“What do you mean?” Cait kneed Patch to catch up with Jonas.
“I may be wrong at this distance, but I think I’ve seen this happen before.” He turned to look at Cait, his face bleak with despair. She wanted to ask more, but fear closed her throat. What did he mean? What had he seen? These were her father’s horses—livestock they needed to sell to keep the ranch. They had to be okay. Cait refused to consider any alternative.
When they crested the final rise, Cait gasped. She and Jonas reined in at the same time. The horses below were sick. A couple of them were on the ground, stretched out, but Cait didn’t think they were sleeping. The ones standing were stumbling worse than a cowpoke after a late night at the saloon.
“There’s the bay I worked with.” Cait pointed to the stallion as he approached another horse. He seemed to see the sorrel at the last minute and panicked, scrabbling back. He almost fell but stumbled off in another direction. “What is wrong with them?”
Cait nudged Patch a step closer to Jonas. She didn’t know why, but right now she needed the reassurance of his presence. “Do you know?” Without taking her eyes from the meandering horses, she reached over to touch Jonas’s arm. He caught her hand in his. The comfort of his large fingers surrounding her smaller ones almost made her sigh in relief. This couldn’t be as bad as it looked. With Jonas here, she could figure out what to do and fix these animals.
As he surveyed the horror in front of him, Jonas tamped down the urge to turn tail and run. Cait’s hand in his—something he’d longed for with every fiber of his being—became an anchor from the despair threatening to pull him so far down he’d never find his way back. Her green eyes, full of hope, gazed up at him with expectancy. She waited. Waited for something he couldn’t give her.
“What’s wrong with them, Jonas? Is it thirst?” Cait glanced around as if trying, by some miracle, to find an oasis in the middle of the drought-stricken countryside.
“It’s the locoweed.” The words cleaved the air between them, and Jonas prayed for a way that this wasn’t true. “They’ve been grazing on locoweed, Cait. See?” He pointed to the scrubby plants with the gray-green leaves. Cait’s grip on his hand tightened to the point of pain.
“How do you know?” Her freckles stood in stark relief across her pale cheeks.
“I’ve seen this before. The stumbling. The erratic gait. The startled fear. They’re all signs of locoweed poisoning.” Jonas knew her next question and wanted to cover his ears.
“What can we do for them?” Determination shooed the horror from her face. Her mouth firmed. Her shoulders straightened. “Let’s get them back to the ranch. Papa will know what to do.”
“That’s easier said than done.” Jonas wished he could rub away the knot in his stomach. “At this point any little thing will startle them. There is no way to move this herd with just the two of us. We’ll have to go back for help.”
“But the others are sick.” Cait’s brow furrowed as she turned to him. “We have to do this.”
“Cait, you have to understand the horses who have been here longest may need to be put down. There’s no real cure for the poison.”
Her mouth thinned further. Fire flashed in her eyes. “No. We need these horses. They’re already promised to the cavalry.” She pulled her hand free. Her fists clenched as if she would fight this beast, locoweed, all on her own.
“We need to go down and assess which ones will be able to make the trip back to the ranch, and get started. This could take some time.” Jonas lifted the reins to urge his horse forward. Beside him Cait did the same. He couldn’t shake off the dread building inside him as they approached the sick animals.
Two of the horses were so far gone even Cait admitted they would never recover. Jonas retrieved his rifle and put them out of their misery, an action that tore at his heart. He knew these horses, had worked with them, cared for them.
When he fired the shots, several of the other animals startled, running in erratic circles. Jonas didn’t know if they would ever recover enough for the cavalry to use them. He’d heard tales of horses taking months, even years, to get over the effects of locoweed. Some never did.
“The bay and that roan seem to be the best.” Jonas gestured at the pair that stood close to one another and were less agitated. “Why don’t we try to get them back to the barn? If your dad and the other men are recovered enough, they can come help us get the rest home.”
Cait nodded. Her cheeks were gaunt with grief. He could tell she’d never seen the results of horses consuming locoweed before. This had been a hard awakening to the dangers of drought, when the only graze that survived the lack of water would kill the animal that ate it.
