by Tana Stone
I clenched my jaw at the casual way she talked about treason. “More important than battle chief?”
She shrugged. “I don’t know. I just sense he needs to feel important.”
I reminded myself that humans did not understand the Vandar ways, and that females—even a Raisa—did not contradict a Raas. But she did not know, and I was enjoying hearing her impressions of my crew too much to shut her up. Or maybe it was just the sound of her voice. I took a deep breath. “Have you always known what people think?”
She laughed. “It’s not like I’m psychic. I can’t read minds, but I guess I do read faces and those little flashes of expressions that people try to hide. And, yeah, I’ve been doing it for as long as I can remember. It used to drive my parents crazy because they could never bluff me.”
“Your parents are…?”
“Gone,” she said quickly. “For a while now. It’s just been me and Tara since I was around twelve and she was fifteen.”
“Two females by themselves?” The thought of it was startling. Vandar females—especially ones so young—would never be alone. Then again, our race had maintained our horde structure—in space and on our hidden settlements. We lived and moved as a group. No one was left behind or made to fend for themself. And no female would not be protected by a male. Or a horde of them.
“We were living on an outpost when my parents were killed. There wasn’t anyone to take care of us, so Tara took charge. She’s always been good at that. She’s also good at cards. It’s how she won her ship.”
“And started working for the Zagrath?”
Her small body tensed on mine. “You don’t know what it’s like trying to survive out there. If the empire is the only one paying, you work for them.”
“Even if they take over planets and rule civilizations that are not theirs?” My pulse quickened. “Even if they control entire sectors without mercy?”
She lifted her head and looked at me. “Is a Vandar raider lecturing me on mercy?”
I clenched my teeth. I knew our reputation as merciless and brutal was deserved, but it was for a higher purpose. “We are only merciless to those who are part of the empire.”
“That includes a lot of innocent people.”
I stared up at the ceiling. “No one who works for the empire is innocent. Every act that benefits them means fewer planets are free.”
“So, was I guilty? And my sister? And all the decent people working on her ship just trying to scrape out a living?”
I grunted but did not look down at her, even though I felt her intense gaze on me. “I showed mercy on your sister and her ship.” I dropped my eyes to hers. “And to you.”
“But if you hadn’t wanted to take me…?”
“Do not ask me questions you don’t want the answers to, Raisa.” I sat up, letting her fall to the bed, as I swung my legs over the side and stood. I stalked to the dresser, pulling out a dark swath of fabric I wrapped around my waist.
“Why are you so mad?” she asked.
I spun around, taking fast steps toward her. She’d sat up and pulled the black sheets around her chest, but she scooted back when she saw me coming, her head bumping the headboard of iron shields and axes.
“I am angry because the Zagrath invaded my planet and decimated my people, ruling over us with cruelty until those who were left revolted and took to the skies. Because we fought back and continue to challenge them, we are the evil ones. We, who only want to free the galaxy from the empire’s choking control, are called terrorists while they move freely as legitimate rulers.”
She gaped at me. “I didn’t know.”
I folded my arms and let out a choked laugh. “The Zagrath have done a very good job of painting us as criminals. Our only wish is to free the galaxy.”
She blinked her wide, green eyes at me. “And then? What happens if you finally win? What will the raider hordes do then?”
It was my turn to stare at her. I did not know what would happen then. I had been raiding for most of my life, and the Vandar had been raiding for generations. I could not imagine a world in which I was not fueled by my need for revenge and justice.
“Your life should be about more than revenge, Kratos.”
I bent over her, my face so close to hers I could feel her quick breath. I ran a hand up her neck, closing it around her throat. “You are here to warm my bed and pleasure me, female, but I do not want you in my head.”
Chapter Twenty-Three
Astrid
Kratos was gone when I woke up the next morning, and I didn’t see him for the entire day. I guessed I’d freaked him out by hitting too close to home. I wasn’t trying to get in his head—like he’d accused me of doing—but I knew there was more to the guy than muscles and rage.
When he crawled in bed that night, he woke me up by pushing my nightgown up and climbing on top of me. I’d still been half asleep when he’d thrust his cock into me, moving hard and fast in the dark. Even though he didn’t speak as he fucked me, he’d kissed me deeply, his tongue caressing mine as he moved thickly between my legs.
“Raas,” I’d whispered, when he’d broken the kiss.
He shook his head, kissing me again. “Don’t talk. I just want to feel you, Raisa.”
Then he’d kept his mouth on mine, silencing me with his intoxicating kisses. Even when I’d come, moaning and jerking underneath him, he’d swallowed my cries with his mouth. But there had been so much in his kisses—so much longing, so much need, so much pain.
After he’d roared his release and pulsed hot into me, he’d held me for a while, kissing my neck and face before rolling over and holding me to him as he fell asleep.
And so it went, day after day. He would leave before I woke, stay away all day, then crawl into bed, spreading my legs and taking me. There were few words, only loud gasps and moans and screams and, finally, panting and the heavy breathing of his sleep. Sometimes I fell asleep right away, sometimes I stayed awake and listened to him breathe, wondering what my life had become.
