"This is magic," Feris murmured, fingers repeating the motion again and again.
Every nerve in his body twisted and pinged and he could only breathe harshly and return the sensation to Feris through his own fingers. "It certainly feels like magic, Feris."
Feris nodded, licking at his lips, fingers busy at their new-found occupation. Soon his nipples became so sensitive that even the slightest touch made him cry out. "Feris. Feris, stop. I have something else to show you."
Feris stroked his nipples again, shaft hot and pressed hard against his skin. "More?"
"Oh, yes." Wiggling, he scooted up so he was sitting, with Feris straddling him, and bent to take one of Feris' nipples between his lips.
Feris roared again, heat splashing against his belly this time as a shudder moved through the sturdy body.
"An neal." Feris sounded stunned.
Oh. So good. So responsive and willing, his Feris. So unlike anything he had ever had. "Yes. You see, Feris? There is always more."
Feris purred for him, pressing their lips together and kissing him eagerly.
They rocked together as Anneal sought his own pleasure, pressing against Feris on each thrust, that hot skin all but scalding him, Feris' seed easing his way. Feris put a hand between them, wrapping it around his prick.
That was what he needed. Just exactly that, and Anneal thrust again and again, crying out as he came into Feris' fist.
Feris kept kissing, hand moving slowly on him. "This is good, An neal. "
"Mmm." Drowsy and content, Anneal nodded. "Very good."
Better than good. Feris was the best thing ever to come into Anneal's life.
~Chapter Eleven~
The fire was low, and the cave cold, but Anneal was warm, very warm, snuggled up against the body next to him. Warm and hard. So hard. Feris made him hard. His sweet Feris, who had a sort of innocence mixed with feral possessiveness and excited him beyond any lover he'd ever had.
Feris felt wonderful against him, soft and smooth and so hot it burned, and Anneal pressed against that long back, pushing his erect shaft against his lover, moaning at the friction. Feris purred, the sound low and vibrating through him.
Yes. The sound added to his hunger, and Anneal pulled close, one hand digging in, the other going to his cock to press it more firmly against Feris. Feris pushed back, rubbing.
Felt like sunshine, his Feris. Making his skin heat and tingle, making his balls draw up. Anneal all but straddled Feris' body, panting, humping hard. A low growl sounded, Feris still pushing back against him, still helping. Soon Anneal felt it rise in his spine, that perfect little death, and he cried out, pumping his hips, seed spilling onto Feris' warm body.
As he lay against Feris, gasping, he was shrugged off, Feris turning and beginning to lick at his seed, the big cat purring as the rough tongue licked at him.
The big cat. Licking him. He had not even the strength of will to push Feris away, but Anneal was unnerved. He had never... well it was one thing when Feris was human.
Tonight, however, Feris was not.
When had he stopped differentiating between Feris the man and Feris the cat as his lover? Because he had. Which was, well, frankly disturbing.
Certainly both of them were protective, and possessive of him. In fact it was Feris the cat that had accepted him first, the man taking longer. Yet the man could be explained, even if it was something he knew other men would frown upon. But the cat?
Anneal pushed Feris away. "Stop."
Feris growled and head butted his hand away, continuing to lick.
"Feris, I said no." Anneal scrambled, putting his back to Feris, suddenly horribly self conscious.
Feris growled again and swiped at his ass with one big paw. It didn't hurt, the big cat's claws were not in evidence, but Feris' hurt was clear. Then Feris disappeared, loping out of the cave.
His head spun, as his first reaction was to go after Feris, to make it right.
All he would manage though, would be to get lost in the dark, and perhaps freeze to death.
Because suddenly it was cold.
***
Cold night.
Cold inside.
Man push away.
Growl.
Snarl.
Roar.
Angry.
Hurt.
Cold.
His cave.
His man.
His cave.
Growl.
Go back.
He shifted, still growling. "If you don't want to be with me anymore -- you go. I was here first."
An neal looked at him, eyes red in the bright light of the fire. "I... if you want me to, I will certainly go."
"I do not," he growled. "Himself does not. You pushed. You said no."
He didn't understand. Himself didn't understand. An neal did not hurt them, but this time An neal did.
"Feris." An neal was in pain. The sound was there, the scent. Not blood pain, but hurt anyway. "How can I explain it? It should feel wrong and it does not."
He growled. "You are upset because it feels right?"
He would never understand men.
Ever.
Every time he thought that An neal was different, that An neal was a man who made sense... An neal did some stupid man thing.
"But it should not!" Hand out in appeal, An neal met his eyes straight on. "Not when you are not a man."
