“Oh no, I told you. We’re goin’ for a ride on the bike, so get your ass out front.” He left no room for negotiations.
“But Jax, I’m pregnant. I don’t think it’s safe.” I was no longer just scared to death of road rash. I had this tiny human to take into consideration.
“You’ll be fine. We’re only goin’ a few miles and you’ll be in good hands. Enough bullshittin’, let’s go.” He opened the front door and walked out. I grumbled and huffed as I shut and locked the door.
Once out front, I walked over to the black Shadow Rocket, where Jaxon held out a helmet to me. It was an all-black half helmet with a faint grey skull airbrushed on the top.
“Here, I brought this for ya. I had a feelin’ you’d use it as an excuse to not ride with me.”
I put it on and tried to adjust the chin strap. “Where’s yours?”
He looked at me like I had just insulted him. “That’s mine,” he said nodding up to the helmet covering my head. “I only wear that shit on rides when we go through states that have helmet laws.”
“Oh.” I wanted to tell him he was stupid and as a trauma nurse just how many guys I had seen in the ER that would have lived if they had been wearing a helmet. But I wasn’t in the mood to argue and I really wanted some French toast. Oh, and some turkey bacon. I loved turkey bacon.
He threw his long, thick leg over the bike, sat down and then looked back at me. “What are you waitin’ for? Hop on.”
Fuck, how did I get on without looking like a complete moron? I put my right hand on Jaxon’s right shoulder, lifted my left leg awkwardly and almost lost my balance. This felt all wrong. I rode horses for years and always mounted from the left.
“Fuck that.” I walked around to the other side, put my foot on the peg, grabbed Jaxon’s shoulders and popped up there like it was a quarter horse. I smiled, proud of myself. “Much better.”
Jaxon just shook his head and started the bike. I was ready for the loud roar of the engine, but I wasn’t ready for the vibration between my legs. Whoa!
“Wrap your arms around me and hold on princess.”
I had to scoot forward and press my chest to his back in order to get my arms around his wide torso. My thighs hugged his ass and my hands felt his taut abs. I was so tempted to rub my hands up and down them to count just how many he had in his pack. I’m guessing six, but as ripped and cut as he felt, he might even have had the elusive eight, but there was no way I was going to find out.
“Feel somethin’ ya like?” He turned his head back toward me with a smirk.
“Just drive Jax.” I shook my head and rolled my eyes.
He leaned the bike slightly, kicked the stand back and off we flew. I held on for dear life, closing my eyes, too scared to look until we slowed down at the first light. I looked around to get my bearings and he took off again. As we rode, I started to relax and actually opened my eyes. I hate to admit it, but he was right. The way the wind felt against my skin was almost freeing. The cool air on the warm day was refreshing and most welcomed after the shit-show of a day I had Saturday. I laid my head on his back remembering the look in Brody’s eyes. I wanted to forget. I wanted to erase the last three months and pretend like I wasn’t totally and utterly in love with that raging asshole pile of shit, but God had other plans for me. He left me with a piece of Brody. A piece I would carry for nine months and love for the rest of my life. Brody couldn’t take that away, not like he took himself and his love away from me.
We pulled into the parking lot of Toast, which I’d never been to before, but Jaxon said it had the best breakfast around. We got inside and were seated, and as we looked over the menu, the waitress came over.
“Good morning folks, what can I get y’all to drink? Bottomless mimosas are only fourteen dollars and a great way to start out the day.” She was an older lady with a thick Charlestonian accent.
“God, a mimosa sounds really good.” I wasn’t actually planning on ordering one, just stating a fact but I guess Jaxon didn’t realize that.
“Oh fuck no, you’re pregnant babe. You can’t drink anymore,” he said and glared at me.
“Would you chill the hell out, I didn’t order one. I just said it sounded good. I’m well aware of the fact that I’m pregnant, you Neanderthal. Geesh.”
“Congratulations. Is this y’all’s first baby?”
We both answered at the same time.
He said yes while I said no.
I turned to the waitress who looked really confused. “Sorry, I’ll just have a large OJ and a water.”
