by Ella Maven
All that for me.
A waste.
They hadn’t bothered to chain me up again, probably assuming I was too injured to be any harm. That was a mistake. The females said us Drixonians healed fast, and compared to them, we did. Naomi would carry those bruises for several rotations. Those cuts even longer. Their thin skin couldn’t take many injuries. But us Drixonians were born for battle.
We carried scars though. Many. Our scales could knit themselves back together quickly, but it wasn’t pretty. Drak carried a nasty gash across his throat, and the left side of my face was a crisscross of lines like tree roots. The injury, sustained during an explosion during the Uprising, should have killed me. Instead I woke up with a flecked-up face and a cracked horn while a healer shot me so full of medis I hadn’t been able to think straight for two rotations.
I cheated death. That should have been it for me. I was the one who set off the explosion, fully expecting to be a victim to it… Along with hundreds of Uldani and thousands of Kulks. Instead I woke up and now I was just on borrowed time.
We’d done it though. That had been during our last advance, when we’d pushed the Uldani back to the main city, Alazar, and where they now stayed. Or were supposed to stay. Instead they were here, once again encroaching on our territory. I was sure they hated how much they needed us to protect themselves. Their time would have been better spent developing better armor for their own soldiers and training them to defend themselves. But they preferred their soft, weak life behind walls and employing other races to die for their protection.
Fleck that.
I wouldn’t die for them. I’d die for me. For Naomi. For my brothers. For the right to continue our race.
Naomi hadn’t said a word to me since I confessed my plan. She sat on the far side of the cell with her knees pulled to her chest, facing straight ahead with a blank look on her face.
Despite the ache in my ribs, I stood up with a moan and tested my body. Pain was everywhere, but it had lessened to a dull throb. I could deal with that. While I bent to the side, something soft hit me in the thigh. I frowned down at the ground where a pouch of qua lay. I raised a nubbed brow at Naomi, who now had my leather bundle in her hand, the one I’d put in my bike bags. With her face scrunched in anger, she pitched that at me too, hitting me in the chest. Then with a huff, she purposefully turned and faced the wall.
I picked up the qua. “You need to drink—”
“I already drank some,” she snapped. “You’re the one who nearly died just now, so you drink.”
“I didn’t nearly die—”
“Drink the damn qua, Gar!” she shouted, whipping her head to face me. Her long dark hair, pulled back in a braid, slapped the wall, and her eyes blazed. “Drink and eat. I’m sorry your last meal isn’t exciting, but that’s what you get for going off on this stupid-ass mission.”
I’d never heard her raise her voice. I’d never heard her use those words the humans called swear words.
“Na—”
“Don’t,” she said through clenched teeth as she rose to her feet. “You never talked to me back at the clavas. I’m not sure why you have to now. A day ago, I would have soaked up any scrap of attention you gave me, but now it’s too late. I’m not going to give you any more of my heart now that you’re committed to dying for your cause.”
“It’s not my cause,” I growled. “It’s for the rest of the Drix and for you, the females—”
“I didn’t ask you to die for me!” she shouted. “The only thing I ever wanted from you was some sort of sign that you tolerated my presence. Why am I worth dying for when you can’t even look at me?”
I hadn’t known this Naomi existed, this brave little hellion who yelled and challenged me. And now that I knew she had this in her, I wanted her even more.
“I can’t look at you,” I snarled as I stalked toward her. She didn’t back down, only tilted her chin up as I approached. “Because when I do all I can think about is that you’re everything I can’t have.”
Her expression immediately shifted, like the sun’s rays appearing from behind a cloud. All anger fled from her pretty features as her mouth gaped and her eyes widened. “Me?”
“You.” The answer felt like blades slicing into my gums.
“But… I don’t … Why?”
I turned away from her because the warmth of her body scrambled my brain. “Why what?”
“Why can’t you … have me?”
That wasn’t the question I thought she’d ask. I swallowed; my throat dry. “Because I will not be given a mate.”