I hated to admit that I loved sex with my Vandar captor as much as I did. But I also knew I needed more than our encounters in the dark. It was clear that the Raas was avoiding me, but the strange wall he’d built between us left me with an ache in my heart. Even when he was inside me, his cock filling me completely, I felt the emptiness of our unspoken words. The way he touched me and licked me and kissed me made me feel adored, but that feeling disappeared during the long hours he left me alone with only Krin for company.
Krin, on the other hand, had become much more to me than I could have imagined. After our venture into the kitchens, he’d gotten permission to take me around the ship, so at least I was no longer confined to the Raas’ quarters.
“What should we do today?” he asked when he arrived at my door, his smile wide and his dark hair as messy as it always was.
I waved him inside. I’d already bathed and eaten the breakfast brought to me, but I’d saved some of the bread for my young friend—like always. I motioned to the two brown knots on the low table, and he eagerly snatched them up, perching on the ottoman as he took a bite. I didn’t think they underfed the apprentices, but I also knew that growing boys were always hungry.
“Well, we’ve probably bothered the kitchen staff enough for this week.” I watched his face fall. “But I promise I’ll make you another cake soon. Maybe this time I can figure out how to make icing.”
“Icing?” he mumbled through his mouthful.
I laughed. “It’s sweet and sticky and supposed to cover the outside of a cake.”
Krin wrinkled his nose and swallowed. “Why would you want to put something sticky all over a cake?’
He had a good point. “I don’t know. It’s really sweet and tastes amazing. And you can’t steal bits of frosting off the top, if there’s no frosting.”
He seemed to accept this explanation. “We could celebrate your birthday next and put icing on that cake.”
“My birthday isn’t for a while
, although I’m starting to lose track of time.” I walked to the wide windows across the far wall and peered out at the black curtain of space, tiny pinpricks of light dotting it.
He scrunched his mouth to one side. “How old are you?”
“Twenty Earth years. Not very old.” I could tell from his face he wasn’t so sure.
“The Raas is older than you.” Krin always looked solemn when he spoke of Kratos. “He has been leading this horde for many rotations, and even more battles.”
“How often does the horde do battle?” I asked, turning away from the view. As far as I knew, we’d been patrolling for days without contact with any other ships.
He bobbled his head. “Depends. Sometimes a lot. Sometimes not.”
I folded my arms over my chest. “Very helpful, Krin.”
He laughed then slapped a hand over his mouth, glancing back at the door as if the guard outside could hear through the thick metal.
“I have an idea,” I said, walking closer to where he sat and lowering my voice to a conspiratorial whisper.
His eyes lit up with excitement. Like any child, he was fascinated by anything secret or forbidden. I planned to use that to my advantage.
“If we go into battle, every Vandar knows how to defend himself, right?”
He nodded with enthusiasm. “Of course.”
“Even the apprentices are instructed in basic combat as part of their training, yes?”
“Yes.” He puffed out his chest. “We all know how to fight.”
“Then doesn’t it seem like I should learn how to fight? If I’m going to live on a Vandar raider warship, I should at least know the basics of how to defend myself, don’t you think?”
Krin gnawed on his bottom lip. “First of all, our ships are warbirds. And I don’t know about teaching you to battle. The Raas may not want you doing that.”
“The Raas isn’t here,” I said, then realized how sharp my tone had been. “I mean, the Raas is busy leading the horde. He can’t be bothered teaching me how to fight. But you can.”
Krin did not look convinced.
“Do you remember when attackers invaded the ship on Jaldon?” I asked. “I was all by myself, and I had no way to protect myself. I didn’t have a weapon and even if I’d found one, I didn’t know how to use it. I had to run and hide. If the Raas hadn’t found me before the invaders did…” The crack in my voice was real, the memory of huddling alone, terrified of being found by the aliens who wanted to kill me, still fresh in my mind.
“Okay,” Krin said with a firm nod. “I’ll teach you what I know.”
I sighed with relief. What I’d told him was true. I didn’t want to be the only one on the ship who couldn’t defend herself. If I was going to be living among the Vandar raiders for the foreseeable future, I might as well learn to fight like them. I’d despised how powerless I’d felt when the ship had been attacked and my only option had been to hide.
I knew that the Raas would do everything he could to protect me, but I also knew that he couldn’t always be with me. And at the present moment, he clearly wanted to be anywhere but near me.
“Can we start now?” I asked, gathering my skirts up to leave.
Krin eyed me. “You can’t fight in that.”
I glanced down at the loose fabric that covered me all the way down to my toes. He was right. I could barely move in the voluminous dress, much less fight in it. I knew the Raas had disposed of my old clothes, and there was nothing in the cabinets but more dresses like the one I wore and short nightgowns. “I don’t have anything else.”
Krin thought for a moment, looking me up and down, then grinned. “I’ve got an idea. Vaes.”
