“All right, what does she like to do with her free time? Does she like to travel or is she a homebody?” There had to be something wrong. She couldn’t be this perfect.
“She likes to go camping, river rafting, and hiking when she has company. She loves to explore small out of the way places and window shop. But she can stay home, work around the house. In the beginning of her last relationship she was always doing something with Teresa. But then when things started to go bad she spent a lot of her time doing those things by herself.” Jessie hoped telling all of this to Alex would be okay with Sam.
“Jess, is she the jealous controlling type? The other day Andy kissed me and I thought she was going to blow her top.” This was the last serious question, but one of the most important to Alex.
“If she was jealous, she’s in deeper than I thought. But in a way that’s a good thing. If she had been jealous of all the time Teresa had been spending with her best friend she may have found out sooner what was going on. But she wasn’t. So that tells me she has deeper feelings for you then she ever did for the ex. That Whitney charm must be working overtime.”
“So it’s a good thing and she isn’t controlling?” Time would tell after revealing the details about her friendship with Cyn. It would be interesting to see her reaction.
“Controlling, not in the least. As long as she knows she has your heart, she’ll let the rest of you do whatever you want. Is that what you wanted to hear?” On that point the cousins were of the same mind.
“What about trusting me that what I tell her is the truth. What if I tell her she has my heart, and she doesn’t believe me? What then?” Being apart for long times always seemed to be a good reason for jealousy. Especially in the beginning.
“Sam is very trusting until she has reasons not to be. You’ll have complete trust, but if you lie to her, even if it is only a little white lie, and she finds out you’re done as far as the trust issue goes. We’re alike in this respect. There isn’t anything you can’t tell us and we won’t understand. So the need to lie means you’re doing something that we wouldn’t be able to forgive and shouldn’t have to.” Jessie knew her cousin well regarding this issue.
“I just figured after what Teresa did to her I may have to deal with old tapes and I wouldn’t blame her, but it isn’t fair to me.” Trust was a big deal to Alex and it was one thing she had with Dez, until she had reason to think otherwise.
“I can’t say she wouldn’t do that, because you need to hear it from her to mean anything to you. But I will say that if our past conversations on this subject mean anything, you will start with a clean slate.” Jessie was glad they had this conversation. She hoped she had eased Alex’s concerns and that she and Sam could just have fun for the time being.
“Thanks, Jess. You have really helped me out. I just can’t believe finding the right person could be this easy and this soon! Or at least I hope she’s the right person.” Alex started to clean up around the shed. She wanted to hit the shower before Sam returned and the sun told her it was getting close to lunch time.
“You’re welcome, and we can only hope that you two are right for each other. I have my fingers crossed.” Jessie sent up a little prayer every night too.
Chapter 21
Walking into her casita, Alex figured she had enough time to take a quick shower and wash her hair. If she and Sam did spend the afternoon laying around she wanted to make sure she smelled as good as soap and water could get her. Not liking perfume that much, Alex usually smelled like the soap or hand lotion she used. Kissing someone on the neck was so sensual until you tasted their perfume. Then it made you wish you hadn’t gone there in the first place. Realizing that Sam may want to take a shower herself, she wondered if she would want to use hers. Although, having kissed Dez when she had been sweaty was tasty if you liked a salty neck to go with your order of lips. That would have to be Sam’s call.
Just as Alex had finished blow drying her hair she heard a knock. The door opened and Sam walked in with a bag in her hand containing a change of clothes. She asked Alex if she could use her shower and then found herself being helped getting undressed. But it was slow going as the kissing was making it hard to concentrate on getting the buttons undone. When Sam was down to her underwear, Alex turned her loose so she could shower in peace. Taking one together had crossed her mind, but that would have to wait until more time had passed.
Putting Sam’s bag inside the bathroom for her so she could get dressed, Alex hurried off to go get them lunch, which they could either eat in her room or take with them. The staff must have known her need for fast food as Alex grabbed several tacos, quesadillas, and two chicken burritos. She spotted Andy and Dean and gave them her regrets about not having lunch together. Andy smiled and said he completely understood. He hoped they both felt better by dinnertime, as tonight was the monthly moonlight hayride. He winked at her and tried not to smile too much. Alex quickly grabbed two bottles of raspberry ice tea. She had forgotten about the hayride and needed to talk to Jessie before she headed back to the room. Spotting Jessie and Dawson smiling at her, she walked up between them and asked if she and Sam could both be excused from the ride. Jessie said of course, but if they wanted any dinner they would have to go into the kitchen and make it themselves. She would tell the staff it was all right and she really hoped they came up for air soon. Blushing as she walked out, Alex wondered just how obvious it was that she had a date waiting for her.
When she got back, the bathroom door was still closed. Carefully moving her picture and fetishes to the side table next to her bed, she laid the food out and set the little table with utensils and napkins. Just then the door opened and Sam walked out with her work clothes rolled up and put them next to her bag on the floor. Looking at each other for a moment before speaking, Alex hoped that the fact Sam was wearing a short sleeve front buttoning shirt meant they were staying in this afternoon.
“Hi. How was your ride?” Alex was trying her best to appear calm and nonchalant.