I didn’t bother to tell her I knew Fatas had not blessed us to be cora-eternals. I’d already killed the Uldani who spilled her blood and cut her lip. He’d been one of the bodies who’d dropped at my feet in this room. My wrists held no loks, which were the permanent markings that appeared when I killed the one responsible for drawing my mate’s blood. If Naomi was my cora-eternal, she would have had matching loks.
As suspected, Fatas would never give me a mate, let alone a cora-eternal. I pushed aside the disappointment and told myself it was better she wasn’t my cora-eternal. This way she wouldn’t have to be subjected to my aura. I didn’t even want to live with my brain. When my twin Mave died, half of me did too, and it resurfaced as a cruel, wicked thing that lived on bloodlust.
Silence met my statement, until her voice came again, softer now. More the Naomi I’d always known. “What do you mean?”
“Fatas has other plans for me.”
“How do you know—”
“I know,” I growled.
Her teeth clacked shut.
“I know,” I repeated. I had visions. Dreams. I refused to share that with anyone, let alone Naomi.
Her hand settled on my back, warm and so incredibly soft. Her fingers moved, tracing a line I knew was a scar I’d received in a long-ago battle with a Pliken while I worked for the Uldani.
“Well, I refuse to believe that.” Her voice shook. “I think you have a greater purpose than dying for me.”
I closed my eyes. Didn’t she understand? I was a Drixonian warrior. Dying for her was the greatest honor I could ever hope to achieve. My family line would carry on with Ward, and that was the way it should be. He was the best out of the living Garundums. The best out of all of us died in my arms after suffering for far too long.
Heat blanketed my back, and little hands rested on the side of my waist. I felt a tickle along my back and opened my eyes as something warm pressed right against my spine. Heat raced through my body and my fingers twitched. I slowly turned my head and glanced over my shoulder to see Naomi pressed against my back, her lips dropping a gentle kiss to the nastiest of the scars on my back.
My cora pounded, and a roaring sound rushed through my ears just as she tilted her head back, brown eyes like liquid, and smiled. A longing sparked in me, sharp and hot, stronger than the charged rod the Uldani had slammed into my side. What would it be like to wake up to that smile? To roll over in my furs and see her creamy shoulder bared, knowing I’d pleasured her the night before until she fell asleep full of me? I’d never dared to let myself want and dream. That was why I stayed away from her, but now there was no escaping, no getting away from the sight of her looking up at me like I was her hero, her everything.
I had to act now—get her safe and complete my job before I changed my mind and flecked this all up. I had always been strong; my willpower unmatched. Naomi reduced me to a welf pup. If I let this go on any longer, I’d be following her with my tongue out, wagging my tail, and begging for attention.
A banging came from outside our cell, and I went still. Naomi plastered herself against me, but now she trembled, and a small squeak left her lips. All those warm feelings in my gut vanished as I remembered who I was and my purpose. These Uldani continually underestimated what we’d do for our females.
“Qua for the human,” said a deep voice just as a lock turned and a small flap opened in the bottom of the door. Just as a hand reac
hed through with a jug of qua, I grabbed the wrist and yanked. Hard.
A loud crashing of armor sounded on the other side of the door as the Kulk’s body collided with the solid metal followed by a garbled cry of pain. I yanked again, then again, until a thud echoed from the other side. Pulling my lips back into the best grin I could manage, I reached through the opening to snag the key card from the unconscious Kulk’s fingers.
Shouts sounded outside, and I knew more soldiers had heard the commotion. That was to be expected. There was no stealthy way to get out of the cell without them knowing, and if there was, I didn’t have time to figure it out. We had to run for it now, before reinforcements arrived. I swiped the card through the door, and it swung open. After snatching the qua pouch, jug, and the leather bundle of food off the floor, I picked up a stunned Naomi and threw her over my shoulder.
