“So how long did you say she’s been living on the boat?” Brody leaned against the wall in the tight captain’s quarters as Colby trolled around a spot known to be good for fishing.
He’d asked me to check something with the boat’s GPS, claiming that it seemed glitchy and was wondering if the depth finder was off. So while I messed with the system, I got an earful of Brody.
Colby shot me a glance before answering, but I kept my eyes focused on the screen. “Uh, she moved there a few months back.”
“Is everything okay with her?” Brody asked.
“Yeah, I think. Charity moved home with her kids or something. She said it got crowded so she decided to live on the boat. Plus, it’s close to work and all that.”
I glanced at Brody, who looked thoughtful. “Other than that, she seem okay?”
“Yeah, man. Felicity is still Felicity, you know.”
Colby seemed to be skirting around the topic, probably because it was awkward being between his best friend, who was her ex-guy and his cousin, who was her current guy. I just hoped Brody would drop it already.
“I think about her all the time.”
And clearly, he wasn’t dropping it anytime soon. Okay, then.
I pushed some buttons to search through the menu on the GPS, ready to get the hell out of there. I had one more setting to check, then I was ready to throw in the towel. I had no clue why the damn thing wasn’t working.
“You know, like how she’s doing and stuff.”
Colby’s gaze shifted toward me again, like he expected me to say something. But what was I supposed to say? Felicity hated people being in her business. I wasn’t about to be one of those people.
“I think she’s doing pretty good. You don’t need to worry about her.” Colby tapped the computer screen. “How’s it coming? Everything look all right?”
“Yeah, as far as I can tell. You might need to recalibrate the system or something. Other than that, all the settings look right to me.”
“Cool, man. Thanks for taking a look at it.”
“No problem. I’m gonna head back out.”
Colby looked just as relieved as I did. “Okay, thanks again.”
Just as I stepped out, I heard Brody ask another question about Felicity. But I just kept moving, unable to listen for one more second.
—
When we’d finished up for the day, I was spent. The days were getting hotter, the lack of sleep was catching up to me and I’d had enough of Felicity’s ex. I wasn’t really sure if she still wanted me over, but regardless of whatever was going on between us, I wanted to be with her.
I showered, changed into some clean clothes and grabbed my computer then headed over to her place to wait for her to get off.
Exhaustion outweighed hunger, so I plopped down on her bed and turned on a movie on my laptop, just needing a place to lie down. My whole body ached, and I think one of my shoulders got sunburned. I pulled off the scratchy T-shirt and adjusted the pillows so I could prop up my laptop.
But the next thing I knew, the room was dark, my computer was gone and Felicity was snuggled into me.
I had no idea what time she came home, or even what time it was now. With a quick check, I realized I had about ten minutes before I had to be up, so I pulled her closer. She stirred a bit then tucked herself into me. She fit perfectly too.
I watched her as she slept, all the worry gone from her face. She looked peaceful. Beautiful. No wonder Brody couldn’t let her go. I didn’t have nearly the history he had with her, and I already knew I didn’t want to lose her.
I brushed the side of her face, pulling her hair back, kissed her cheek and whispered, “I’m scared too.” Then I carefully shifted out from under her, grabbed my phone before the alarm could go off and slipped out of her cabin.
Just after I’d changed and made myself some coffee to power through the day, my phone chimed. I’d assumed it’d be Colby because I couldn’t imagine anyone else who’d be up this early, but to my surprise, it was Felicity.
Felicity: What scares you?
I didn’t think she’d heard me this morning, but the fact she was even trying to talk about it was kind of nice, considering we hadn’t said much to each other since she’d decided sex was a bad idea.
Me: The day you decide you don’t want this anymore.
Me: You?
Felicity: That day never coming.
And that was it. I was wrapped up in the fear of losing her, while she was wrapped up in the fear of losing herself. But how in the world did we meet in the middle?
Chapter 24
Felicity
The next two nights were a repeat of the one before. I showed up late, found Mason already asleep, climbed in next to him and didn’t wake until he left for work. But other than a whispered goodbye, we didn’t speak to each other.
I’d never doubted the love I’d felt for Brody, nor did I deny the attraction I’d felt for other guys, but what I felt for Mason left me confused. It was more than physical, and I was certain this was bigger than like. But I couldn’t love someone I’d only known for a few weeks. I’d only had one real relationship to compare it to, and in so many ways, it felt bigger than even that…which was the part that scared me.
The following day, the new guy at work had enough training to work independently, so I was able to get off at a decent time and made it home in the evening about the same time Mason’s boat came in for the day.
The guys were unloading stuff when I walked up, but stopped short. Brody had stepped off the boat and now stood directly in front of me.
“Hey.” He set down a cooler then offered a smile.
“Hi.” I glanced around. “Were you out with them today?”
“Yeah. One of the guys threw his shoulder out and can’t work. I’ve been helping out the last couple of days.”
What? Brody had been working with Mason, and he hadn’t said anything? Granted, we hadn’t exactly been talking but…
I looked at the crew walking around the boat and found Mason. He was stacking something up on deck, but his gaze was glued to me. His eyes flicked to Brody, then he turned away, looking none too happy.