“Same, thanks,” Jax said. I could feel him staring at me, but I kept looking at the menu.
“So what are you getting?” I asked without looking up.
“You wanna talk about what just happened?”
“I don’t know what you’re talkin’ about.” Yep, just plays dumb Leila, smart.
“’Kay. Fine. You wanna tell me what happened since I left ya last night?” His hooded eyes bored unrelentingly into me as I looked up at him.
I exhaled a loud, long drawn-out breath. “Fine. What do you want first? My horrible morning or the waitress’s loaded question?”
“Waitress, first. I shouldn’t have answered the way I did. I wasn’t thinking about it being our first child, just that it’s your first child. It is, isn’t it?” he asked curiously.
I didn’t read anything into his question. “Yes, first pregnancy, and first baby.”
“So now that that’s settled, wanna explain your horrible morning?” He was not going to let it go. He was like a rabid dog with a bone.
“Do I have to?” I picked my menu back up.
Silence.
I guess that was a resounding yes. Great. “Before I say anything, remember we are in a restaurant. Okay?”
“No promises baby girl,” he said with his teeth clenched.
“Just before you got to my place there was a knock at the door. I thought it was you, so I opened it and said you were early, but it wasn’t you.” I pulled the menu back up, pretending to look it over. “It was him…Brody.”
“He has some fuckin’ balls just fuckin’ showin’ up. What’d he want?” His words came out like daggers.
“He brought over the dresses he bought me and some other things.” Jax groaned. “I told him to keep them for his next bed warmer, that I didn’t want anything he gave me. I asked him not to come by anymore, that it was too hard to see him. He, of course, said he was sorry. Which is when I told him if he was really sorry he wouldn’t be doing this to me.”
A low growl came from Jaxon just before he slammed his menu down on the table. “I’m sorry, he’s such a fuckin’ piece ’a shit. You deserve so much better. He should be thanking God right now, I didn’t see his pathetic ass this morning.” The fury rolled off of him in waves.
Our waitress came back to take our order. “What can I get y’all for breakfast?”
“I’ll have the French toast with bacon, please.”
Jaxon picked up his menu and handed it to the waitress. “I’ll have the corned beef hash and eggs, over medium, with toast.”
She scribbled down our orders, took our menus with a smile and went to the back.
“Jax, please don’t. I know what you’re thinking, but it won’t change anything. Maybe he just needs time to come around. Maybe after a couple of weeks he will.” I stopped myself. I was hoping he would come crawling back and beg me to take him back. Would I? If he came back, would I be able to forgive him? “I don’t know, but I don’t want you doing anything to him. Please. For me?”
He sat quietly, emerald eyes tense, brow wrinkled. Then he finally agreed. “Fine. For now, I won’t do anything.”
“And you won’t have anyone else do anything,” I added wanting to be sure.
“Yeah. Man, that prick’s lucky. Here he up and dumped you, while you’re pregnant with his baby, and you’re still defendin’ him.”
“Whoa, I’m not defending him. I just don’t want anything to happen to h
im. There’s a huge difference.”
“All right, let’s change subjects. What’re you gonna do today?”
“Well, other than breakfast with you, not a whole lot. I have an ultrasound appointment at eleven thirty but that’s about it.” I took out my phone to check the time. It was only 9:15.
“You gonna go alone?” he asked in a sympathetic voice.
“Yep, that’s the plan. I already saw the OB last week and she did a quick scan in the office, but this is to get a measurement to see exactly how far along I am. No big deal.” I tried to play it off.
Our breakfast arrived before he could say anything. I was starving and dug right in. Yum, the French toast was out of this world good.
“Mmm, this is delicious. How is yours?” I looked over to his plate that was damn near empty. “Wow, hungry were ya?”
“Yeah, I didn’t eat much yesterday.” He shoveled more corned beef and eggs in.
We finished our meal and Jaxon insisted on paying. I let him, with minimal fussing. I just didn’t have the energy to argue with him. We left the restaurant and climbed back on his bike, keeping my eyes open all the way home. And damn if he wasn’t right, I was starting to enjoy this.