She made a noise of protest, but I didn’t have time to stop and tell her my plans. I was already doing them. I leapt over the Kulk’s body, hearing him groan as he came awake, and I listened. The shouts and approaching footsteps were coming from the left, so I went right and took off at a dead sprint down the dirt-walled hallway. I had no idea where I was going. I was unconscious when they brought me down here, so all I had to go on was my eyes, ears, and a bit of intuition.
“Do you remember where the exit was when you came inside?” I asked Naomi.
“Yes,” her voice wavered as she bounced on my back. “They brought me in from the left but…”
“But that is the way the guards were coming,” I finished for her. “They will be guarding the exits.” I cursed under my breath as I continued to run down a series of twisting hallways with uneven elevation. Who dug these flecked-up tunnels? Probably Kulks.
I pumped my arm while the other held Naomi secure. I winced as my ribs protested. Standing in the cell while focused on Naomi, I’d been lulled into the belief my injuries weren’t as bad.
I was wrong. So very wrong. My legs threatened to buckle with every step I took, and my vision whited out around the edges as dizziness swamped me. A piercing stab in my side came with every breath, letting me know my ribs were far from healed. My method had always been to meet whatever blocked my path head-on and destroy it on my way to safety, but that wasn’t going to work. Not this time. I had fought with these many injuries before, but not with so much on the line. If I died, Naomi was vulnerable to the Uldani’s flecked-up plans.
“We have to hide,” I said. “I have to heal. And we need to draw them away from the entrance and make them search for us.”
“I don’t have a better idea,” she groused. “You didn’t let me in on your escape plan nor tell me you were going to smash your way out.”
“What other way is there?” I demanded.
“I don’t know!” She smacked my back. “Some finesse. A delicate touch.”
I snorted. “Do I look like I do delicate?”
She didn’t answer for a moment until she finally muttered. “You’re right. I should have known.”
This time, I really did grin. Good thing she couldn’t see my face.
Five
Naomi
I swallowed the bile that threatened to rise and was thankful I barely had anything in my stomach. Bouncing on Gar’s shoulder as he raced through the maze of dirt tunnels was worse than riding in the dark on his bike.
His gait was uneven, and his breath wheezed with every step. The sound terrified me. I’d never seen Gar as anything but solid and strong. To know he was hurting killed me, even if I was mad at him. Furious, in fact. The confession he’d laid on me in that cell had left me reeling.
I didn’t know how to process he’d gone off on a suicide mission all on his own without telling anyone. Or that he did in fact want a mate but didn’t think he deserved one. And not just any mate; he’d said he couldn’t have and didn’t deserve me. In what world was I better than Gar? I hadn’t agreed to this hierarchy. I had plenty of my own flaws, current curiosity and savior complex included.
My current thought process abruptly ended when Gar stumbled and fell forward. I went flying as he hit the ground hard, bracing himself with one hand. My hip connected with the ground first and I cried out as pain shot through my spine. I rolled a few times before coming to a stop, immediately rising to all fours to glance back at Gar. His condition had worsened. His wheezing had turned to gasps, and his blue face was ghostly white.
“Gar?” I scrambled toward him as he tried to get a leg under him, but it gave out and he slammed into the dirt with a groan.
“Try … ing to get … up,” he gasped as pain turned his eyes a deep, fathomless black.
“Stop trying, you dumbass,” I said.
“You curse … lot,” he rumbled.
“Yeah, well, when you work in construction, it just kinda rubs off on you.” Helplessness bubbled in my gut as I watched as Gar struggled to breathe, his limbs shaking with tremors of pain. We had to hide. That was the plan Gar had before he’d taken a nosedive. Hide.
I glanced around, searching for something, anything, and found a small alcove a few yards ahead. I ran toward it, ignoring Gar as he angrily called my name. I pressed my ear against the wooden door, listening for any voices or sounds. The last thing we needed was to bust into a fully occupied room of Kulks.
Closing my eyes, I tuned out Gar’s wheezing, swearing, and crawling shuffles. I couldn’t hear a single sound from the other side of the door. Surely if someone were in there, they would have heard us by now. Gar had hit the ground like a felled elephant. I was surprised the thud hadn’t caved us in like a mine collapse.