"I thought you were different. You care for himself as much as for me!"
"I do." An neal shook his head. "I do. It is just that, oh Feris, a man should not want to love himself that way. Care for him, yes. Love him, of course. But not... physically in that manner."
"More stupid rules," growled Feris.
"Yes. Well, you cannot expect me to be able to overcome a life's training so easily."
"You loved another man even though it was against your rules, your 'lifetime training'." He spat out the words.
"Oh, no, Feris. I never loved him. Not like I do you."
An neal turned pale, head dropping back on those bony knees.
"Love? Is that what this pain is when you push me away? Is that what your love is?"
"I am sorry." Small and miserable, the voice came, and small and miserable An neal looked for all of his gangly height. "I simply have no idea how to handle all of this Feris. I just do not understand it at all."
"You do not understand! You are a man with your stupid man rules that I do not understand."
He growled, unhappy, miserable -- made more so by An neal's obviously unhappiness.
"Quite right. 'Tis my difficulty, not yours, Feris." An neal glanced up once more, managing a smile for him. "You are a delight."
"And himself?"
The smile stayed. "Himself is just as important to me."
He crouched in front An neal. "Then why are you upset? Himself loves you. I... I love you. Why is this wrong?"
Reaching out, An neal brushed his hair away from his face, the touch tender, sweet. "Because it's not? I love you, Feris."
Something in him eased and he leaned into An neal's hand. "That is good, An neal."
"Let me. May I have some time to." An neal sighed. "I need to become accustomed to the idea of loving himself that way, Feris. Could you be you when we make love for the time being?"
He growled lightly. "Himself did not start this, An neal. But it will be as you wish."
Guilt flashed across An neal's face, darkening the familiar red and black marks. An neal's free hand came up, tracing one of the scars there. "You're right, of course ."
He grunted, reached out and traced the other circle. "What is this?"
Eyes dark with memories, An neal shook his head. "It is a tattoo."
"Why?"
"Why? Do you mean why is it there?" Sometimes, An neal was stupid.
He growled, thumbs pressing along both. "You don't like them. Why get them?"
A sharp bark of a laugh pushed An neal's cheeks into his hands. "I did not. They were given to me. By force.
That is why there are regular scars as well."
He shook his head. "I do not understand."
"When I was banished, Feris. They tied me down and carved the signs of my shame into my cheeks." Muscles worked in An neal's throat.
He growled, snarling, anger filling him. "I would kill them for you, An neal."
"I know, Feris. My champion. I am sorry if I upset you. Earlier."
"You are happy now?"
"You make me nothing but happy, Feris." An neal leaned forward, pressing against his hands to touch their lips together. "You and himself, both."
He purred, tongue coming out to taste An neal's mouth.
An neal met him with soft touches that grew harder, more needy.
He could taste the hurt become pleasure in An neal's mouth.
Pleasure that turned into pure need, An neal pushing him down, kissing him fiercely. Hotly.
He growled into the kiss, hands sliding around An neal's back, hips pushing up. An neal pushed down, and their bodies came together hard, rubbing, heat on heat. Long fingers tangled in his hair, An neal holding him still as he was devoured.
He purred up into An neal's mouth. He loved the feeling of their bodies rubbing -- it was so good.
Very good, as Anneal slipped a hand between them and felt his hardness.
He cried out, sliding his own hand to return the favor, touching An neal's very hot heat. His other hand grabbed An neal's buttocks.
"Feris! Oh." An neal pushed down, pressing the backs of their hands together, making him tingle, and then An neal spilled against him, hot and wet.
The scent was new, but growing more familiar, wonderful, enough to make him growl loudly and spread his own pleasure between them. He took all of An neal's weight as the man fell against him, hands still moving on his skin.
He purred, almost shifted, but then didn't, not wanting to upset An neal.
"Mmm. I do love you, Feris. And I will endeavor not to be so stupid, hmm?"
"You are a man, An neal, I must accept that sometimes you will be stupid."
An neal laughed, a sound that trailed off into a soft snore as An neal settled in for a nap.
He was pretty sure that it was still allowed to be himself when they slept.
He shifted.
Purr.
Man close.
Man hot.
Man good.
Sleep.
~Chapter Twelve~
Sometime in the middle of the night, Anneal woke to a nightmare, heart racing and skin clammy.
Why, oh why did his mind insist upon making any sort of difficulty into a siren call for his past to come back and haunt him? His cheeks throbbed, and his stomach hurt, and Anneal knew he could not simply push the troubles away.