The trip back took over twice the time the ride out had taken. The horses spooked, stumbled, and sometimes fought the leads for no reason. Back at the barn, Jonas and Cait shooed the pair into an empty corral. They both drank deep at the water trough and then huddled in the shade of the wall.
Cait checked on her father, while Jonas checked on the other hands. He was leaning on the corral fence talking with the men when he heard heavy footfalls behind him. Jonas knew without turning that it was Angus.
“What’s this I hear about you shooting two of my horses?” Angus sounded a bit shaky but stood tall. Only the beads of sweat dotting his upper lip and the tightness of his jaw gave away his discomfort. Jonas didn’t say a word as Angus leaned against the top rail to peruse the pair in the corral. A swallow flew from the rafters, swooped down and away. The bay and his companion snorted, heads raised, whites of their eyes showing. They stumbled into one another in their fear and almost fell.
“Ahhh.” Angus lowered his brow to his arm. He straightened to look at Jonas. “If these two are the best of the lot, we’ll have to put them all down. This is hopeless.”
“No.” Cait’s cry startled them all. “You can’t do that. Jonas, tell him.” Her eyes were wide with pleading. At that moment, Jonas would have promised her the world.
“Tell him they’ll recover.” The agony in her voice ripped his already shredded heart.
“She could be right.” Jonas prayed this would be true. “We have to give them a chance. If they haven’t been eating too much of the locoweed, time and good feed, lots of water, might flush the poison from their system.”
“Papa, we have to try.” Cait placed her palm on her father’s sleeve. Jonas didn’t know how Angus could resist that luminous gaze and imploring expression. “We need these horses when Lawson comes. If we bring them home and give them care for the next two weeks, we’ll see where they are then.”
“And if they don’t recover?” Angus’s shoulders drooped. “You know we stand to lose the ranch, Cait.”
“That’s why we have to try.” Moisture glittered in Cait’s eyes. Jonas fought the urge to pull her into his arms and comfort her. Although he felt he’d gotten closer to her today, he didn’t want to jeopardize their growing friendship. He wanted to marry Cait. For marriage—a lifetime with her—he would be patient.
“Let’s mount up and bring the horses home.” Angus and the hands turned toward the barn.
Cait turned to Jonas, her smile rivaling the sun for warmth. “Thank you.” She leaned close and kissed him on the cheek before hurrying to get a fresh horse.
Jonas froze. He could feel the imprint of her lips on his skin. His heart thrummed. Oh, God, please make this right. Help me with Cait. Help them keep the ranch. Help these horses survive. Jonas strode toward the barn to get ready. He wasn’t sure God could answer what he’d just asked, but he’d try to have faith and trust in the impossible.
Chapter 7
The afternoon sun beat down on him as Jonas tried to keep the pair of horses he herded from bolting yet again. His shirt stuck to his back, and he smelled worse than a barn full of muck after a long winter. He could see Cait leaning forward, sagging in the saddle. She looked as exhausted as he felt. Exhausted and discouraged.
He tugged on his horse’s reins to slow down and wai
t for Angus to catch up to him. Before Angus could speak, they both glanced at Cait.
“I think she might be able to hear a pin drop on a barn floor in town, but even Cait can’t hear us from this distance.” Angus’s grimace cracked the dirt caked on his cheeks.
“Long as we don’t shout.” Jonas couldn’t help wishing Cait had stayed at the house. He might love her determination and spunk, but at times like this, he hated seeing her heartbroken.
“I know Caitie wants us to save these horses, but what do you think their chances are? I heard your old boss had a run-in with locoweed last year. How many head was he able to save?” Angus pinned Jonas with an unwavering gaze. Jonas knew he had to give the straight truth and not pretty it up.
“If I remember right”—Jonas paused, knowing they both were aware he wouldn’t soon forget such a horrific event—“he saved maybe five head of stock out of the twenty-five who were poisoned.”
Angus blew out a hard breath. “How many of those recovered completely?”
“Good enough to ride?” Jonas waited until Angus nodded affirmative. “I think only two of them. The others never got past the fear stage. They would startle at nothing—a breeze, a rustle in the brush, water flowing over the rocks in a creek. They would go into a frenzy and even fall down.”
