by P. Jameson
“I know what I said.” He lifted his hand, palm out, like he was pressing it against a glass. That invisible barrier between them. “Hold my hand. Don’t make me ask again, woman.”
Her eyes flared and his wolf was aware of her reaction to his dominance. His mate was so beautifully submissive. She was the perfect match for him.
Slowly, Seleka lifted her own hand and inched it closer to his. When her fingers made contact with his, it was a petal soft brush, tentative but hopeful. Like his fucking heart. God, what was he going to do with her? How could he ever do right by her?
Sliding her slender fingers between his, she curled them, pressing their palms together, and he could hardly breathe through his need. He wanted so much more, just like he’d known he would.
Her eyes went to his face, worried. “Am I doing it right?”
“There’s no wrong way,” he croaked. “You can’t mess this up, mate.”
“Okay, good.” She blew out a relieved breath.
“Relax,” he found himself saying. She was so damn nervous.
“I’m trying.”
What had made her this way?
But he already knew.
She was raised Ozarka. Raised just as brutally as he was. Where he was taught that nothing was more important than pride and valor, she was taught obedience at the cost of her own desires.
They were a real fucked-up pair, and it had everything to do with where they came from.
It was a good damn thing they were so far away from that. Maybe… maybe together they could find a new way. Maybe.
“Raden.” Her fragile voice warned him she wasn’t okay, and he blew out a hard breath, determined to keep steady for her. His name on her lips was like medicine for his soul.
Just as he was about to pull her into his arms and give in completely, she yanked her hand away as if he’d burned her.
“Stop. Just stop. It’s enough,” she said, sadness permeating the air around them. “You don’t have to do this anymore.” She looked away, a defeated sound rising in her throat. “My animal won’t let this happen. I want us to be okay. I want to move forward, but the wolf just… we can’t let anyone settle for something they don’t want,” she said, decidedly. “Not you, and especially not me.” Tears flooded her lids and she quickly brushed them away.
“You don’t want this?”
“Not this. I want something real. I want you to want me. I want… I want love. O-or the potential for love. Not pity. This was a mistake.”
She stood so fast, the rocker jolted him, and practically ran for the door. Stop her, his wolf roared.
“Seleka,” he barked, letting all his dominant instincts flare to the surface, and she froze just as she reached the entrance. He watched her shoulders heave as he slowly stood, his shadow overtaking her in the soft moonlight. “Don’t. Move.”
“I’ve…” She swallowed hard and he tracked her breaths, inching closer. She was a magnetic force drawing him in, and once he got close enough, she was going to consume him. He was going to let her. There would be no stopping what happened between them. “I’ve longed for you all this time. Missed you desperately. Waited for you to return.” Her admission came as a soft whisper but the effect it had on his heart was like a thunderstorm. She’d waited for him to come back. But he didn’t. Goddamn it, he’d had reasons, even if they didn’t seem important at the moment. “I thought if I could find you, if I could just get to you… you would feel it, this… yearning. I don’t know what else to do.”
“Seleka.” His voice was gravel, and slowly, she turned to face him. “You want real?”
“Yes,” she breathed.
He took the last step that would bring him chest to chest with her. Carefully, he brushed the hair away from her face. Holding her cheeks, he ran a thumb across her lower lip, a warning of what was to come.
“Every fucking day away from you was torture,” he ground out. “There wasn’t a single fucking minute that you didn’t cross my mind. Not one. And now that you’re here, I’m trying… trying goddamn it, to keep from claiming and marking you, because if I do… there will be no taking it back.”
Her eyes softened, roaming all over his face in search of an explanation. “I don’t understand. Raden, you…”
Words couldn’t communicate what he needed to say. Nothing could except his animal, his beast, to hers. Body to body. Instinct to instinct. Enough was enough. He was done denying what they both needed because of his fucking pride.
“Fuck it,” he said, and dipped his head to finally capture her lips, searing the truth into her.
If a claiming was what it took to make her see the truth, then he was going to claim the hell out of her tonight.
Chapter Twelve
Seleka held her breath as Raden’s mouth came down on hers. His hands on her face steadied her when the contact made her feel like she’d float away. His lips were firm yet soft, as they pried her mouth open and his tongue slipped inside, searching for hers. He tasted dark and decadent. Like chocolate and the whiskey he loved so much. His scent invaded her, and she wanted to bask in it. It was comfort. I was security. But it was something else too.
It made her feel powerful. She’d never felt this kind of power before and it was addictive.
He leaned back, breathing hard as he stared into her eyes. The dazed, hungry look she saw there gave her a thrill. It was the same look he’d given her when she stripped in the woods, but exponentially hotter because his hands were on her.
More. She wanted more.
With her hand on his neck she pulled him down, slamming her mouth back to his, desperate for more of his taste. He growled, pushing her against the door, and before she knew it, he’d shoved his leg between her thighs to press against her needy heat. She moaned at the contact, but his mouth caught the sound, as he kissed new life into her.
Yesssss, her animal purred. Mine.
