Oh he could pretty it up, say he hadn’t wanted to get her hopes up if the test was negative, that the omission of information wasn’t the same as telling a falsehood, but the truth was she’d see it all as lies.
He understood why, of course. Her grandparents played with the truth, telling her only what they wanted her to know, whether for her own good or their own comfort. That lack of trust and respect made her sensitive to the truth. Anything less than total honesty was a lie.
He had no choice. If he refused to tell her, they’d only send someone else. He would not allow that.
But his protective instincts toward Amanda rivaled what he felt for family. Except there had never been a conflict between the Prince and his family.
Not that he expected any harm to come to Amanda. Certainly not physically, but her emotional welfare mattered, too. Who would watch out for her if not him?
He admired her intellect, her candor and loyalty. She was generous, caring, and brave. What she lacked was any sense of self-preservation. She gave her grandparents way too much control over her. How much would she give up for the father she never knew?
Tomorrow, he decided, was soon enough to find out.
CHAPTER EIGHT
“GOOD, YOU’RE AWAKE.” Amanda flipped on the overhead light as she entered the room carrying Xavier’s clothes. The one thing she’d insisted on in an apartment was a washer and dryer. “I dried your things.”
“Great.” He stood and reached for the stack in her hands.
She blushed and busied herself at the dresser, looking for a bracelet to brighten up her scoopnecked black sweater.
“We didn’t talk about dinner. My friends Michelle and Amanda are in town and I’m going to meet them at this great Italian place. Would you like to join us?”
His presence loomed behind her and she felt the warmth of him along her back and then the heat of his mouth on the exposed nape of her neck.
“I would prefer to have you to myself.” His voice was gruff. “But I will settle for sharing you with your friends.”
“I’m so glad.” Delighted with his response she twirled in his arms, linked her hands behind his neck. “I really want them to meet you. Well, you already met Michelle, but now you’ll get to know her. Wait.” She stopped chattering, finally noticing his clenched jaw and the light of battle in his eyes. “You’re upset. What’s wrong?”
For a moment his expression went ice cold and then he rolled his shoulders as if throwing something off. He leaned down and kissed her softly.
“I am nervous to meet your friends.”
“Nice try.” She straightened his collar where the corner was turned under. “But nothing makes you nervous. You can talk to me, you know. Am I being a Xavier hog? Do they need you to come into the museum? Or is it something from home? Is everyone in your family okay?”
“So many questions. My family is fine, thank you.”
“You’ve listened to all my gripes,” she said sheepishly but she was earnest when she continued. “I’ve never seen you upset. I want to help you if I can.”
She felt his hand fist against the small of her back and then relax.
“It is nothing that cannot wait until tomorrow. Let us enjoy tonight with your friends.”
“Are you sure?” she persisted. “I’ll be disappointed, but I understand if you have to go.”
“I need to be where you are. Of this I am sure.”
She lit up at his reassurance, at the old-fashioned phrasing that made her feel special, even when she knew it was probably a second language thing.
“Great. Then we should go.” She slipped on a red and black bangle bracelet and led the way to the door. “Don’t scare me like that. I thought you were going to tell me you’d been called back to Pasadonia.”
* * *
Amanda laughed at Nate’s dry comment. An ex-soldier turned small-town sheriff, his stoic pragmatism made him the perfect foil for the jaded, artistic Michelle. Just as the reckless hockey player, Max, was the ideal mate for Elle, a by-the-rules, family-oriented optimist.
Joy bloomed within Amanda. Sitting here with her dear friends, with the men they loved, and with the man she loved, was the happiest she’d ever been.
She loved Xavier? She carefully set her wine on the table. “Excuse me. I have to go to the restroom. Elle, Michelle?”
The two immediately stood up. “We’ll be right back,” Michelle declared.
“Why do they do that?” Nate said behind them.
“My theory is it’s a pack thing,” Max answered easily. “Ingrained into their DNA from the day of cavemen, when it wasn’t safe to venture out alone.”
“Creative thinking.”
“I can only tell you it is the same in Pasadonia.”
Michelle rolled her eyes.
Elle grinned. “They are so clueless.” She pushed into the restroom, held the door for the other two. “What’s up, Amanda? You were okay and then you suddenly went white.”
Amanda paced in front of the three stalls with shiny red doors. “I’ve done something really stupid.”
“Calm down, babe, we’ll work this out,” Elle assured her.
“As soon as you explain,” Michelle agreed. “I was sitting right there and didn’t see any stupid behavior.”
“That’s because it’s in here.” Amanda tapped her chest over her heart. “I love Xavier.”
“Oh, Amanda!” Excited, Elle clasped Amanda’s hand. And then she connected the dots that Xavier would be leaving in a few weeks. “Oh, Amanda.”
“What am I going to do?” She pleaded for guidance. “I don’t want him to go.”
“How does he feel?” Michelle asked. “Is there any possibility he’d stay?”
Amanda shook her head. “I can’t see where he would. He’s a royal guard. His whole career is tied to the Prince. And his family is there. It’s clear he cares deeply for them.”
“How does he feel about you?”