We got back to my place about 10:00 and I invited him in. I really didn’t want to be alone right now. I knew once 11:30 rolled around I would feel lonelier than I had felt since my mom died. The thought opened a floodgate of emotions that I didn’t want to deal with right now. So I did what I do best and I buried it.
“So I have to leave in about an hour, wanna just watch some TV and talk?” I walked over and let Ruger out back.
“Sounds good to me. Whatcha wanna talk about?” he asked as he sat down on the large sectional.
“We talked about what I do and what you do now, but we’ve never really talked about what you did as a Marine.” I wasn’t sure if he would even want to talk about that time in his life.
“Don’t take this the wrong way, but I don’t talk about it.” He shut down real fast. His eyes got dark and his shoulders tensed. Okay, touchy subject.
“Sorry, I just wondered where all you were stationed. I’ve always wanted to travel.” I place my hand on my abdomen. “Guess I won’t really get that chance now, huh.”
“Leila, people travel with kids all the time. You’ll still be able to travel.” He paused, thinking. “If you could go anywhere, where would you go?”
“Anywhere?” I thought for a second. “I would love to go to Hawaii, or Egypt. I want to see the pyramids and the Sphinx. I’m so fascinated by ancient Egypt.”
He laughed. “So mummies and hieroglyphics?”
I just smiled and shook my head. “Oh, and Bora Bora. I love the pictures of the blue water. I’ve always wanted to stay in one of those little tiki huts, out over the water.” My eyes widen at the thought.
“You’ll go one day. Just ’cause you’re havin’ a baby doesn’t mean you can’t still go places.” He made it sound so easy.
“It’s not that easy Jaxon.” I pulled my knees up to my chest. “Money’s gonna be tight. I mean, I make decent money, but as a single mom, it’s not going to be easy, ya know? It’s not like I have parents I can ask to keep the baby for me.”
“Leila, I’ll be here. I’ll help you as much as you want me to.” He turned to look at me. “And you will get help from that asshole. He’s more than financially capable—”
“No Jaxon. I don’t want a goddamned thing from him. If I take his money, then he will be entitled to see the baby. So no, I won’t be asking Brody for anything.” I turned back to face the TV. “I’ll have a plan in place with Barb and Drew, once I tell him. I do appreciate your offer to help out though. It’s very sweet of you and I may even take you up on it.” I was touched by his offer. “But if our friendship is going to remain intact, you can’t bring him up anymore. I don’t want anything from him and you mentioning him doesn’t help me to move past this.”
“Got it,” he said and nodded.
We watched HGTV quietly and before I knew it, the reminder on my phone was going off. It was time to chug twenty-four ounces of water. First, I needed to pee. I swear, I spent more time in my bathroom over the last week than I probably had in the last four years I had lived here. I felt like I had the bladder of a four year old. I ran off to the bathroom, then the kitchen for a bottle of water. When I came back to the living room, Jaxon stood up and turned off the TV.
“I need to head out. Gotta get over to the hospital for my appointment. Thanks for everything Jax.” I smiled and put my arms around his waist.
He bent down and kissed the top of my head. “Call me later, ’kay?”
“Will do. Thanks for being here and listenin’.”
“Anytime princess.” He winked.
I locked the door after he closed it. Set the alarm and went out the back to the Challenger.
Chapter Three
~Leila~
Pulling into the parking garage off Bee Street I found a spot on the third level. Finishing my water on the way, I got to the Prenatal Wellness Center with ten minutes to spare. I hated being late. I pulled the door open and walked into the waiting area, signed in and took a seat. Grabbing my phone, I sent a text to Drew telling him I needed to talk to him and asked him when he could come over. I also sent Barb a text and told her that the weekend was almost the worst of my life and that Brody and I were over. Immediately I got a text back from Barb but replied that I was busy and would call her later.
Ugh, I needed to pee…again. Damn you tiny baby for hijacking my bladder. I hoped they weren’t running late, I didn’t know how long I can hold it. I uncrossed and recrossed my legs.
“I don’t think that’s gonna help,” a deep voice said to me. I looked up and saw Jaxon’s smiling face.