“Raden,” she gasped when his mouth left hers to travel along her jaw, down the column of her neck and across the expanse of skin where her shirt came to a V.
“I’m not stopping, mate. Don’t ask me to.”
Why would she ask him to stop? “Don’t want you to,” she managed as his strong hand raked down the front of her shirt to rip buttons free.
Peeling the halves of her shirt away, he stared at her body and she watched his gaze turn to fire. “Goddamn,” he whispered. “You are…” He didn’t finish as his palm came up to cup one aching breast.
Aching. God, she ached for him.
It was a new realization. That the yearning she felt for him wasn’t just in her heart. It was with her body too. Or more accurately, her entire being.
No… that wasn’t all there was to it.
There was something else. Something just outside of her understanding, that amplified everything she was feeling in the moment.
The bond, her wolf murmured, and she went still, realizing it was true. A mating bond was forming, heavy and thick between them.
Raden’s breath poured over her skin as he skimmed his lips across her breast. “I need to get you inside… need to get inside you…” He shook his head, and a wry laugh escaped his throat. “You’ve got me all tangled up, my pretty mate.”
My pretty mate.
She’d never heard sweeter words.
But old doubts creeped in. “What if I’m not like any female you’ve had before?”
He frowned. “I’ve been with none, Seleka. I was taught it was honorable to save myself for you. I didn’t want any other female to have what wasn’t hers. And after I left Ozarka…” He shook his head, leaving her to fill in the blanks.
Relief pounded through her as she realized they were experiencing this first together.
Her palm smoothed under his shirt, seeking out his rippled abs. “What if I mess up?” she whispered.
“Impossible. You were meant for me.” He reached behind her to open the door, walking her backward through it. She loved the way he guided her body whichever way he wanted
it to go. I satisfied her submissive nature and made her feel safe.
“I didn’t get to ask you the rest of the questions.”
“Your questions are ridiculous.”
“How else will I learn?”
“The same way I will. Practice.” He kissed her deep again, and pulled back to give her that burning man look. “See? Already a fucking pro at that.”
He lifted her into his arms and carried her to his bedroom, setting her on her feet beside the bed. She let him unzip her jeans and slide them down her legs before following them down with her panties. The cool air on her burning sex stole her breath from her chest.
When she was completely bare, she let her eyes drift to his waist. A hard ridge caused his pants to bulge and the desire to touch him there… anywhere… everywhere… was so intense it cramped her chest.
In a heartbeat, he’d ripped his shirt over his head, revealing all that stacked muscle that she remembered from before. Except this time, it wasn’t covered in blood from fighting. His eyes never left her as he roughly undid his belt and freed his erection. She blinked at the size.
“Raden…”
“It’s okay, mate. Trust me.”
“I do.”
His gaze snapped to hers. “You have no reason to. I’ve let you down. I should have come for you. I should’ve taken you with me. Anything but what I did.” He stepped toward her, their bare skin finally brushing. She gasped at the sensation. “Will you forgive me?” She opened her mouth to answer, but he beat her to it by pressing his finger to her lips. “Be sure, Seleka. Because if you say yes…” His trembling words were raw with emotion. “I will never let you go.”
For the first time, she realized that she’d been carrying the entire weight of their failed mating on her shoulders. And it wasn’t only her burden to bear. They were two parts of a whole. She’d just been waiting for him to realize it. She’d been standing there, holding his portion until he could pick it up himself. Which meant…
She wasn’t weak at all.
A smile curved her lips and she felt the weight of a thousand worries float away. She was submissive. She was patient. She was quiet. She was calm She was all those things…
And she was a certified badass.
She curved her hand around Raden’s scarred cheek and found his dark eyes, drinking in their intensity, their dominance. Curling into their depths where she belonged. “Yes,” she said. “I will forgive every piece of the past, because without it, we wouldn’t be here, like this, now.”
His fingers skimmed over her hip, down her thigh, until she was shaking with need. When they started the journey back upward, it was on the inside of her leg, and only stopped when he made contact with her sensitive folds. He speared his fingers through the slick wetness and Seleka gasped, her claws pricking the ends of her fingers to dig into his shoulder. In his eyes, she saw his barely restrained animal grappling with control. It was a heady feeling knowing she had the power to make him lose it.
“Seleka…”
“Take what’s yours,” she whispered, offering herself one last time.
And this time… he did.
With a growl she felt all the way to her bones, he took her down to the bed, kissing her until she was weak with pleasure.
***
Everything was different. Everything had changed.
In the breath it took for Seleka to touch his cheek, everything about Raden shifted into something new. Bitterness evaporated. Regret vanished. The pain he held so close to his heart was painted over with something new.
Love, his beast roared in victory. As if this was the battle he’d been trying to win all along.
Maybe it was.
She was a fucking miracle. His fucking miracle.
He didn’t know what would happen after this night. Didn’t know if he’d be able to keep her forever, but he was going to give her his mark. And he was going to be the best damn male he could for her.
