by Bret Tallent
***
Gary looked up only briefly with mild interest as he heard the whine of a snowmobile blow past. "They're hauling ass.” he thought to himself absently, and then pulled his concentration back to what he was doing. On the coffee table in front of him lay the cross-bow and its bolts. He paused long enough to admire it one more time, and then focused on the snowshoe that was giving him so much trouble.
He'd been over it a hundred times; there was just no way to test-fire the thing inside. All he needed was to put a hole through something or bury a bolt up to its tail feathers in the wall. Then his mom really would pitch a fit. So Gary decided to try it out in the alley behind the Diner. He could take a couple of pot shots at that butt-head, Ray's, garbage cans. Then he would just stash the thing in the alley and sneak in the back to meet his mom for lunch. It was a plan.
Gary finally got the strap to fit and yanked it snug. Satisfied, he nodded and stood. It was a strange feeling and he felt unsteady at first. But as he got used to the awkward things, he was soon sliding around the apartment with ease. Finally ready to face the great outdoors, he rounded up his new toy. He placed all but one of the bolts into a plastic grocery store bag and slipped the hand holds over one wrist. Next, Gary cocked the bow and placed the remaining bolt in the guide slot.
He sat the bow back down on the table and donned his parka and gloves. Lastly, he shoved his sunglasses onto his face and pulled up his hood. He leaned down awkwardly and scooped up the cross-bow, holding the bolt in place with his thumb, and headed for the door. His shoes clacked on the hard floor and his ski-bib swished as he walked, but it was all lost in the wail of the wind as he eased out into the storm.
It was much colder than it had looked. The cold bit at him through his clothes and the snow stung the exposed parts of his face. Gary knew that he would not be able to stay out in this for long, and he didn't really want to. He walked as quickly as he could on the soft surface, the snowshoes keeping him from sinking more than a few inches. Even so, it was slow and awkward going, and by the time he had reached the end of the building near the alley, he was winded.
Gary paused there for a moment to catch his breath and survey his surroundings. He couldn't see much, and what he could see was only vaguely familiar. The tall fence that lined one side of the alley was only a foot or so tall now, and completely covered over with snow in some places. The drift against it angled down sharply toward the building though and made it nearly impossible to go that way. So Gary decided to skirt the fence and come up behind the dumpsters.
He trudged through the snow with his head down and his hands tucked up close to his body, the crossbow held snug against him. Eyes trained on the fence top, he followed it until it abruptly ended. Or rather, a huge drift had ended it for him. Gary looked at it amazed, a wall of snow between two buildings that surely must have been fifteen or twenty feet high. Just above the top of the drift, Gary could make out the indentation of a second floor window in the building that housed the Diner.
Past the drift, the fence top continued on, and to Gary's surprise he could make out the alley below. The snow here was not piled up nearly so deep and only about two feet covered the alley itself. A lucky break, Gary thought. He could see the back door to the Diner, and a little further down, a dark form that he knew was another window. Below that was the cover to a coal chute. Gary had noticed that most of the older buildings up in this area had them, though few of them were still used.
Gary thought for a moment, then sat down on the fence top and pulled the snowshoes off. The bindings were frozen and he had to work at them a bit, but finally he got them. He dropped them down into the alley and they stuck in the snow there. Then he eased the crossbow as far down as he could and let it fall. It sank in the snow but was undamaged. Next, Gary lowered himself over the side and let go of the fence. He dropped a couple of feet, never even slowing as he hit the snow.
When Gary touched hard earth he fell backward and landed on his butt. He grunted a curse then struggled up to his knees and leaned over to grab his snowshoes and the bow. With them in hand, he stood and turned to look down the alley. At the far end of the alley, he could barely make out the dark shape of the dumpster. It was half buried but it would serve just fine as a target, Gary thought, "And the ass hole will never know the difference.” he nodded.
