“I wondered if I might have a word with you outside for a moment.” She inquires. It seems rather odd to me but she has peaked my curiosity.
“Sure. It isn’t raining yet is it?”
“No, not yet anyways,” Tristan says placing his hand on my arm. “Cora, could I speak with you for just a moment?”
“Oh actually I just on my way out to speak with Jane.” I feel awkward being stuck between husband and wife but what a pair to be stuck between.
“Well I am sure Jane won’t mind. Will you darling?” Tristan asks his wife with a toothy smile.
“Of course not, but Cora I really do need to speak with you before the night is over.”
“Oh good heavens Jane! You make it sound so serious!” Tristan chuckles.
“No, not at all. I just had hoped to get to know our young American better.” She smiles back at him but her smile doesn’t reach her eyes.
“Well, I think I have a way for you to do just that. Cora, right this way.” Tristan places his hand on my bare back to steer me in the opposite direction. His hand is cold on my bare skin causing me to shiver. “I love a woman that shivers at just a touch.” He says as he winks at me.
“I am sure your wife does too.” I say reminding him that his wife is only about ten feet behind us.
“Actually she does but she isn’t very keen on blondes,” he smiles at the shock that must be on my face. I guess when Claire said they have “an unusual” marriage she wasn’t kidding.
“Ah, there you two are,” Tristan says to Eric and Harrison. They look like they were in a serious exchange.
“Cora, you are breathtaking,” Harrison says while scanning his eyes over me. The way he is looking me up and down makes me a little uncomfortable standing so close to Eric. “I was just telling Lord Ashford here that I am in need of someone to accompany me on a month long trip to Japan. I know you had expressed some interest in the subject of ways to bring clean water to people and conservation. I was rather hoping you would want to be the person to accompany me.”
“Oh!” I feel my face start to flush. I am a loss for words and that never happens.
“Of course you two would want to get to know each other better first,” Tristan chimes in. “It is a rather hard thing to do long distance and I seriously doubt that Harrison will want to be traveling back and forth from the city. I do have a solution though, Cora you could always come and stay in London with Jane and me.”
“Oh, thank you but I couldn’t impose like that,” I smile aware that my face is still bright red. I look over at Eric. He is just watching us with a blank expression. Why doesn’t he say something?
“Oh no, you wouldn’t be. Honestly, our house is so large we would hardly see each other. Don’t you think it is a good solution, Eric?”
“If Cora wants to go to get to know Harrison better then, yes it sounds like a perfect solution,” Eric replies with his eyes locked on mine. I am sure I misunderstood him. It almost sounds like he thinks I should go.
“Well there you have it,” Harrison announces looking pleased with himself. “What do you say Cora? Would like to spend some time together in London and then travel to Japan with me?”
“I don’t know. Eric, do you think I should?”
“Well, you did say when I first met you that you wanted to travel to Japan and Tristan is quite right. His house is large enough to host a full brigade. So I think if you want to go then you should go.” he says, his eyes cold.
I feel like I am falling for a moment as my stomach drops. He really just said that he thinks I should go with another man. What was all of the talk last night about me belonging to him? He even said he needed me. Well I guess what he needed was someone to play with his dick.
“Well I guess it is settled then as long as you are sure I won’t be a bother, Tristan.”
“No bother at all,” he smiles and winks at me again. I look back to Eric and he is just glaring at me with an icy stare. The usual warmth in his eyes is gone.
“Cora what do you say to dinner Thursday? That will give you a few days to get settled in,” Harrison asks in an upbeat tone.
“That would be great,” I smile at him even though it is forced. All I can focus on is that Eric just sent me away. “If you gentlemen will excuse me, I just remembered something I neglected to do earlier.”
I need another drink. I start towards the bar and then realize that Jane is right next to it. I can’t deal with her right now. I am just going to go inside the house. Apparently I have packing to do anyways. My eyes start to fill with tears and I don’t want to be in here anymore. I am headed to the door when I bump into someone. I turn to apologize and see that is Claire.
