by Beam, Brian
“You understand so little,” he accused, his tone malicious. Do you really think that prophecy will serve you, that you can stop this? Stop me? You do not have the strength. This is far beyond the weakness of mortals.”
“I don’t understand,” I admitted, my heart pounding in fear.
“This world will bow to me,” my father continued, ignoring my response. Once again, his face and crown flickered so quickly that I wasn’t even sure it had actually happened. “You will not stop me. You cannot stop me. You are weak. Fragile. You are . . .”
****
“ . . .quite possibly the most dull-witted idiot I have ever known,” a raspy voice finished as consciousness seeped back into my body.
My eyelids fluttered, the world seeming to vacillate between complete darkness and scattered pinpoints of light. Groggily, I turned my head to see a burning campfire. Its orange glow revealed that I was wrapped tightly in a wool blanket. I couldn’t feel the warmth of the blanket or the fire, nor could I feel the cold of the night on my exposed face. I was completely numb.
Memories of my encounter with Briscott started to creep into the forefront of my thoughts. First I remembered our fight, and then I remembered going into the lake after him. With my arms immobilized within the blanket, I tried to sit up using my stomach muscles. Dizziness washed over me, and I promptly fell back. I had to close my eyes to stop the world from spinning. It didn’t work.
“Do not try to get up again,” Max’s voice commanded from beside me. I let my head lull towards the fire again, this time seeing that Max was curled up on a blanket next to me. “Now that I know you will not be comatose for the rest of your life, I am going to sleep. I suggest that you do the same.”
“Where’s Briscott?” I asked hoarsely, my throat not wanting to work correctly just yet.
“Ithan is watching over him. He should be okay after some rest, the same as you. So get some sleep,” Max responded in annoyance.
“What happened? Why can’t I feel anything?”
Max huffed loudly. “You cannot feel anything because Ithan used magic to temporarily deaden your superficial nerves. Otherwise, you would be in a world of hurt right now. I suggested we let you suffer for your foolhardy actions, but you need rest, so I relented. At least I learned a new spell in the process. Ithan says it will wear off by morning.
“As for what happened, pulling you from the water was a simple task, once you stopped moving. If you had just listened to me in the first place, I could have retrieved Briscott while you stayed comfortable and dry on land. Furthermore, Ithan and I would not be completely worn out from saving the both of you. His insufferable owl would likely be in a little better shape as well.”
“Max, I—”
“You could have died or damaged your brain,” Max scolded. “You cannot take such risks, Korin. You are too important.” Max exhaled forcefully. “Lunkhead.”
Properly put in my place, I stared into the star-laden sky, considering what I’d done. If Raijom’s prophecy truly was symbolic of my threat to him, then I could’ve easily ended that threat without him even having to lift a finger. Everything I’d survived would’ve all been for nothing. Prophecy aside, Max was right; no matter how noble my intentions, my actions had been idiotic.
Max’s irritation obviously stemmed from his concern for me. Though he was undoubtedly concerned about stopping Raijom as well, I could tell from the look in his eyes that he’d feared losing me. I knew that feeling all too well.
“I’m sorry, Max,” I apologized sincerely.
“Apology accepted. Sleep,” he muttered sleepily.
“Goodnight, Max,” I returned, still staring up at the stars. I knew sleep wasn’t going come easy with all the thoughts running through my head. The nightmare I’d woken from wasn’t going to help either.
Eventually my thoughts drifted to Sal’. At first, I brooded over her betrothal and the fact that we could never be together, as I so often did during those days. But then I found myself remembering her beautiful face, her winsome smile, and her melodic laughter. I thought about how wonderful a person she was, about the quality of her heart and spirit.
The weight of the world disappeared, replaced with pleasant dreams.
****
My eyes opened to meet the purplish glow of the coming dawn. Pain bloomed across my face and speared through my limbs; it wasn’t the first time Max had left me reminders of my own stupidity. Ithan’s magic had finally dissipated, leaving me to fully experience those reminders. The cold air was invigorating, though it cut glaringly across my face. Through my swollen nose, I smelled the sharp scent of woodsmoke.