As if hearing his words, the horses in front of him threw up their heads, eyes wide, and attempted to run. The sorrel stumbled into the pinto and they both went to their knees. Angus began to croon a melody. Jonas joined in but didn’t have high hopes that the soothing song would help.
Back on their feet, the two trembled and didn’t seem to know how to proceed. With help from Angus, Jonas got them moving again.
“You can expect them to act like this for a time yet. Some of them suffer from blindness, colic, or diarrhea. They sweat a lot and don’t seem to remember where they’re going or how to get there.” Jonas loosened his canteen for a sip of water. “I can’t tell you how sorry I am that this happened to your animals. You have some of the best horses in California. It’s a shame to lose them.”
“Cait’s worked hard with these animals.” Angus lifted his hat for a moment, his sweat-soaked hair plastered to his head. “I think she wants to save this ranch almost more than I do.”
Jonas knew the truth of that statement. When Cait loved something, she threw her heart into it. She loved her horses, her family, and this ranch. One day, he hoped she would love him with the same devotion.
“How’s the suit going? Making any progress?” Angus kept his voice low, his eyes on Cait. Jonas knew he referred to their deal when he came to work here. Angus had agreed to give Jonas another chance to woo Cait.
“She isn’t as antagonistic. She even seems to accept some of what I say.” Jonas chose his words with care. He didn’t want to give Angus unwarranted hope.
“She’ll come around.” Angus nudged his gelding to the side to bring a meandering animal back in line. “I don’t think she’s ever gotten over her feelings for you. That’s why she was so angry with you. What you did with Keira, her sister, was a fool thing.”
“I see that now.” Jonas shook his head. Trying to fool Cait into loving him had backfired worse than he could have imagined. He prayed God could make this right, because he sure didn’t know what to do.
By the time they had all the horses corralled, the sun had dipped below the horizon, painting the small clouds in shades of pink fading to purple. Jonas tilted his head back to study the artwork. He closed his eyes.
“Sleeping on your feet?” Cait’s sweet voice wrapped around him.
“No, I was thanking God for giving me this moment after a difficult day.” Jonas studied Cait’s upturned face. Her face was crusted with as much dirt as the rest of them, but on her the sweat trails couldn’t detract from her beauty.
“You can thank God after what happened today?” Cait’s forehead furrowed. She didn’t sound angry, just puzzled.
“The Bible says to ‘count it all joy’ when you face various trials, and also we’re to always give thanks. I don’t know why this happened, but I do know if I trust God and give Him time, He’ll teach me something that I need to know.” As he said the words, Jonas wondered if he truly meant them. Did he trust God as he should?
Tears welled in Cait’s eyes. Jonas hadn’t meant to make her cry. He couldn’t help but reach out to pull her close. Instead of fighting him, she leaned against him. Her slight frame trembled. He tightened his hold.
Cait couldn’t recall anything ever feeling so good. Jonas. His arms around her. Solid. Strong. Steadfast. More comforting than she’d ever imagined. She wanted to stay close to him and not pull away. But if she stayed here, she would cry. And Cait did not want to cry. She stiffened her spine and stepped away from the best comfort she’d ever experienced.
The pull to leap back into his embrace almost overwhelmed her. Cait called on every bit of resolve she had. “I’d better check Poppy and her baby and then get cleaned up for supper.” The knot in her throat ached as she started to turn away.
“Cait.” Jonas’s hand on her arm burned a path to her heart as she felt the compassion in his touch. “Don’t shut me out, Cait. Let me walk with you. Talk to me.”
She stared at the cracked ground, wishing her eyes reflected that dryness. Tears welled up and she blinked, trying to keep them from falling. She failed. A single tear dripped onto her cheek. Cait swept her face over her shoulder. The dirt would smear, but that didn’t matter now.
“Ah, Cait.” Jonas tugged her to him. Sheltered in his arms, she barely knew when he led her to a bench in the shade of the barn. They sank down together, Cait cradled against his side.