“Cora, honey, what is wrong?” That is all it takes to send me over the edge. I can’t hold the tears back any longer.
“Come on let’s get her outside,” says a familiar voice taking me by the arm.
“Oh, hi Miranda. I didn’t see you there,” I say through stifled sobs as they lead me out of the tent. It is freezing but still dry, thank goodness.
“Holy fuck it is cold!” Claire exclaims.
“I am sorry. You both can go back inside. I will just go to my room,” I whisper.
“No, we will be fine. Now what is the matter?” Miranda asks.
“Eric,” is all I can manage to get out before I am cry too hard to speak.
“Um, kinda figured it had to do with Eric,” Claire says gently rubbing my arm.
“He wants me to go stay in London,” I respond after taking a few breaths.
“Oh, that isn’t a bad thing. That is great! I am going to be just around the corner from Eric’s London home,” Claire beams.
“No, not to his house; to Tristan’s and not with Eric at all. He wants me to go there to get to know Harrison better.”
“Oh well I guess that explains the tears,” Miranda says gently rubbing my other arm. “I hate to be that friend but I did try to warn you about him. He has been alone for a long time. That isn’t an easy thing to change.”
“I know. I just thought that if I love him this much then he had to feel at least a little bit the same way. I mean even last night he told me that I was his and that he needed me. It just doesn’t make sense,” I say feeling a little childish.
“Okay, but Cora were either of those things said during sex or after he had been drinking?” Claire asks.
“Both,” I respond looking at my feet.
“I don’t think I need to tell you that you can’t rely on what a man says under those conditions,” Claire shakes her head at me like I am completely absurd.
“I know but you don’t understand. This was different. He was different. I really thought we were moving forward as a couple.” I know I sound delusional but they weren’t there. I don’t know how I can explain to them that during sex is when I feel Eric and I are the most honest with each other.
“Cora, I think,” Miranda starts but doesn’t get to finish. At that moment Lucinda burst out of the tent and stomps over to us.
“You,” she glares pointing at me. “You meddling little bitch! It wasn’t enough for you to get me thrown out of here but you have to steal my opportunity as well?”
“Lucinda, now really isn’t the time,” Miranda states stepping between Lucinda and me. It suddenly occurs to me that I don’t ever want to be on Miranda’s bad side.
“I don’t care and you don’t scare me,” Lucinda responds but backs away a little anyways.
“I don’t know what you are talking about,” I reply to Lucinda’s accusation.
“Harrison MacGuire. I should be the one going on that Japan trip and staying at the Cooper’s London house. You just had to play your little innocent and sweet act. So now he wants you to go instead because he thinks it would be good for you to get out and see the world. Do you know where this leaves me? Wales. The middle of nowhere in Wales with my sister and her family.”
“Lucinda I am sorry. I didn’t know, honest. I still don’t think you having t
o live with your sister is my fault at all.” I try to argue back but I just don’t have it in me to fight with her right now.
“Well if it isn’t your fault then whose fault is it?”
“I believe the rest of us agree it is your own fault. You made this bed and you get to lie in it, Lucinda. The sooner you stop blaming everyone else for your mistakes the sooner you will be happy. Now I don’t know about anyone else but I for one have had enough of your shit. Please just go away,” Miranda says sternly steeping in front of Lucinda and turning her back on her, effectively shutting her out of our conversation. Lucinda stands there fuming for a moment before storming off.
“What is wrong with Wales anyways?” I ask once I am sure Lucinda is far out of earshot.
“Nothing. It just isn’t London or another major world city so it isn’t right for her highness,” Miranda responds.
“I think she is just sad and she isn’t good at expressing her feelings,” Claire says in a sympathetic tone. She is sometimes sweeter than she is smart.
