by Ivey , Tasha
"I do, too."
Will turns onto his side, suddenly seeming amused. "He likes you, you know. I mean really likes you."
Even with his delight in telling me the worst kept secret in the world—a secret that I deeply adore—I can't help but to be somber. "I know."
"You can't tell me that the feeling isn't mutual!"
"I like him a lot, Will, but what good does it do me? It just can't happen."
Will snickers and attempts to cheer me up. "Oh, I see. If you weren't all hot and bothered over my best friend, then, would you have kissed me?"
I lean over and kiss him on the cheek. "Maybe someday, Romeo. But, for now, I'm exhausted and ready to go home. Brooks and I spent most of the morning swimming and looking for seashells, and the heat has really zapped me."
He jumps up and tugs on my hands until I'm back on my feet. "How about I drive you home, and we get to know each other a little better. Maybe we can work on that kiss!"
I stop dead in my tracks and glare at him, furrowing my brow.
"Kidding! Geez, Brooks warned me that you'd chew me up and spit me out, and I'm starting to think he wasn't joking."
"Oh, no, he's not joking. I can hold my own when I need to. Did he tell you why he came home wearing only boxers yesterday?"
"He said he dove off the cliff and lost his clothes, but that's it. Why?"
I loop my arm through his. "Just in case you ever need some ammunition against him, let me tell you the whole story . . ."
Brooks and Ashton both jump up when they see us coming, and I'm sure their minds are racing, trying to figure out what we've been doing. Ashton immediately drags me inside to help clean up from dinner; I can only imagine that Brooks is going to try to press Will for the details of our private stroll. There's honestly no telling what Will is going to tell him, either.
I can easily tell that Ashton and Brooks are related. Not surprisingly, they have the same color hair, but their eyes are oddly identical—both a vibrant blue color with abnormally long lashes. She also has his easygoing personality and quick wit. I find it hard to imagine how the two of them grew up to be such genuine, good-hearted adults, considering how pompous and insanely greedy their parents are.
Brooks seems to appear out of nowhere. "Okay, Laura, it looks like I'll be your driver this evening. Are you ready to go? Will said you mentioned it."
"Uh, sure. What happened to him?"
"He's waiting on Ashton," he says, directing his gaze at her. "Let's just say they desperately need to talk before they drive me insane."
Ashton throws a dishtowel at him. "Joshua Brooks! What did you tell him?"
He shrugs. "Just go talk to him. He's waiting." She only points her finger at him accusingly and huffs as she retreats out of the kitchen, her hair whipping around as she spins to shut the back door behind her. Brooks cackles.
"What's all that about?" I ask, desperately wanting to be in on the joke.
"Jealous?"
"Don't be silly, Brooks. I told you that I would act happy about being here with Will, didn't I? That is what you wanted. I think you are the jealous one, if anyone is." I wink at him.
"Insanely jealous," he confesses, winking back. "Oh, I almost forgot to give you this." He extends his hand to me after pulling it out of his pocket.
"A conch shell!"
He leans in closer. "A special shell for someone special."
I just grin.
"Corny, I know," he snorts. "Let's get you home, milady, before I get myself into trouble."
Brooks drops me off, promising that he would see me soon, and I run in to kiss Nana goodnight before running up to my room. As soon as I walk through the door and put the shell on my dresser, my cell phone starts beeping at me, signaling the impending demise of my battery's fading charge. But, before I plug it in, I notice that I have five missed calls, all from Fawn. It's been a few days since we've spoken, but she never calls repeatedly like that. Hoping my battery will hold out a few more minutes, I dial her number.
"Laura!" she blurts out. "Where have you been? I've been calling and calling!"
"I'm fine, and how are you?" I ask sarcastically.
She huffs. "Fine."
"Good. Now, what's the matter?"
She groans. "I've been bad. Really bad."
"Tell me you didn't go back to Kevin."
"No, Laura. Worse than that. Alex called me a couple days ago."
What is the deal? This is the second time I've heard that name tonight. "Why did he call you? What, are you two dating now?"