“How have you been?” Brody asked.
“Good.”
He motioned toward my boat. “How long you been living out here?”
“A few months.”
“Everything okay?”
“Yeah, Charity is living with my parents for a while. It got crowded.”
He studied me a minute then nodded. “Well, if you ever need anything”—he lifted his cap and rubbed his hair down then settled it back on his head, bill facing forward now—“I’m here.”
He was being awfully chatty and talkative compared to last time. “Thanks.”
He stared down at his feet for a second then cleared his throat and locked his gaze on mine. “Do you think we could—”
Mason stepped off the boat and, as he walked past, grabbed my hand and placed a quick kiss on my head. “You’re off early.”
Brody’s gaze shot to Mason then came back to me, eyes filled with question.
I looked to Mason. “We finally got the new guy trained.”
“Cool. I’m going to finish up then I’ll be over.” Mason glanced back at Brody and walked off.
Brody picked up the cooler. “Guess I should get back to work.”
“Okay. See you around.” He walked past me, and I searched for Mason.
He stood talking with someone, but his gaze flicked over the guy’s shoulder, seeking me out. He glanced at Brody again then focused on the guy talking.
I headed to my boat and straight into the shower, not really sure what to make of the situation but ready to de-stress a bit.
After my shower I opened the fridge, searching for something to cook. I’d decided to make a salad when there was a knock at the door, followed by Mason walking in.
“You should really lock your door,” he grumbled.
I glanced at him, sensing he was in a
mood, and tried to lighten the situation. “Then how would you get in?”
“You’d open it.”
“So I should only lock it when I’m home?”
He plopped down on the couch and huffed. “You should lock it all the time. If you aren’t here, I can wait until you get back.”
I settled next to him on the couch. “What’s wrong?”
“What’s fucking right? We sleep in the same bed each night yet we’ve spoken like five words to each other. I’m stuck on a boat all day with your fucking ex, who, by the way, talks a whole fucking lot about you.” He scrubbed his hands over his eyes. “And I’m tired. Tired of whatever this is between us right now. Tired of listening to some other guy talk about you. Tired of this fucking job.”
I tucked my hands into my lap; a heaviness settled on my chest. “So what are you saying?”
He reached over and pulled me into his lap. “I’m saying that everything is shitty right now…but I tolerate it to be with you.”
“I didn’t ask you to tolerate anything.” I tried to squirm out of his lap.
He held me tight. “Wait, listen.”
But what more was there to say? What happened when he was tired of tolerating everything? Would he tire of me next?
“That came out the wrong way. Please, hear me out.”
With a huff, I stared directly at him.
“Work’s harder than I expected. I probably would’ve given up and told my uncle to find a replacement, if it hadn’t been for you. But I didn’t leave because every day I got off that boat, I had something to look forward to.” He ran his finger down my cheek. “I miss talking to you. I don’t really know what’s going on, but I don’t like this place we’re in.”
“Me either,” I admitted.
“So let’s figure out how to get out of it. If you’re unhappy, tell me. If you’re mad, tell me. Just talk to me.”
“I’m not unhappy. I’m not mad either. But I am confused.”
“About what?” he asked.
“My feelings.”
He took a deep breath then looked away. “Are you thinking this isn’t what you want anymore?”
“No, not at all.” I cupped his cheek and made him look at me. “It’s all those L-words that have me confused.”
He pulled me forward and kissed me. It was tender and sweet, and over all too soon. “I need to ask you something. And I need to know the truth. Don’t say what you think I want to hear, because what I want right now is honesty.”
He wasn’t going to make me spell it out, was he? Because I wasn’t ready to talk about love. I could admit that we might be headed there; I could even hint at it to him. But I wasn’t going to tell him I loved him. It was too soon and unconfirmed. Saying those words would be hard; having to take them back would be harder.
“It’s about Brody.”
Wait. What?
“If he wasn’t with that other girl, would you be with him?”
“If he wasn’t with her, he’d be away at college.”
“If he wasn’t. If he was here, right now, everything the same as it is, but he was single, would you want to be with him?”
“He’d never leave her.”
“Dammit, Felicity. Just answer the question. If Brody wasn’t with someone else, would you be with him?”
“With everything the same as it is now?”
“Yeah. He has a kid, but he’s single. Would you want to be with him?”
“No.” I shook my head to drive my point. “Because if everything is the same, then that means you’re in my life.”
“Say this isn’t about being faithful or hurting someone. Like if I gave you a choice. It’s a clean break. You could choose him or me, no hard feelings. Same answer?”
I studied him. What had Brody been saying on that boat? “Mason, I choose you. No matter how you lay it out. No matter what scenario you throw at me. You’re the one I want, you’re the one I love…” I quickly added, “Spending time with.”
His eyebrows pushed together, but then he seemingly dismissed the pause. “You should know that Brody’s separated from that girl and from what I gather, he wants you back.”
My lips parted. “What?”