Gary was already freezing, and his little drift dive hadn't helped any, so he decided to dispense with any formalities. He raised the bow, pointed it in the general direction, and squeezed the trigger. The bow snapped and jerked in his hands, and the bolt was gone. A split second later he heard a muffled “thunk.”
Gary stumbled down the alley eagerly. After a few moments of searching, he found the hole, it had gone clean through. Awesome! The thing was awesome. It had gone clear through one side and maybe even the other. Gary looked around at the dumpster and decided he wasn't going to find out if it had today. The entire back side of the dumpster was set in the side of another huge drift like the one at the other end of the alley. In fact, as he turned and looked, he realized that he was in a sort of trench, formed by snow.
He walked back to the door and tried it, locked. "Damn!” he said aloud. He tried it again but it was still locked. He looked at the window, but it had a steel mesh over it. "Like there's anything in there worth stealing.” he mumbled to himself. "Damn.", he said again, then kicked the coal chute cover. He looked down at it then turned and looked around the alley. There was no way he was climbing out, that was for sure. So he looked back down at the chute with a look in his eyes. The same look he'd gotten when he saw a crossbow in a weapons book he'd read once.
The cover had two doors that met in the center and were held together with a lock. Gary thought for a moment. There was no way he was going to break that lock. But the doors were wood and he might be able to pry the latch off of them. So Gary looked at what he had. The snowshoes wouldn't work, not strong enough. Neither were the cross-bow bolts. The cross-bow itself might work, but it was awkward and the bow string might get in the way. But he had nothing else.
So Gary worked and wiggled and worked some more until he had one end of the bow slid in beneath the lock. He twisted it up so that he had some leverage with the stock, and prepared himself. He gripped the stock tightly and rocked, one, two, and three... and shoved forward with all of his might. The latch ripped out of the rotting wood and Gary flew face first into the doors, catching his lip on the butt of his bow.
"Fuck! Son of a bitch! You mutha...” he cursed out. Already he could feel his lip thickening, and taste the warm blood in his mouth. He reached down and grabbed a handful of snow and shoved it up to his mouth. It stung for a moment then eased away the pain. Gary threw the reddened snow down and spit a couple of times. "Some day.” he thought, not amused.
His belongings gathered up, Gary opened up the doors to the chute and peered inside. It was a big black hole. Even though he'd been wearing his sunglasses, the brightness of the snow had dimmed his vision and all he could see was a big black hole. So Gary eased the snowshoes in and probed with them. There seemed to be a slide or ramp there, so he let them go.
Then he let the bow go and there were no loud crashes, so he assumed the ramp was intact. Gary eased himself over the side and let his feet dangle. They rested on the ramp surface and he kicked it several times. It seemed sturdy enough, and Gary was in no position to argue. He eased his butt down onto the slide, holding onto the doors for support.
"What the hell?” he muttered, and let go. He slid down on his back side and came to an abrupt stop on a pile of musty, dusty newspapers, one snowshoe digging into his thigh. Above him the doors slammed shut and blocked out most of the light from this dismal little cave. Gary sneezed once from the dust then coughed.
He pulled off his glasses and squinted as he peered around the room. As his eyes slowly adjusted, he could make out only shapes and forms and shadows. He trembled then, it was spooky. Then an eerie feeling came over him. It was a feeling that something evil
was closing in on him. That something very bad was very near, and getting nearer. He trembled again. Then the feeling subsided and was eventually gone altogether. Gary sighed and shook his head. Then he set about exploring this cave.
Above Gary, a shadow passed over the coal chute doors. It moved quickly by and was gone. Had Gary seen it, he might have screamed out for help. He might have.
***
Sarah sat before the huge cold hearth in a daze. The Mineshaft had been empty but what she had found was far worse than she was prepared for. Blood, there was so much blood. It was everywhere, even splattered on the high ceilings in some rooms. It was on the walls and the floor, smeared here and pooled there. Bed linens had been shredded and soaked in it. The feathers from pillows were stuck in it and frozen there.
