“Justine?”
“Hmm?”
“What’s really going on with you and Cal? Is he working you too hard? I warned you not to take this assignment—”
“No. We settled that early on when I threatened to quit. So there’s no overtime and I get regular breaks to stretch out my leg.” She remembered the intensity in Cal’s eyes the first time she’d demonstrated her poses. The thought made her shiver now as it had then and she knew he’d wanted her as badly as she wanted him. And the explosion of desire between them was way better than okay.
“I’m glad you didn’t let him walk all over you. But—” An uneasy silence followed that word. “I’m not psychic, either, but I know you and I can hear in your voice that everything’s not right. What’s going on? A vacation romance for you, too?”
“Why would you say that?”
There was a long silence on the other end of the line. Then Shanna said, “You know the way you know me so well? It works both ways. I nailed it, didn’t I? There’s something going on between you and Cal, isn’t there?”
“Not as dramatic as what’s going on with you,” she answered.
“No way.” Shanna’s voice wasn’t quite a shriek, but close. “You and Cal? Doing the wild thing?”
Such a fitting way to put it. “Yes, we are mixing business with pleasure,” Justine admitted, without detailing the numerous ways he pleasured her every night.
“So, the workaholic has a heart, after all.” There was an approving smile in Shanna’s voice.
“As you said, he’s a good guy when you get to know him. But it’s a little soon to talk about heart involvement.”
“Hey, I’m engaged to be married and it’s been a similar time frame. Is there something I should know?”
“You’re asking about love—”
“Duh.”
“The answer is that there is no answer. It’s still new—”
“What do you want, Justine?”
“That’s a good question. We haven’t discussed anything, and even if we did—”
“This is me, J. I know you’re afraid.” Her friend’s voice was as gentle and supportive as a hug.
“I prefer to think of it as being unprepared. Even though I made a conscious choice to move on with my life as Wes and Betsy would want, I was thinking in terms of letting myself not be sad anymore. This, with Cal, isn’t something I ever expected to face again after losing the people I loved most in the world.”
This ambivalence seemed so stupid since she was the one who had opened the door by asking Cal why he didn’t want her. Talk about mixed signals.
“You were prepared to be alone but not to face falling in love and the potential pain of it. And I’m not just talking about losing someone the way you did your husband. There are other ways to be hurt. And Cal has baggage.”
“I know. He told me about his marriage.” The newly reawakened part of her had accepted that living life meant opening herself up to a relationship—the highs, lows and complete mess of it. But now... “You nailed it, Shannie. I think this uneasiness is resistance to potential pain.”
“Oh, honey—” Her friend sighed loudly. “I wish I could tell you it will be all right, but there’s no way to be sure. So the best strategy I can come up with is this. Just enjoy yourself and don’t create problems where there aren’t any. Have no expectations and live in the moment.”
That made sense. She was making this complicated when it didn’t need to be. Have fun and don’t expect more.
“Excellent advice, Shannie.”
Justine truly meant that and planned to take it. She felt as if the weight of the world had lifted from her shoulders.
* * *
“Well, well, well.” Cal ended the call with his soon-to-be ex-assistant and looked at Justine working beside him on the sofa. “Shanna said you already know about her engagement and resignation.”
“Yes. She called during my break.”
It hadn’t escaped his notice that she’d come back from that break much lighter of spirit than when she left. He knew that was his fault. Things had changed between them and she would want definition of what was happening. He knew only one way to define it. Simple and straightforward. Being with her was...good.
“She sounded very happy,” he said.
“I thought so, too.” Justine took off her glasses and tossed them on the coffee table, on the spreadsheet they’d been studying before Shanna called him. “Believe me, I grilled her like raw hamburger. It’s a big step to pick up your life and move it to another state. I wanted to make sure she’d given this decision a lot of thought.”
“And?”
“She said when you know, you just know.”
“Hmm.”
Cal knew a lot of things. He liked Justine very much. In fact, he’d go so far as to say he’d never felt this way about a woman, ever. But these circumstances were different. It wasn’t the real world, where things had a way of not working out. “For Shanna’s sake, I hope what she thinks she knows goes the way she wants it to.”
“I agree. On the other hand, I’ve become a believer in not wasting time.”
Because no one knew how much time they had, he thought. That must have been a hard lesson for her. He wanted to scoop her up, pull her against him and make the shadows in her eyes disappear. But this was work time. When he’d crossed the line from professional into personal, he’d promised himself to keep the two separate. It wasn’t easy with her looking like temptation in a sleeveless cotton dress. If he was being honest, it wouldn’t matter what she wore because he knew every inch of what was underneath. And he couldn’t seem to get enough of that.
And that’s why he didn’t look at her during work hours unless it was absolutely necessary.
“So,” Justine said, “you’re going to need a replacement for Shanna. Do you want me to start looking through your existing employees? If you don’t find anyone, we can open up a wider search.”