“Great. All returned safe and sound. How did the painting go? Did you finish?”
“All done and everything put away. How would you like to spend the afternoon? I have two plans I thought I would run by you.” She thought she should mention Plan B first just so Sam wouldn’t think she had a one track mind.
“Does one of these plans have us spending the rest of the afternoon right here?
“Yes. That would be one of my plans. Is that the one you’re voting for?” This was one great plan that may need to be suggested a few more times.
Sam didn’t respond as she put her arms around Alex. She looked into her eyes, then kissed her several times before she led her to the bed. They ended up spending the next several hours kissing and talking about what they wanted out of a relationship. Sam repeated everything that Alex had heard from Jessie. It was very reassuring to hear it coming from her, and the panicked feeling was slowly melting away.
All the casitas came with little kitchenettes, so they were able to reheat their lunch. Having fun feeding each other their quesadilla, the subject shifted to cooking as does all girl talk eventually. Sam loved to cook, Alex not so much. But she did have a few things she made really well. So it was decided Sam would do all the cooking when she came out in December and Alex would sub a few times with her specialties.
Then Alex decided it was time to bring up Cyn. First she brought up the trust issue so it would be out there right off the bat. Then she told Sam the history of their friendship, what they had been through the last month, and how close they had become. They were really good friends, not as good as she and Jessie, but very close friends. She still wanted to be able to see Cyn and have their Wednesday night outings, and really hoped it wouldn’t be a problem. Alex was getting better at reading Sam’s expressions, so when she looked at her she knew something was on her mind.
“Talk to me. Tell me what’s bothering you. We need to be able to tell each other what’s bugging us or even upsetting us
in the least little way.” Alex wondered if this was the quiet time Jessie had told her about.
“I can’t believe you’re asking me if it will be all right. Anyone else would have just said this is how it is like it or lump it.” Sam would never ask anyone to give up their friends just because they were dating or had become a couple.
“Well, I don’t want to disregard your feelings. Trust me, I’ve been down this road and it’s the most helpless feeling you can have having your girlfriend tell you, ‘I’m so sorry, dear, you’re distressed by my new friend, but tough. We’re just friends and the fact that we seem to spend a lot of time together is just your imagination, get over it.’ Oh, trust me that will rip you up if you ever hear it.” The words came out before Alex realized that’s probably exactly what Sam had heard from her ex.
“Not those words exactly, but pretty close. I guess I don’t feel so bad knowing I’m not the only one who’s ever heard them.” Sam needed a reassuring hug from Alex that it would never happen to them.
“Sam, I swear to you that I will never negate your feelings in any way. Can we make that pact right now between the both of us?” Alex needed to hear those same words come from her as well.
“I swear.” Sam kissed Alex to seal the promise and then kissed her on the nose to lighten up the moment.
“Okay, enough serious stuff. Let’s plan what we’re going to do tomorrow afternoon.” Trusty Plan B was still unused and Alex was ready to lay it out.
“I assume since you had two plans that they both weren’t to stay here so let’s hear your other plan.” Looking at the clock, Sam hadn’t realized how late it was getting, until she heard all the noise coming from the wagon full of guests leaving.
“Oh gosh, the hayride. Did you want to go?” Sam wondered if she had been looking forward to it, since they had talked about it several times.
“You are so cute. Do you really think I could keep a straight face sitting around the campfire or be able to keep my hands off of you. Thank you for asking, but I’m right where I want to be. We’ve also been given permission by the boss lady to raid the kitchen and make ourselves dinner. So are you up for dinner or go straight to dessert?” Smiling as she said the last part, Alex figured Sam would let her know what kind of dessert she wanted.
Deciding to grab something to nibble on besides each other, they walked to the dining hall holding hands. Since it was dark with only the moonlight, they felt pretty safe and that no one left on the ranch would notice. Entering, Alex headed for the kitchen since she knew where all the good stuff was kept. Opening the big refrigerator, there were plenty of leftovers from lunch and their picnic ride from last night. Taking a cloth napkin they started to place several items in it, then Sam found where the cheesecakes were stored. She put a couple of pieces on a plate and grabbed several chocolate chip cookies. Sam had her hands full, so Alex grabbed the last necessary item a half full bottle of milk. Being able to store food in her little refrigerator, they were set for the night.
Alex asked Sam if she wanted to take a little walk. The night was so beautiful and she had an extra sweatshirt and sweater she could wear. Leaving the casita, both women looked up at the moon and made a wish. Walking slowly, Alex let go of Sam’s hand so she could put hers inside Sam’s back pocket. She was then able to pull her closer as they walked. Having a free hand herself Sam did the same thing. Feeling the cold against her face, Alex felt very much alive and a little guilty that one person could be having this much fun and getting a paid leave of absence to boot. But the guilt was a temporary feeling at best.
Alex headed for the swing on the office porch. They sat at one end and put their feet up so they could cuddle. Alex could only think about how her life had suddenly gone from lousy to great. What corner had she turned that she was suddenly doing great in everything she tried? Of course the attempted murder was not great, but because of that she was able to take this trip and meet Sam. She realized she needed to call Lena, not that she would kick Sam to the curb if they weren’t compatible, but maybe she could explain this sudden windfall of good fortune.