"No . . ."
"Fawn . . ."
"Okay, okay. He was asking about you and whining how bad he felt about how he treated you. He wanted to talk to you but didn't know if you would allow it. I told him that you definitely wouldn't."
I don't see any cause for alarm. "Good. So, what's the problem then?"
"The problem is . . . I gave him your Nana's address. He wanted to talk to you in person."
"You what?"
"I know I shouldn't have, sweetie, but I had a momentary lapse of judgment. After I thought about it for a while, I tried to call him at his office, but his secretary told me he was taking a few days of vacation."
"Oh, Fawn," I whine. "I don't even know what to say to you right now."
"Maybe you can say that you forgive me?"
"Yes, I guess I do. But I'll hold you responsible if he shows up here. You owe me, big time."
"I'm so sorry," she pleads. "I'm a terrible friend."
"You certainly are, but I love you anyway."
"Back at ya. Oh, but not the terrible friend part. Call me soon, okay?"
"Okay, G'night, Fawn."
I keep telling myself that since Alex hasn't shown his face yet, he probably won't show up here. That would not be in his best interest. I'm glad that Fawn decided to warn me, but she sure can be ditzy and gullible at times. And she never thinks anything through before she acts on it.
I'm too tired to care about Alex's possible arrival. All I want to do is curl up in my bed and find out where my mother's journal will take me tomorrow. I'm beginning to feel pretty silly about this whole quest that I'm on. I mean, is it actually possible that my mother visited me in my dreams to send me on a wild goose chase? In retrospect, none of it seems at all plausible, but then again, I have met a few interesting people, and I've had a few exciting days here.
After an hour of reading, I'm feeling disheartened at the fact that my mom doesn't list any locations that she visited, with or without Joe. She only talks about him. His likes and dislikes, dreams for his future, funny jokes that he told her, facts about his family, etcetera, etcetera. I almost feel like I know him as well as I know myself at this point, so it's clear to see that she was in love with him. That's something that I'm beginning to see in my mother's journal—the mechanics of real love. Finally, though, I turn to yet another entry, and my mission is back in business.
July 20, 1978
Joe and I had big plans today, and I'm exhausted. He's had this special "date" planned for a week, and I've been looking forward to it. Let me go ahead and say that I wasn't at all disappointed.
First, he picked me up in his dad's car, a brand new Cadillac with red velour seats. As soon as I got in the car, he pulled a bouquet of gorgeous flowers out of the backseat and kissed me on the cheek. I got a little embarrassed when I realized my dad was watching from the living room window. Surprisingly, though, he just smiled and closed the curtain.
Before I knew it, I found myself at the marina, praying that he wasn't going to take me fishing or something icky like that. Boy, was I wrong. He took me sailing! I remember telling him once that it looked like fun, and looking back, it was more fun than I expected. He did all the work, but I did get to let out the sail. He had already packed a nice lunch for us, but we had to cut our trip short before we could enjoy the meal. Some thunderstorms were moving in, and the winds were picking up too much, so we had to go back. Instead, we sat on the edge of the dock with our fee
t dangling off the edge while we ate our sandwiches. Luckily, it never rained.
After we ate, we stayed there and talked for a while. He seemed preoccupied with something, but he just wouldn't spit it out. Every time I asked what was wrong, he would hug me or kiss me, so just as long as I wasn't the problem . . .
Just as we started to walk back to the car, I told him that I wished that we could stay here forever and that I didn't want this day to ever end. He just laughed at me, kissed me on the forehead, and said, "That's what memories are for." Then, he stooped over to pick something up and was down on one knee. I've decided that all men should be taught never to kneel down on one knee unless they want to propose; I think my heart literally stopped until I saw a piece of rope in his hand. He bent over and tied the thin cord around my ankle, telling me that it will help me remember my first sailing trip. I think he did it to be funny, but every time I look down at it, I can't help but to smile and remember.