I achingly sat up, the blanket having loosened around me during the night. As I stretched my aching arms, I noticed Briscott sitting nearby before a small fire, a wool blanket drawn tightly around his body. He poked at the fire with a stick, stoking the embers to keep it ablaze. He hadn’t seemed to notice my waking.
Max was still sleeping soundly on a blanket beside me. I didn’t see Ithan, indicating he was probably on watch. That left me wondering what I should do.
Before I could think too hard about it, Briscott grunted, “Morning, Korin.” His sunken eyes remained fixed on the fire. “Come sit with me, please.” The “please,” diametric to his scornful tone, caught my attention.
When I didn’t immediately stand, his reddened eyes lifted to where I sat. “It’s okay. I just want to talk.”
Grabbing my blanket and draping it around my shoulders, I found myself approaching the fire. I was still in the same clothes I’d been wearing the previous night, though they were now bone dry. There was no snow falling from the sky, but a layer of frost covered the ground, giving the grass a silvery glow.
Sorely, I sat across the fire from Briscott, putting some cautious distance between us. My gut told me that he had no plans of doing anything malicious, but a little carefulness wouldn’t hurt.
Briscott was highlighted with a soft orange glow, shadows playing across his face from the flickering flames between us. His eyes lacked the spark that I’d seen in them ever since the day we’d first met. They were simply lifeless. The right one was also blackened and puffy, matching the wicked bruise on his chin. I felt guilty for his injuries, though I sported several from him as well.
Briscott’s entire body trembled under his blanket. Even with the cold, his shivering was a little too violent. Ellifil withdrawal was most likely to blame. I didn’t know what I could do for him, so I just sat there, silent, unsure of what to say to the friend whom I’d come to blows with the night before.
“Ithan fell asleep while watching me,” Briscott explained, his rough tone softening. He gestured with a jerk of his head in the direction of our tethered horses. It was still too dark for me to make out anything more than shadows there. “I don’t believe he meant to fall asleep, but with how much we put him and Max through last night, I’m not surprised. I woke up not long ago and couldn’t get back to sleep, so I figured I’d wait for you to wake so we could talk.”
“Okay,” I replied, not knowing what to expect from him. His lack of cursing made me wary for some reason. Maybe because it seemed so unnatural for him.
Briscott continued to poke at the fire as we sat in awkward silence. I debated whether or not to speak of what I suspected to be the reason I’d been driven to draw my sword on him, but I couldn’t make myself speak.
“Thank you for coming after me,” Briscott stated, finally breaking the silence. His eyes didn’t meet mine. “Even after what I did.”
“You had your reasons,” I replied, scooting closer to the fire now that I was a little more confident that our talk would be cordial. “I’m sorry I didn’t realize how much pain you were really in before last night.”
Briscott shook his head vehemently. “No. Please don’t apologize, Korin. The blame rests solely on my own shoulders. I was masking my emotions with ellifil to the point that I didn’t even realize the blighted pain I was in.”
My lips twitched
into a small smile. There’d been a hint of the old Briscott in his voice.
“Do you remember when I said that I volunteered to have the rock put in my chest?” Briscott questioned soberly.
I nodded, curious of why he’d bring up the topic again.
“I was telling you the truth, if not of the whole it. In all honesty, I considered taking my life after losing my wife and children.” Briscott stopped and swallowed loudly before continuing. “But I was scared that my soul would be sent to Rizear’s blighted domain, never to reunite with them.”
Briscott’s eyes took on a faraway look. “When Jefren wanted to test that rock . . . I saw it as a means of distraction from my pain. I thought that maybe if someone else had control over me, then the pain—the hurt—wouldn’t be so overwhelming. I know now how little sense that makes, but grief can make you do stupid things—things like drawing a knife on a good friend.” Briscott winced at his own words and started absently poking at the fire. Glowing embers danced through the air.
