He lifted a brow. “Why?”
“Because it won’t. Please stop the car, Bas.”
Upon hearing the panic in her voice, he stopped the car and the minute he did she threw open the door and raced toward her house. Not knowing what the hell was going on, he took off after her.
Before she could use her key to open the door, it was snatched open and an angry Reese came out and glared at Jocelyn. “Dammit why didn’t you tell me, Joce?”
She didn’t answer. Instead she tried to move past him to go into the house. “Where’s Leah?”
He blocked her path. “She’s asleep, but I want to know why you didn’t tell me.”
“Not now Reese, I have to—”
“No! I want to know why you didn’t tell me.”
Bas heard the anger in Reese’s voice, anger that was directed at Jocelyn. He also noted that Reese was blocking the way into her own house. Bas stepped forward. “Calm down, Reese. What’s going on? What has you so upset? Is something wrong with Leah?”
Reese’s glare left Jocelyn and moved to Bas. “Yeah, something is wrong with her all right, something I didn’t know about until today.”
He then moved his gaze back to Jocelyn. The eyes that looked at her were filled with a mixture of rage and anguish. “My God, Jocelyn, why didn’t you tell me that Neil Grunthall had raped her?”
Chapter 13
Jocelyn’s eyes widened. “Leah actually told you?”
Having his suspicions confirmed was like a kick in Reese’s gut, and it took everything he had not to ram his fist into the nearest post. “She didn’t tell me willingly,” he said with fury lining his every word. “I confronted her about why she left and when I told her about this house she started shaking uncontrollably. I reached out to calm her down, and when I did all hell broke loose. She went berserk as if she was reliving those moments with Neil and actually thought I was him.”
Reese paused long enough to rub a tortured hand down his face. The eyes that looked at Jocelyn again were hard and angrier than before. “Why didn’t you or your dad tell me?”
Jocelyn inhaled deeply, hearing the hurt, pain and despair in his voice. “Dad never knew and I only found out myself a few weeks ago, Reese,” she said softly. “And she made me promise not to tell you.”
Reese’s head fell back against the wooden post and he looked up at the sky as if the clouds held some kind of comfort for him. Then he looked back at Jocelyn. “Tell me what happened. Please. I need to know.”
Jocelyn slid her gaze from Reese to Bas. He was staring at her just as intently as Reese, although he hadn’t said anything. She knew Leah was still in love with Reese just as Reese was still in love with Leah. If anyone could break through the barriers Leah had erected, it would be Reese.
“All right,” she said wearily. “But I want you to promise you’ll be patient and understanding and—”
“My God, Joce, of course I’ll be patient and understanding. I love Leah,” he said in a tortured moan. “I’ve never stopped loving her even when I thought she had done me wrong. If you think I’ll turn my back on her now, knowing what she’s been through, then you don’t know me.”
Jocelyn inhaled deeply. She did know him and she knew how much he loved her sister. Somehow, through it all, his heart had remained intact even when his mind had assumed the worse.
Assumed.
She shook her head. Bas had helped her to see how that one little word could cause a world of trouble. “Okay, I’ll tell you what she told me.”
“On that note I think I’ll wait out in the car,” Bas said, turning to leave, thinking he’d heard more than he should have already. This was a private matter between Jocelyn, Reese and Leah.
“No, please stay, Bas,” Jocelyn said, not understanding why but knowing she needed him there.
Bas turned back around and met the silent plea in her gaze and knew at that moment he could deny her nothing.
He glanced over at Reese. “You’re okay with me staying?”
Reese nodded. “Yeah, man. I’m okay with it.”
Moments later, after telling the two men everything, Jocelyn shifted her gaze from Reese. It was hard not to see the tears that filled his eyes without getting misty-eyed, as well.
And then there was Bas. She had seen him ball his fist in anger several times, and although he hadn’t said anything, the tightening of his jaw and the fury that lined his eyes had said it all.
“Did she get any professional help?” Reese asked, breaking the silence.
“Yes, but there are still issues she’s trying to work through, hurdles she’s yet to cross. It takes time recovering from an ordeal such as that.”
“No matter how long it takes, I’m going to be there with her,” Reese said in a firm voice. “We’re going to work through this thing, Leah and I. Together.”
Jocelyn smiled. “She’s not going to make things easy for you, Reese. Already she’s talking about returning to California in a few weeks.”
Reese nodded, and although he didn’t say anything, Jocelyn knew he had no intentions of letting Leah go anywhere. “She’s sleeping now, but I want to be there when she wakes up, to talk to her, Jocelyn. Alone.”
Jocelyn knew what he was asking of her. The mothering instinct in her demanded that she see to her sister herself, but she knew Reese was right. He was the one who needed to be there for Leah. “Okay.” She then glanced over at Bas. “Do you want to go grab some lunch?”
Bas smiled. She had a feeling he agreed wholeheartedly with her decision to let Reese handle Leah in his own way. “Yes, lunch sounds good and I know just where I want to take you.”
Leah came awake, remembering where she was. Then she recalled her argument with Reese and…“Oh my God!” She covered her face with her hands when it all came tumbling back to her. He knew. There was no way he would not have figured things out.