Next, we went to the summer carnival that comes into town each year. We rode every ride at least ten times and played all of the games. I won a goldfish, but I gave it to a little girl. My favorite was the Ferris wheel. It came to a halt almost every time that we made it around to the top. I have a sneaking suspicion that he paid the attendant to do that on purpose. As soon as it would stop, he would pull me close and kiss me deeply and passionately for those few moments until we began our descent. He hasn't ever kissed me like that before.
Last, we went down to a beach bonfire party. I changed into my swimsuit in the backseat of the car (luckily it was pitch black by then), and Joe and I swam and sat around the fire with our friends for the rest of the evening. One of Joe's friends snapped a picture of us with one of those nifty instant cameras, and it has become my favorite picture ever. A perfect reminder of a perfect day.
I don't know how, but I fell asleep during the short ride home. I woke up as Joe leaned over to kiss me after he pulled into my driveway. He wrapped both arms around me, kissed me with even more passion than before, and told me that he loved me. He loves me!!
He made plans to see me tomorrow, but I don't like the sound of it. Something about it makes my stomach churn. I know he has to leave at the end of the summer for college, but that is still nearly a month away. I'll try not to worry about it now because . . . he loves me!
Regina
After a peaceful night, I'm happy to wake up in a contented mood. I feel well rested for a change, and I'm glad knowing that I have a full agenda for the day. Reading my mom's latest journal entry and feeling her exhilaration has helped to lighten my mood, and I can't wait to visit the marina today. I know I won't be sailing, but I can at least go check it out and sit on the dock. Nana mentioned that I could use her bicycle, so I think I'll take her up on it. She doesn't ride it much anymore, but it appears to be in good shape.
I take a quick shower and run over to have breakfast with Nana, who is engrossed in a game show when I come in. I could hear her cheering for a contestant before I ever opened the door, but she immediately goes back to her focused cooking once she hears me come in.
After we eat and I tell her all about yesterday's events, I run back up to my room to pull my hair up and grab my bag, tossing in the journal in case I want to read a new entry later. But before I could get back out the door, I hear Nana's telltale rap at the door. "Laura, honey, you have a visitor."
I yank the door open to find only her standing there. "Who? Where are they?" She silently looks down to the bottom of the stairs, so I peek around the corner to follow her gaze. "Oh. Thanks, Nana." She scuffs down the stairs as another set of heavy footsteps ascends them.
"What are you doing here, Alex?" I demand, not budging from the doorway. "Fawn warned me that I may be seeing you."
"We need to talk. Just hear me out, and I swear you'll never see me again if you don't want to."
I step back and sigh, allowing him to enter. I find it interesting to see that he doesn't dress down, even on a "vacation." It's probably approaching ninety degrees outside, and he's wearing a crisp white dress shirt and heavily starched charcoal slacks. Getting away from him for a few days has made me realize something . . . I hate pretentious men.
"What do you want, Alex? I have plans."
He sits down on the sofa. "Join me."
"I'm fine. Just get on with it."
"Laura," he says softly, "I know I screwed up, and I know I don't deserve you—"
I don't even want to hear it. "You're right, you don't."
"But," he presses on, "I miss you. I want you to come back home, and I'll do whatever it takes to make that happen. We'll buy a house out in the country, and you can get a dog, like you always talked about. And we can travel . . . anywhere in the world you want to go. We'll also buy you a new car and finally get rid of that old thing you've been driving around."
"Now, see, Alex," I hiss, trying to keep my cool, "I have learned some interesting things about myself and life in general since I've been here."
He chuckles, interrupting me. "You mean to tell me that you've experienced some kind of life-altering epiphany in just a few days?"
"As a matter of fact, I have. For one thing, I now realize exactly how unhappy I was when I was in Baltimore; you wanted to change me into a person that I could never be. And I'm glad you cheated on me because that's what it took for me to realize how miserable I had been."
He stands to approach me. "Laura, you love me. I know you do. You're just mad, and you have every right to be."