“I don’t know. He likes me.” At least he seemed to care about her. How did you tell these things when it really mattered? He hadn’t talked about love. But then neither had she.
Why would they, when he was leaving so soon?
“Amanda.” Michelle propped a hand on her hip. “He likes you? Please. The man has been devouring you with his eyes all night.”
“Oh yeah,” Elle confirmed. “He’s definitely enchanted with you.”
“Really?” Amanda asked, hungry for reassurance. “No, I know.” This when Michelle threw her hands up in disgust. “I know he wants me.” Her cheeks heated as she remembered their afternoon play. “But that’s lust, right? I want him, too, but what I feel is so much more than that.”
“What do you feel?” Elle asked.
“I love being with him, talking, learning things. We have a lot in common. He was upset before we came over tonight. He wouldn’t say what it was about, but it matters to me. I’ve had a really good time, but inside I’ve been brooding about how he’s feeling and if there’s anything I can do. He’s going home for a week next Tuesday. I keep thinking what if he doesn’t come back?”
“Oh, hon.” Elle rubbed her arm in sympathy.
“And then I’m sitting there watching you with the men you love, seeing how you look at them, as if they were personally responsible for the end of world hunger. And it hits me that’s how I feel about Xavier. I don’t want him to leave.”
There was no answer for that so silence fell over them as they stared at each other wishing for a resolution. Fighting back tears, Amanda needed to get away from the sympathy in their eyes and stepped into one of the stalls.
Two tears rolled down her cheeks. She’d never felt so impotent in her life. The three of them were usually undefeatable when they attacked a problem together. But love couldn’
t be forced, and the situation was what it was.
She’d been right to have concerns earlier, but they’d come too late to save her. The time for caution was past. Thinking back, she realized she’d been lost from the very first night.
A few minutes later the three of them were standing in front of the mirror washing their hands. “Thanks for listening to me.” She told her friends, “I’m so glad I have you both.”
“What about the sex?” Of course that was from Michelle. “Is it hot?”
“Honestly, Michelle,” Elle protested on Amanda’s behalf. “It’s not all about the sex.”
“No, but it is a factor. And our Amanda is a little naïve. If the sex is really good, she could be mistaking that for deeper emotions.”
Arms crossed in front of her, foot tapping, Elle considered the argument. “Okay, that’s a valid point.”
Both women turned their gazes on Amanda.
“Oh.” Heat scorched her cheeks. “Steaming hot.” Literally. “When it finally happened. He was such a gentleman I practically had to seduce him.”
“You had to seduce him?” Michelle demanded and turned to Elle. “Does that sound right to you?”
“Max ‘the Beast’ Beasley, bad boy of hockey, is a gentle, dedicated father,” Elle pointed out. “Xavier is an honorable man, here for a short time. Amanda is special. Maybe he didn’t want to hurt her.”
“Maybe, and six weeks can be a long-term relationship for some people.”
“But it doesn’t take a genius to know Amanda isn’t one of those people, and Xavier strikes me as pretty sharp.”
“Hey,” Amanda broke in. “Standing right here.” Anger snapped in her voice. “If you’re questioning Xavier’s manhood, don’t. He’s all man, an incredible lover, and yes, he does respect me. If you heard the stories I’ve heard about his mother you wouldn’t question his restraint.”
“Oh my, look at her defend her man.” Michelle affectionately tugged Amanda’s strawberry blond hair. “It must be love. Here’s a wild question, would you move to Pasadonia for him?”
“Wow.” Amanda froze as the concept rolled through her mind. Her first reaction was no, how could she? Her only family was here. Her dear, dear friends were here. But then she considered never seeing him again, and her whole being rejected the idea.
Stricken, she looked from Michelle to Elle.
“I don’t know,” she confessed.
Michelle reached for her hand and Elle placed hers over both of theirs uniting them all.
“My advice?” Michelle squeezed her fingers. “Whether it’s four days or a month, enjoy him while you can.”
Amanda bit her lip. It wasn’t the answer she’d hoped for, but it may well be the best advice she was going to get.
“I will. Thanks.” She hugged Michelle and then Elle. “Let’s go enjoy our men.”
Amanda led the way out and found Xavier leaning against the wall across from the ladies room.
“Hey,” she greeted him as her friends slipped past her and headed for the table.
“You were a long time,” he said, not moving. “You were pale when you left the table. I worried something might be wrong.”
“Sorry.” She stepped close, placed her hand on his chest. “Just catching up with my friends. Are you okay?”
He pulled her hand to his mouth, pressed a kiss in her palm. “And the tears?” He gently swept his thumb under her right eye, rubbing away lingering wetness.
How to answer that without giving up all her secrets? With a truth, if not the truth. She waved toward the table and the path her friends had taken.
“They are crazy, stupid in love. It got emotional.”
The intensity of his gaze never lessened. “You would tell me if you were hurting?”
She blinked back fresh tears. How sweet he was, how concerned for her welfare. Maybe he was a little enchanted.
