by C. S. Starr
“If we go to San Fran, we may never get LA back.” Tal glanced at Juan’s cousins. “And what about Mexico?”
“Send them to Montana. The kids,” Lucy said. “I have friends there that will take them in until it’s safe.”
“Who are you?” Rika clipped, taking in Lucy’s disheveled appearance.
“Rika, this is Lucy Campbell,” Tal said, reaching for her hand. “Lucy, Rika.”
The two women regarded each other with detached interest.
“We’ll decide in the morning,” Rika replied. “Otis, will you—”
“I need to fuel up, but yeah. Sure,” he muttered, pulling off his glasses and rubbing his forehead. “I’d love to fly everyone to San Fran. I don’t have anything else to do.”
“We can find someone else—”
“I mean it. I don’t have anything else to do,” he replied. “But I need to sleep.”
“Everyone go to bed,” Rika ordered. “Tal, Lucy, you’re in the den. There’s a murphy bed. Otis, you take the couch in the games room.”
What seemed like a lifetime after the last time they’d been alone, Lucy and Tal worked together to set up the Murphy bed and locked themselves in, bracing a chair against the door.
“She just assumed we were sleeping together,” Tal said thoughtfully.
“You had your hand on my lower back,” Lucy replied, somewhat tersely. “I’ll kill him, if he did…to Cole.”
“You’ll have to get in line. Rika’s got first dibs, and he did kill her children’s father.”
“Maybe we can flip a coin,” she said bitterly, stripping down to her tank top and underwear before quickly crawling into bed.
Tal realized that Lucy undressing should have been considered anything but sexy after the night they’d had, but perhaps because of the great deal of uncertainty surrounding the next day and every one after it, the part of his brain that gave a fuck about etiquette shut down and he tilted her chin up towards his. “I want to look at you,” he murmured.
“Tal, it’s not the time,” she whispered unconvincingly as she rolled onto her side. “It’s…it’s been a long day.”
The mood in the room darkened with the change in her expression. “What’s wrong?”
“She knows there’s something between us. Your friend. It’s…not what I wanted.” She pulled away. “Now, to her, we’re a thing, and that…it’s not good for either of us right now. This, it was a nice idea, maybe…it’s better if I stick with what I know.”
Tal took a minute to carefully draft his response. “You’re taking the easy way out if you think that.”
“Maybe I am,” Lucy said, her tone wounded. “Or maybe I’m protecting myself the best way I know how.”
She was shutting down. Tal saw it clear as day. He knew she was right; that the position she’d created for herself was easier than the one they were exploring. Being together was a liability for both of them in a lot of ways.
It didn’t mean he wanted it any less.
“Rika can go, but I’m staying,” Tal decided. “And you’re staying too, and we’re going to find out what happened to your brother. The rest?” he shrugged. “Like I said, it doesn’t have to be like that.”
She nodded, her brow tight with worry or frustration—Tal couldn’t decide. “And Bull and Zoey are coming.”
“Then it’s settled. We’ll stay. We’ll go to my house tomorrow.” He reached over and flicked the lamp off. “Good night.”
Tal’s heart almost stopped when he felt Lucy’s lips press against his.
“I’m sorry,” she whispered with regret. “I don’t want it to be like this.”
He relished in her lips pushing against his for a minute before pulling her on top on him. He half expected her to smack him for it. “Then it’s just between us,” he told her, relaxing as she made no attempt to pull away from him. “We be what we need to be out there, and when we have the good fortune of ending up somewhere like this?”
“Mmm,” she replied. Her mouth pressed against his again, and he touched her tentatively, finally tugging at her shirt as she assisted him by hauling it over her head. “Maybe that’s it.”
Chapter 22
January 2003
Los Angeles, West
“It’s your birthday,” Tal said thoughtfully, wishing he’d planned something that would somehow mark the occasion as magnificently as her parents had done for Leah’s older sister a few years before. “We should be doing more than this.”