“Are you okay?”
She jumped then turned in the bed to face Reese, her eyes going wide. He was standing in the doorway. “What are you doing here?”
“I told you I wasn’t going anywhere, Leah. Besides, I think we should talk.”
No! She didn’t want to talk. She wanted to be as far away from him as she could. Knowing that he knew what had happened to her was too much. She quickly slipped off the bed. “I just want to finish my laundry and leave. Jocelyn should be back any minute and—”
“Jocelyn is already back. She and Bas went somewhere for lunch. They knew I wanted to talk to you alone.”
“We have nothing to talk about.”
He ignored her and took a step into the room, and she automatically backed up. Her seemingly frightened retreat almost broke Reese’s heart. “Why didn’t you tell me what Neil had done to you? Why did you run away instead? Didn’t you think I had a right to know?”
“Why? So you could kill him with your bare hands and go to jail? He wasn’t worth it, Reese. He was nothing but a troublemaker and I knew I couldn’t tell you or my father. Besides,” she said, lowering her voice, fighting back her tears, “he wasn’t your problem.”
He took another step into the room. “You were mine, Leah. I loved you. I was going to marry you. Your problems were my problems. We would have worked things out.”
“No, I had to leave. I felt dirty. Used. I felt unworthy. Don’t you understand how difficult it is for me now, knowing that you know?”
“You should have told me. It would have changed nothing.”
Leah turned away from him, trying to block whatever emotional reactions she was having to his words. Why couldn’t he understand that she couldn’t tell him? At the time she had felt battered, bruised and confused.
“Leah, please don’t shut me out. I love you. I always have. I still do.”
She turned back around, her eyes filled to capacity with tears. His admission of love was the last thing she wanted to hear, the last thing she wanted to know. Knowing he loved her and that he’d built this house for her was too much. “No, we can’t go there
, Reese. We can’t go back. Too much has happened. After I left and went to California, I had a hard time dealing with things. If a man looked at me, I panicked. Finally, I knew I needed help and sought out professional assistance. With the aid of counselors and a very special support group, I began to see that I wasn’t alone. There were other women who’d been violated like I had. And then there was Grace, the older woman who was kind enough to give me a place to stay in her home. She became the mother I had lost, the grandmother I’d never had and the friend that I needed. I’ve come a long way but I still have a long way to go.”
“And we’ll go there together. I love you too much to let you leave me a second time.”
The sincerity in his words touched her and nervously she placed her lower lip between her teeth and met his gaze. He was being honest with her, leaving her no choice but to be completely honest with him, as well. “And I love you, too, Reese. Too much for you to get involved and waste your time with me. The love I knew you had for me is what helped me keep my sanity over the years. But each time I came home I knew that love was turning to hate and I had to learn how to get stronger without your love as a crutch because it wasn’t there anymore and I couldn’t pretend that it was.”
She wiped the tears from her eyes before continuing. “I still haven’t gotten over things to the point where I trust men. In fact, the thought of one ever touching me makes me ill. Even you. Knowing that, how can I even consider us picking up where we left off?”
“Like I said, we’ll work through—”
“No, there’s nothing to work through. In a few weeks I’m returning to California. I’m going to use the money I’m getting from Jocelyn to open a small restaurant there. My life, the one I do have, is in California. There’s nothing for me here.”
“I’m here, Leah,” he said quietly. “The man who loves you.”
She shook her head. “No, I can’t take what you’re offering. I can’t and I won’t.”
Not giving him a chance to say anything else, she walked around him and out of the room.
Jocelyn replaced her cell phone in her purse and glanced over at Bas when he brought the car to a stop at the traffic light. “That was Reese. Things didn’t go with Leah the way he’d hoped, but he’s determined to help her through this.”
Bas nodded. “He loves her very much.”
“Always has. At one time I actually envied what they shared, it was so special. And I’ve always known that if there was one person who could get Leah to change her mind about leaving Newton Grove it was going to be Reese, just like I truly believe he’s the one person who can heal her hurt.”
“I’m going to have to agree with you on that.”
Jocelyn had been waiting to hear from Reese, and with the phone call from him out of the way, she took the time to study her surroundings out the car’s window. Lifting a brow, she glanced back over at Bas. “I thought we were headed back to town for lunch. Where are we going?”
He smiled although he couldn’t take his eyes off the road to look over at her. “My place. I’m treating you to lunch.”
Jocelyn blinked. “Your place? I thought you were staying at Sadie’s Bed and Breakfast.”
“I was, until Friday. While I was out riding around with Reese a few weeks ago, I saw this cabin on the outskirts of town and thought it would be a nice piece of investment property for the Steele Corporation. All of us like to get away every once in a while and we all love the mountains. Our parents own a cabin that we use occasionally, but this one is bigger.”
“So you bought it? Just like that?”
He risked glancing over at her before returning his eyes to the road. Just for that instant he felt his heart slam hard in his chest. He did love her. He was no longer falling in love with her; he had fallen—and hard.
“Yes, just like that,” he said, feeling like a man on top of the world. He would feel even better if the woman who held his affections felt the same way, but he knew that she didn’t. But he had time to spare, and pretty soon she would see that Reese wasn’t the only man on a mission to win over the woman he loved.