Sitting for several minutes in silence, Alex realized that Sam had fallen asleep in her arms with her head on her shoulder. Listening to her breathing and smelling her hair brought back the best memories of all her relationships the beginning. Everything was wonderful. Nothing bothered either of you in that honeymoon stage. As newlyweds you went everywhere together, laughed at each other’s jokes, no matter how bad. There were hours spent in bed or making out on the couch, in the kitchen, shower, garage wherever you were together. But then as time went on the magic always seemed to fade. Suddenly the jokes weren’t so funny, as one of you was always further ahead than the other. It always seemed to Alex that she was way ahead of her girlfriend. She was open about everything and knew exactly what she wanted. The whole point of dating was getting to know each other so you could make a decision early enough so that either of you could back out before it went too far and someone got hurt. Not that she was expecting the other person to be perfect, but hoped what flaws they did have weren’t big enough to make you want to stop dating.
Except for Dez, her past experiences were usually fine for the first six months, and then they started to change. Suddenly her partners didn’t know what they wanted, or they wanted her to change and be more like their last girlfriend. Could they run your life for you? Could you be psychic and know what they wanted you to do before they knew they wanted you to do it? Could you do everything they asked you to do, but not expect them to be there for you in return? Alex realized she had a high tolerance for such requests because she thought they were both working towards the same goal – a long term relationship. But she usually found herself being used, even by Dez, and it was partly her fault for being so trusting and loving. This time Sam came with references from someone she trusted with her life, and in a way this was her life. Having the Jessie Pierce-Black seal of approval went a long way in her book, all the way to the alter if she wanted it to. Suddenly Sam jumped in her sleep and woke herself up.
“Dreaming, were you?” Rubbing her back, Alex gave her a big hug.
“I was walking in this beautiful meadow and then suddenly there was my ex standing in front of me. She came towards me like she wanted a kiss so I jumped back to keep away from her.” Sam twisted her neck until it cracked and then sat up.
“Your ex. Hmmm, maybe your subconscious is trying to tell you something.” Playing therapist, Alex wondered how she would respond to that.
“Yes. If you see your ex, run like the devil himself is after you.” Sam couldn’t be happier with Alex, so wondered what that dream meant.
“That was definitely the right answer. But is it what you really feel, without any hesitation at all in your mind?” Alex thought it may be too soon to ask that kind of question, but it didn’t hurt to throw it out there and see what came from it.
“Well, I’m as sure as I can be at this point in time. But maybe tomorrow you’ll tell me you’re moving on and you’re going to start dating Andy. That would definitely make me change my mind.” Tickling Alex as she said it, she knew she was hers as long as she didn’t do anything to lose her love, and that was absolutely the last thing she would ever do.
“Tickling isn’t fair. My father used to tickle me until I couldn’t breath. I’m an easy mark in that department.” Wishing she could have had her father and grandfather meet Sam, the tears filled her eyes. Once again she faced the realization that she had no family, except Jessie, to share her hopes and dreams with. It was something she prayed would change someday soon.
Seeing the tears, Sam realized how much Alex missed her father. She still had all of her family’s love and support. Alex was an orphan in a way. Estranged from her mother and other relatives must be why she loved Jessie so much she was everything to Alex.
“I’m sorry. Tickling is off limits.” Sam kissed her gently and wiped the tears from her eyes. “How would you like a massage? Jessie says I have the
best hands in the state, although I’ve always wondered how she would know that.” Smiling at her statement, Sam got up and held her hand out to Alex.
“I would love a massage. The best hands in the state, you say. Hmmm. I like the sound of that and Jessie is a great reference.” Taking Sam’s hand, Alex looked at this wonderful woman and wished she could be cloned so Cyn could be this happy too.
Chapter 22
The massage was heaven and Jessie was right about Sam’s hands. They were the best in the state, if not the country. Now granted, most masseurs don’t kiss the back of their subject’s neck or shoulders. They keep it strictly business. But in this case Alex was really glad it wasn’t business. Moaning her pleasure let Sam know exactly what was working best and where. Using her fingers as if they were a feather she brushed them across her back which sent a sensation up Alex’s spine that was heaven itself. Asking her what she enjoyed the most, Sam continued for quite some time and even played with her hair, which was a sensation Alex had always enjoyed but could never get anyone to do without having to be asked. She on the other hand was always running her fingers through her lovers’ hair in hopes they would pick up on the “if it feels good to you, then it would feel good to me, too” hypothesis. It was a theory that was lost on all her past lovers. Loving every minute of it, Alex knew Sam had to be getting tired.
“Okay, enough for me. Now it’s your turn.” Alex started to get up and reach for her robe when Sam hit the lights.
“Not so fast, young lady. I’m not done with you yet.” Sam gently pushed Alex back onto the bed.
“Why, Miss Samantha, what kind of girl do you think
I am?” Alex watched as Sam took her top off, along with her
bra, and climbed on top of her.
“The kind of girl, I hope, who wants me to do exactly
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