He loved Feris. There was nothing wrong with that, nothing at all. Feris was wonderful, so perfectly easy to love, in both forms. And 'twas no secret that he desired Feris. He simply felt he should not desire the cat as well as the man. But really, were they not an extension of one and the same? The Feris who started out as a man carrying a basket for roots and suddenly turned into a cat to dig them had to carry much of the same thought, for all that Feris distinguished between the cat and the man. And it was patently obvious that Feris the cat had loved him long before the man had come 'round.
Unable to get comfortable, Anneal squirmed, trying to find a soft spot on the hard cave floor.
Feris growled softly, the big cat rolling toward him and one paw settling on his stomach.
His own hand fell atop Feris' paw, stroking lightly.
Perhaps he was a terrible hypocrite. Perhaps the only reason he was so unhappy was because spring approached, and he would have to go to the city of his birth once more. He did not wish to leave Feris, but how could he take the cat man with him? If his former people could not understand his urge to share pleasure with a man, they certainly would not see what he and Feris had as right.
A rough tongue licked at his cheek, Feris purring.
Spirits above and below he was a selfish bastard. His taboos meant nothing to Feris, and it was not as if his family or city would take him back at any rate. Anneal was not even certain he would want them to if it meant giving up Feris.
Perhaps it did not feel wrong because it simply was not.
Sighing, Anneal turned to Feris, wrapping about that big, warm body, using it to cushion his aching bones.
Feris shifted. "Sorry," muttered the man in his arms.
"Sorry for what?" The skin of Feris' back cooled quickly, without the heavy fur to warm it, and Anneal stroked that long spine, keeping Feris warm as his lover so often did for him.
"Being himself..."
Oh. His chest tightened. "Never, ever apologize for that, Feris. I am so sorry I hurt you."
"But you said you didn't want... while we were together. For it to be with himself." The golden eyes didn't meet his.
"I know. I..." There would still be doubt in his mind were that to happen, but Anneal could not bear to let his own doubts hurt Feris. "I love him as well as you, Feris. Please. Do not hide from me."
Feris purred, the sound happy. "Truly?"
"Truly." A smile of his own broke through, and Anneal kissed Feris lightly. "I would have all of you. The doubts are but shadows of a life that is no longer mine."
Feris growled and took his mouth, pushing him over onto his back as he was kissed.
His answer must have pleased Feris greatly. The kiss he answered eagerly, astonished at how the need for Feris never seemed diminished.
Feris' hands were warm, moving over his skin, touching and exploring. The feeling left him gasping, moving into the touch, asking for more with body and lips and hands. Smooth, soft, Feris' skin was addictive to him.
He could feel Feris' shaft, thick and hot against his thigh, as his lover learned his skin by fingertips. His own shaft hardened as well, fitting into the hollow of Feris' hip, and he bit into Feris' lower lip. So good.
Feris jerked and moaned, rubbing against him. So responsive to his every touch was Feris, so wonderfully happy with whatever they did. Oh, the things he wished to show Feris, but honestly, the man reduced him to a raw bundle of nerves, and he simply forgot.
They kissed for a long while, his hands sliding from Feris' shoulders down those lean-muscled arms, and in, to pinch at Feris nipples.
"An neal!" Feris' breath grew short, the movements rubbing that shaft against his thigh grew harder.
"Yes. So lovely in your pleasure, Feris." Anneal slid one hand about Feris' hip, stroked the small of Feris' back, dipped into Feris' crease.
Feris shivered and roared, heat spilling between them.
"Oh!" His own seed took only moments beyond that to spill from his body, the feel of Feris against him too much to bear.
Feris purred happily.
He felt like purring himself.
They rested, Feris warm and heavy atop him, and Anneal knew that while the nightmares might not leave him alone, there was no way he could lay them at Feris' feet. He simply could not. Stupid men's rules or not, Feris was the best thing to ever come into his life.
***
Feris liked making love with An neal. A lot.
Himself liked the way it made An neal smell. The want, the musk, the seed, the way it blended their scents together.
He reminded himself that An neal did not wish to make love with himself. Only with Feris. It was not always easy to remember. Himself could smell An neal's want and need before he could and he always had to change before approaching An neal.
Still. It was worth a little trouble to feel as good as the touching made him feel.
Feris went to sit with An neal, who was doing writing again, and put his hand on An neal's thigh.
"Oh!" An neal blew out a burst of air. "Now it is smudged." An neal was so funny when he tried to be stern.
"I could go sit on the other side of the fire again," he offered, though he would be grumpy if An neal said yes.
"No. I shall simply put this away.
" A hint of mischief lit those grey eyes. "Unless you would like another lesson?"
Shifting Page 7