"No, Alex," I rebut, my voice rising. "I thought I loved you, but I have also learned something about that, too. And, the fact that you've offered to buy me a house and car just proves what I learned. If you had expressed an interest in me, in getting to know the real me, then I might have thought you were actually genuine, but, instead, you are trying to bribe me with expensive gifts and vacations. Love doesn't have anything to do with where you go together or what you buy one another. Love is spending time with each other and wanting to know every hope, desire, and dream . . . you want nothing more than to learn everything you can about the other person. And when you have that, nothing else matters."
"So, are you telling me that people can't have money and love? That's ridiculous!"
"Yes, they can. But, priority does matter. You even mentioned money first, just then."
Alex sighs. "Come on, sweetheart. I do want to know you, in every way—"
A knock startles the both of us, and Alex, who is closest to the door, pulls it open before I can get to it.
"Uh, hi, Laura," Brooks croaks uncomfortably, peering past Alex to see me. "Is this a bad time?"
"Kind of. Can this wait?" I push my way in front of Alex and force him to step back into the room.
"Well, Jacqueline just asked me to drop this invitation off to you," he spits out hurriedly, shoving the envelope into my hands and looking over my shoulder at my visitor. I turn around just as Alex is sprawling himself across my bed as if he lives here. Brooks barely strains his lips into a tight smile, trying to fight back his wounded expression. "I hope you can make it, and of course, you can bring someone if you want."
"Thanks, Brooks. We'll talk later, okay?"
"I'll be gone all day, so I'll catch up with you another time." Without a goodbye, he turns and is out of the garage within seconds.
I slam the door and face Alex, who seems quite pleased with himself as he snuggles up with my pillow. "What do you think you're doing? Get off of my bed and see yourself out."
He doesn't move. "Who's the guy? Your new boyfriend?"
"Not that it's any of your business, but no. He's just a friend."
"Does he know that?"
"Alex . . . leave. What I do or whom I am friends with is no longer of your concern. I listened to you, and now I want you out. And you better pray to God that I never see your face again."
"We'll see, Laura. I won't give up just yet. I bet you're calling me within a week."
I jerk the door open and motion for him to l
eave. "Tell you what, hold your breath until I do."
"You're so feisty," he teases, rolling off the bed onto his feet. "One of the reasons I'm so attracted to you." As he reaches the door, he leans in to kiss me goodbye, and I shove him back.
"Goodbye," I state firmly, as he grins and slinks out the door.
Oh, good grief, I think to myself. I have to get out of here before someone else shows up.
Chapter Sixteen — In the Company of Nakedness
Brooks:
I drop Laura off at home after the cookout and come home to an empty house. I guess Ashton and Will are still professing their love. What a soap opera . . .
I decide to wait up for Jacqueline to get home, so instead of going directly to bed, I go into the den and settle into the plush leather cushions, turning on the television. Normally, I would avoid her at all costs, but I have to find out what she's up to and how she knew about Laura's ex-boyfriend. Jacqueline always has a hidden agenda; innocence was drowned out by deceit long ago.
Even though I try hard to stay awake, sleep deprivation from yesterday is taking its toll, and I feel myself being lulled into slumber. I put up a fight for short while, but I eventually allow sleep to overcome me, pulling me into a state of delusion in which I can't tell if I am conscious or not.
I suddenly find myself at my feet, dazed and unsure of my surroundings. Familiar white cords are attached to my hands and feet again, and I— a living marionette—quickly realize that I am back at the mercy of the puppeteer. Following the strings, I look above me to find Jacqueline and my father working harmoniously to move me down a church aisle. But this time, I am led toward the exit instead of the altar.
Spinning my head around, I see a bride wearing a layered gauzy veil, and Ashton and Will are standing on either side of her. Overcome with curiosity, I pull and thrash against the strings until they snap, one by one. Running up to the gleaming white bride, I carefully lift the veil.
Laura.
Ashton's giggling jolts me back into consciousness, and I bound off the couch, realizing that my seemingly short nap was, in fact, several hours. The first rays of sunlight are stretching across the room in thin, glowing rods, and the warm scent of coffee tickles at my nose.