“I think you should go to London. Get to know Harrison and see if you like him. If you do, then go to Japan. Eric is who he is, Cora. At least this way you will have something to keep your mind off Eric and you may get an amazing trip out of it,” Miranda offers her voice softening again.
“You never know what could happen. Maybe you will end up liking Harrison more than you like Eric,” Claire adds.
I know in my heart that isn’t possible. I love Eric. I love him as surely as I am breathing air. A few months and a trip abroad isn’t going to change that. I do think that Miranda has a point about it helping take my mind off the fact that he clearly doesn’t return my feelings.
“Thank you both for being so kind to me. When I am in London we will have to get together,” I smile weakly. “I think I am going to be okay now.”
“Are you going up to your room?” Claire asks.
“Fuck no! It is still early and I am wearing a fabulous dress. I am not going to go sit alone and feel sorry for myself. Let’s go party.” I force myself to smile. I really do want to just go cry somewhere but that won’t fix anything. I have shed enough tears over Eric Ashford tonight. I know more will fall tomorrow but for now I am going to try find some good in the night.
Miranda loops her arm through mine as we walk back into the warmth of the tent behind Claire. A good looking man comes over and hands Claire a fresh drink. Without a word she winks at us and goes off with him.
“We need drinks,” Miranda suggests heading over to the bar. On the way my eyes meet Jane’s across the room. She doesn’t move towards me. She simply nods and then goes back to her conversation. I am really glad she seems to have changed her mind about speaking with me. I really don’t think I could handle her at this moment.
Miranda hands me a shot of tequila. “Here is to moving on!” She slams the shot and I follow her lead. The tequila is so smooth there is no need for any helpers. Before I have really recovered from the liquor she is pushing another shot in my hand.
“To new friends!” I toast this time. I drink the second shot as quickly as the first. Two more shots of tequila follow quickly. I am starting to feel a little light headed from the amount of alcohol I have had tonight. I look around for a place to sit for a moment and instead find Harrison.
“Care to dance?” He asks taking me by the arm not waiting for an answer.
The music is a waltz. For a second my mind drifts back to the waltz Eric and I shared in the library the other day. I feel my eyes start to well up slightly. No! I am not going to cry one more tear over him tonight. I shake my head a little clearing it as Harrison pulls me into the classic hold. We move gracefully around the dance floor.
“I am really glad you are coming to London. I think we will enjoy getting to know each other,” he says spinning me a little.
“I think we will too,” I smile up at him.
“Cora, you are pretty. I really enjoy a woman that looks like a woman. One that has curves,” his eyes seem to glaze over slightly.
“Well that is good,” I answer, biting my lower lip a little. I feel his hand twitch on my back. I am pretty sure he has more than just a dance on his mind. The song ends and I start to make my way off the dance floor. Harrison is right next to me.
“May I have this dance?” Tristan asks.
“I am flattered but you really aren’t my type,” Harrison responds with a chuckle.
“I will take that as a compliment. Cora?” Tristan holds out his hand. I hesitate for a moment but I then take his hand as he leads me back to the dance floor.
“I should warn you I have no idea how to dance to this music,” I admit honestly. The new song has a faster tempo than the waltz I just danced.
“It is alright. Just follow me. I am an expert at leading a woman’s body,” he smiles a sly smile at me. I never can tell how serious he is being and it makes me a little uncomfortable. I mean he is gorgeous and under different circumstances I would jump on him in a heartbeat. Right now; however, his wife is across the room speaking with Claire. The fact that he is Eric’s best friend makes it even more of an issue, even if Eric doesn’t feel the same way about me. I roll my eyes in an exaggerated motion.
“Will you just stop?” I ask. Clearly the alcohol is having an effect on my filter.
“Stop what?” He looks genuinely confused.
“Making innuendos at me. We both know you have no interest in sleeping with me so stop with the one liners making it sound like you do.”
“You are right I don’t want to sleep with you. I might fuck you but I think Eric would kill me. I mean that literally not figuratively.” I stumble and fall against him a little out of shock.