“Yours is next month,” she replied with a shrug. “I guess we’re adults now.”
“I guess so,” he said, as he continued chopping tomatoes for the omelets they’d started making for dinner. “What does that even mean?”
“I wish someone was here to tell us,” she said with a wry smile. “Wouldn’t that be nice.”
He ducked out of the kitchen and returned a minute later with a bottle of Kosher wine from his dad’s cellar. “Mazel Tov,” he said, reaching for the corkscrew.
It took the two of them twenty minutes to get the cork out, finally resorting to shoving it into the bottle.
“We’re terrible grownups,” Leah giggled, as he poured them both a large glass.
“It’s been a hell of a year, Schmidt,” Tal said, raising his glass. “To those that didn’t live to see it.”
“And to much better ones ahead,” she added, taking a sip. “And to gun control.”
They both looked at each other solemnly. They didn’t really talk about Rachel anymore. Tal leaned over and kissed her forehead.
“Do you want to go watch something we weren’t allowed to watch before, since we’re adults now?”
“We do that all the time,” she replied, blinking back a tear. “But sure.”
American Psycho was selected from the huge collection of the most current movies Tal had amassed over the last year, and since their glasses were large and the wine was good, by the time the infamous sex scene played, inhibitions were dangerously low.
It started with a kiss, deeper than any either of them had experienced, and when Leah straddled his lap, morality took a back seat to sensation as she pushed against him.
“I love you,” she whispered. “I love you so much.”
She was everything to him. The reason he wanted to go on most days. All he had left.
“I love you too,” he murmured back, groaning as she palmed him through his sweatpants. The sensation was unexpected, and it felt good. Really good. Tal had no idea what he was doing as he picked his cousin up, and their lips still pressed together and he carried her to his room. They fumbled a bit, ignoring every opportunity to make an excuse to stop.
“Happy Birthday,” he murmured, dropping her onto his bed.
“Thanks,” she whispered back, pulling him on top of her.
November 2012
Los Angeles, West
“I’ll stay,” Rika said, her voice low. “But we take him down quick, and we deal with the consequences. I can’t live in limbo like this. I feel like he’s playing cat and mouse.”
Tal nodded. “I agree. I think he’s onto us though. Or he thinks he’s onto us.”
“Of course he is,” she replied tersely, sipping her tea in the early morning light. “But it’s hard to say how much. Or he thinks you’re balls deep in me, like some asshole. We need to know what he knows.”
“I think he knew we were in Campbell.”
Lucy sat down beside them at Rika’s breakfast bar. “No, he didn’t. East did. I called Cara, and Craig was working for East. They knew you were there, not Connor. They thought you were working out some sort of alliance.”
“How do you know?” Rika asked curtly.
Lucy raised her eyebrows. “We know. Cara’s…” She looked up thoughtfully. “Convincing when she wants to be.”
Tal breathed a deep sigh of relief, knowing things weren’t even more complicated.
Rika raised her hand. “Okay, so, so far, we know that your brother is tearing East a new asshole in th
eir territory, Vegas—through East—is tearing us one in Arizona, and the rest is hearsay and guesses.”
“Right,” Lucy nodded. “But through educated guesswork, we think that Connor was responsible for our kidnapping, and my assault, and he possibly killed my brother.”
Rika looked at her thoughtfully. “You think he did that?”
Nodding, Lucy took the cup of coffee Rika offered her. “I think he’s trying to direct our attentions towards East, and he’s succeeded, to his benefit. They won’t be able to supply Vegas the way they would if they weren’t fighting on two fronts.”
“Who leads in East?” Tal asked, hoping someone knew more about East than he did. Connor had always been the diplomat out of the two of them, and Tal had paid little attention. East with their crazy job skill aptitude tests had always been too weird for him to pay too much attention to.