Lowering her to the bed, he kissed her everywhere. Any place he’d wondered about over the years. Any spot he’d dreamed in his sleep. All the places he’d longed to explore and taste. He took his time getting acquainted with his mate’s body, ramping up her need until she writhed beneath him, frantic and desperate.
“Raden,” she cried when his mouth spread her pussy open to lick her center. She tasted like sweet fucking dreams and home.
Home, his wolf agreed. Seleka was what he would always come back to, no matter where pride or fear or the world would take him. She was every endpoint from now until forever.
Her body jerked beneath his tongue and he pulled back to use his thumb on her so he could watch her face as she came. Fuck, she was beautiful, spread before him like this. Vulnerable and trusting.
This time, he wouldn’t let her down.
“Need to… touch you…” she gasped, trying to catch her breath. “Please.”
He went to his knees, letting her wrap her slender fingers around his girth. Her touch felt like heaven, making the muscles of his thighs quiver with need. He closed his eyes, his head falling back on his shoulders. He wouldn’t last if she kept—
A new sensation brought his thoughts to a grinding halt and he opened his eyes to find his mate’s mouth enveloping his cock. “Fuck,” he bit out, grinding his teeth to keep from losing it. She sucked him to the back of her throat before slowly sliding to the tip to give him the softest little kiss.
The side of her mouth curved up as she found his eyes. “You do like it,” she said.
He didn’t answer. Couldn’t.
He gripped her hips, flipping her on the bed so her ass was in the air. It was time to claim his mate.
“Are you ready for my mark?” he growled.
She squealed as he rubbed his hardness along her slit, ready to press into her. “Yesss. Mark me. Do it hard,” she said. “I never want to forget this.”
“I’ll never let you,” he promised.
And then he slammed into her, busting through her virgin barrier until he was seated so deep they were one. “Fuck!” he roared, at the sensation of finally being inside his woman. Her breath stalled as he went still, letting her adjust to his size. The wolf in her would love this. The human might not.
“Baby…” He ran a shaking hand up her spine, burying his fingers in her hair to massage her scalp. “Relax, sweet,” he crooned. Her body was like a vice on him. They were trapped until she could relax.
“More,” she rasped.
“Not yet.” Not until she could take it.
“More!” This time her cry was desperate. “Take me. I need it.”
“I won’t hurt your,” he snarled at her ear. Her shoulders sank and he deepened his touch on her scalp. “We go slow until it feels good.” Carefully, he inched out of her tight hold and eased back in. A little bit, and then some more, until the tension left her body. “Then I will take you hard like you want.”
When her hips started rising to meet his measured thrusts, he knew she was ready. And just in time because the drag and pull of their bodies coming together was almost too much. He catalogued every detail, knowing in moments, it would be over.
Seleka threw her head back, strawberry hair like ribbons of silk looping down her shoulders. She had three freckles on her hip. He was going to claw her there. Her sounds erupted in the room as she came again, squeezing his cock to completion.
With a final roar, he swiped his extended claws over her hip and lower back, and marked her with his scent. Mine.
Mine, his wolf roared, feeling all at once complete as their bond locked into place.
Mine.
And nothing would ever change that.
Chapter Thirteen
Seleka awoke to two very different sensations. The burning on her lower back that felt like she’d been licked by fire. And the freezing air she was breathing into her lungs. What was going on? In her groggy, lust-sated state, she couldn’t open her eyes, much less get her bearings.
“Cold,” she murmured, and she f
elt the bed shift. Memories of what she and Raden had done flooded back, filling her with happiness. So much that she almost forgot about her back burning. “Ow.”
She felt the heat of his body as he leaned close, and then the soft press of lips at her shoulder… so maybe the burning wasn’t so bad. Her mouth curved up in a lazy grin and she tried again to open her eyes. She found him staring at her under the muted early morning light.
“I kept the blanket off your back so the mark would scab over,” he explained. That explained the burning sensation. “Does it hurt?”
“A little.” Her dreamy sigh should have been embarrassing, and instinct made her want to cover it with a cough. But the way Raden looked at her now… she didn’t feel the need to hide anymore.
They were bonded now. He could read her like a book. And she, him. So when his gaze jerked away, she couldn’t help the feeling woe that settled in her chest.
He twisted out of the bed, standing to his full height but not bothering to cover his waist… or his erection. “I’ll go stoke the fire,” he murmured. “Stay here where it’s warm.”
She watched him walk away before she contorted her body in an attempt to see her new mating mark. Only the corner could be seen without a mirror, but the hint of three claw marks slashed across her hip toward her back, and they screamed property of a wildman. Much to her satisfaction.
Raden returned, pulling back the blankets to slide back in beside her. He pulled her under his arm, carefully avoiding the wound on her hip, and pressed her head down to his chest. But he said nothing.
She let the silence build in the air as their bond swirled with what she could only describe as uncertainty. Until the wondering became too much, and she had to ask.
“What’s wrong?”
He sighed, running his hand along her arm, as if touching her brought him comfort. “Nothing’s wrong, mate. I’m just thinking.”
“Thinking about what?”
“The past. The future.”
The future. Why did the word sound so ominous coming from his lips?
“The present?”
