by Stan Mason
Paula knocked on Waverley’s door and they went down to the hotel restaurant to eat a hearty English breakfast and then they went for a stroll along the wide promenade running alongside the rich sandy beach. They came to some stone seats and Paula indicated that they should sit down together for a brief rest.
‘I was reading a magazine this morning,’ she told him, staring out to sea. ‘It related to a nearby place called Vila Joyosa, an old fishing village from the early eighteen hundreds. Apparently, the fishermen would go out in their vessels for the catch and, when they had hauled up all their nets with the fish, they would celebrate very solidly with bottles of wine on their way home. When they arrived back, they were so well-and-truly drunk they couldn’t remember where they lived. Consequently, some of them went into the houses of other fishermen and, being drunk, were full of romance. Naturally, this offended many husbands, for obvious reasons, so they finally came to a solution. They painted the houses of each fisherman a strikingly different colour so that each of them could recognise which one he had to go to when the vessels returned. Don’t you think that’s clever? To this day, the houses in Vila Joyosa are all painted a different colour to remind them of the old days.’
‘Very clever,’’ he responded although he was not very interested in idle chatter or details of local history.
‘I’ve not seen you smile today, Neil,’ she submitted thoughtfully.
‘There’s not much to smile about,’ he retorted almost indignantly.
‘Then let me tell you a joke,’ she went on, still staring out to sea. ‘A very young man and woman go for a ride in the country with his father’s car. They stop at a lonely place and he suggests that they strip naked and dance around the car. The do so leaving their clothes in the car which has an automatic remote control to open and close it on the key . Unfortunately, the young man treads on it and it breaks so they can’t get back into the car to get their clothes. He suggests that she goes to a garage about a mile back to get assistance. Naturally she baulks at the idea because she is naked so he takes off one of his shoes and tells her to use it to cover up her most private part. She takes in an puts it over her fanny before going off to the garage. When she gets there, she looks at the attendant and says: ‘Can you help my boyfriend out?’ ‘Sorry,’ says the man. ‘He’s too far in!’ She bursts out laughing at her own joke but Waverley appeared failed to be amused,
‘I don’t like profane language,’ he uttered miserably.
‘Profane?’ she countered in a firm tone. ‘Are you referring to the word ‘fanny’?’
‘Yes... if you must know.’
‘Oh, for Heaven’s sake!’ she reproached sharply. ‘Don’t be such a prude. Lighten up a little. You’re far too straight, Neil Waverley, You act like a stolid banker. Ease up!’
He remained silent and looked out at a large rock resting some distance away in the sea. ‘They say that the rock was thrown by a giant who lived in the mountains and became angry because the woman he loved rejected him.’
‘I should imagine there’s a lot of myths about ghosts, ghouls., spirits, Gods and the like everywhere.’
‘To tell you the truth, Paula,’ he went on glumly. ‘You’ve proved to be a complete enigma to me. I know your intention is to help me but I don’t understand you half the time.’
‘I’m delighted to hear that,’ she responded. ‘Every woman likes to have some kind of mystique.’
‘I really don’t know what you want with me. Is it love and romance... if so, it’s out of the question? I’m too badly scarred at the moment to think about another woman. Is it money? Well I have some but not enough to satisfy someone who wants to rip me off. Is it simply a place to live? No it can’t be that. You’ve already agreed I should sell the house. You seem to like my company but that isn’t sufficient reason for you to be with me. So what is it?’ Before she could reply he reminisced the situation and continued talking. ‘You turn up at my house after my wife has left me. You keep telling me you want to talk with me in private yet here we are and you haven’t said a word. You’ve told me you have a plan but I’ve no idea what it is. To be utterly and completely frank, you talk in riddles like a mad woman. Now you’ve dragged me off to Spain...’
’Dragged you!’ she countered angrily. ’I haven’t dragged you anywhere! Have you finished because I have something to say!’
’No!’ he interrupted. ’I haven’t finished! I don’t even know you except that you’re a member of the same dramatic society as myself. You’re practically a stranger to me but I agreed, reluctantly, to come to Spain with you. I have no idea why I should have done that. No idea at all!’
She paused for a moment before speaking seeming to be hurt by his onslaught. ’Don’t you like me?’ The question was short and clear.
’What are you talking about?’ he remonstrated. ‘What’s that got to do with anything. I’m a married man...’
‘Not in my books you’re not,’ she interrupted abruptly. ‘And even if you are, your wife will be divorcing you or vice versa. I’ll be candid with you, Neil. I like you and I’d like a relationship with you but I realise it’s going to take time. You need to get over your wife leaving you. But there’s one thing I’ll say, your mind’s dwelling on the wrong thing. You feel aggrieved that your wife left you. That’s not the case at all. You can get over that in a relatively short space of time. What’s eating you like a cancer is that she deceived you and had an affair with another man. Now if you can get over that problem you’ll be home and dry. You think about it.’