Sarah's mind started reeling and she couldn't get the awful color out of her head. She leaned over then and vomited for the third time, only this time there was nothing left to come up. Her insides were twisting around in knots and her mouth tasted like bile, but her stomach was empty. She sat back down on the splintered remains of a sofa and hugged herself, rocking back and forth, a vacant expression on her face.
Absent mindedly she thrust her gloved hands into the pockets of her ski coat and rested her chin on her knees. She sat there staring off into space, past where her goggles lie on the floor, past the darkened fireplace. Sarah began thinking of a place far from where she was. A different time and how she wished she was there, a warm place where the sun could find her face. She found a place in her mind where she was in control.
***
Sarah adjusted her bikini slightly, its neon green a stark contrast to her tanned skin. Part of her chest and tops of her shoulders were freckled slightly but the rest of her skin was unblemished. She finished adjusting the creeping garment then reached down beside the lounge and fumbled for her Mojito without looking. Finding it, she brought it up and finished it in several swallows. Its fruity flavor filled her mouth, the bubbles tickling her nose lightly.
She sat the empty glass down with a hollow clink then rested her arms back at her sides to maximize the sun striking her. Off to her right she could hear laughter and splashing from the pool, but she closed her eyes and ignored it. The sun was warm and it made her sleepy but she relished in it. Sarah spent every spare moment by the pool, working on her tan. She even came home at lunch to catch what rays she could. Of course, working only a half mile from her apartment helped.
Sarah loved the sun. It was warm and comforting, and full of life. And those people who never saw any, who were pale and wan, all looked sickly to Sarah. She was one of those that equated the golden tan to health, no matter what the doctors said. Skin cancer this and melanoma that, hell, if you listened to all those doctors, you wouldn't do anything----and even if it was all true, she loved the sun anyway. Beneath her Ray-Bans she opened her eyes momentarily to make sure it was still there, and then closed them again quickly.
To her left, Sarah heard the fart, sputter, pop of suntan lotion being squeezed from a bottle. Lazily, she rolled her head to look and saw Danny staring at a handful of white glop. Sarah smiled and Danny looked up just then to catch her doing so. He shrugged his shoulders and started rubbing it on his arms and hairless chest.
"So sue me. I'm Mister Whitey and I don't want to burn.” he defended.
"No,” Sarah replied, "you just look like one of those tourists from New Jersey."
"Oh, you mean the ones who wear brown socks with their sandals?"
"That's them."
"That's cold."
"That's life."
They grinned at each other sheepishly then laid back and enjoyed the day. It was a typical New Mexico summer day. The sky was a rich blue mottled here and there by a few wandering clouds, a brilliant white against the sharp backdrop. The Sandia Mountains rose abruptly to the east, a great granite wall separating Albuquerque from that part of the world. A mild breeze meandered down from those rugged peaks and cooled the city below. And even though it was in the nineties, it was comfortable.
Soon their shadows were long and Sarah could feel the cool of the high desert night beginning to creep in. She sat up and began to collect her things when she caught the scent of someone barbecuing. Her stomach growled in reply. "Hey", she said to Danny, "do you wanna grill some steaks?"
Danny sat up and nodded, "That'd be great, I'm starved. You ran me ragged today, Old Town, the Tram, forcing me to lay out here and relax like this. You should be ashamed.” he scolded.
"Oh, I am, I am c'mon, let's go." Sarah was up with her towel and empty bottles in hand moving towards the gate to the pool area. Behind her she could hear Danny gathering his things as well. She climbed the stairs to her apartment and had her jeans pulled up over her bikini before Danny made it through the door. She was just throwing on an old shirt as Danny entered.
"That was fast!” he exclaimed upon entering. "Are you a professional, or is this just a hobby?"
"Years of shopping.” she stated truthfully. Danny moved past her and into the bathroom to change. He could hear cabinet doors slamming and dishes rattling in the room beyond. He thought about her. Boy was she beautiful. He'd had the biggest crush on her in high school, and seven years later he felt it all over again. He was so glad he had taken the time to track her down yesterday.