Chapter Twenty-Four
Kratos
I stood at the illuminated star chart in my strategy room, peering at the colored dots moving across the glass. We were no closer to finding the Zagrath who ordered the attack on my ship than we were when we started, but I’d spent considerably more time staring at the map than I ever had before. Part of that was my determination to hunt down the enemy that dared order an invasion of my ship, and part was because I could not return to my quarters. At least not when Astrid was awake.
Her observations had unnerved me and made me doubt my mission for the first time in my life. I knew that a Raas could not doubt. Doubt was weakness, and weakness led to defeat and death. No, there was no room in my head for her insights. Not if I wished to remain strong. And remain the Raas.
As much as I feared that she would weaken me, I could not stay away from her altogether. At night, I took her with an abandon I could not during the day. In the dark, I poured all my desires and needs into her, memorizing her body with my fingers, my tongue, and my tail, savoring her cries and moans. I fucked her until I was sated, and she was trembling from her release. Each night, we fell asleep with our slick bodies entwined, and those moments carried me through the long days. But still, I missed the soft lilt of her humming, the pretty flush on her cheeks when I disrobed, and the hungry look in her green eyes just before I buried my cock in her.
A pounding on the door made me banish my thoughts of her and press my hard cock down with my arms folded in front of me. “Vaes.”
Bron strode inside when the doors slid open, his eyes going to me then to the star chart. “I thought I might find you here.”
“Where are they?” I asked, gesturing to the clear chart that took up most of one wall.
“No doubt hiding like the cowards they are.”
I grunted and turned back to the chart, tapping my finger on a distant planet. “We’ve tracked ships on a trajectory to this planet lately. Maybe this is the new Zagrath outpost. It’s outside the neutral zone, but not close to Vandar space.”
Bron stepped closer. “That would be a smart move for the Zagrath. It’s close enough to their territory that they could easily defend it.”
“Yet they don’t,” I said. “Sensors have picked up no blockades or regular patrols.”
“Then maybe it isn’t a new outpost. The Zagrath rarely set up a military outpost without fortifying it.”
I tapped the glass. “Which tips us off. What if they’re leaving this outpost undefended so we don’t identify it as military?”
Bron nodded. “That would be clever. Risky, but clever.”
“It is what we would do.”
“True, but the Zagrath rarely do what we would do.”
“Until now,” I said, my certainty growing. I dragged both hands through my hair. “Set a course for this planet.”
Bron clicked his heels. “Yes, Raas.” He turned to go, then hesitated. “Do you mind if I ask if everything is okay, Raas?”
I flinched. “Why?”
“You look like you are not sleeping, Kratos. And you never leave the command deck.”
His use of my name meant he was talking to me as my friend. It was true I wasn’t sleeping much, but that was because I was up half the night fucking the female who captivated my every waking moment—trying desperately to burn off my obsession with her. It was not because I was working.
“I thought you told me I needed to be seen on the command deck more,” I said, my voice sharp. “Well, here I am.”
My majak frowned at me. “I did not mean that you should abandon everything for command, Raas.”
“That is what it is to be Raas.”
He drew in a long breath before continuing. “I know you do not see her anymore, Raas. I know she spends her days with the boy. I know she eats her meal with him every night.”
Of course, my majak would know these things. He had assigned the apprentice. He would get reports from the boy. He probably knew more about her than I did. I remembered what Astrid had told me about Bron, and knew she was right. Bron asked me questions I did not welcome because he was my loyal majak.
“What do you know?” I asked, hating the worry in my voice. “Is she unhappy?”
“Do you care?”
I spun away from him in frustration, bracing my arms wide
on the ebony desk. “My loyalty is to the Vandar. Not to her happiness.”
“Agreed, Raas. But you did take her as your prize. I can only assume you have claimed her. If you do not wish to keep her, you should let her go.”
I rounded on him. “I will not give her up!”
His expression did not waver, even as I shook with anger. “So, you do care.”
I raked both hands through my hair. “I cannot let my need for her weaken me.”
I should not have admitted this to anyone, but there was no one I trusted more than Bron.
“Raas.” His voice was low. “Desire does not have to weaken you. Are we weaker for visiting pleasure planets?”
“No, but she is not like a pleasurer,” I said. “I cannot fuck her and forget about her.”
“Then I think I would consider you lucky, Raas.”
I choked out a laugh. “I do not feel lucky. I feel like I’m being ripped in two.”
“Just because you are passionate about the female does not mean you are any less passionate for your people or your mission.” Bron put a hand on my shoulder. “You are a big enough Vandar warrior to contain both, I think.”
I met my majak’s gaze. “You are wise, my friend. My Raisa was right about you.”
His eyebrows lifted. “Your Raisa?” His gaze dropped to my markings then back to my eyes. “Raas?”
I shook my head, knowing I’d said too much. “I know it is impossible.”
He was silent for a moment. “What was she right about me?”
“She said you want to protect me, and that no one was more loyal to me than you.”
The edges of his mouth twitched. “I have always liked that female of yours.”
I allowed myself a smile. “Not too much, I hope.”
“Not too much,” he said. “But since we are talking of her, you should probably know that she is currently in the battle ring.”
“What?” I jerked up. “Why is she in the battle ring?”
