made sure Raylee stayed away from the football players.
She'd accomplished her goals. Why did she still feel the need to torment her?
Tears sprang into her eyes; she swiftly wiped them away. She wasn’t going to cry. Not over Crystal or Donald, not over any of them.
Sniffing, she made her way to the bathroom where she checked her face. Using some toilet paper, she wiped away the tear stains on her cheeks, wiped at her nose, and pulled her shoulders back. At least she looked presentable.
You’re okay. Focus on your awesome English class.
Back in Mrs. Adam’s class, she managed to enjoy her part in the project. It helped that Katy was speaking in riddles that befuddled everyone around them but Raylee.
***
Spring rolled around, and with it came a sense of renewal.
Donald spoke less and less to her as though preparing for his move, when they would probably never see each other again. Crystal seemed to have forgotten Raylee existed. The rest of the clique acted just as uninterested in her.
She enjoyed the company of Katy and Paul, without the interference or confusion from anyone else.
Life seemed good. For a while.
Slamming the metal door, she slung her empty backpack over her shoulders and headed to lunch. She’d forgotten to bring money unfortunately. Katy nodded over to her, gesturing to the empty seat beside her.
A moment later, Crystal appeared, prancing across the room liked she owned it.
How did girls become like that? So confident, so in control? Not a care in the world? She tried repeating the mantra of self-comfort—You’re okay. You’re okay. You’re okay. But she couldn’t fool herself. Raylee didn’t know how to stand up to somebody like Crystal Jordan, and she didn’t know how to fight the emotions of insecurity and nervousness that overcame her when Crystal was near.
“You don’t have any friends, do you?" Some guy she’d never seen before stopped at her table, looked her up and down, and backed up into Crystal’s table behind her as though he’d just gotten close to a leper.
That was the third guy who said something about her in the last twenty minutes. She snuck a glance at the window next to her. Nothing notably appalling stood out about her appearance. Her hair was pulled back into a low ponytail, and since she didn’t wear makeup, she didn’t need to worry about any makeup mishaps. The white t-shirt she wore wasn’t stained and it hung on her the way it should.
Why do they insist on teasing me? Is my self-doubt that obvious?
Raylee didn’t know what to do or say, so she did and said nothing. But she felt awkward sitting there without anything to eat, so she pulled out the single notebook from her backpack and a pencil and began to write out the few Russian words she’d been studying at home, willing this whole day to go away.
Unfortunately, the feel of the room shifted instead. Kissy noises emanated from Crystal’s table followed by a round of heightened laughter. Though the hooting and hollering came only from Crystal’s small clan, the noise was loud enough to sound like it was coming from the whole school, and it might as well have been because the echo of their chuckling spread across the entire room.
“Skin-nee Pen-nee! Skin-nee Pen-nee!" A bunch of the girls began to chant.
Not again.
The nickname was trite, but something about it triggered an old insecurity that she thought had been banished.
Paul entered the room then, spotting her and Katy. Raylee considered staying but decided it would be best just to disappear altogether.
Stuffing the pencil and pad back into her bag, she kept her head down as she hurried out into the hall.
She passed by a handful of students, but for the most part, her walk was quiet.
Then she heard footsteps behind her. Not just a normal casual type of step, but deliberate heavy-footed steps, like someone in pursuit.
She stopped outside her chemistry class, hoping to find Mr. Rivers there. Instead, the lights were off and the door locked. The footsteps were heavier now, closer.
She squeezed her eyes shut and made fists with her hands, ready to defend herself if it came to it.
Opening her eyes, her hands ready for battle, she turned and gasped when she saw Henry quickly turning around, his long shadow disappearing from sight.
She leaned against the wall, watching until he disappeared into a classroom.
She couldn’t wait for the school year to be over.
FIFTEEN
Summer turned out be the much-needed break Raylee needed. At the beginning of it, Raylee, Katy, and Paul waited in line to buy tickets for Steven Spielberg's Jurassic Park. By the time they finally got into the theater, there was an electricity in the air as moviegoers before them exited the theater, their eyes wide and their hand motions lively as they exclaimed how good it was.
Feeling caught up in the excitement, the three of them headed to a row near the middle of the theater.
They'd never seen anything like it before. Realistic looking dinosaurs, exciting danger, a host of interesting characters. The movie ended up being one of the most enjoyable films she'd ever seen.
She spent a good chunk of the initial summer break going to the movies or the beach.
By the middle of summer, the temperature became nice and hot. Raylee and Paul found themselves hanging out at their favorite pizza place.
As Paul smacked a plastic hockey disc across the air board, he said, "Got a part time job helping an accountant. I mean, it's not a paid position, but it will give me the experience I need to learn the business side of car dealing."
"Oh, that's so cool." Raylee smacked the disc back to him, watching it slide straight into the sliver pocket.