“Things weren’t working out. She took the kid and moved in with her parents. They’ve decided to raise the baby separately.”
I narrowed my gaze. “What does that have to do with me? I’m not an object he can have.” I shook my head and stood. Then I paced around the small area in front of the couch. “I’m sorry things didn’t work out for them, and I’ll always care about him as a friend, but I’m not on standby. What makes him think I’d go back to him?”
I stared at Mason, who had the biggest grin on his face.
“What? Why is any of this funny?”
He tugged me back into his lap. “Because you’ve echoed all the thoughts that have been running through my mind these last three days.”
“Then clearly, you know me, the now me, better than he does.” I shifted to a straddling position and rested my hands on Mason’s shoulders. “Why didn’t you say something to him? About us.”
“I guess a part of me wasn’t sure what you’d want. I didn’t feel like it was my place to stake a claim on you. The other part of me didn’t want you all pissed off that I’d been talking about our relationship.”
I ran my fingers along the back of his neck. “You made it pretty clear we were together out there.”
He offered a sheepish grin. “Well, it was easy to take the high road in theory, but when I saw him talking to you, I said fuck it. I wasn’t handing you over without a fight.”
“I’m glad. Maybe now you won’t be subjected to any more discussions about it either.” I frowned. “I can’t believe he was talking about it in the first place.”
“It came up that first day that you lived here, then he started asking if you were okay and stuff. Which was fine. He cared enough to worry. I could see that. But then, every chance he got, he started talking Colby’s ear off about how different things were back with you. Colby would shoot me these looks, maybe expecting me to say something, but when I didn’t, I guess he took it as noninterest on my part. I don’t fucking know. But after that, he never put a stop to the conversations and then they got worse.” He leaned his head back and closed his eyes. “So much fucking worse.”
“Like how?”
He rubbed his hands over his eyes and shook his head. “Guys talk, Felicity. About a whole lot of shit we probably shouldn’t talk about. Stuff I don’t want to hear coming out of another guy’s mouth if it has anything to do with you.”
What the hell? “Like personal stuff?”
“He wasn’t going into detail or anything, or trying to be a dick, he was just…fuck…I don’t know, appreciative of what he had. With you. Apparently, everything was better with you.”
Warmth crept up my chest. A mixture of embarrassment and anger. “Why would he talk about that?”
“Colby’s his best friend; that’s what guys do.”
The heat made its way to my face.
“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have mentioned it.” He cupped my face and ran his thumbs over my cheeks. “Damn, you look like one of those cartoon characters right before their head explodes. You okay?”
I shook my head, stood and headed back into the kitchen to finish fixing dinner. “I’m sorry you heard that.”
“It’s okay.”
“He’s wrong, you know. However glorified he made it sound. Maybe my perspective is skewed, but that’s not how I recall it.” I pulled out a head of lettuce and a knife. “After you, everything seems mediocre.”
Mason walked over and leaned on the counter next to me. “Thanks. Even if you’re only saying that to make me feel better.”
I placed the lettuce on a cutting block and chopped it for salad. “I’m not just saying that. You were there. You should know. It wasn’t just sex. It was super freaking hot and unlike any other experience I’ve had.”
He grinned.
“Hearing you talk like that has me pretty turned on, but the way you’re murdering that lettuce has me kind of intimidated, as well.”
I laughed and set the knife down. “I’m sorry. I’m just so pissed. I can’t believe he was talking about any of this.”
“I really don’t think he was doing it to be an ass, honest. He was talking, thinking about the past.” Mason grabbed my hands and pulled me to his chest. “It just sucked to hear on my end and, if anything, I should be the one murdering the lettuce right now.” He tilted my chin up and kissed me. “Do you maybe have a tomato or something I can take my aggression out on?”
“Cucumber?”
“There’s some symbolism there. A little dark and disturbing, but I like it.”
Laughing, I pulled the cucumber out of the small refrigerator. “Have at it.”
He set it on the cutting block and picked up the knife. “You sure you don’t want to hack into this one?”
“It’s all you.”
I moved the lettuce to a big bowl then set it in front of Mason, who was moving the cucumber around the cutting board, seemingly unsure where to start. “You’re supposed to be murdering it, not trying to score a second date.”
“I’m going to be honest. It feels a little barbaric.”
I bit back a smile. “Okay, well, when you’re done sweet-talking the cucumber, will you coax it into the salad bowl for me?”
“Why? You going to toss it for me?”
“Yes, Mason. I’m going to toss your salad.”
He rubbed his chin. “Okay, why not.”
I nudged him out of the way and started cutting the cucumber myself. “Stop corrupting my dinner.”
“Hey.” He wrapped his arms around my waist. “I’m just helping. I have no idea what you’re talking about.” His face dipped into the crook of my neck as he brushed his lips over my skin, and his hand dipped into my shorts. His fingers skimmed over my panties, making their way between my thighs. “I like helping.” His other hand went to mine and set the knife I’d been holding down. “But first we need to get rid of the weapon.”
Just a Little Kiss Page 20