“That sounds like a good plan.” He noticed her giving him a strange look. “What?”
“For a man who barely gave his assistant a day off, you’re taking this resignation of your right-hand person remarkably well.”
“On the outside,” he clarified. “On the inside I’m having a spectacular meltdown.”
“No one would ever guess. Maybe your vacation has given you the reserves to keep your inner pouter just where he belongs.”
She might have a point about the battery recharge. And in a few days the revitalizing would be over. When he’d arrived, his attitude was resentment, as if he’d been given a time-out even though he’d accepted the bet. He was all about hunkering down and gritting his teeth to get through, to do whatever he had to in order to win. Then he went skydiving. What was that saying? Men plan and God laughs.
He looked his fill at Justine’s fresh, pretty, peaceful face and felt his chest grow tight with tenderness. Hurting his leg might just have been the luckiest break he ever got.
“Okay, then,” she said. “I’ll contact Human Resources in Blackwater Lake and get them going on finding a replacement for Shanna. Then we can finish going over the cost analysis for this project—”
He held up a hand to stop her. “That can wait.”
“What?” She blinked at him, obviously surprised.
“Finding another Shanna will work itself out, but we only have a few days left on the island. I think we should take advantage of that and do something fun today.”
A slow smile curved up the corners of her mouth before she wiped an imaginary tear from the corner of her eye with a knuckle. “My little boy is all grown up.”
“Very funny.” He was pretty sure last night in bed he’d shown her exactly how grown up he was, but that’s not what she meant. He grinned. “What do you say we go basket weaving ag
ain?”
“I say the surprises keep on coming.” She was staring at him as if he’d just sprouted another head.
“Let’s just say I’m determined to master the skill.”
“Your aggressive streak is showing.” She thought for a moment. “Competitive basket weaving. Could be an Olympic event.”
“You mock me, but never say never. Are you game for it today?”
“Twist my arm.” She stood and walked over to the desk to get her purse. “Ready when you are.”
After securing transportation, he took her to lunch at the nearby resort. Then they joined a few other guests for the class being held at the picnic table area with a spectacular view of the ocean. The breeze was more than pleasant and the sky an indescribably stunning shade of blue without a cloud in sight. Justine sat beside him, her shoulder brushing his as they laughed and teased. The afternoon was perfect—in spite of basket weaving.
Cal followed directions and carefully wove the reeds together, doing his damnedest to create a functional thing. But his hands felt too big and clumsy. The materials were too unwieldy and delicate.
He stared ruefully at the finished product. “Guess what it is.”
“A colander?” Although she tried to look serious, there was laughter in her eyes as she studied the dysfunctional crisscrossing of palm fronds. “There are so many spaces for water to drain.”
Frowning, he held up what he’d made—whether for inspection or more ridicule wasn’t clear. “There was a time when this being less than perfect would have bothered me. But not anymore.”
“Really?”
“Truly. Now I see it as a way to spend an afternoon outside and enjoy the view. Today wasn’t about fortunes being made and lost or life and death. Just a pleasant diversion.”
“What you’re trying to say is that you’re relaxed.”
“I really am,” he agreed.
“So the family intervention was a good thing and made you a vacation convert.”
“Yes.” He sighed, then looked away from the view and met her gaze. “There’s only one downside as far as I can see.”
“Oh?”
“I don’t want to go back.”
Part of that was about wanting to stay in this perfect paradise. But mostly it was about Justine. Leaving would change—this—whatever it was. He couldn’t label the feelings and didn’t really want to. He just wanted it to be. Leaving could and would make everything different, and for reasons he didn’t want to examine closely, he wasn’t looking forward to that.
“I would say that your time off was a rousing success.” She beamed at him as if he was her prize pupil. “Maybe more important—you have learned that work and play are better with balance.”
“That’s very Zen of you.” He studied her. “And you’re responsible for making me aware that this is beneficial. You may have noticed that I wasn’t very open-minded about this in the beginning.”
“No. Really?” She laughed.
“Smart aleck.” But he was serious. “I realized that the rest of the world can go on without me for a little while.”
“You embraced the message. And it can be life-altering,” she agreed.
“There you go being glass-half-full again. You’re very good at this whole yoga thing.”
“Thanks. Coming from you that’s high praise.” She looked at the tidy little basket she’d made, then at him. “And it reassures me that my decision to open my own yoga studio was the right one.”
“What?” Had she mentioned this before?
“Yes. The whole reason I accepted this assignment with you was the generous salary. That will make it possible for me to open my own business sooner than I’d planned.”
“You’re abandoning Hart Energy? We just talked about picking up one’s life and moving.”
“That was about Shanna and getting married. My situation is very different.”
“How?”
“For one thing, I’ve already moved.”