“What? You want to fuck me? What about your wife? Oh and I am pretty sure Eric could care less who I fuck.” I giggle a little that I just said “fuck” to Tristan Cooper. I am starting to feel a little dizzy.
“Yes, I want to fuck you. I think most men would Cora. You have wonderful curves and a sweet face. As for Jane, we have a different kind of marriage. We don’t really hold traditional views on sex or monogamy. And I think what you meant to say was that “Eric couldn’t care less” but I think you would have been wrong. I am sure you will agree with me before long too.”
“Wow that was a lot. Do you love your wife?”
“Well, that is a very odd question. Of course I love her. She is truly my soul mate.”
“But you both have sex with other people?”
“Sometimes. Not often really and we are always honest with each other about it. I am not saying it would work for everyone or even forever for us but it does now. We are both very happy together.”
“Hmm, I don’t think I could do that. Every time I see Eric even talk to another girl I want to scratch their eyes out.”
“So you care for him?”
“I love him but I don’t think it matters.” My voice sounds weird. I think my tongue isn’t working right. I wonder if I broke it.
“It is love, Cora. It always matters. You just may have to wait awhile to see that it does.” Tristan spins me and I stumble over something. I look at the ground and can’t see what it is I tripped over. I wonder if someone did that on purpose. Where is Lucinda?
“Tristan there are two things I need to tell you: One, you are a lot nicer than I thought you were. And B, I think I am drunk.”
“Well thank you, I think and let’s get you to your room.”
“Okay but don’t try to fuck me please.”
“I promise that I won’t,” he says wrapping his arm around my waist and leading me off the dance floor.
“Hey look it is Harrison! Hi Harrison!”
“Hello Cora. Are you okay?”
“I am fine!”
“She is just a little tired. She is just going up to bed now.”
“I can take her. I am sure you don’t want to miss the rest of the festivities.” Harrison offers.
“Oh no, I really do think that considering how tired Cor
a is I should take her.” Tristan says. I am just watching the two of them hoping someone helps me upstairs before tomorrow morning. I look between the two men and see Eric standing about twenty feet away watching us. I don’t want him to know how upset I am. I have gone passed hurt and I am now just angry.
A waiter walks by carrying a tray of drinks in a martini glass. I grab one and hold it up motioning to Eric and down it in one gulp. I pause as it threatens to come back up. Then force a smile as he scowls at me.
“Oh will one of you just please take me up!”
“There you are darling,” Jane says placing her hand on Tristan’s arm. “Are you heading up now? I was just thinking I am ready if you are. Cora would you care to walk up with us?”
“That would be great, thanks. Good night Harrison,” I say checking to see if Eric is still watching. Eric eyes meet mine again as I lean forward and kiss Harrison on his cheek. Jane loops her arm through the one of mine that is free from Tristan. We make our way out of the tent and head to the house arm in arm. We must look like a strange group off to see the wizard. I giggle and consider skipping but I think I will trip over my dress.
“Holy shit! It is really cold out here! Hey look snow!” I say out loud to myself really. There are just a few flakes falling. “I love the snow it makes everything so pretty and pure.”
We reach the warmth of the entry way. I kind of want to go back out and see the snow but I think Eric would be mad if I am outside without being dressed for it. Oh, wait I forgot. He doesn’t care about me anymore. He just passed me off to the first person to ask.
“Why doesn’t Eric care what happens to me?” I ask out loud although I am not sure I meant to. I see a look pass between Tristan and Jane. “I am sorry. I shouldn’t have said that. I am being whiny and it is irritating. And I know if I am irritating myself I am bugging the fuck out of you two.”
“You are fine,” Jane says with chuckle. “And don’t be so sure you have everything figured out Cora.”
We reach my room before I know it. How did I get upstairs? Tristan opens the door to my room although I don’t remember telling them which one is mine or what the code is to get in.
Room to Breathe Page 17