Lucy pulled her map out of her back pocket and pointed to some lines she’d drawn. “It’s a group. A council. Two from the north, two from the south, and one from the middle to break tie votes. The group changes often, but the rules regarding everything else have been the same for almost a decade. If you kill a group member, you take their place.”
“But you have to be from the north to kill someone from the north?” Rika shook her head. “That’s very complicated.”
“I agree,” she said. “But that’s how we heard they do it. We think Sugar-in-the-Gas-Tank Craig worked for someone named Ruddy from the north.” Lucy pointed at old Maine. “From there.”
“Who’s on their council.”
“Presumably.” She looked around at the sleeping Mexicans on the living room floor. “Tal, we’re going to your house. I want to hear what your cousin’s told Connor—”
“I saw her yesterday. She’s told him that Tal’s been here with me.” Rika said. “Which might explain the broken windows, now that I think of it.”
Tal nodded. “Two birds with one stone.”
“She’s been providing him with money. A lot of money.” Rika stood and pulled out a list of expenditures. “She’s been keeping track and forging your signature, but I think she’s doing it so he won’t question where Tal is, not because she wants to help him.”
“So you don’t think she’s on Connor’s side?” Lucy asked, focusing on Rika.
“I think when push comes to shove, she’ll back Tal. She’s family.” Rika reached for her cigarettes. “But I don’t know how much damage she’s done. She’s all over the place. She’s had a rough couple of months.”
“We’ll go see her,” Tal said, glancing at Lucy. “See if we can figure her out.”
“She might know more than we’re giving her credit for,” Lucy replied. “She did have a whole week where she thought you were gone, and as Riki—”
“Rika,” she corrected.
“As Rika has just told us, she scares easily and feels the need to tie her fortunes to someone else.” Lucy took the muffin she was offered. “I think she’s the key.”
Tal found Lucy’s put-on coldness amusing after the night they’d shared. He knew she’d never make it in Hollywood. She was a terrible actress.
“And I think she’s nothing,” Rika replied, hugging her coffee mug. “I think we need to focus on bigger things.”
***
Later that morning, two of them walked the mile to Tal’s house, bags on their backs, like they were on some sort of excursion. Not many words were exchanged between them besides the direction to walk, from Tal, which got a nod in return.
“My place is about five minutes from here,” he said quietly. “On the left.”
“Okay,” she nodded, giving him a half smile.
He brushed her hand and nodded at a hedge, which blocked a giant burnt-out shell of a mansion. “Come here for a minute.”
Lucy followed him, and they sat out of sight of the road, under an avocado tree, heavy with fruit. It was hot, but the tree provided adequate shade for what Tal had in mind.
“I’ve never had an avocado,” Lucy whispered.
Tal reached up and picked her a large one. “It’s not ripe yet. It’ll need a few days.” He reached into his book bag. “I brought something to show you at the house, and since I’m not sure I’ll get another chance, I thought I’d do it now.”
Lucy looked thoughtfully at the large red book he pulled out of his bag.
“This is my family,” he said, putting the album in front of them. “My mom, she did these albums. One a year. It’s important to remember, I think.”
The first shot was of him and his oldest brother. They were sitting by the pool, feet dangling. Lucy slid in closer and smiled. She’d been in relationships, and this, whatever this was in its early days, it was different. It wasn’t about sex, and it wasn’t about what she could do for him. It just was. They just were.
She found herself coveting every minute they had.
“Look how young you were.” She smiled. “Just a little guy.”
Tal nodded and pointed at his brother. “This is Adam. He would have probably been a doctor, like my grandpa. He always liked science.”
“He looks like you,” Lucy said with a grin.
“We looked the most alike. My other brother Rob, he had this weird red hair that was a strange recessive trait on my mother’s side.” Tal turned the page and pointed to him. “People didn’t always think we were brothers. That’s my dad.”
Lucy smiled brightly. “He’s you, with less hair. And that’s your mom.” She recognized her immediately. Tal had her eyes, especially when he smiled. “She’s beautiful.”