"Hey! Did you fall in!?"
"Huh? Oh, no. I'm just getting respectable.” he yelled back.
"It would take a lot more than what I have in the bathroom to make you respectable."
Danny smiled. It was amazing how comfortable they felt around each other, but he realized that it was Sarah that was the catalyst. She set the rules for the relationship, she set the tone. She decided on the boundaries and the penalty lines, and Danny liked that about her as well. As he tucked in his shirt, he wished he'd kept in touch with her all along. Maybe things would have been different.
Maybe his and her lives would have worked out entirely different. Danny chided himself; he was acting like a lovelorn post-pubescent zit marker. They were adults now, and engaging in a reunion, that was all. He certainly didn't want to ruin anything they had achieved by overreacting. He finished dressing and sauntered into the kitchen where Sarah had a couple of steaks thawing in the microwave. Danny crept up behind her and startled her.
"Oh shit!” she jumped. Turning to swat him with the towel she was holding, "You ass!" Then she pushed him away, "Go and fire up the grill, before any one else beats you to it." Sarah didn't wait for a reply; she turned and began retrieving vegetables from the refrigerator. Again she kept in control of the situation. She had read it on his face several times today and skirted it well. Danny wanted to be close to her, a lot closer than she was ready for, or wanted.
Sarah had been very cautious towards men after the divorce and it was a year later before she actually dated. She was somewhat gun shy that was true, but more than that, she was trying to get her life in order. Trying to get it under control and the fact was Danny was just an old friend from her past.
But, in seeing him again, it was like an old part of herself that she had lost had been returned. Like a piece that was missing was there again and made her whole. Memories and people she had forgotten were fresh again. It was a nice little vacation she decided, but that was all it was. She had her life going a certain direction now and didn't want to risk a detour, as pleasant and charming as it might seem.
So they had their dinner and talked well into the night, it was a nice visit. Finally, Danny said his farewells and left Sarah alone; he had to catch a flight back to Denver the next morning. Sarah was really glad he had looked her up though, and she wondered briefly about other people she had gone to school with. Then, several days later she received an email from Danny. It made her smile, and then it made her cry. It made her think about her life.
My Dearest Sarah,
Seeing you stirred many old feelings which I thought were abandoned years ago. Feelings and memories not only of you, but of the many othe
r old friends which I have neglected to communicate with over the years. I can safely say that I feel a sense of profound loss for not pursuing the question, "What ever happened to?"
It seems peculiar how someone views his/her progress over time, in relation to the triumphs or failures of past friends and your expectations of them. However, when you are reunited, these issues become irrelevant. Sharing the moment and the spirit of the person far exceeds any imagined expectations. Perhaps this is the purist meaning of the word "friend". But I believe the most important aspect of our meeting was being able to be spontaneous and responsive in a non-intrusive or calculating manner, a quality that I had misplaced years ago.
I feel sorry for the tragedies that have happened to you over the last several years, but it seems that you have done well. However, I cannot help but sense that somewhere in your life there is a great deal of pain. Perhaps I'm wrong, but I would like to extend this offer to you, since you helped me realize some things about myself. When ever you feel you need a friend to talk to, think of me first.
Well, I guess I should be going for now. Take care of yourself (somehow I know you always will). I would just like to say thanks for taking the time from your daily schedule to share a few memories. May good fortune remain always on your side.
Thinking of You
Danny
P.S. My ankles really got sunburned, now I know why people from New Jersey wear brown socks with their sandals.....
Sarah sat on her sofa with her knees pulled tight against her chest and her arms wrapped around her legs. She rested the side of her face on her knees and stared down at the email on her iPad on the cushion next to her. Her eyes were glassy but she didn't cry again, she only stared. She stared and thought. She thought about her life and how it hadn't turned out like she'd expected. She thought about her father and how much she missed him. Then she thought about her uncle and how much he was like her dad.