The door was locked, and I ran back to Gar, slipping the keycard out of his pants pocket where he’d stowed it. He offered up some sort of protest, but I was getting good at ignoring him. I raced back to the door and swiped it through the lock. It clicked open just as Gar lurched to his feet and braced himself up on the wall by the door. “Smart, little one,” he rasped. “Let me check the room first.”
He pulled himself to his full height, and I knew it hurt him. He took a step inside. I peered around him, which meant my sightline was between his waist and forearm. The room, which was about the size of the cell we’d just left, was mostly bare. It looked like some sort of storage unit that wasn’t well-used. A few digging tools lay at the back.
I pushed Gar inside—it spoke to his injuries that he let himself be moved—and shut the door behind us. We were plunged into complete darkness. The only light was a thin strip under the door from the solar light across the hall.
“Fleck,” he muttered and then groaned. I heard a thud and knew he’d hit the floor. “I need to rest,” he said. “I’ll be okay, just … time.”
I felt around until my hands closed around his broken horn. He jerked away with a growl.
“Sorry, sorry,” I said. “Just trying to—Oomph!”
Arms closed around my waist and tugged me down to the floor next to a big, hard, warm body. I heard him swallow a few times before the qua jug the Kulk had given us was pressed into my hand. “Drink. Hungry?”
I took a long swig of qua. “No,” I said. “You eat, please. I’ll have something later.”
When I heard chewing, I knew he had to feel pretty hurt not to protest about me eating first. “Sleep, little one,” he said. “We should be safe here. There is a lot of area to search. I’ll hear if anyone comes outside.”
I yawned. “You need to sleep too.”
“I will be fine,” he rumbled. “Sleep.”
His fingers closed around the back of my neck, and he pressed the side of my head onto his biceps to use as a pillow. I listened to his heart, which beat strong and steady, and I focused on his breathing which had evened out and sounded less raspy. I slowly reached out until my arms rested on his chest. He’d never let me get this close to him before, and the power under my fingertips overwhelmed me. Even hurt, he was a threat to any Kulk or Uldani. I brushed a scar over his heart, and his skin twitched between my palms.
It h
ad been a long time since I’d been next to a male member of any species like this. And not just next to but touching. We were connected from toes to head. Well, my head on his biceps. His head was … somewhere above me in the dark. My toes were somewhere around his knee area. Maybe.
I’d never had sex. Just … never. A few guys had fumbled fingers around my general vaginal location but that had never amounted to much as we’d been teenagers. By the time I finished high school and started working for my brother, he’d chased away just about every date of mine.
So yeah, I was a virgin. I didn’t think it was a big deal. I wasn’t holding on to it for marriage or someone special. I had just been kinda shy, and then busy, and it never happened. I had blurted it out one time while a little drunk on Xavy’s spirits and the girls had made it a whole thing. They acted like I had to be preserved and protected, as if my intact hymen meant I couldn’t be trusted to make my own decisions about what I did with my body.
I didn’t think it was a big deal. There was no actual card I carried in my pocket. I had made out with men and used a vibrator. I had just never had an actual penis enter my body.
The thing my brother never understood was that touch was my love language. He wasn’t a hugging type of guy, and neither were our parents. Miranda and the other women were the only ones who seemed to get that I liked physical touch. It soothed me. Which was why Gar’s rejection of me—from his physical presence to his eye contact—hurt.
But now, he’d tugged me against him, and I wasn’t sure he even realized his hand, connected to the biceps I was resting on, had lowered to support my back. His tail curled around my thighs. I was caged in, warm, and protected. And I fucking loved it.
I never really admitted it to anyone, but I was jealous of the girls who’d found themselves mates. I liked to be connected to someone, and despite his damage, I wanted that someone to be Gar. I had from the beginning, when his gaze had settled on me, hard and deadly, but his touch was gentle and unsure.