He looked at her briefly to scan her face and then stared out to the rock in the sea. She was right. He and Elizabeth had been growing apart for many months, therefore leaving him would not be such a dramatic event in their lives. They had become irritable with each other, often arguing, and their closeness no longer existed. As a result, when she left him, he would soon be able to pick up the pieces of his life and carry on. However, it was the deceit and her affair with another man that ate into his mind. Why should he concern himself with that fact? He didn’t really know. Perhaps it was guilt of his own poor performance sexually in their marriage that gnawed at his brain. Maybe it was his negligence to show more interest in his wife. Or it could be the way of many marriages where one partner decides to have an affair with someone else to brighten up their lives. Indiscretions of that kind happened on a daily basis to thousands of married people. Paula was right. He needed to divest himself of that particular problem... the fact that she had deceived him. It was only his pride that stood in the way.
He began to view Paula as his mentor from that moment onwards. She had found the solution to his troubles and now he could work on it. Maybe she wasn’t as mad as he had thought... just someone very extrovertial... someone different in concept to his dull existence. When he thought about it more deeply, he focussed his mind on the core of his problem. It was all a matter of revenge for what his wife had done to him. He deeply desired to inflict punishment on her in return for the hurt. It was a case of retaliation... something he needed to expunge from his mind because she had gone abroad and was no longer within his reach. As soon as he put that idea to the back of his mind he would be free of all his thoughts about her. Now that he was aware of the true problem, he was able to work on it.
‘You’re very quiet,’ she said at length after a long silence prevailed.
‘I’m thinking,’ he told her.
‘Now we’re in trouble,’ she joked laughingly.
‘I’m not sure why I came on this holiday with you,’ he muttered somewhat resentfully although he had no reason to make such a remark.
‘That’s not a very nice thing to say,’ she chided. ‘You could have refused and that would have been the end of it.’
‘You keep saying you have something important to tell me but I’m still waiting to hear it.’
‘And you will.’
/> ‘I don’t think I’m interested in hearing it any more,’ he retorted in a serious tone.
She began to laugh which caused him some concern. In his opinion, the woman was going mad again. ‘You know we’re arguing just like an old married couple!’
He turned on her almost savagely. ‘Don’t even think about it!’ he growled.
She looked at him, pulling a face, ‘Don’t even think about it!’ she mocked in a low voice. She paused but there was no response from him. Then she flew into a rage as she began to lose her temper. ‘Who the hell do you think you are, Neil Waverley?’ He still did not respond so she waited a few moments before continuing. ‘Very well,’ she began in earnest. ‘I’ll tell you what’s on my mind but you have to hear me out before rejecting the idea out of hand. Will you do that?’
He hesitated for a while and then nodded. ‘Go on! I’m listening.’
She looked around to check that no one was within earshot before continuing. ‘I’ve thought of an exclusive means by which you can secure your future without risk or danger. Let’s be frank. The banking profession’s becoming more technologically advanced year by year which means that the banks will continue to lay off more staff as time goes on. You could find yourself looking for new employment elsewhere at some time in the future.
‘What on earth are you talking about,’ he cut in, much to her annoyance.
‘I told you to hear me out!’ she admonished gently. ‘Are you ready for this or not?’
He reacted badly at her question. ‘You know, I don’t really care any more. You’ve hung me on a piece of string for so long, I’ve lost interest.’
Her face puckered up at his response as she realised that she had drawn out her plan for far too long. ‘I’ve devised a method by which you can undertake a robbery at your bank and get away with it scot free. Even better because it’s without risk or any danger of being discovered.’
‘And why the Hell should I do something like that?’ he enquired sullenly, dismissing the idea from the start as being frivolous and ridiculous. ‘I have a secure job with a very large bank. I’ve got a good salary and a pension. If you’ve brought me all the way to Spain simply to spin a yarn like that, you’re out of your mind.’ He paused for a fraction before continuing. ‘Are there any members of your family in a sanatorium or who are currently seeing a psychiatrist?’
‘I’m not mad as you’ll find out when I tell you the full plan. You’ve got the perfect opportunity to carry it off. Each time you go down to the safe in your bank, you can take your briefcase. No one will notice. When you take the money from the safe to place it in the trolley, you put some of it in your briefcase. And you’ll keep doing it until you’ve got enough to retire.’
‘Enough to retire!’ he gasped, astounded that she should devise such a stupid plan and expect him to carry it through. ‘Brilliant, Paula! What happens when the safe runs out of money? Don’t you think someone will notice that small thing?’
‘You haven’t let me finish!’ she complained. ‘Each time you go down to the safe, you’ll have replacements in your briefcase.’
He stared at her with a puzzled expression on his face. ‘What sort of replacements? I’m sure they’d notice if I replaced the money with poker chips.’ A smile appeared on his face and he started to laugh.
She knocked his arm gently in anger. ‘Don’t be facetious! I’m being serious. Now listen! We cut newspapers into the same size as the money, put them into the bank’s plastic wrappers, and when you go down to the safe you put them at the bottom of the pile. At the end of each day, you’ll leave your branch with an executive briefcase filled with real money.’
‘Ah!’ he said in a knowing fashion. ‘Now it’s ‘we’... you and me together in this great conspiracy with me taking all the risk. Tell me, what happens eventually when there’s only a pile of newspaper cuttings and no money left in the safe? What am I supposed to bring up on the trolley?’