“Briscott, I . . .” I didn’t know what to say as I watched tears start to cut lines down his dirtied face and into his beard.
Briscott held up the hand that had been under the blanket and shook his head, keeping me from having to say anything. His other hand trembled so intensely that I thought he’d lose his grip on the stick. “Obviously, you’ve seen that the rocks do nothing to quell your emotions. When Kaitlyne gave me my first dose of ellifil, however, I felt at peace for the first time since my family . . .” Briscott wiped at each eye with the heel of his palm. “It was the only way I could cope, Korin. The only way I can cope.”
“Look, Briscott—” I was cut off once again by a lifting of his hand.
“You were right to stop me,” Briscott continued, staring into the fire. “If I keep running from everything, it will not truly be me avenging my family. Instead, it will be that other Diatheze-blighted fellow, the one who’s numb to the world as I merely watch through his eyes.” Diatheze is the god of delusions.
“Besides, I’m not the only one hurting through all of this. The pressure that must be weighing you down right now . . . you didn’t deserve what I brought upon you last night. I’m the one who should be sorry, and I am. Please forgive me.” His gaze lifted to me, pleading.
For a moment, I just sat there, letting Briscott’s words sink in. I still felt that I should be the one apologizing, but he’d already instisted that I didn’t. So instead, I simply stood and walked over to him, extending a hand.
“Of course you’re forgiven,” I assured him.
Briscott stood, ignoring my hand to pull me into an embrace. I threw my arms around him and let him cry into my shoulder, his body wracking with sobs and withdrawl tremors.
Briscott eventually took a step back and wiped at his eyes. He let out a small chuckle. While it wasn’t as rich or sincere as what I was used to from him, I could tell there was some honest happiness behind it. “Seems I’m making a blighted fool of myself.”
I gave him a sympathetic smile, happy that he was able to dredge up a little humor despite everything. “I guess I can forgive you for that, too.”
Briscott actually laughed at that, but I knew he still had a long road to getting back to his old self. Then again, I didn’t know if his old self—as I knew it, at least—was really his true self or not. The ellifil may have turned him into an entirely different person. When I’d taken it just once, I’d acted far differently than normal.
Silence settled around us once again. The sky was starting to lighten to a pale red as the sun peeked over the eastern horizon. We needed to get moving as soon as possible to take full advantage of the daylight hours.
“I better wake the others,” I announced.
“I’ll get Ithan and some food from our provisions,” Briscott replied, clapping my shoulder.
Responding with a nod, I turned to go rouse Max. Only a couple steps forward, a sudden throught struck me. I reached to my belt to find that the ellifil vial was amazingly still tucked behind it and intact. “Briscott,” I called. Briscott stopped and turned at the sound of his name. I quickly closed the distance between us with the vial in my hand.
Briscott ran a tremulous hand through his hair, brushing it back from his face. “Yes?”
“Here,” I said, offering him the vial. Briscott let me drop it into his hand. His reddened eyes narrowed in confusion. “You were right about me not understanding,” I explained. “I can’t imagine how you must feel. You are capable of your own choices. Who am I to try to take that choice away from you?”
Briscott brought his eyes up to mine. They were filled with complete and utter resolve. He dropped the vial to the ground and crushed it beneath his boot. “I’ve made my choice,” he avowed.
With a smile, I watched Briscott walk away and then went to wake up Max.
Chapter 37
Back to Normal-ish
I quickly learned that Briscott’s recovery was going to entail much more than a single violent outburst followed by an apology and a few tremors. Even though Briscott had seemed fairly calm and collected the morning of our talk, he was still prone to spontaneous bouts of anger and irritability over the next three days of our travels.
Sometimes Briscott would overreact to seemingly minor issues, such as spilling water on himself due to withdrawal-induced hand tremors. These episodes typically passed quickly, culminating in some senseless screaming.