“What are you doing here?” I was surprised to see him.
He sat down next to me. “I didn’t want you to go through this alone. I knew you didn’t want to ask¸ so I followed you.”
I started to silently cry, words stuck in my throat.
“If I was wrong, I can leave. Shit, Lei, don’t cry. I’ll go.” He stood to leave, but I grabbed his hand.
“No, don’t go. I’m not crying because of that, I’m happy that you’re here. Thank you.” I pulled him back into the seat. Well, he let me. I knew better than to think I could make him do anything. He kept my hand in his and gave it a small squeeze of encouragement. “Even if you’re kind of a stalker,” I said with a giggle.
“I was serious when I said I’d be here for ya. Not all men…never mind.” He stopped himself before berating Brody again. “All you have to do is ask, I’ll always make time for ya.”
“So if I have a two a.m. craving for peanut butter and pickles I can call you?” I grinned, testing our friendship.
“Woman, if you call my ass at two in the morning it better not be for a food craving.” His eyes said more than his words. I felt a burst of arousal come out of nowhere. “Peanut butter and pickles?” He made a sour face.
“Leila Matthews,” a nurse called. I stood and she held the door.
I looked back at Jax, still sitting in the chair, cocked my head and said, “Are you comin’? Or are you gonna hold my hand from out here?”
“Uh, I can go back with ya?” he asked with uncertainty painted across his face.
“Yes, of course, Daddy,” the nurse said before I could answer him.
“Uh, he’s—” Jaxon stopped me.
“I’m just a little nervous, that’s all,” he said and gave me this weird look.
“Y’all can follow me, we are gonna go right in here. Ms. Matthews, please undress from the waist down, use the sheet to cover up and I’ll be back in just a minute.” She shut the door as she walked out. The room was dim and small. There was a blue exam table, pink chair, ultrasound machine and a large flat screen mounted near the foot of the exam table.
“Uh, I’ll just turn around.” Jaxon suddenly really did look nervous. “About what the nurse said, I didn’t want
her thinking you were here alone. Ya know without the dad, like some teenager or some shit.”
“Jax, while I appreciate the sentiment, the truth is I am here without the dad. He’s not gonna be here for any of these. I don’t care what anyone thinks of me.” I undressed and hopped up on the table. “Now, can you open the door so she’ll come in here and do this scan before I pee myself?”
He opened the door and the ultrasound tech came in immediately.
“We’ll do the abdominal first, then you can use the bathroom and then we’ll do the transvaginal. Any questions?” she asked as she was setting up the machine.
“Nope, I’m good. Jaxon?” I looked over at him.
“Uh, nah.”
“This shouldn’t be cold, just a little slimy.” She squirted the Aquasonic blue goo on my belly and started rubbing the transducer around. I lay there staring up at the TV and all I could think about was that if she pushed much harder I would be really embarrassed. All of the sudden, like a snowy TV picture getting clear, the baby appeared.
“Oh, there’s y’all’s little peanut. I’ll just take a few quick pictures, then you can empty your bladder,” she said as she clicked away on the keyboard.
“Holy shit Lei, I can actually see it.” Jaxon was amazed by the technology. “How big is it?”
“I’ll be able to get a measurement with the transvaginal wand.” She wiped the gel off my belly. “You can use the bathroom now.”
“Oh, thank you sweet baby Jesus.” I gripped the sheet and jumped down and almost careened right into Jaxon. Luckily, there was a bathroom between each of the rooms. Ahhh, sweet relief. I washed my hands and went back out to the exam table.
“If you could place your feet in the stirrups.” She got the wand ready. I lay down, put my feet in the stirrups and slid down so my butt was hanging off. I looked over to where Jax was still sitting in the chair, but was now wide-eyed.
“Wait, whatcha doing with—” He stopped as the tech gently slid the wand into my vagina and the screen came to life again. “Oh holy shit, you just put that whole thing up there?”
I burst out laughing. “No Jax, just a little and then she moves it around to see my uterus and the baby. It’s okay, it doesn’t hurt.”
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