‘I’ve already through that one out,’ she told him bluntly. ‘But I’ll tell you all about it when you agree to go through with the plan.’
He shook his head slowly in disagreement. ‘That’s never going to happen. You realise that what you’re saying is preposterous. I’d never get away with it.’
‘I strongly disagree,’ she countered curtly. ‘You told me that the bank inspectors come every three months and that they’ve only just carried out an inspection. They’re unlikely to do so for at least two more months. That gives us plenty of time.’
‘I see. Now it’s ‘us’ again.’
‘The plan is foolproof I tell you,’ she went on decisively.
‘Yes... and I’m the fool. How can I entertain such a stupid idea if you can’t tell me the exit factor.?
‘Okay,’ she revealed uncertainly, ‘The final part of the plan has something to do with your acting ability.’
‘My acting ability!’ he gasped, completely perplexed. ‘What has that got to do with the bank?
She took umbrage at his comment and moved slightly away from him. ‘If you can’t take me seriously, I won’t continue. Just forget I said anything about it. Just forget it!’
She stood up and continued walking along the promenade angrily by herself. After a few moments he rose and followed her. The situation was worse than that between a husband and wife. Clearly there was a strong difference of opinion with regard to her plan but now she was very upset at his response and had walked off in a temper. He was equally angry. She may have been an extrovert but her plan was ridiculous and her attitude was offensive. However now that he had discovered the solution to his problem, about his guilt regarding his failure to satisfy his wife sexually, which he needed to work on, he really didn’t need the woman’s help any more... not that he believed he needed it in the first place. He considered that he may as well take the next plane home to England, albeit there would be no one to welcome him there. Nonetheless, reason prevailed in the long run. He was in Spain, The sun was shining and he could relax on the beach or beside the pool while everything was laid on for a very pleasant vacation. It was far wiser that he should stay until the end of the week. After that he would fly home and disassociate with the woman entirely. Of course it meant that he would have to give up going to rehearsals with The Carlton Theatre Group but that was no real hardship. He would have to change his life from a married situation to one of a single man in the future and create a new agenda by which he could continue his life. The bank would take all of his time during the day. It was the evenings and weekends that he would have to find interests to fill the gap,
He and Paula walked on for about a mile and then she turned and they made their way back. The problem is that the mind plays tricks on most human-beings when they are left to think alone. There was the story of the man driving down a remote country lane when one of his tyres burst. He had a spare tyre in the boot but no jack by which he could raise the car to replace it. He spied a lonely farmhouse in the distance and walked towards it. As he cross the fields, with time to spare, he began to assess the situation in advance in his own mind assessing what he would say to the man and what the reply would be. He would ask him for a jack. The man would ask him why he hadn’t one. He would tell him that someone must have taken it from his boot, The man would say that he should have checked his equipment before he left on a journey. And so it would go on. Subsequently, he would resent what the man said it to him. They would argue onwards and then become involved in fisticuffs... ,all over borrowing a jack. In due course he knocked on the door and the man came out. ‘You know what you can do with your jack!‘ shouted the traveller at the bewildered farmer and walked away angrily, And that happened solely in the mind of the car driver when he had time to think alone.
During the silence between him and Paula on the long walk, his mind ran over everything that had been said. Ultimately, he felt that he might have misjudged her in some wa
y, She was clearly trying to help him get over Elizabeth and he warmed to her for that aid. Maybe he had been somewhat offhand in his approach to her even though he resented any comments concerning a relationship. Naturally, her plan was a mission impossible and could hardly be considered but he felt that his remark relating to her family being in a sanatorium or seeing a psychiatrist was very much unwarranted. She was a very pleasant person and he realised that he could use her company to his advantage... providing she didn’t press him on the subject of stealing money from his bank.
Impulsively, he took her by the arm, stopping her in her tracks and turned her towards him. ‘I’m sorry,’ he apologised. ‘I’ve no excuse for my rudeness and bad behaviour. ‘I shouldn’t have spoken to you like that.‘
The serious expression on her face vanished within seconds to be replaced with a small smile. ‘It’s all right,’ she told him, ‘I understand how you feel. You’re under pressure. Don’t concern yourself about it.’
Her words made him feel much more comforted and he took her arm as they continued to walk back to their hotel which pleased her greatly. There was at least some hope for her on the horizon!
Later on, Waverley sat alone in his hotel bedroom before meeting Paula for dinner. He reflected the events of the day and felt somewhat satisfied that he had broken the deadlock to his psychological problem. His companion was absolutely right having got to the nub of the matter. He now realised that all the angst that burdened his mind was caused by the fact that he was unable to get his revenge on his deceitful wife.
At seven twenty that evening, he had dressed smartly and left his room to knock on Paula’s door.
‘Come in!’ she invited readily.
He opened the door and went inside to stare at her in astonishment. She was preparing to dress for dinner and was wearing only a brassiere and tiny panties. He coughed and looked away, prepared to leave the room but she called out to stop him.