Other times, he’d become overly defensive, usually after misreading even the most innocuous of comments as insults. These instances also led to screaming, but usually included some sort of aggressive, physical response as well. For example, Ithan found himself being shoved off of Windmane for informing Briscott that his shirt had a rip across its back. Thankfully, Ithan wasn’t hurt, but he kept Windmane a goodly distance from Briscott’s mare for the next few days.
At his worst, Briscott attempted to strangle me because he thought I was hiding his last vial of ellifil. Max and Ithan put a stop to his attack by binding him with air while I calmly explained—well, as calmly as I could after having a a throat-crushing attempt made on my life—that Briscott had smashed the vial himself.
After each outburst, Briscott would let loose a profuse stream of apologies. His apologies led him to tears, which led to recollections of his lost family, which led to more tears, and finally ended with the potential for another violent breakdown. Needless to say, it was a very trying time for all of us.
Once those first three days passed, Briscott no longer suffered from tremors or violent outbursts, though he was still clearly stricken with emotional pain. He remained withdrawn, completely silent and beyond our ability to reach. Each night, he ventured out alone to shoot his bow for hours at a time. Ithan and I grew closer during those nights, trading life stories along with Max after setting up camp.
Our days were spent discussing what we’d do once we reached Gualain, though without knowing exactly what we were to face, forming a solid plan was impossible. We agreed that finding Sal’ came first—hopefully with her Wizard Guard retinue intact. After we found her, Ithan would depart to reunite with his family in Bard’s Crossing while the rest of us attempted to figure out who was behind the rocks, how we would find them, and how we would stop them. Basically, our hours upon hours of planning came down to winging it.
Ithan assured me that Sal’ was still alive, claiming that the connection between her ring and Saiyre’s would’ve dissipated had either of them died. Whether Ithan’s assertion was true or not, I was grateful for his considerate attempt at keeping me from worrying about Sal’s safety. I still dwelled on her well-being and the fact that she was betrothed to Saiyre anyway.
****
Raftin, the first town we encountered after setting out from Oliph’s Monolith, was a few days travel into the kingdom of Naolim. It was a small, simple town made up of thatch-roofed wooden houses. Even so, we were thankful for the chance to restock our supplies, take warm baths, and have soft beds to sleep in for the n
ight. I even got my hands on some nice leather gloves to help deal with the winter cold.
We learned that Naolim’s king had dedicated the kingdom’s armies to the war, and that word had already spread about the Grand Wizard’s deployment of the Wizard Guard. The townsfolk in Raftin were perceptibly uneasy, fearing that these were signs that the war would soon spread beyond Gualain’s borders. Many had already migrated west in anticipation of the war ultimately consuming their town.
While in Raftin, I kept a close watch over Briscott at all times to make sure he didn’t fall back on old habits. In the town’s only inn, I shared one of its two rooms with Briscott, while Max and Ithan shared the second. Aside from preventing a relapse, we figured my presence would help pull Briscott out of his recent solitudinous tendencies.
During our one night in Raftin, as the hour grew late, Briscott became restless. I tried to keep his thoughts distracted by staying up and talking with him in the candlelight of our austere room. We mainly spoke of happier times and memories. Briscott’s loving recollections of his days with his family made me wonder if I’d live to ever know the joys that had been so cruelly taken from him.
Hours into our conversation, Briscott looked down to the nub of the tapered candle resting on the nightstand, appearing surprised at the evidence of passed time. “Korin, I’d like to thank you. I know watching over me as if I were a blighted newborn isn’t exactly what you need on this trip, but without you here, I don’t think I’d be able to stop myself from getting my hands on more ellifil,” he explained, turning his forlorn eyes away as if shamed.
“I’m glad to have been able to help,” I responded with a smile. I stretched my arms and gave a tired yawn. “We should probably go ahead and get some sleep, though. We’ll be starting out early.”