“I know you’re discouraged and scared, Cait.” Jonas’s low voice rumbled in his chest. With her head tucked against his shoulder, Cait could feel the vibration.
“You’re afraid your dad will lose the ranch. And the horses. You’re afraid of what will happen. Change is never easy, especially when you are content where you are. But, Cait, trust me; God has something special for you. He loves you more than you can ever imagine. He wants to give you good things, and all He asks is that you give your life to Him. That you believe in your heart that Jesus gave His life for you.”
The words wound around inside Cait, a litany of phrases melding with others she’d heard in the past. Could this be true? Did God simply want her to surrender her life to Him? Could she trust Him with her life? All of it?
“It’s hard.” She wasn’t sure Jonas heard her soft words. “It’s hard to let go.” Her head ached almost as much as her heart. “I don’t even know how.”
“What seems so hard is really pretty easy.” Jonas ran his thumb in circles on her shoulder. “All you have to do is believe in Jesus and ask Him to take over.”
“But, I’ve done so much wrong.” Cait pressed the heel of her hand against her eye. “What if He doesn’t want me?”
“Cait, God knows everything you’ve ever done, or thought. He still loves you and wants you to choose Him. He wouldn’t extend the offer if He didn’t want you. He loved me and forgave me, and look how I used to be.”
Jonas pressed a kiss to her brow. Her brow covered in dirt and dried sweat. Cait thought about how Jonas cared for her. He wasn’t concerned with her imperfections but cared for her anyway. Did God feel the same way? Did He love her despite the dirt in her life: the petty jealousies, the harsh words she’d spoken, all the mean thoughts she’d had? Could she trust God as she’d come to trust Jonas? With her dreams? Her heart? Her life?
Oh, Lord, I’m sorry for all I’ve done wrong. Mostly, I’m sorry for not loving You. Jesus, please take my life. I know it’s not much to offer, but I’m Yours if You want me. Tears ran down her cheeks to drip off her chin. Cait paid no attention but continued to pray and talk with God. With her ear against his chest, she could hear a low rumble as Jonas prayed for her.
The clang of the dinner bell startled Cait. She scrambled to her feet, swiping at her eyes. “I probably look scary en
ough to keep chickens from laying eggs.”
“No worse than any of us who were out all day.” Jonas squeezed her shoulder. “Let’s head for the pump and wash up. Angus won’t appreciate us holding up his supper.”
The cool water felt good. Cait couldn’t remember a time when she’d felt so clean—inside and out. She batted the dust from her clothing, rinsed her hands again, and walked toward the house with Jonas. In the shade of the house, she stopped him. The look in his warm brown eyes had her fumbling for the words she wanted to say. Her tongue didn’t seem to work.
“You okay?” Jonas cupped her cheek with his palm. Cait wanted to lean into the warmth, but she had things to say and feared she would forget everything.
“Thank you.” She settled for simple. “I may not look different on the outside, but there’s something new on the inside. I don’t think I can explain it to you.” She struggled to find the words.
“You don’t have to say anything, Cait. I’ve been there, too. I remember the day I gave my life to Jesus and the changes in me. There are no words to explain. You’ve helped me a lot today, though. Thank you.”
“I’ve helped you?” Cait frowned. “How have I helped you?”
“You’ve reminded me of that fresh love for God. How wonderful that is.” He stepped closer. “Sometimes in the everyday trials of life, it’s easy to forget how much God loves you, or to take Him for granted.”
He brought his other hand up to cup her face. Cait’s heart pounded. Her lips parted as Jonas leaned down. The intensity in his gaze was more than she could look on. Her eyes drifted shut. The soft brush of his lips against hers deepened to more as he wrapped his arms around her and dragged her against him. For the second time that day, Cait gave her heart away.
Chapter 8
The sorrel’s sides hardened as Jonas tugged the cinch tight. Jonas kneed the horse’s belly to get him to release the air and grinned. Grinned. He’d been doing that a lot these past two weeks since he’d kissed Cait. Kissed Cait and she hadn’t slapped him. In fact, he was pretty sure she enjoyed the kiss as much as he had. Since then he’d been walking on air. Maybe he did have a chance to win her heart.
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