“You would have liked her, I think,” Tal said. “And I think she would have liked you.”
“Why?”
“Because there’s something in you that would have reminded her of herself when she was our age. I’m sure of it.”
“Was she sexually confused with way too much responsibility?” Lucy smiled.
Tal shook his head and laughed. “No, but she was very independent, and she cared deeply about others. She would have recognized your strength, because not everyone that’s been through what you have ends up like you are.”
“This was your line when you came to see me?” she chuckled, taking in picture after picture. They looked like a family from a television show.
“I didn’t have a line,” Tal admitted. “I needed to know you’d be okay though.”
Lucy’s eyes darted around before tugging Tal to the ground so they were nose to nose. “You’re smarter than Connor, you know,” she whispered, brushing her lips against his, happy to ignore the urgency of their current situation and pretend life was different for a few moments longer.
“I hope so.”
“I’m sorry…I didn’t last night.” Her brow furrowed tightly when she thought about him vanishing to the bathroom wordlessly when she froze up ten minutes after she took her shirt off. “I just…It’s not you—”
“I know,” he nodded. She wrestled with her reaction then versus the way she felt in that moment, comfortable and affectionately propped up on his chest. “It’s fine, I know, and it’s okay.”
“We’ll find time. We’ll make time.” She kissed his neck. “And it’ll be a bit of good, just for us.”
Lucy unrumpled herself about an hour later, checking her reflection in the rearview of a rusted out Jaguar in the driveway of the burnt down house. Her mouth looked puffy; well-loved. Things were less stressful in the light, she decided. Less room for her imagination to step in.
Tal chuckled at her changing her expression in the small mirror. “What a bitch-face. Let’s go feel my cousin out.”
“There are so many jokes I could make,” Lucy chuckled, holding his hand until they reached the road. “But I won’t.”
“Hey, I haven’t so much as touched her since I got back. I stuck to my guns, Zoey-fucker.”
She pushed him. The look before she cracked up laughing left him looking terrified. “Subtle. You think you’re funny, Bauman?”
Lucy glared as he
playfully grabbed her ass. “I think you’re funny, Campbell.”
Tal’s house was huge, Lucy thought to herself. Massive, but run-down and in serious need of a paint-job. She hung back as he fumbled with his keys and let himself in. She stepped in after him and looked around at the massive entryway and the elaborate staircase. Even after ten years of half-ass repairs, it was easily the nicest house she’d ever been in.
“You’re back. You’re back,” the cousin, beautiful of course, with a mane of shiny dark hair and a perfect petite figure, squealed, wrapping her arms around Tal affectionately. It hit Lucy in the gut. “Shit, I almost didn’t think you were coming back.”
Tal reached for her shoulders and looked at her very seriously. “I need you to tell me everything.”
“Who’s she?” Leah asked, noticing Lucy as she set her bag down and locked the front door.
“That’s Lucy Campbell.”
“Oh,” Leah said, defeated. “Lucy Campbell. Hi.”
Lucy gave her a half smile, which was more like a weak frown. “Hi.”
“Hi,” she replied, glancing at Tal, whose poker face Lucy found impressive. “I ran everything by Rika. All the money. He’s needed a lot of it, and he’s been pretty pissed that you’re not around.”
“It was only two nights.”
“I convinced him you were with Rika when he called. I don’t know if he bought it.” She nervously twisted her hair and shook her head. “I don’t think he bought it.”
“So what does he think then?”
She shrugged. “I don’t know.”
“I’m going to call him.” Tal decided. “Just…” He raised his eyebrows at Lucy. “Just wait here.”
Being left with Tal’s cousin was incredibly awkward. Leah didn’t make it any better by sizing her up and down, then turning her nose up at her as she took a seat in an armchair.
“I wasn’t expecting you to come back with him.”
“I don’t trust you,” Lucy said bluntly, sitting on a worn couch. “And anyone that would fuck their own family over, after everything that’s happened, is the lowest of the low.”