“So what’s for lunch?” she asked.
“I thought I’d keep it simple and fix a couple of sandwiches. I haven’t had a chance to do any real grocery shopping yet, but I do have stuff to make a nice sandwich.”
“What kind of sandwich?”
When he brought the car to a stop in front of his cabin, he cocked his head and shot her a smile that tilted the corners of his lips. “I hope you like peanut butter and jelly.”
Jocelyn had to admit that the peanut butter and jelly sandwich and glass of iced tea were good. She hadn’t eaten since breakfast so her hunger might have been what had made it so delicious. But then she thought of something else that was delicious, something she liked—Bas’s kisses.
“What are you thinking about?”
“Oh.” A blush stained her cheeks. She’d thought he was using the restroom. She hadn’t known he’d returned and had been staring at her. “I—” She paused, wondering what she could say. “I was just thinking about Reese and Leah,” she lied, figuring he would believe that.
“And the thought of them is what had you smiling?”
“Er…yeah,” she said, compounding her lie. “I can remember happier times.”
“Don’t give up on them. The happier times will return.”
“You think so?”
“Yes,” he said without hesitation. “When two people love each other, things will work out for them.”
She lifted a brow. “You sound like someone who knows.”
He shook his head. “Trust me, I’m not, but I believe it, and I’ve seen it happen. Take my brother Chance and his wife, Kylie. They butted heads from the start, but finally they decided to give love a try and eventually got married. And I don’t know two happier people.”
Jocelyn nodded, glanced around. For a place that had been moved in to a mere three days ago, Bas’s place looked lived in. The three-bedroom, two-bath two-story log cabin with cathedral ceilings, sat secluded on a stream with hardwood trees all around. It also had an extraordinary view of the mountains, a wood-burning fireplace and a covered porch with an outdoor hot tub.
“You still planning on going to that baby shower later?”
She turned, not knowing he had crossed the room and was standing so close. “No, I’m not in the mood,” she said softly, barely realizing what she was saying. Being this close to Bas was as usual stirring her senses, all five of them.
There was the scent of him, strong and manly with a come-hither aroma that should be bottled. The sight of him, especially in his jeans, was provocative enough to make a woman’s mouth water…And speaking of mouth, the taste of him from last night was still on her tongue. Even the peanut butter hadn’t been able to eradicate it. Her taste buds were sensitive, tingling, anticipating kissing him again. Just thinking about it was putting another sense to work—her hearing. She could hear the pounding of her heart against her chest.
And then there was the sense of touch, something she hadn’t quite explored to the fullest when it came to him. A soft sigh escaped her lungs at the thought of touching him intimately, taking him in her hands, feeling him harden beneath her fingers.
“You’re smiling again,” he said, resting his hip against his kitchen counter. “Still thinking about Reese and Leah?”
Jocelyn chewed the inside of her cheek, wondering what his reaction would be if she told him what she’d really been thinking about. She swallowed, deciding not to chance it. So she told him something that wasn’t a lie, but it wasn’t the full truth, either. “I was thinking about this weekend.”
Bas smiled. “Now isn’t that a coincidence. So was I.”
“And what was your favorite part?” she asked him, wondering if it was the same as hers.
He deliberately licked his lips and eased up closer to her. “I can’t believe you have to ask me that, sweetheart,” he said in a low voice.
Heat suddenl
y seemed to bubble up in Jocelyn’s throat. The sight of his tongue was sending unflagging warmth all through her. “You enjoyed that, huh?”
“Most definitely,” he whispered, leaning in closer to her.
Jocelyn breathed in, remembering the nights she hadn’t been able to sleep because of thoughts of him, and she knew there was something she wanted to know.
Something she had to know.
Last night she had had an orgasm standing up. She wondered how one felt lying down in a bed. A slow burn began building between her legs at the thought of finding out. And she knew she couldn’t leave this cabin until she did.
A part of her knew that she and Bas would never be a real couple. His home was in North Carolina and hers was here. There was nothing to keep him in Newton Grove when it was time for him to leave. But there was something the two of them could share while he was here. It was something she had never shared with a man before. A hot and torrid love affair. It would all be in the name of fun. In the end there would be no hard feelings and no regrets.
She could do this. She wanted to do this. She needed to do this.
Bas had awakened feelings and urges within her that she’d never had to deal with before. Not only had he awakened them, he had stirred them up real good and hot. She knew if she wanted to take things to the next level it would be up to her to make the move. He probably assumed that if he made them, she would accuse him of moving too fast. Hadn’t he told her about the problem with assuming things?
Making the decision to take matters into her own hands, she smiled and pointed past him. “Have you used your fireplace yet?”
He glanced over his shoulder and then back at her. “No, why, are you cold?”
“No, I’m not cold.” She sighed deeply. For God’s sake, she told herself, don’t lose your nerve now. Remember that article you read in Today’s Black Woman? Sometimes it’s up to you to let a man know what you want, Jocelyn Isabella Mason. She smiled, thinking that although she wasn’t named after her father, together her initials spelled JIM.
Forged of Steele Bundle Page 38