“Yes.” It wasn’t a lie. Loving him hurt, but it was also heart-warming, exhilarating, and wonderful. She chose to focus on those elements until she was forced to say goodbye. “Come on.” She looped her arm through his. “Let’s go home and I’ll show you just how good I’m feeling.”
Michelle had the right idea. Amanda would enjoy him while she could.
CHAPTER NINE
“THE PRINCE OF Pasadonia is my father?” Shock made Amanda numb as she repeated Xavier’s words.
She sat in the muted elegance of Xavier’s suite at the Fairmont. A soft blue chair wrapped her in classic comfort. He’d asked her to come by this afternoon after work. She’d been excited to see him and thought they might go to dinner. Instead he sat her down and announced the Prince was her father.
He was different this evening, closed off from her, his expression guarded like when they’d first met. And he hadn’t kissed her. Now he’d presented this odd joke. Something smelled off, something that had to do with what upset him last night.
She tried for a lighthearted laugh in the spirit of his joke, but it fell short, sounding like a choked gasp. She was no good at pretending. So she went with the truth.
“Xavier, this isn’t funny. I’m serious when I say I want to find my father. Yes, my mother traveled through Pasadonia the summer before I was born, but I’d never claim a relationship with the Prince.”
“Of course not. You are too honest, too caring.” He spoke quietly, calmly. Not as if he was joking at all. “It is my hope that knowing your mother traveled in Pasadonia will help you to accept the Prince as your father more easily.”
“Stop saying that.” She shot to her feet. “The Prince of Pasadonia is not my father.”
“The proof is indisputable.” He gestured to an envelope on the dark wood coffee table. He kept his seat as she paced away. “The Prince is eager to meet you. I have been charged with bringing you to him.”
“A dim resemblance to a distant relative is hardly indisputable.” Agitated, she twisted her watchband as she paced in front of the window. “If my mother’s travels to Pasadonia were so relevant, why didn’t you say something at the time I told you she spent time in Pasadonia?”
Something flashed through his eyes, but it came and went so fast she wondered if she didn’t imagine the slight flinch.
“There was nothing to reveal at that time.”
“At that time? I don’t understand any of this. How does the Prince even know about me?” This was unreal.
He rose and came to her, halting her restless movements by taking her hands. His warm touch soothed her and she leaned into him.
“I’m sorry, this just doesn’t make sense.”
“Amanda.” She felt his hand run over her hair before he set her away from him. “I sent him the picture I took of you and Michelle. It was my duty. The resemblance is quite strong. The Prince was intrigued and the DNA test confirmed the relationship.”
“DNA test?” She pushed away from him. All warmth drained away. “How? You sent DNA?” Of course he did. Where else would they get it?
“It was necessary for an accurate identification. I know you are unsettled by this news, but there is nothing to fear. I will be with you.”
“You stole my DNA?” The words came out raw, but then that’s how she felt.
His shoulders went back. “Yes. It was an order.”
“Oh.” Her mind raced, going over the past two weeks. “Oh.” She closed her eyes as it all became clear. She’d been an assignment. He didn’t care for her. He was just doing his job, babysitting her until the test results came in.
“Amanda.” He tried to close the distance between them.
“No.” She backed away, step for step. He wasn’t the honorable man she’d thought him. “Why didn’t you tell me? Why didn’t you just ask?”
“If the tests were negative, there was no need for you to know they w
ere ever done.”
“And I could make no claim against the Prince, right?”
“It was a matter of discretion.”
“Why are you doing this?” she asked, desperate for an explanation that made sense. “You were upset last night, what happened? Have you been ordered back to Pasadonia and you’re pulling this stunt to make it easier to leave? If so, please stop, I’d rather keep the good memories of our time together.”
“I have been ordered to return to Pasadonia and bring you for presentation to your father. We shall leave on Tuesday.” He spoke with a terrible formality, stiffness in both his tone and his spine.
He was so unlike the warm and solicitous man she’d grown to love it took her a minute to process what he’d said. All her doubts and concerns came back to haunt her.
Except she’d never suspected him of deceit.
“Oh no, I’m not going to Pasadonia with you. I’m never going anywhere with you ever again.” In fact, she’d had enough. Where was her purse? She swung toward the chair she’d occupied earlier.
He stepped into her path. “I understand you are upset, but if you do not go with me, his majesty will only send another escort, and another, until you agree to come. Why drag this out? You wanted to find your father, now you have—and he desires to meet you.”
“Yes, I wanted to know who my father was.” She rubbed at her temple where a throbbing headache had blossomed. Her weariness and disillusionment were clear in her voice but she didn’t have the strength to hide her emotions at this point. “But whether I met him or not was to be my decision. I have obligations, a job, family. I can’t just drop everything and get on a plane with you.” This conversation was going nowhere. “I have to go.”
“Of course.” But he didn’t move out of her way. “Amanda, you are an intelligent woman. You are smart enough to know the truth when you hear it.” He walked to the coffee table, picked up the manila envelope, held it out to her.
She lifted furious eyes to him, letting rage override the hurt. “I don’t want it.”
“I know you are angry with me, but you know I would not lie to you. Read it. Call me on my mobile.”
The Making of a Princess Page 8