And unlike Shanna, she wasn’t getting married, he thought. The M-word always put a knot in his stomach. “When did you decide this was what you wanted?”
“I’ve been planning for this quite a while. It was more than exercise, but a course of therapy that literally got me back on my feet after the accident. I want to pay it forward and help others.”
“It’s really important to you.” That wasn’t a question.
She tucked a strand of red hair behind her ear and nodded. “When the announcement was made about the move to Blackwater Lake I started researching the area. There’s development happening that will bring in a clientele who will benefit from the lifestyle, service and philosophy I want to provide. Another plus is that there’s nothing like it in town. In Dallas there was a yoga studio practically on every corner. And—”
“What?” he asked softly. Her eyes had turned more green than brown, and he had a feeling he knew what she was going to say.
“I needed a scenery change. There were memories everywhere and it seemed like a good idea to move forward in a new place.”
“Sounds like you’ve really thought it through.”
“They say you never work a day in your life if you do something you love. For me there’s no downside.”
For him it felt just the opposite, although Cal couldn’t say exactly why that was. He’d been surprisingly okay with Shanna jumping ship, but not so much with Justine doing the same thing. It had nothing to do with work because she hadn’t been his assistant in the Blackwater Lake office. Briefly he’d considered offering her Shanna’s position but immediately discarded the idea.
Justine was a distraction he couldn’t afford on a permanent professional basis. No, his unease was strictly about change. It was the only thing one could count on, but that didn’t mean he was okay with it. His instinct was to fix whatever made him uneasy, and he knew from past experience that actions taken under pressure never went well.
Note to self: there is nothing here to fix.
Another note to self: repeat until the first note sinks in.
Chapter Twelve
“I can’t believe it. No more plaster leg, no more hobbling around supported by sticks.”
It was late afternoon. Justine and Cal had just returned to the villa from the doctor, where he’d had his cast removed. He was ecstatic and grinned from ear to ear.
Justine smiled back. If anyone knew how good it felt to have free use of a limb again, it was her. “At the end you were better than a hobble. Just saying.”
Cal spontaneously pulled her into his arms and held her so tight she could hardly breathe. Against her hair he said, “I honestly don’t think I could have gotten through this without you, Justine.”
“I’m glad I was here.”
For so many reasons, but one was completely selfish. Because of him she’d taken a giant step forward in her emotional recovery. She knew now that it was possible for her to be happy again, truly happy and content and not simply pretending for everyone else.
Taking a step back out of his arms, she looked up and met his gaze. “So, it’s your last day here. Do you want to tie up loose work ends? Just pack everything up? Or—”
“Are you kidding?” He looked at her as if she’d suddenly turned green. “It’s our last day on the island.”
“I know. That’s what I just said. Where do you want me to focus my time and energy? Organizing paperwork? Making phone calls—”
He touched a finger to her lips to stop the flow of words. “It’s our last day on the island. I’m quite sure it’s in the vacation convert handbook that on the final day before returning to one’s humdrum, mundane life, the inexperienced vacationer must pack as much fun as possible into the remaining hours. Work?” He crossed his fingers, making an X. “Until we’re on the plane home to
morrow, whoever says the word w-o-r-k will have to pay a forfeit.”
“Which is?”
He thought for a moment, then grinned. “A kiss.”
“Now there’s a deterrent,” she scoffed, before standing on tiptoe and touching her mouth to his.
“What was that for?”
“I just banked a forfeit,” she said.
“Yeah.” He scratched his head. “I’ll have to think of something really bad. Like cuddling in the corner.”
“Right. A time-out with benefits?”
He shrugged. “We could stand here and debate or go have an adventure.”
“Well, you’re the one dealing with physical limitations for the last month, so what would you like to do? And before you answer, defining adventure would be good. Your last one ended with that leg in a cast.”
“Right. No parasailing, hang gliding or rock climbing.”
“I knew you weren’t just another pretty face. So, what’ll it be?”
“I want to walk on the sand, down by the water. Get my feet wet.” His blue eyes darkened with focus and it was all directed at her. “With you.”
Her pulse jumped once as if to say, Oh, boy.
“That sounds like just what the doctor ordered,” she said.
“Good. Go put on a swimsuit.”
“Why?” she asked suspiciously.
“Because water is wet.” It was half statement, half question and all mischief.
“But—” She glanced down at her right leg and realized that covering the scars was always uppermost in her mind.
Cal’s expression gentled. “Every single part of you is beautiful. The marks made you who you are, and that’s a person I admire and like very much.”
“Thank you—”
“I hear a but in your voice because you were going to say my good opinion means zilch when a stranger stares at your leg.”
Amused now, she folded her arms over her chest. “Was I?”
“Yes. And you know what my response would be?”
“Don’t keep me in suspense,” she said drily.
His by Christmas Page 14
